Once upon a time, there were four “Chads” with generic tragic backstories whose fate brought them together to save the world from a drunk Irish who kept harassing the women for nudes.

“Chad” one: Dramatictuna

Gender: male 🚹 Sexuality: flexible Strength: private, observant Weakness: bad music taste, salmon Special ability: boring enemies to death with 4/4 beats Star sign: Taurus Tragic back story: born in Canada

“Chad” two: Born Again Fred

Gender: male 🚹 Sexuality: farm stuff Strength: strong, handy, can communicate with farm animals Weakness: lightening, sheep Special ability: can summon goats at will Star sign: Capricorn Tragic back story: a young body shoved into saving his village by farming goats

“Chad” three: GoesDownOnWoman

Gender: male 🚹 Sexuality: aroused by chins Strength: selfie skills, photoshop skills, smoldering with duck face Weakness: not being able to admit HIL is funny Special ability: protects teammates by putting them under his chin and shielding them from sunlight Star sign: Sagittarius Tragic back story: tries so hard to look sexy but has never succeeded

“Chad” four: PostBussy

Gender: male 🚹 Sexuality: bussy Strength: Asian, coding Weakness: gussy, jannie, athletic Asian girls Special ability: gender swapping Star sign: Leo Tragic back story: jungle Asian looks

VS

The Drunk Irish: Eleven4For20

Gender: male 🚹 Sexuality: anything with holes Strength: Drinking, doing drugs Weakness: manlet, mayo trash Special ability: LARP Star sign: Cancer Tragic back story: wants nudes but never gets to have them