"Get the sand out of your vagina. I like bottled water..." "Buy a filter and reusable bottle you selfish moron." "You should post a picture. I’d love to see a douche drinking bottled water." "Don’t you have a WoW guild to get to, virgin?"
"I’m OK with telling people that it’s probably not worth it to drink bottled water exclusively. But not to drink it at all? Seriously?" "Come on, stop being such a self-righteous asshole and prove to us how you’re better." "Wash your water bottles better you fucking idiot. Or don’t, I’m fine with you dying."
"I’m a liberal, but I don’t agree with you." "Awwww whosa cwying into their NPR totebag? I’m waaaay to the left of you, dumbass. You’re conservative as shit and you have the persecution complex to prove it."
"You can’t tell me what to do. Canned water tastes like crap." "You type really well for a toddler."
Bonus Top Mind: "FYI, the Department of Health & Human Services recently (less than a month ago) reduced the amount of fluoride that is recommended in water supplies because, it has, wait for it, damaged teeth, among other things that I won’t bother with."
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