Hi /u/POST_BUSSY

My name is HardIsLife. You remind me a lot of myself when I was in college. I'm 31 now. I'm a programmer, too. I love my job. I love my colleagues. I love playing video games. I don't have many friends, but the ones I have are really awesome. I'm very happily married. Most importantly, I love myself and I accept myself.

And learning to accept myself was really hard after years of trying to "fit in" during college. I was sucked into this awful toxic way of seeing the world and myself. I was always trying to be someone I wasn't because I thought that was how I had to be. I thought I had to wear makeup every day. I thought I had to be feminine and girly. I thought I had to be super social. I thought I had to be nice and demure. I thought people didn't like me because I wasn't any of these things. I was wrong. People didn't like me because I didn't like myself. I thought I was deficient and broken.

All the people I spent time with were just as insecure and bitchy as me. I constantly felt like something was wrong with me. I felt so alone. The more lonely I became the harder it was to find the connections I desperately wanted. It made me judgemental and mean. I did things and treated people in ways I'm ashamed of. I had a lot of questions about my value as a person and whether I was worth being loved or worth living at all.

So, I want you to know that everything will be okay. You will be happy one day. you can talk to me. I won't judge you. I won't shame you. I won't pressure you. I simply want you to know that you aren't alone. I understand everything that you're feeling. I know exposing all your deepest secrets and fears is terrifying.

And if you're wondering who this crazy lady is and why I would want to help you, it's because I found people throughout my life that supported me. Who helped me realize I could be more and have more. I'm happy now because of them. I want to help others be happy too.

Seriously, PM me anytime <3