Puss In Boots: The Last Wish (2023) is the second animated movie spin-off of the decrepit and overmilked Dreamworks series Shrek, set in a fantasy land where fairy tales and nursery rhymes are real but Spain still exists. It stars Puss, the swashbuckling adorable feline Zorro the masked swordsman, a side character from Shrek 2. Aside from the titular character, almost no characters from the Shrek series are present in this movie.
Sadly, Puss in Boots, the undaunted Spanish lover and hero, is now down to the last of his nine lives, a decade after the events of Puss in Boots (2011). And as if that weren't enough, the unstoppable bounty hunter known as The Big Bad Wolf is after him. To restore all of his precious lives and escape an inglorious fate, Puss must pluck up his courage to embark on a dangerous quest into the Dark Forest to find the legendary Wishing Star. However, Puss isn't the only one seeking the map to the magical star. As the daring outlaw puts his skills to good use to stay one step ahead of formidable adversaries determined to get their hands on it, a crucial question arises: Does he have what it takes to face his most skilled and terrifying opponent and get his life back on track?
Puss and his companions, an unnamed mangy mutt and cat burglar Kitty Softpaw must go on an adventure that is structured suspiciously similar to a Dora The Explorer episode to reach their ultimate prize. They are pursued by the bounty hunters Goldilocks and the Three Bears, the ruthless kingpin Big Jack Horner and The Big Bad Wolf, a wraith like figure that reminds Puss of his own mortality. The pacing of the movie is closer to that of an action adventure than a comedy and there isn't much of the topical humor associated with the Shrek franchise.
The action scenes are fantastic and incredibly well animated, shifting from conventional 3d graphics to a more stylized low framerate hand drawn effect, similar to the well received Into The Spiderverse movie. I liked that the movie has a bit of PG-rated mean spiritedness, with many bad guys getting owned and eating shit in painful ways. The writing is remarkably tight for a childrens movie, and the characters are likeable without being annoying. Our main characters have arcs that are resolved satisfyingly in as basic of a hero's journey plot as it could possibly get.
Like the actually good Shrek movies, there are a lot of small details that made me laugh like a small cameo by the walking broomstick from the Disney classic Magician's Apprentice, many homages to Sergio Leone and literal mexican standoff. This is definitely one of those movies where the animators enjoyed cramming every scene with easter eggs.
I expected a lot worse, but Puss In Boots: The Last Wish was actually very enjoyable, even for adults who aren't Dreamworks or Shrek fans. There's nothing annoying or gross in it, it's just a solid film that's fun for the whole family.
Yeah, 5/5 for a perfectly adequate kids movie. I might be biased because there aren't a lot of non-capeshit options this decade. Also, orange cats are just cute.
Most of the outrage is in the quote tweets.
Foot dirt going everywhere on the bed counts as seasoning during throuple sex:
Blacks prove to be able to handle noticing better than sexy Indian dudes:
Failure to domesticate two bitches in a throuple means the moid is being dommed:
If you aren't Michael Jordan level black you're a mayo:
I initially laughed at the idea of a CIA earthquake gun but then I used my gigantic brain and thought for a second and came to the conclusion that with some kind of drilling device (which doesn't dig a tunnel but just displaces dirt and digs deep) and a hydrogen bomb it might actually be possible to artificially create an earthquake.
Turkey has been being a bit of a BIPOC recently by blocking glorious NATO expansion but now suddenly they are going to need to get on their knees for that aid money due to this "natural" disaster
Quite the coincidence
go to any pilates class where membership is entirely female and gay and notice how tiny the outfits and how many the mirrors
Being a moid should count as a mental disability due to fails like this:
If moids were willing to blind themselves we could get women dressing hotter:
I love this discourse cause I work at a women’s gym and the members are much more likely to express themselves through cute/flattering clothes because they feel safe and empowered to wear what makes them feel good. Clothes are fun and so is feeling hot. Men usually ruin it for us
Foidery means looking at yourself is like intercourse but moids looking is literally rape:
They are not the same person but that neighbor can cook.
A convicted killer believed to belong to one of Italy’s most powerful mafia organisations has been discovered working as a pizza chef and arrested after nearly 17 years on the run.
Edgardo Greco, 63, is suspected of belonging to the notorious ’Ndrangheta, a mafia organisation in Calabria, southern Italy. Interpol said he was arrested on Thursday in the French city of Saint-Etienne, where he had at one point run an Italian restaurant under an alias, according to French prosecutors.
- maggotz: oh frick off you are not doing this again to me :(
Not all of the sexual climaxs involved a toy, and not all sexual climaxs involving a toy were solo. I am happily married, my husband is represented in this data multiple times, and people are welcome to interpret the ratios, methods, and frequency as they like. The focus of this project is my own self observation, any granular information regarding partners is deliberately left out, because that is not the focus.
don't click on her profile bros
During the State of the Union address Tuesday night, President Joe Biden could announce that U.S. scientists have found a cure for cancer and, within hours, Fox News pundits would be saying: "Great. Now patriotic cancer doctors will lose their careers to Biden's relentless political ambitions."
Biden and ameriKKKa are both far from perfect, but the president has ample accomplishments to crow about: The unemployment rate fell to 3.4% in January, the lowest it has been since 1969; inflation, while still high, has been easing; and his party performed historically well in the midterm elections.
But in the right-wing media "Land of You-Will-Believe, Because We'll Say It Over and Over and Over Again," Biden is, in no particular order: an illegitimate president; the most radical president ameriKKKa has ever had; dementia-addled and incapable of completing a sentence; a criminal mastermind who has duped the ameriKKKan people and every level of U.S. law enforcement; effectively dead, but controlled, "Weekend at Bernie's"-style, by Vice President Kamala Harris; weak; tyrannical; inept; and devious.
Nothing Biden says in State of the Union address will matter to those who hate him
He could stand before Congress and announce a plan to cut corporate taxes, mandate prayer in schools and name every airport in ameriKKKa after Ronald Reagan and it would do nothing to shake conservatives' conspiratorial construct that every move he makes is a demonic blend of evil and nefariousness.
So my question is: Why bother? Why not go "Dark Brandon" and just trot up to the podium -- or better yet, have someone push him up there in a wheelchair -- for the big speech and give the Fox News/Newsmax/OANN/PatriotBlatherBlog (I might've made that last one up) people what they want?
It would make their lives easier, and the rest of us would probably enjoy it more than the usual State of the Union Pablum.
Here's a draft speech I worked up, free of charge:
A State of the Union address to the Fox News crowd
Mister Speaker, Madam Vice President, and our first lady and second gentleman, members of Congress and the Cabinet, justices of the Supreme Court, ghosts of Karl Marx and Vladimir Lenin and members of the cannibalistic global cabal that I lead: Good evening. You all look delicious.
On this night, I've come to report to you that the State of the Union is ... WOKE AS (EXPLETIVE)!
That's right, in the past year, we have made great progress on our mission to transform ameriKKKa into a genderless, vegan nation grounded in socialism and a firm belief that there is no god.
In just the past six months, for example, our elite social justice warriors have surreptitiously inserted critical race theory into more than 95% of the nation's Bibles while also transmitting subliminal lessons on gender identity to the iPads and iPhones used by 67% of U.S. children under the age of 10.
At the direction of my supervisors, Barack Obama and George Soros, my administration has taken steps to mandate that every sporting event halftime show feature drag queens – sorry about the Super Bowl gig, Rihanna – and meat will be outlawed by no later than March of this year, along with gas stoves and guns.
As you can see, I’m reading tonight’s speech from a laptop computer. This one belongs to my son, Hunter Biden, and it does, in fact, contain a large file labeled “Biden Crime Family Dirty Dealings.” I’m sure you’d love to get your hands on it, but you can’t, because it’s where I keep my plan to ban Christmas and make religion illegal.
(Pause for a full two minutes, staring blankly into space.)
Where am I? Are my pancakes here yet?
Whoops. Sorry, sometimes I go a little blank for a spell. It's just the ol' dementia acting up. Nothing the blood of a few young conservatives who were victims of "cancel culture" can't fix.
(Take sip from glass of red liquid.)
Anyhoo, next month I'll be dissolving the military because I hate ameriKKKa. Oh, and that Chinese spy balloon that was floating across the country over the weekend? That actually belonged to Bill Gates. He was using it to activate the chips he implanted in everyone via the COVID-19 vaccine.
Don't worry, you won't feel a thing as you're being enslaved and forced to work the soy fields.
it actually sounds realistic
Like if you took the 4chan community and had them give you group answers about foid behaviors and thought processes they can get you the correct answer to a T that perfectly matches every single time out in the wild.
However, these same channers, even the fit or competent ones, are terrible at wooing or attracting foids in real life.
So like, what's up with that?
Is it because one part of mating success is always going to be ones inability to read people perfectly?
Or is it that foids are hyper successful at detecting even the weakest signs of autism and rejecting them?
And if it's number two. Then is it correct to say that foids are by design anti development as they instinctually hold genius autists in disdain?
- RichEvansOnlyfans: Based
So it seems the loving and liberal sanctuary-city of New York cries out "frick off, we're full!" when pushed to put up or shut up.
They're now putting a bunch of the undocumented onto free buses and shipping them northward to upstate New York coincidentally right by the notorious Roxham Road unguarded entry into Quebec that's used by especially sneaky asylum seekers to gain entry into Canada by bypassing official secured border points.
Curiously enough, busing undocumented immigrants was recently decried as being a crime against humanity when it was done by Florida and Texas but apparently now it's "different" when NYC is doing it.
Canucks react to the news of undocumented immigrants with irregularly funded bus tickets:
If Canada bussed Islamists to that border, the USA would freak the F out and shut it down.
Why do we even have a border? at this point it just seems like a waste of tax payers money. Honestly... just fricking make us a new US state at this point. Its fricking pathetic what this country has turned into. its going to happen eventually anyways with climate change and water becoming scarce. Might as well make it sooner so we can get paid in USD and get paid more.
YES PLEASE. This guy is on to something.
This is ridiculous. I get Texas passing on the problem to the states that aren’t carrying their weight. But the US can’t pass this onto Canada. We don’t have housing or affordable food for our own population.
At least in the US they can use illegals to farm, work under the table and build housing. In Canada we just give them handouts and put them in hotels. We can’t afford this anymore until we sell our oil
I too have considered tearing up my passport and coming in as a refugee it's a cush ride.
Great. Just keep adding to the housing and healthcare crises. The government won't do a frickin' thing about it.
This is the biggest issue tbh, nobody can buy a house for less than like 600k here and we have no doctors. I'm sure refugees won't have to worry about this though I'm sure Justin will find houses and doctors for them.
Anyway, come on in guys!