I figured I'd write out something of a summary of Vordrak vs Kiwi Farms since it's quite possibly the maddest I've ever seen anyone get on the internet. It includes a seven month retard-feud, an entire school district being shut down after a terrorism hoax, a £10,000 lawsuit for hurt feelings, a £5,000 bounty on yours truly, and the typical swatting/doxing/mean words type of fare you usualy see in an internet drama.

For those who don't know, the kiwi farms are an 'internet culture gossip' forum that began as a Chris-Chan discussion forum and discusses/archives/mocks the internet lives of unusual weirdos on the internet. I've heard some subreddits are iffy about linking directly there due to the open hosting of dox, but you can find it easily enough through google.

Vordrak, who goes by the pen name Matthew Hopkins the Witchfinder, as well as openly going by his real name Samuel Collingwood Smith, is a Britsh ex-councilman, blogger, and obsessive gamergater and wikisperg. You might know him as the guy who tried to blackmail an anti-gamergate feminists patrons, or the guy who tried to get wikipedia blocked from the UK because they permabanned him, or as the guy who's building his own twitter with blackjack and hookers. His ED article provides a good rundown of his past, while his KF thread features this entire spat in chronological order, through it's like 100 pages now and packed with garbage shitposts the whole way through. You can find his blog directly by googling 'matthew hopkins witchfinder', but if you're interested enough to be reading all this garbage your best bet is reading the KF thread and following the links there to get it in chronological order.

Anyways, I first met Vordrak when he contacted me here on plebbit to try and feed me dirt on some enemy he'd made who does gamergate or atheism blockbots or something. The first thing I ever said to him was that I'd heard of him before, he's a retard, and he's lucky he doesn't have a KF thread himself. He brushed it off (lol) and pushed forward with giving me his info. I'm not up on all that blockbot drama so I just passed his info on to somebody I know who is. That person decided Vordrak was far more deserving of being the subject of a thread, and made one.

The thread was basically a non-starter. People laughed at him a bit and that was it. If he didn't react it would have got maybe 3 or 4 pages of replies and been forgotten. We didn't realize just how insanely he'd react though. I don't want this to read like a fucking novel and I tried making it something of a timeline but verifying dates and shit is too much effort. I'll just put a list of shit what I remember, basically. If it interests you, I'm sure you'll be able to find the full story elsewhere on the internet.

It all started January 21 - KF thread on Vordrak is created

• Vordrak quietly reports us to Linode for non-existant child pornography. They dehost us.

• Vordrak reports us to our new host, Gandi, again for child pornography. They dehost us. At no time have we ever hosted child pornography, obviously.

• Badly forged emails purportedly from the Kiwi Farms admin, in which he openly admits to being a child molester and stealing/blackmailing the KF community, begin circulating on 8chan.

• Vordrak begins releasing a series of smear articles on KF, in the style of tabloid yellow journalism. I was going to link them but it's too much effort so just google his blog if you want to read them I guess. They start in April and continue up till now.

• Vordrak shops for allies in his crusade using sock accounts and gets told to fuck off basically everywhere he can think of. He tried wrongplanet, a bunch of autism activist subreddits, baphomet, /cow/, I can't remember where else. He also contacts every single mentally ill degenerate we make fun of trying to score allies, including actual pedophiles (despite almost every single blog post he makes accusing his enemies of being pedos). To date, the only one he's managed to win over is a developmentally challenged neo-nazi from Metapedia, which is kind of sweet I guess.

• Vordrak contacts everybody in KF Admin's extended family and their friends and employers, accusing KF Admin of pedophilia and his family of enabling and/or profiting from a child pornography ring. I can't remember everyone he contacted but it got to the point of going after the KF Admin's temporary host's friend's cousin's father's boss or something ridiculous like that.

• Vordrak releases smear articles on KF Admin's mother, doxing her and revealing her unpaid parking tickets. Contacts her boss repeatedly insisting she is at the head of a child pornography ring.

• Somebody who cannot be proven to be Vordrak, but is obviously Vordrak, impersonates KF Admin to send school shooting threats to schools and media outlets in his local area. The entire school district is shut down in panic and KF Admin gets a knock'n'chat from the Pensacola sheriffs and has to explain why an insane gamergate nutjob is targeting him.

• He makes threats veiled as 'warnings' on his blog that more terror hoaxes will come unless KF Admin is arrested, up to and including anthrax threats.

• Realising he's getting nowhere against KF Admin, he starts targeting me. I get some cool smear articles too, and he also starts obsessively contacting his local police, and the police in Pensacola demanding they arrest me for international terrorism (I posted the Hatred intro meme), and pedophile sex crimes (I tweeted a dickpic once). He even has a series of insane blog posts in which he photoshops more and more devils horns and garbage onto the Sheriff of Pensacola for his continued refusal to arrest me for being an internet terrorist.

• Somebody signs up as 'KiwiDynastia' on ED. Along with Likeicare, they edit Vordrak's article to call him a pedophile. Vordrak immediately threatens Likeicare, KiwiDynastia and Zaiger with a lawsuit.

• Vordrak serves me papers over email, which I laugh at. I tell him I'm not KiwiDynastia, he doesn't care. So I laugh more. Our email exchanges are hosted on ED afaik. I'm quite rude to him.

• Vordrak offers to drop the suit against Likeicare and Zaiger if they submit to certain demands ; namely reverting his article, banning me and KiwiDynastia from ED, unbanning him from ED, and doxing me and KiwiDynastia. They tell him to fuck off, but revert his article anyway because the pedo stuff is unfunny bullshit.

• Vordrak calls for a stay on Likeicare and Zaiger, taking his suit to court against KiwiDynastia. He's awarded a default judgement of £1,000 actual damages, £1,000 costs, and £9,000 in hurt feelings (literally says this). The judge specifically notes that he'll never be able to collect because I'm the only person he properly served, and all I have to do is deny being KiwiDynastia. Oh, and I'm in a jurisdiction that uses British libel judgements as toilet paper.

• Vordrak posts a £5,000 bounty on my dox. Before you get your hopes up, it's contingent on him getting a full payout from his lawsuit so like... lol.

• I do a bit of digging into Vordrak's past to find out what all the Evanescence stuff was about, and track down a young girl he stalked and harassed for over two years because she got made moderator on the Evanescence forums instead of him. The harassment included her family being harassed, compromising her debit card information and IM programs (presumably with a keylogger), and even a failed parliamentary petition to call her 'mean-spirited'. When these failed he started slandering the band as pedophiles until legally forced to stop. His victim was 17 when he started that. I post these new revelations. He immediately emails her threatening a defamation suit if she continues talking to me. That's not actually part of the feud, but I thought the fact that he stalked and harassed a minor for over 2 years is worth noting.

• Vordrak gets our paypal cancelled by sending them emails or whatever.

• And now, seven months down the line, just yesterday, Vordrak demanded that the British version of 'internal affairs' launch a full investigation into why the police aren't taking him seriously and arresting me right now for terrorism and penis selfies. Apparently an internal affairs investigation is ongoing, because British police are just so darn polite.

That's basically an overview. If you took the time to read all that shit and want to know more, you'll have to go to KF, lolcow.news or Vordrak's blog to get a more detailed version, but at least it won't look (quite so much) like an incomprehensible mess.