People enjoy the lockdown because it means they're finally good at something (staying inside and being a loser), and can act all high and mighty toward others. That's the reason the kEeP tHe LoCkDoWn tIl cHrIsTmAs 2022 voice is so amplified on reddit.
Karen literally demanded a haircut on TV. Really makes you wonder what type of distorted cartoon world you see when you spend your life addicted to opioids.
Inheritance-cel and you hoard on to the money because if you ever spend it, it’ll be as if she’s completely gone. Edit-nothing personal just felt like guessing
They make fun of Mormons and look who’s laughing now. Our priests told us at minimum one year. All my shitty frozen food is not going to waste! My three wives and I have enough to add another wife to my marriage.
Can't wait for you Whitehorsecels to save the Constitution when it's hanging by a thread so that Jesus can return to convert America's government into a Kingdom.
As a Mormon you are obligated to share your food with anyone who needs it. Food party at eagles house, yall! If you want a mtn dew or Pepsi you'll have to sneak out back, though, because caffeine is basically Crack to a Mormon.
Don’t worry we’ll have one of our pastors take you out back once one of them smells any of that devil fluid. You are allowed to buy one of our state’s wonderful beers at 3.2 ABV and enjoy it in your car as a pregame. Being your wives and kids! We will retell the story of Jospeh Smith and his magic stones by the campfire. If we’re lucky we will get far enough into the holy book to read about why God has every different colored. My youngest of 8 boys will be home and tell us about his missionary work in Mexico. Just another great family gathering in the beautiful state of Utah.
We might be one letter away from "moron," but we know that nearly everyone in the USA is an alcoholic. We understand you need to drink regularly. We'll just passively cure you through our stories of Brigham Young.
Or better yet, start an OnlyFans. Sex work is real work and you’ll earn more than you would on unemployment. What do you mean nobody wants to see a naked middle aged man? Clearly you just aren’t trying hard enough.
dude no one wants to see a naked 20 something woman the way that site's getting flooded right now. only so many internet dudes with disposable income to commission internet porn out there.
That'll be gone very soon too. Nothing says buyers regret when you're eating ramen (for the foreseeable future) and thinking about that $50 tip you gave and just how much you could buy with it now.
I'm probably in the income bracket to drop 50$ to have a random girl half my age to shove 80 sharpies up her ass, and I can't get into it. That's not even like an income stretch thing though.
To give you a picture of it I spent 30 on lunch today, because I'm still a wagie and standup's at 11 with a deployment at 2:59 for a presentation. To get a fucking awful cuban sandwich from a block away delivered. I think I tipped delivery muhammed 3$ of that to take a sip of my coffee too; insha allah I suppose(seal was broken with 2cm empty, his name was literally actually muhammed).
Maybe because you sound like you can actually have a meaningful nonfinancial relationship with a foid. Watch out ordering ethnic food that is delivered by a completely different ethnicity btw. Also most of their names are Muhammed
doordash, about 10 was base delivery fee, tip and tax. to give you an idea 2k rent for a 1 br appartment is living like a poor with bad hvac territory here.
I think these people protesting in large groups to re-open everything are kind of idiots. I think the people on reddit acting like they are only protesting so they can get a hair cut or go to red lobster are bigger idiots. There are entirely legitimate and understandable reasons these people want things open. They aren't risking their lives for a fucking haircut.
Funny enough this is true. America's welfare is fucked, and it shows during this time. In Australia, the government are literally paying us $600 a week to be NEETs. It's fucking based.
Aside from my face getting sweaty from the mandatory masks, my life is easy as fuck right now. Unemployment took minutes to file once the internet traffic slowed, I got my Trump Change within hours of asking for it, and all the worst people are afraid to leave the their homes, so traffic is really orderly. This is still a bunch of weak-ass, coward shit though. 250k isn't a lot of people for a so-called plague that's had significantly more contact with the world than any other.
How does it feel knowing that you have to work while office drone bill who made 4x your weekly pay at the least is sitting at home drawing unemployment to the max plus the 600 extra a week federal ? Tell is Mr fry cook how's that feel!??!?
127 comments
1 AutoModerator 2020-05-12
Heh. Some of you Deuxcels are alright. Don't come to DeuxCHAT tomorrow.
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21 Swarmcap 2020-05-12
redditcels feel like heroes for doing what they've been doing for decades
44 BlackFang4 2020-05-12
Okay lol I'm so quirky but hear me out... DAE (does anyone else) NOT feel a difference during quarantine lol?! I'm so introverted! Like if you agree!
17 BlackFang4 2020-05-12
Take my poor man's gold 😭😭🖕🖕🖕🖕
12 Mayos_side 2020-05-12
Check it out I recreated minecraft textures in animal crossing.
28 Lifting_Sexytimes 2020-05-12
People enjoy the lockdown because it means they're finally good at something (staying inside and being a loser), and can act all high and mighty toward others. That's the reason the kEeP tHe LoCkDoWn tIl cHrIsTmAs 2022 voice is so amplified on reddit.
10 WeAreLostSoAreYou 2020-05-12
Learn to code and stop complaining you can’t go outside sweaty
1 ThouzandQueerReich 2020-05-12
Imagine not having a back yard.
2 VzrokDaJeJansaZmagov 2020-05-12
Do you even know what sub you're on ? 😂
26 Lifting_Sexytimes 2020-05-12
This sub is the only reason I still use this fucking awful website
6 VzrokDaJeJansaZmagov 2020-05-12
Kinda cute anon, and honestly same. Feels good to have a subreddit where you can not act retarded and not get deleted by the evil jannies :-)
7 NotClothed 2020-05-12
"Act" lol
2 4thebadbone 2020-05-12
“Ironic” racism
Bitch I’m for real
2 gonight 2020-05-12
lmao dilate
1 Ikbenaanhetwerkhoor 2020-05-12
GAS! GAS!
1 VzrokDaJeJansaZmagov 2020-05-12
Yea haha
12 BalkanPartisan 2020-05-12
Karen literally demanded a haircut on TV. Really makes you wonder what type of distorted cartoon world you see when you spend your life addicted to opioids.
16 slapdaddybaddy 2020-05-12
Imagine thinking everything the teevee tells you is real lmao
1 creutz17 2020-05-12
*anything
5 KangofHoteps 2020-05-12
That Xanax and Chardonnay mix got Karen wildin’
2 hashtagrealaccount 2020-05-12
There's nothing cartoony about the world of an opiod addict. Not that I'd know or anything. Shut up.
11 OnAllDAY 2020-05-12
That's what people get for having no savings.
17 JohnDickCockerfeller 2020-05-12
Nigga, you have unlimited savings?
9 DeTobiasch 2020-05-12
Imagine not having at least a year of living money in savings. It's truly over for poorcels
7 ObsiArmyBest 2020-05-12
I'm at 3 years of savings right now. Keep up
13 Legio-Sicilia 2020-05-12
Well when mom only makes you pay for the internet and your WoW subscription how can you not have a couple years savings.
4 ObsiArmyBest 2020-05-12
I'm in my 30s and my mom is dead. Try again.
5 Da_Triple_Truth_Ruth 2020-05-12
Inheritance-cel and you hoard on to the money because if you ever spend it, it’ll be as if she’s completely gone. Edit-nothing personal just felt like guessing
1 ObsiArmyBest 2020-05-12
Zero inheritance since my dad is still alive and the money is in his name and I don't rely on him for money
2 Legio-Sicilia 2020-05-12
Living with your dead mom isn’t better. You know your gonna have to pay social security back when they find out right.
1 ObsiArmyBest 2020-05-12
I haven't lived with my parents since I was 13
1 [deleted] 2020-05-12
[deleted]
1 hashtagrealaccount 2020-05-12
Imagine replying to something in the sub seriously. I'm so embarrassed for you.
1 ObsiArmyBest 2020-05-12
Imagine thinking a "my mom is dead" reply is real.
2 hashtagrealaccount 2020-05-12
Dead parents are no joking matter, dick. My parents died before I was born ok. You've been reported.
3 SpezKILLSSwartz 2020-05-12
I reported your report, checkmate nerd
1 aj_thenoob 2020-05-12
If you're younger it's impossible without parental help, though. But if you're 26 and don't have a few months savings that's a problem.
1 ManBearFridge 2020-05-12
Lmao it's only been two months
Sell your "collector figures"
1 texanapocalypse33 2020-05-12
Yes
11 United_States_Eagle 2020-05-12
They make fun of Mormons and look who’s laughing now. Our priests told us at minimum one year. All my shitty frozen food is not going to waste! My three wives and I have enough to add another wife to my marriage.
2 AnotherClosetAtheist 2020-05-12
Can't wait for you Whitehorsecels to save the Constitution when it's hanging by a thread so that Jesus can return to convert America's government into a Kingdom.
1 hashtagrealaccount 2020-05-12
As a Mormon you are obligated to share your food with anyone who needs it. Food party at eagles house, yall! If you want a mtn dew or Pepsi you'll have to sneak out back, though, because caffeine is basically Crack to a Mormon.
2 United_States_Eagle 2020-05-12
Don’t worry we’ll have one of our pastors take you out back once one of them smells any of that devil fluid. You are allowed to buy one of our state’s wonderful beers at 3.2 ABV and enjoy it in your car as a pregame. Being your wives and kids! We will retell the story of Jospeh Smith and his magic stones by the campfire. If we’re lucky we will get far enough into the holy book to read about why God has every different colored. My youngest of 8 boys will be home and tell us about his missionary work in Mexico. Just another great family gathering in the beautiful state of Utah.
2 hashtagrealaccount 2020-05-12
Beer? So yer just a FAKE MORMON!
1 United_States_Eagle 2020-05-12
We might be one letter away from "moron," but we know that nearly everyone in the USA is an alcoholic. We understand you need to drink regularly. We'll just passively cure you through our stories of Brigham Young.
10 muchomasturbations 2020-05-12
STAY HOME AND PLAY VIDEO GAMES POOR PERSON WHO DOESN"T HAVE DISPOSABLE INCOME FOR A GAMING RIG
6 FloatyFish 2020-05-12
Or better yet, start an OnlyFans. Sex work is real work and you’ll earn more than you would on unemployment. What do you mean nobody wants to see a naked middle aged man? Clearly you just aren’t trying hard enough.
22 squishles 2020-05-12
dude no one wants to see a naked 20 something woman the way that site's getting flooded right now. only so many internet dudes with disposable income to commission internet porn out there.
18 wizdumb337 2020-05-12
That'll be gone very soon too. Nothing says buyers regret when you're eating ramen (for the foreseeable future) and thinking about that $50 tip you gave and just how much you could buy with it now.
8 squishles 2020-05-12
I'm probably in the income bracket to drop 50$ to have a random girl half my age to shove 80 sharpies up her ass, and I can't get into it. That's not even like an income stretch thing though.
To give you a picture of it I spent 30 on lunch today, because I'm still a wagie and standup's at 11 with a deployment at 2:59 for a presentation. To get a fucking awful cuban sandwich from a block away delivered. I think I tipped delivery muhammed 3$ of that to take a sip of my coffee too; insha allah I suppose(seal was broken with 2cm empty, his name was literally actually muhammed).
That was still more satisfying than onlyfans.
9 wizdumb337 2020-05-12
Maybe because you sound like you can actually have a meaningful nonfinancial relationship with a foid. Watch out ordering ethnic food that is delivered by a completely different ethnicity btw. Also most of their names are Muhammed
4 Somenakedguy 2020-05-12
Where tf do you live that you paid 30 for a sandwich delivered?
I’m in Manhattan and even when I splurge on seamless it’s usually less than that if it’s just me
4 squishles 2020-05-12
doordash, about 10 was base delivery fee, tip and tax. to give you an idea 2k rent for a 1 br appartment is living like a poor with bad hvac territory here.
edit had to check it was doordash
9 toomanytabsopen 2020-05-12
If doordash is anything like Uber your sandwich was probably raped
2 squishles 2020-05-12
I actually picked it because I'd gotten a sandwich rape on uber eats.
money ain't what they told me man. should've just stuck to itlalians, can tell if a pizza's been bitten out of and they don't fuck around.
1 gerradp 2020-05-12
Itlalians? Should have just stuck to remedial English and brain medicine
1 texanapocalypse33 2020-05-12
Gayest post of the week.
1 TheLordHighExecu 2020-05-12
yes
1 TimGuoRen 2020-05-12
If you ever call your PC a gaming rig, you have failed in life.
0 Bewbman 2020-05-12
You're lucky I take the no downvote rule seriously. Otherwise you'd have it!
1 TimGuoRen 2020-05-12
I take it seriously, too: Your comment contributed nothing to the discussion, I downvote it.
Also, my comment is absolutely correct. I would downvote you a second time for disagreeing.
And I would downvote you a third time for even mentioning the no downvote rule.
1 Bewbman 2020-05-12
You are a disgrace to the Ummah.
1 TimGuoRen 2020-05-12
You have a GAMING RIG. lmao
9 DownvoterAccount 2020-05-12
Poors should unironically go broke to realize the problem was jews all along.
15 Bummunism 2020-05-12
Accelerationpilled
2 AutoModerator 2020-05-12
😏
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9 ESSE_Leviathan 2020-05-12
The problem is not people of different beliefs or races. It’s poor people
3 hashtagrealaccount 2020-05-12
And coloreds. Don't forget the coloreds.
4 ManBearFridge 2020-05-12
He said poors 😒
2 hashtagrealaccount 2020-05-12
Touche
5 AutoModerator 2020-05-12
feet
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6 Fulgrim_Deciever 2020-05-12
I am wagie..
I RAGIE!!!!!!!!
6 Love-Sex-Dreamz 2020-05-12
Learn2Code and trade bitcoin, poorcels.
2 low-info-upvoter 2020-05-12
Anybody who can throw coal into a furnace can learn how to program
- Dementia daddy
4 thetinguy 2020-05-12
lol at all the poorcels malding. it never even began for you.
1 forseti911 2020-05-12
We're hitting levels of rightoid poorcel cope previous not thought possible.
But I agree with them in this case boomercide and fattycide now!
4 hashtagrealaccount 2020-05-12
I think these people protesting in large groups to re-open everything are kind of idiots. I think the people on reddit acting like they are only protesting so they can get a hair cut or go to red lobster are bigger idiots. There are entirely legitimate and understandable reasons these people want things open. They aren't risking their lives for a fucking haircut.
4 kermit_was_wrong 2020-05-12
Almost as if a social safety net is useful when shit hits the fan and you’re in tough circumstances for outside reasons.
2 -holier-than-mao- 2020-05-12
Opinion disregarded.
1 kermit_was_wrong 2020-05-12
o no
3 demotecontrol 2020-05-12
As a neolib, I don't hate the global poor, just the Ameri-poors.
6 MikeStoklasa-cel 2020-05-12
Unfathomably based fellow neolib-cels. Rurals are truly subhuman
1 TheLordHighExecu 2020-05-12
2/3 of the UK farming economy comes from the government. It's basically a historical preservation program
3 hashtagrealaccount 2020-05-12
As a neoconlibthiest I'm not sure what I'm supposed to hate.
3 AnotherLibtardRekt 2020-05-12
Anyone but Israel
1 AutoModerator 2020-05-12
sentient
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3 artemis_m_oswald 2020-05-12
The right whines that there's too much welfare for unemployed ppl so why are they crying now? Enjoy the welfare poors
2 knuckledowntown 2020-05-12
Funny enough this is true. America's welfare is fucked, and it shows during this time. In Australia, the government are literally paying us $600 a week to be NEETs. It's fucking based.
1 SamManilla 2020-05-12
Aside from my face getting sweaty from the mandatory masks, my life is easy as fuck right now. Unemployment took minutes to file once the internet traffic slowed, I got my Trump Change within hours of asking for it, and all the worst people are afraid to leave the their homes, so traffic is really orderly. This is still a bunch of weak-ass, coward shit though. 250k isn't a lot of people for a so-called plague that's had significantly more contact with the world than any other.
5 MikeStoklasa-cel 2020-05-12
🤣🤣🤣🤣
3 SamManilla 2020-05-12
If I'm happy to be unemployed, and you're laughing about it, we have nothing but gains. Wholesome thread 100%
5 MikeStoklasa-cel 2020-05-12
Based beyond understanding
1 texanapocalypse33 2020-05-12
Wholesome deuxchads 🤗
1 [deleted] 2020-05-12
[deleted]
1 Harambememes69 2020-05-12
What's 250k?
1 SamManilla 2020-05-12
That's what I said. In ww1, a quarter million people would day in a day, yet we tried to violate social distancing daily.
1 ManBearFridge 2020-05-12
It's over for wage cucks
1 GameUpBoyHustleHardr 2020-05-12
well /u/professorshillphd ?
1 wrimples 2020-05-12
DeuxKaren
1 istural 2020-05-12
Once again, remind me why I give a fuck about unemployedcels?
1 whiteypoints 2020-05-12
Lol wut. Is America still shut down over that corona thing?
roflmao losers.
1 BoxofMistakes 2020-05-12
Jogga what?
1 thowaway_throwaway 2020-05-12
SOCIAL DISTANCING GOES BRRRRRRRRR
1 adhamrlf 2020-05-12
shouldn't they be protesting not getting the stimulus checks rather than not working?
1 AutoModerator 2020-05-12
wat
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-1 Chicken_____Man 2020-05-12
Imagine not being an essential worker... kinda cringe ngl
10 MikeStoklasa-cel 2020-05-12
Have fun dying LMFAOOOO 🤣🤣🤣🤣
4 Chicken_____Man 2020-05-12
Well I have to get the Amerifats their burgers
7 wizdumb337 2020-05-12
How does it feel knowing that you have to work while office drone bill who made 4x your weekly pay at the least is sitting at home drawing unemployment to the max plus the 600 extra a week federal ? Tell is Mr fry cook how's that feel!??!?
1 [deleted] 2020-05-12
[deleted]
4 AutoModerator 2020-05-12
mayo
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7 Chicken_____Man 2020-05-12
I just said I don't flip burgers, stop telling me what toppings you want
2 wizdumb337 2020-05-12
Sure ya are buddy. Don't forget to leave off the onions
1 MadMaxMercer 2020-05-12
Lol I make $967 a week sitting at home right now.
2 SmokinRussian 2020-05-12
You're a literal pussy.
3 MikeStoklasa-cel 2020-05-12
Seethe
3 SmokinRussian 2020-05-12
Must suck to have a compromised immune system. Is it diabetes or obesity?
3 MikeStoklasa-cel 2020-05-12
Both
1 andthendirksaid 2020-05-12
We must find a cure for diabesity
5 goblincocksmoker 2020-05-12
if you are an essential worker you probably have a low tier job
2 toomanytabsopen 2020-05-12
I make 6 figures to travel all over my state
1 [deleted] 2020-05-12
[deleted]
2 kermit_was_wrong 2020-05-12
Nah, banks are essentials, for example - everyone just works from home.
3 AutoModerator 2020-05-12
k
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1 LoliIsArt 2020-05-12
Yes I’m imagining, it’s called wage slavery. Also it’s half past 9, NO GET BACK IN CAGIE
1 _NoHype 2020-05-12
No joke I got paid more from unemployment insurance than I would have working full time in the past month
All thanks to the gym I worked at closing