Getting drunk and going out with friends tonight. Also going to some hipster restaurant where you can't make reservations so I have to line up at like 7pm pray that I get a table bros

Also I have an opportunity to get into commodity trading, is that r-slurred?

i'm the based illiterate juror #4

Very strange out of left-field update to make everyone suddenly a blob for no reason.

https://twitter.com/grummz/status/1780966754996629881

The @PokemonGoApp removed gender from all Pokemon Go! players yesterday

Thank God, finally we can just pick style, like it's written in the bible Can anyone confirm? I don't really trust Mark Kern for an even handed take, but…

https://twitter.com/grummz/status/1780987222835232771

GaymerX

The main GO subreddit is angry. Of all places, I expected reddit to be happy everyone is trans.

Please roll back this atrocious update.

Luckily, someone discovered the reason for this update:

So what was the reasoning for this update?

https://twitter.com/MxKestrel https://mxkestrel.com/inclusivity-diversity

HAHAAHAHAHA

Looks like they made people fat, too, which is something I saw people saying on /v/, but who knows. All that matters is they need you to see a theyfab crotch.

Pro tip: leaving small pokemon to defend gyms while wearing a skirt allows you to show off your crack

It's Beaver Time

Is this NSFW? Who knows, all that matters is it gives you vicarious gender euphoria

The entire GO subreddit is pooping on or making fun of the game, there's too much to post it all. From people posting how they're suddenly big chungus to becoming transwomen. You can even be Tyler1.

There is a largish thread on the main Pokemon sub, but most of them don't care and would rather post about making something with legos or whatever.

I feel like they made male models, and then said, well if we add boobs this will work for women too.

It's awful. There are no masculine faces in the game. And the “buff” physiques just give you boobs

What soy protein does to a MF.

God forbid a woman has shape […]

(OP)This!! I'm fine with adding more body types but don't take away this one!

Yes, I'm taking this out of context to mislead because it's funnier that way.

Let's take a look at the game's twitter…

Had to vote to see the tallies, so I stayed sigma centrist and said “mid.”

https://twitter.com/pokemongohubnet/status/1780727610160402621

The replies with people posting their abominations are great.

There's even more replies to their first announcement, so enjoy.

https://twitter.com/pokemongohubnet/status/1780703672743407854

An important message from us regarding the LittleBigPlanet servers and online features: pic.twitter.com/QLweKxvD3s

— Sackboy: A Big Adventure | LittleBigPlanet (@LittleBigPlanet) April 19, 2024

@slim404 that's… weird, honestly. I'm not any sort of agent. You can dislike me, but please don't defame me.

— Katherine Maher (@krmaher) March 13, 2016

https://twitter.com/krmaher/status/709156851435200516

Here's a post showing evidence of Katherine being a CIA agent or at least affiliated with the CIA in some form: https://wikipediasucks.co/forum/viewtopic.php?f=34&t=3101

https://theponzipapers.substack.com/p/i-have-set-myself-on-fire-outside

edit:

It was confirmed to be him. He posted up QR codes linking to the substack where he set himself on fire and he was holding up a sign saying trump and biden were engaged in a facist coup?

apparently he posted a lot on /r/stupidpol, and was a populist schizo.

this is really cool because he seemed to have a lil of every political ideology, so every single wingcuck can look at him and see the people who they dont like in him (just like i did). its kinda like a political rorschach test

!nonchuds get ready for the wave of chuds saying he was a biden simp

!neolibs get ready for the wave of wingcucks saying he was (insert political ideology here)

Is anyone surprised that Ilhan Omar’s daughter has the communist hammer and sickle on her profile?

She was arrested in front of Columbia University earlier today in connection with the unrest there. pic.twitter.com/t9Xu2pamHi

— Visegrád 24 (@visegrad24) April 18, 2024

(love that reddit has become a generic trademark for unfunny)

(TIL souls in the two lower heavens in Mormonism lose their genitals)

Columbia has DUMPED student belongings in a FUCKING. ALLEYWAY. pic.twitter.com/AlTsYH03nz

— *tired screaming* 🇵🇸 (@Ruth_Mensch) April 18, 2024

Part 1.

https://twitter.com/cybersebb/status/1781009396073419045

https://kiwifarms.st/threads/boykisser-r-littleboykisser-boykisser-community-groomercord-femboy-grooming-circles.182778/page-3#post-17697620

https://kiwifarms.st/threads/boykisser-r-littleboykisser-boykisser-community-groomercord-femboy-grooming-circles.182778/page-4#post-17699834

https://kiwifarms.st/threads/boykisser-r-littleboykisser-boykisser-community-groomercord-femboy-grooming-circles.182778/page-8#post-17718264

https://kiwifarms.st/threads/boykisser-r-littleboykisser-boykisser-community-groomercord-femboy-grooming-circles.182778/page-12#post-17770946

His posts on the 'Arms

!nooticers

Hey @bostonpolice maybe don’t break the law by parking in a bike lane?! There were legal parking spots nearby too. 😡@MassBike @CityOfBoston @carsNbikelane @bikelaneuprise @bostonbikeunion pic.twitter.com/iidsAk49Cy

— Maia E (@merp_slev) April 19, 2024

Physical traits I’d like in my future husband:

- Tall (5 foot 10+)
- Thick hair
- Thick beard
- Well groomed
- Straight teeth
- Goes gym (isn’t fat)
- Trains in MMA/Boxing (some sort of combat)
- Good dress sense

— Maisha | 🇧🇩🇵🇸 (@maishaislam03) April 18, 2024

>Tall

>5'10

Made me

But then I googled and

Its some literal sub 5 foot gremlin's standard of tall

It takes allah's intervention to get a 5'10 gymcel in bhangidesh

Pretty sure that sub has at least a couple documented suicides

you were not “fired” you quit after developing a wildly unprofessional parasocial relationship with an artist, who had to have her team intervene after you sent her 100s of text messages 👍🏾

and stop posting our emails asking people to “go stan mode” it’s beyond embarrassing 👍🏾👍🏾 https://t.co/C0RXiQ7Kj1

— vivian (@perlucidum) April 18, 2024

Top Drama

Relative Drama (takes into account the size of the subreddit)

autodrama: returning jobs to dramautists. Ping HeyMoon if there are any problems or you have a suggestion

Not even drama, just laugh at fricking fatties. Clearly can't share the photo but how the frick does a 10 y/o born of r*pe and put up for adoption prior to birth weigh more than an obese adult weighing 220 lbs call other people fatasses. Other fun story I was told was that during placement at his previous long term residential facility he called people BIPOCs because there was about a .1% chance his birth father was black therefore making him Afro-Mexican and got the shit kicked out of him from actual Afro people. Went into the wrong field for drama because that sounds way more hilarious.

the entire hole was either s or literal whores 🤣🤣🤣🤣femcel my butt neighbor

https://old.reddit.com/r/Grimdank/comments/1c7rjlr/this_my_headcanon_atlest_i_dont_know_about_you/?sort=controversial

Most Based Comments

Basedness: 🔥🔘🔘🔘🔘

Silly peasant! You're thinking of what's good for society rather than what's good for the haves! (100)

Stop joking. This is serious. (-13)

Basedness: 🔥🔘🔘🔘🔘

What could possibly be more valuable than educating the next generation? No, that value doesn't make itself known within a quarter, but having an educated populace pays dividends. Unless of course the ruling elite actually want a bunch of dumb slaves, which it certainly seems like they do. (440)

Teacher salaries are determined locally. Only 17 states have state-wide pay schedules for teachers, and those only specify minimums.Blaming a "ruling elite" when this is a local issue just makes you look unserious. (-14)

Basedness: 🔥🔘🔘🔘🔘

They were still teaching from home.  Pivoting to online learning was a learning process for everyone.  The teachers didn't frick over anyone.  Our frickin society did by not prioritizing good ventilation in buildings and universal healthcare and providing paid leave and leaving parents having to try to manage their remote learning students at the same time as full time jobs.  If you think online learning was bad wait for the impact of a spike of disabled people due to long COVID.   (13)

The teachers unions refused to work in 2021.  The online learning was bullshit and it negativity impacted poor kids who didn't have rich WFH parents to baby sit then.  My 3rd grader had online classes. Ridiculous (-13)

Angriest Comments

Angriness: 😡😡😡😡😡

The teachers unions refused to work in 2021.  The online learning was bullshit and it negativity impacted poor kids who didn't have rich WFH parents to baby sit then.  My 3rd grader had online classes. Ridiculous (-13)

While I agree that online learning isn't ideal for most age groups, neither is asking people to risk their lives and health because people send their sick kids to school because there is no mandated paid sick leave in the US. It would have been easier to return to in person learning if schools had upgraded their ventilation systems and installed air filtration, and legislation was passed to mandated that people are paid to stay home when they are sick or have sick children to care for (working from home if possible) Spreading disease does not increase productivity, and no one does a good job when they are hopped up on OTC drugs to keep themselves standing upright. This whole situation was a disaster of our own making, because people need money to pay bills, their employers do not pay them and they put their jobs at risk if they call out sick, and people who have children with no stay at home parent or nearby retired family or friends who are OK with watching sick kids (which pre c... (2)

Angriness: 😡😡😡😡😡

I know money doesn't grow on trees, but i made this same argument for police officers.If all of a sudden we said police officers in major cities will make, idk, 250k a year (for shits & gigs argument sake)... well heck, i bet all of a sudden we wouldn't have such a shortage. You'd create a ton of competition. Only the best of the best would graduate the academy, and you could hand pick the top candidates. You could weed out the pigs, the ones that shoot at acorns, or the tiny female that resorts to tazer'ing some big burly dude bc she knows she couldn't physically thwart potentially dangerous advances if it came to that. All of a sudden people aren't leaving an extremely dangerous job bc the money is good, so you can then train the next crop much better on dealing/interacting with all sorts of situations.But alas, once again, the money has to come from somewhere, even if it is for the people teaching our youth or the people will call for help. (5)

Police officer is less dangerous than pizza delivery. Cops are already very highly paid and well-protected for little education or skill. The butthole that murdered Daniel Shaver gets paid for the rest of his life because of the 'stress' he got... from murdering an unarmed kid lying on his stomach.I'm all for increasing pay, decreasing their responsibilities, as long as we also drastically reduce the size of departments and outsourcing the shit that doesn't require a dude with a badge and a gun to social workers and qualified individuals. Cops end up doing tons of shit that really doesn't need to fall on them. And mandatory bodycams, they reduce complaints two-fold, both false complaints, and real violations, because everyone knows it's being recorded. (11)

Angriness: 😡😡😡😡😡

What a fricking brain dead take! Teachers absolutely need to be paid more.It's not glorified babysitting. It's not liberal indoctrination.It's trying to get students to do the bare minimum needed to be a successful individual in this society. When parents don't help, when administrators always side with these same parents, and when society at large treats your job like a fricking joke. That's where the shitty brain dead takes come from.We need to be paid our fricking worth, BEFORE getting a masters degree! A fricking cashier at a Buc-ee's will be making more than a first and second year teacher before they earn their masters. A FRICKING CASHIER. Higher salaries will not cause inflation, where is the logic there anyway?! Pay teachers for their time, effort, compassion, and patience with dealing with the children Y'ALL failed to parent properly. It is not a teachers job to raise a kid, babysit them or even do more than just educate them! This take can only be made by someone who sees teach... (1)

Biggest Lolcow: /u/NotGalenNorAnsel

Score: 🐮🐮🐮🔘🔘

Number of comments: 9

Average angriness: 🔘🔘🔘🔘🔘

Maximum angriness: 😡😡😡😡😡

Minimum angriness: 🔘🔘🔘🔘🔘

NEW: Subscribe to /h/miners to see untapped drama veins, ripe for mining!

autodrama: automating away the jobs of dramautists. Ping HeyMoon if there are any problems or you have a suggestion

On this day in 1975, the Khmer Rouge liberated Kampuchea.

They defeated american imperialism without falling into the claws of soviet social-imperialism.

Despite the errors they made, we need to defend them against the lies of those who obliterated their country. pic.twitter.com/pd4AJMlcCp

— ka paul 📕 (@maoistnujabes) April 17, 2024