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this is not an April Fools post

Hey dramastrags, I'm (Lich) back from my (Lv31 btw) ban (5 days) and I (male) just wanted to let you (strags) all know that I (chad) had INTERCOURSE (straight) with a woman (biological) and it was good (not bad but kinda meh tbhwyf)!

Also there is nothing you (gaywads) can do about it (me having straight intercourse for real).

About the girl (female): She's (boring) about 5'7 (feet/inches) and likes long walks on the beach (we don't live near one so wtf did she mean by this) and talking (too much). Her hair is red (ginger) and her eyes are green (demon). Her chromosomes are XX (I demanded a blood test before I consented to anything) according to medical paperwork (results dated 4/29/2022, slight anemia detected). She's also smart (big brain) and gave me (receiving) some good brain (fellatio) if you know what I mean (fellatio). Shit was so cash (enjoyable, not currency)!

Anyway I'm (John) out of here (rdrama.net) and probably gonna smash (have intercourse with) her (bio-foid) again tonight (from 10:30 to about 10:34p.m. Eastern Time). See you later, virgins (lol)!

Oh btw, before I dip just want to ask you all a few things I've been wondering. Honestly, have any of you ever gotten any girl peepee? I mean, I guess it's fun making fun of people because of your own insecurities, but you all take to a whole new level. This is even worse than jerking off to pictures on facebook. You are all cute twinks who should just keep yourselves safe. Thanks for listening.

Cats are literally vermin and will give you brain parasites if you get too close to them. They also hate you and only want to exploit you for their own benefit.

Dogs, on the other hand, are superior in every way.

Edit: thanks for all your doggos, woofers, puppers, floofs, pupperinos, etc. each and every one of them is a good boi and v. v. heckin handsome!

I'd like to condemn @Gigavaccinator for the ban award which prevented me from participating, because I was too poor to override it due to a gambling addiction.

Sincere thanks to @GovernorOfNewYork for unbanning me.

Very sad to see there's so much hostility towards doggos on this site. Y'all need to flush out these brain worms with a big dose of a miracle from the Lord and get your testosterone levels checked.

hello its me SUPER NEKOBIT here to tell you that anyone caught downvoting anime will get mindraped and fricked beyond repair and I will send you to the fricking GULAGS

The internet is powered by ANIME and if you disagree you are a big fat stinky smelly gorilla BIPOC!!!!!!!

FUNNY JAPANESE CARTOONS POWER THE INTERWEBS FOR YEARS AND ANYONE WHO DISAGREES IS A CUTE TWINK ANTI-JAPANESE CHIGGER CHINESE HIRED ASSASSIN who wants to ELIMINATE THE JAPANESE

IMAGINE COMING ON THE INTERNET TO "escape" from the REAL WORLD FOR A TINY LITTLE BIT and then SEETHING when you see things that arent REAL YOU FRICKING BIPOCBABY .... FRICK YOU!!!! FRICK YOU!!!! FRICK YOU!!!! FRICK YOU!!!! FRICK YOU!!!! FRICK YOU!!!! FRICK YOU!!!! FRICK YOU!!!! FRICK YOU!!!! FRICK YOU!!!! FRICK YOU!!!!

IN FACT IT IS A PERFECT SIGN THAT PEOPLE WHO DONT LIKE ANIME NEVER ACTUALLY GO OUTSIDE NOR TOUCH GRASS BECAUSE THEY ARE SO DETACHED FROM REALITY AND CAN ONLY SEE REAL PEOPLE FROM THEIR SHITTY BUTT GAY MONITORS ... I TOUCH GRASS NEARLY EVERY FRICKING DAY FOR SEVERAL HOURS IN FACT I WENT FOR A WALK AND I LIKE ANIME YOU STUPID FRICKING GORILLA JEWISH BIPOC you fat FRICK KEEP YOURSELF SAFE

SHOW MORE

Please celebrate with my by showering me with upmarseys only

Special thanks to the six nine people who went the extra mile in thanking me for their downmarseys by offering to get me help

Hello!, after seeing the request that Carp made I had to jump into action and make it! Vore is a fetish I am VERY familiar with and I was soooo happy with how this piece turned out!

I consulted some of my local furry friends who have the same fetish as well and worked 4 hours last night making this beautiful piece. Honestly, this is so hot that I was considering marking it nsfw!

Can you just imagine how AROUSED that animal inside Marsey's stomach must be, and how sexual climaxic those JIGGLES and BUMPING must feel to Marsey, oh how I wish I was one of those two!

Anyways if you ever want vore art of your fursona done all you have to do is contact me and we can work something out, I do LOVE all my furry friends!

that is all

trans lives matter

Thanks to @monkeystyle for making the janniecord leaks unreadable for a few hours! Fixed.

this concludes my marseyposting

love that cat

Hey My Preshies!

I juuoouuuuoooust wanted to lovingly let you know that your shitposts are being uber duper moderated and thrown into the appropriate trash cans they belong in!

"POOURRRRQUOI??" = C'est parce que c'est mal!!

OMG FUN!! I love you all so much and throwing your shit away in the trash can they belong in is such an honor. Thank you so much!! We love it!!

If you throw enough trash can shit away yourselves I might bless you with another anon POV blowjob video!

Love you. Please go frick yourselves.

Sincerely, The Jannies

House Furry and our resident ponylovers stand with rdrama in the bold fight against Stupidpol. As always, please remember to suggest images for next week below!

This week's furry-adjacent news has been dominated by Turning Red, which Firefox was advertising for some reason and which reviewers aren't allowed to dislike. I'm not sure what to make of it, but that's one ugly panda. So it goes.

It was a slow week for local furry drama, with only a few excellent longposts and a dramatic reveal/invasion of a top-secret groomercord server to tide us over until next week:

@CBD introduced us to the delightful world of cryptofascist Eastern Orthodox furries, which I'm sure you were all dying to know about.

@Pastel told us the tale of furries sexually harassing Old Spice on Twitter.

@Phoenixgoldfire found a bizarre and unsettling NSFW comic, as one does.

There was some sort of ghost award metadrama rumored to have ties to House Furry. Probably not worth looking into further

And, of course, there was some sort of metadrama dust-up involving alt accounts, top-secret groomercords, and intrigue that @TracingWoodgrains catalogued here and @Marshill added pictures to over here.

Don't forget, you share a site with us The infestation will continue until the fursecution stops.

@SomeGayFurry @Noctis @AltAccountUmbreon @FurryNationalism @ThreeLetterAgent @furrybussyhunter @Lycanroc @furry @TracingWoodgrains @DudeBussyLmao @carpathianflorist @kn0thing @of_blood_and_salt @Publiq @DerekSavageCoolCuck @SparkBrave @Gandalf @CBT @Nipsu @Greu @Corvus @Pastel @Phoenixgoldfire @AnFurryTwonk

everyone get in here

As always, if you want to be added to or removed from the ping, let me know, and remember to join us at rdrama's most dramatic hole, s/furry, where the fur and fun never stops

When the school shooter comes for you but then the neurodivergent kid communist Jew says reddit moment 420 69 and everyone says nice and it’s wholesome 100 Keane Reeves bob ross Steve Irwin Stefan Karl stefanson but then the Instagram normies say that tik Tok and fortnite are good and they like kpop so you beat them to death and then play minecraft but then 2020 has cornea virus and world war 3 and bushfires and flood because boomers are bad but then it’s your cake day and everyone needs to give you upvoted but no one gives you upvoted and you have no friends so you ask out your crush with baby yoda because baby yoda is wholesome but she says no but you then you sneak 100 and destruction 100 stonks and your post gets more than 7 upvoted and it gets to hot but someone is using light mode and they don’t sort by new or downvote ads so you kill them but then you realise that they hate cardi b and rap music but they like dubstep and anime music so you press F to pay respect and 69 other fellow redditors upvote you and then joker falls down the at airs and gets hit by a car and the feminists get triggered because you say that joker is now a girl because she has long hair and you hit a girl because equal rights equal fights and you post it in your sjw and triggered feminist freak out and getting rekt compilation v47 tumblr edition and then you post it in YouTube because Disney is bad but you buy Disney plus so you can see baby yoda and then you buy a baby yoda funko pop but then you see that there is life sized baby yoda so you waste your college funds on it but you blame it on the boomers because they made everything hard for you and the world is gonna end in 2030 because of global warming so you joking Greta thunberg and she ok boomers trump but then trump starts ww3 with Iran and you’re gonna get drafted so you John the Area 51 raid to be safe but then the HK protestors need your help you post frick China in reddit and the Chinese government stops oppressing them because reddit is epic and we always solve problems by posting about them, just like how we solved global warming and destruction 100d Nestle but then the you eat with a plastic straw and every redditor downvoted you but then they realise that Rocket Daddy will turn 69 on 4/20/69 so they say Nice abdnmakebit national nice day but then a cyber truck crashes into a building because you realised that the date is actually 9/11 so you subscribe to pewdiepie and tell the g*mers to rise up but then the mobile g*mers rise up so you start to beat them but then they play minecraft so it’s ok but then they also have fornite so you kill all of them because you’re all mad lads and your all mans if sheer fricking will and you donate to team trees to celeberate but it’s ended already but you make happiness noises because they reached 20 million but then you go on a crusade to take back to holy lands and then you get Bf Chungus and Ugandan buckles to join you but then the doctors see apples and they get scared so you get pewdiepies legs and he rates you big pp but then the quiet kid reaches for his bag but he accidentally takes Ahmed’s bag and then they bomb Japan and Pearl harbour and then your dad comes back 15 minutes later with the milk and he signs the divorce paper with your mom and they argue over who gets custody over you because neither of them want you and you’re the reason for their divorce but then Danny Doritos and shrek come rescue you and they take care of you and you get to browse reddit all day and it’s a happy wholesome 100 ending and then you post something on reddit and it gets a silver, gold and platinum but then a normie uses emojis in the comments so you call the emoji police and they get arrested epic style and then keena reaves comes and says wow that was a wholesome 100 moment and he says that you get what you fricking deserve and he calls you breathtaking and you realise he just did a speech 100 destruction 100 because that’s what heroes do but your normie friend double taps on a post and asks what’s so good about it so you say that you wouldn’t get it but then somebody reposts your meme and it gets to hot so you tell the reddit gang and they all downvote the post but then the teacher tells everybody to stay calm because the school is on fire and then the kid named calm does the funny mike wazowski face and you make into a meme on reddit but then the Alabama kid gets his sister pregnant and a kid says that he think Keane reeves isn’t wholesome and that minecraft isn’t good and that fortnite is better so you and your epic reddit hang send him death threats as a punishment for not being wholesome but then there’s baby yoda butbevwyone forgets about baby scooby and baby peanut and baby spongebob and bbaby gary and the ameriKKKans measure in football fields per hamburger because ameriKKKa is dumb and the floor is made out of floor and a minute passes in Africa and this is a tree because of the way it is and it’s illegal to be a criminal in Sweden and then pewdipie makes Swedish meatballs for everyone but then the fire alarm goes off and the special ed kids start dancing and then the people in the drug commercials are happy and the Oompa Loompas are dancing because a kid died and a footballer fell down so the cheerleaders are also dancing but then you do something that scares Satan and then somebody says we so it’s now communist 100 and all of the epic redditors are depressed and have no friends but that’s what makes us epic redditors but then you accidentally step on your dogs tail and he won’t forgive you but he’s a good boy and your cat is a floofe and a chonker but then you remember that vegans are bad and mark zucceberg is a lizard and then you teach the parrots at the pets store and little kids to say the n word and the f word and you run away and then the girls locker rooms are stupid and boring but the boys locker rooms are funny and quirky and then guacamole nibba peepee and the teacher has HIV and the girl with all A+ starts panicking and then the guy in the maths book buys 42069 watermelons and then there's boomer memes and millenial memes but gen z memes are the wackiest and stonks and helth and myoosic and then everyone liked that and then you shit in the school pottys

I am also gay now

• 6 feet tall, 22.6 BMI - woah

• #1 most subscribed user on rDrama.net, statistically the most beloved user

• head admin, heroically does it for free like a soup kitchen worker or volunteer firefighter

• kind and nurturing, friend to incels even besides rDrama users

• HIV negative, completely unpozzed neghole

• owns three (3) meteorites

• knows every word to most Avril and Britney tracks (pre-Britney Jean)

• once spent like six (6) hours walking around atl with a homeless guy

• loves dasha even in the face of insurmountable adversity

• consistently pins the best non-lawlz content charitably ensuring maximum visibility

• gets that dc bag even when you downvote him like the clowns you are

• also #1 on the awards leaderboard, incredible