If you don't understand why a guy you were in a relationship with would be upset with you sending topless pics to random dudes then I feel really sorry for your bf.
You make it sound like she was cheating... she was sending them a pic of her piercings. I've gotten pics of other girls topless after getting piercings. I'm bisexual. It didn't phase my boyfriend. We trust each other and understand that not every nude body is sexual./u/hailshailey
The original thread is overall better because it's one user flinging tendies in all directions trying to paint OP as the bad guy for not kissing the feet of his GF while she sends fat fodder to all her friends.
Exactly. A friend of mine has a girlfriend who is a sugar baby on the side. He knows about this, they talked, he knows that she's not emotionally attached to the sugar daddies, and it's one of the most loving relationships I've ever seen.
If OP knew how his girlfriend felt about sending pics and the girlfriend know about her boyfriend's definition of infidelity, this problem wouldn't exist.
Isn't cockblocking nothing more than a preemptive cucking? Because the woman you could have the rights to bang now has free reign to bang someone else. It still happens, you just don't have the moral high ground.
i let my wife pimp my daughter out its their bodies who cares lol look how chill i am women are saints who cant be criticized in any way lol morals dont exist peace to all
never talked about what their boundaries
but your honour my wife shouldnt be divorcing me for fucking 13 teens up the ass we never discussed our boundaries
Considering that like 99% of north americans are monogamous, it's kinda fucking implied you complete dipshit. If she wanted a non-mongamous relationship, she'd say so.
I told myself I wouldn't keep getting into this, but fuck, here I go again.
People view/define sex differently than other. Surprise, this often taboo and confusing subject is subjective to most people. I don't consider posting a boob pic as infidelity, but this guy did. It's almost as if (gasp!) adults can have differing opinions and definitions of sex and monogamy!!!
I have friends in open relationships. I have friends who are sex workers. I also have friends who insist on exclusivity. I have friends who have different definitions of sex. Or indecency. And they're happy. And yet, people have a problem with this. So they don't talk about it. And it broke up what should have been a happy couple. You wanna exaggerate it? Fine. In fact, that's great, because it defines your opinion on it. But other people may not think the way you do. Because they can have their own opinion, and in this case, a more mature opinion than you.
(Also, people still use retarded as an insult? It's 2017, for crying out loud.)
It's great that you have self-awareness! You're a complete and utter minority in this continent and nobody cares about your thoughts and social circle. The vast majority of people think it's cheating and you're surprised that he dared break up with her? Nice victim blaming buddy.
They have a problem with this
They have a problem with infidelity, which is pretty fucking implied in this society. Not all of us live with other crusties.
Retarded as an insult
Sorry, should have used the term genetic dead-end instead.
Sure. But the point is that in the absence of a fully-outlined relationship contract defining every foreseeable contingency, people rely on default template assumptions of relationships that should be explicitly exempted if one party wishes to do so. One of those template assumptions is "don't send pictures of your tits to guys", even if the world would be a better place if people were more chill about that.
It's 2017, for crying out loud.
Attitudes like this are part of why it's still used.
When I was in my early 20's my girlfriend cheated on me, and apparently thought it wise to brag about it to a mutual friend, who promptly told me what had happened. When I confronted her about it she claimed that it wasn't actually cheating, since she had mentally broken up with me in her head prior to the act, and then decided afterwards that she actually wanted to get back together. So it didn't count since we weren't technically together when it happened, and I had no right to be mad.
But of course I was mad, and broke up with her, probably more so because I realized by this excuse of her's just how insanely deluded and unstable she actually was than because of the infidelity. While I was quite angry about it at the time, I consoled myself in the belief that sooner or later she would see through her crazy self-delusion and feel some sort of shame for what she did -- or perhaps she already did feel shame, and the crazy excuses and self-delusion were only a coping mechanism.
Anyways, reading that thread in /r/relationships, I've come to think I might have been wrong about all that. I know from personal experience just how easy it is to delude yourself into more comforting beliefs, but I'm still surprised at the level of seemingly willful and deliberate ignorance a lot of those posters show, and no less about an anonymous stranger's relationship in which they have absolutely no stake. Very bizarre.
Right there is some olympics level rationalization.
Yet any guy who dated a few women won't be surprised by this. I once had a girlfriend who broke up with me because she "Just didn't feel like she could commit to a relationship anymore" and needed "some time alone to find myself". Not even an hour later she asked out one of my friends. He said no because he wasn't a shit person and he told me about it right away. Well guess who shows up in tears later talking about how she "made a mistake" and how she "couldn't stand to not be with me"?
I tell her to fuck off and that she made her choice. She denied asking him out and claimed he was lying (we all worked together so it's not like you can keep secrets like that). When I wouldn't take her back she really broke down in tears and then spent the next 3 years bashing me to all our mutual friends and talking about how much of an asshole I was. Any new person was immediately subjected to tons of talk about how I'm an asshole and super unfair, all because I wouldn't take her back when she "had a moment of weakness" and how "one mistake doesn't mean you can throw everything away".
Maybe I am crazy but it seems very odd that sending topless pictures to friends is good wholesome fun. Especially to a level where you can't see how someone you are in a relationship with would be upset with it. At the very least keep it professional and be a topless model on the side or something. Or maybe send them to your significant other instead. Granted I know my generation started the "free" generation and all, but you consciously entered an exclusive relationship. Not all relationships are typical, but those non-typical items get discussed beforehand so that all parties involved are aware. You can't complete absolve yourself from all responsibility.
If it was so non sexual those same friends shouldn't mind if he send them dick pics like "check out the grooming". I would venture if you did send non-requested dick pics to your friends 95% to 99.999% of them would have a "non sexual" based issue with it. It's not something you can just do willy nilly and think everyone is going to just understand.
I think too many people are fearful of being a prude in that thread, but I think it's normal even in a more open society to have boundaries. You can dismiss anything as non-sexual or non concerning, but everyone has their limits. Would she send them to her parents or siblings? Why would that be different then? Would she send it to an not of age person?
It's not totally obtuse to raise objections to in various circumstances, and being upfront about it and trying to understand is as much a prerequisite for both parties. If there is no consensus that can be achieved then of course those two people might not be compatible, but at least all parties have done their due diligence.
It is difficult in a constantly evolving society where norms change from generation to generation, but again we have to be aware that we all have limits, some fair, some not...but you can't just assume in all cases.
Ha!. Social interaction and ideas are so varied and complex, I try not to put it past myself that I could be the crazy one. I'm fucking limited, and the universe let me know of that on the daily.
I am going to start giving my female coworkers a hearty squeeze of the boobs for a job well done. If anybody objects, I'll just tell them that I was informed that boobs aren't sexual so everything should turn out fine.
Lol I was hoping i would have an aneurysm rather than finish reading that argument from that moron /u/marshmallow_figs Unfortunately I survived another day
55 comments
n/a SnapshillBot 2017-01-15
I know now I'll never have any flair again and I've come to terms with that.
Snapshots:
I am a bot. (Info / Contact)
n/a MechaShitlord 2017-01-15
The thread linked from SRD is even better:
n/a beer__shits 2017-01-15
The original thread is overall better because it's one user flinging tendies in all directions trying to paint OP as the bad guy for not kissing the feet of his GF while she sends fat fodder to all her friends.
n/a OniTan 2017-01-15
Fuck, that makes me think of how great it would be if there were tendie street vendors.
n/a throwaway11272016 2017-01-15
I just quit my job to become a Tendie Vendie
n/a hailshailey 2017-01-15
"Camwhore": its 2017 lmfao the word whore is so overused so ur comments are immediately irrelevant bye
n/a OniTan 2017-01-15
Show me your non sexual tits, please.
n/a raps_caucasionally 2017-01-15
n/a MechaShitlord 2017-01-15
Oink, oink.
n/a throwaway11272016 2017-01-15
CURRENT YEAR AMIRITE???
How much for a pair of your skidmarked panties?
n/a hailshailey 2017-01-15
You've seen my posts. The prices are listed there. Come on. Learn how to use the website
n/a throwaway11272016 2017-01-15
I mean ones with shit stains on them
n/a hailshailey 2017-01-15
If u were serious you'd be sending me an inbox message so go fuck yourself
n/a throwaway11272016 2017-01-15
I'm not ashamed!
n/a ragazzo_soup 2017-01-15
If OP knew how his girlfriend felt about sending pics and the girlfriend know about her boyfriend's definition of infidelity, this problem wouldn't exist.
Is there anyone on SRD that isn't a cuck?
n/a StrategicSarcasm 2017-01-15
Is there anyone who isn't a cuck?
n/a n4rkki 2017-01-15
Celibacy is the only escape from being a cuck.
n/a StrategicSarcasm 2017-01-15
Then you're just cucking yourself. There's no escape anywhere.
n/a rdramathrowaway6969 2017-01-15
Only in the sweet embrace of death.
n/a greenrd 2017-01-15
No, that's cockblocking yourself. That's different.
n/a StrategicSarcasm 2017-01-15
Isn't cockblocking nothing more than a preemptive cucking? Because the woman you could have the rights to bang now has free reign to bang someone else. It still happens, you just don't have the moral high ground.
n/a Monkey_Paralysed 2017-01-15
The celibate are still being cucked by Trump.
n/a accountabi1ity 2017-01-15
Volcel is the one Jrue God
n/a Hammer_of_truthiness 2017-01-15
>Jrue God
>Jue God
THERES NO ESCAPE
n/a wwyzzerdd 2017-01-15
/r/incels.
n/a bytewake 2017-01-15
moments like these confirm: no
n/a xKillerDreag 2017-01-15
/u/marshmallow_figs
You're quite literally fucking retarded.
i let my wife pimp my daughter out its their bodies who cares lol look how chill i am women are saints who cant be criticized in any way lol morals dont exist peace to all
but your honour my wife shouldnt be divorcing me for fucking 13 teens up the ass we never discussed our boundaries
Considering that like 99% of north americans are monogamous, it's kinda fucking implied you complete dipshit. If she wanted a non-mongamous relationship, she'd say so.
n/a marshmallow_figs 2017-01-15
I told myself I wouldn't keep getting into this, but fuck, here I go again.
People view/define sex differently than other. Surprise, this often taboo and confusing subject is subjective to most people. I don't consider posting a boob pic as infidelity, but this guy did. It's almost as if (gasp!) adults can have differing opinions and definitions of sex and monogamy!!!
I have friends in open relationships. I have friends who are sex workers. I also have friends who insist on exclusivity. I have friends who have different definitions of sex. Or indecency. And they're happy. And yet, people have a problem with this. So they don't talk about it. And it broke up what should have been a happy couple. You wanna exaggerate it? Fine. In fact, that's great, because it defines your opinion on it. But other people may not think the way you do. Because they can have their own opinion, and in this case, a more mature opinion than you.
(Also, people still use retarded as an insult? It's 2017, for crying out loud.)
n/a xKillerDreag 2017-01-15
It's great that you have self-awareness! You're a complete and utter minority in this continent and nobody cares about your thoughts and social circle. The vast majority of people think it's cheating and you're surprised that he dared break up with her? Nice victim blaming buddy.
They have a problem with infidelity, which is pretty fucking implied in this society. Not all of us live with other crusties.
Sorry, should have used the term genetic dead-end instead.
n/a King_Eirik_Bloodaxe 2017-01-15
2017
/u/marshmallow_figs confirmed fogey
n/a mtg_liebestod 2017-01-15
Sure. But the point is that in the absence of a fully-outlined relationship contract defining every foreseeable contingency, people rely on default template assumptions of relationships that should be explicitly exempted if one party wishes to do so. One of those template assumptions is "don't send pictures of your tits to guys", even if the world would be a better place if people were more chill about that.
Attitudes like this are part of why it's still used.
n/a xjapxn 2017-01-15
CURRENT YEAR
C
U
R
R
E
N
T
Y
E
A
R
n/a DistortedLines 2017-01-15
I MEAN COME ON AMERICUR
n/a Ultrashitpost 2017-01-15
IT'S THE CURRENT YEAR PEOPLE
n/a heartfullofhatred 2017-01-15
Have an open relationship, I don't give a shit. But you better fucking make it clear to your SO thats what it is.
n/a raps_caucasionally 2017-01-15
n/a REDDIT_IN_MOTION 2017-01-15
Bunch of cuck suckers over there
n/a Ylajali_2002 2017-01-15
When I was in my early 20's my girlfriend cheated on me, and apparently thought it wise to brag about it to a mutual friend, who promptly told me what had happened. When I confronted her about it she claimed that it wasn't actually cheating, since she had mentally broken up with me in her head prior to the act, and then decided afterwards that she actually wanted to get back together. So it didn't count since we weren't technically together when it happened, and I had no right to be mad.
But of course I was mad, and broke up with her, probably more so because I realized by this excuse of her's just how insanely deluded and unstable she actually was than because of the infidelity. While I was quite angry about it at the time, I consoled myself in the belief that sooner or later she would see through her crazy self-delusion and feel some sort of shame for what she did -- or perhaps she already did feel shame, and the crazy excuses and self-delusion were only a coping mechanism.
Anyways, reading that thread in /r/relationships, I've come to think I might have been wrong about all that. I know from personal experience just how easy it is to delude yourself into more comforting beliefs, but I'm still surprised at the level of seemingly willful and deliberate ignorance a lot of those posters show, and no less about an anonymous stranger's relationship in which they have absolutely no stake. Very bizarre.
n/a LordBlackmore 2017-01-15
Right there is some olympics level rationalization.
n/a Taipers_4_days 2017-01-15
Yet any guy who dated a few women won't be surprised by this. I once had a girlfriend who broke up with me because she "Just didn't feel like she could commit to a relationship anymore" and needed "some time alone to find myself". Not even an hour later she asked out one of my friends. He said no because he wasn't a shit person and he told me about it right away. Well guess who shows up in tears later talking about how she "made a mistake" and how she "couldn't stand to not be with me"?
I tell her to fuck off and that she made her choice. She denied asking him out and claimed he was lying (we all worked together so it's not like you can keep secrets like that). When I wouldn't take her back she really broke down in tears and then spent the next 3 years bashing me to all our mutual friends and talking about how much of an asshole I was. Any new person was immediately subjected to tons of talk about how I'm an asshole and super unfair, all because I wouldn't take her back when she "had a moment of weakness" and how "one mistake doesn't mean you can throw everything away".
n/a accountabi1ity 2017-01-15
Shame is for pussies bitch, rocket ships don't have rearview mirrors
n/a raps_caucasionally 2017-01-15
If you made that quote up I'll reference you when I use it, friend
n/a OniTan 2017-01-15
So how hot was she and good was she in bed that you put up with that shit? LOL
n/a The_Reason_Trump_Won 2017-01-15
n/a Strephyl 2017-01-15
This got old quickly
n/a The_Reason_Trump_Won 2017-01-15
n/a King_Eirik_Bloodaxe 2017-01-15
Nah
n/a heartfullofhatred 2017-01-15
I said that when Trump announced his candidacy
n/a lifesbrink 2017-01-15
u/goroman86, send me nudes of your gf and mother please, I need some new material.
n/a -GutZ- 2017-01-15
Maybe I am crazy but it seems very odd that sending topless pictures to friends is good wholesome fun. Especially to a level where you can't see how someone you are in a relationship with would be upset with it. At the very least keep it professional and be a topless model on the side or something. Or maybe send them to your significant other instead. Granted I know my generation started the "free" generation and all, but you consciously entered an exclusive relationship. Not all relationships are typical, but those non-typical items get discussed beforehand so that all parties involved are aware. You can't complete absolve yourself from all responsibility.
If it was so non sexual those same friends shouldn't mind if he send them dick pics like "check out the grooming". I would venture if you did send non-requested dick pics to your friends 95% to 99.999% of them would have a "non sexual" based issue with it. It's not something you can just do willy nilly and think everyone is going to just understand.
I think too many people are fearful of being a prude in that thread, but I think it's normal even in a more open society to have boundaries. You can dismiss anything as non-sexual or non concerning, but everyone has their limits. Would she send them to her parents or siblings? Why would that be different then? Would she send it to an not of age person?
It's not totally obtuse to raise objections to in various circumstances, and being upfront about it and trying to understand is as much a prerequisite for both parties. If there is no consensus that can be achieved then of course those two people might not be compatible, but at least all parties have done their due diligence.
It is difficult in a constantly evolving society where norms change from generation to generation, but again we have to be aware that we all have limits, some fair, some not...but you can't just assume in all cases.
n/a Wacnews_the_White 2017-01-15
No. The SRDines are being crazy.
n/a -GutZ- 2017-01-15
Ha!. Social interaction and ideas are so varied and complex, I try not to put it past myself that I could be the crazy one. I'm fucking limited, and the universe let me know of that on the daily.
n/a merqury26 2017-01-15
No, SRD is definitely crazy.
n/a mrmcdude 2017-01-15
I am going to start giving my female coworkers a hearty squeeze of the boobs for a job well done. If anybody objects, I'll just tell them that I was informed that boobs aren't sexual so everything should turn out fine.
n/a shazbottled 2017-01-15
Lol I was hoping i would have an aneurysm rather than finish reading that argument from that moron /u/marshmallow_figs Unfortunately I survived another day
n/a ragazzo_soup 2017-01-15
Only the dead have seen the end of SRD's autism.
n/a OniTan 2017-01-15
/u/snallygaster
/u/dornishredviper
Tits totally aren't sexual. Post pics please.