[Vintage] Frat bro goes to ICU with alcohol poisoning, rectal trauma. Cops suspect he poured wine up his ass. Frat bro calls lawyer and holds press conference, with entire frat standing behind him wearing suits and sunglasses, to deny Franzia enema rumors, and also tell the world that he is not gay.
258 2017-06-21 by HuckleberryFN2187
This happened a few years ago but it stands as my favorite drama of all time. I wish I could make shit like this up. Pi Kappa Alpha must be so proud.
Recap from TotalFratMove, including a copy of the official police report.
Complete video of the press conference. Distinguished elderly Southern gentleman says "butt-chugging" six times in as many minutes. Xander Broughton is not a gay man. He is a straight man.
Retrospective from local news station when frat was allowed back on campus.
44 comments
n/a VALUABLEDISCOURSE 2017-06-21
Geed fraternity tbh
n/a LSU_Coonass 2017-06-21
ButtChugging is such an old meme, although it is still used to harass Tennessee fans on SecRant.com (an all-sec sports board that is an offshoot of tigerdroppings.com, the greatest website on the internet)
n/a KateUptonsCumback 2017-06-21
I guess when fucking your cousin gets old, fall back on making fun of each other for buttchugging wine.
Sherman didn't finish the job.
n/a LSU_Coonass 2017-06-21
bruh sherman was okay with the south, he was the first president of LSU and gave us cool civil war shit like the guns used at ft sumter, atlanta has literally always been shithole, and sherman recognized that.
n/a KateUptonsCumback 2017-06-21
And all those towns he razed on the way there?
n/a LSU_Coonass 2017-06-21
suburbs
n/a KateUptonsCumback 2017-06-21
He was a pioneer of the mayocide. Still he didn't finish the job.
n/a Promotheos 2017-06-21
I wonder what some other terms would be...
Nutellacide?
n/a Chicup 2017-06-21
I have floated that one around a few times.
n/a snallygaster 2017-06-21
The grimmest fate of all.
n/a RagdollPhysEd 2017-06-21
Always had bedhead in his pics which made him own own own
n/a hopfield 2017-06-21
go vols
n/a hate_expectations 2017-06-21
You can't talk about the university of Tennessee without mentioning buttchugging
n/a RagdollPhysEd 2017-06-21
Just call me the colon gin
n/a Elizadevere 2017-06-21
I upvoted this post just for the use of the word butt chugging. Didn't even need to read.
n/a TheThng 2017-06-21
Confirmed University of tennessee graduate
n/a wwyzzerdd 2017-06-21
Topkek
n/a HuckleberryFN2187 2017-06-21
I bet it was.
n/a RagdollPhysEd 2017-06-21
"Bruh you had to be there. Shit was so fucking sick"
n/a _narrows 2017-06-21
So cash
n/a DodgeIvan 2017-06-21
Xander Broughton. His names like one from those shitty teen movies from the early 2000s to make fun of frat bros
n/a MG87 2017-06-21
I think this frat twink should be modded.
n/a lascanto 2017-06-21
Is this the appropriate time to mention the Streisand Effect?
n/a CucksLoveTrump 2017-06-21
Spend my dollar, "ON BEER" parked in a holler, 'Neath the mountain moonlight. "ROLL TIDE" Hold her up tight, "AGAINST THE WALL" Make a little lovin', "ALL NIGHT" A little turtle dovin' On a Mason-Dixon night. "F$&! AUBURN" Fits my life, "LSU" oh so right, "AND TENNESSEE TOO" My Dixieland Delight.
I'm a texan but god damn this is my favorite southern tradition. damn shame they're getting rid of it. bonus points if you watch from the beginning and listen to all the "Fuck Auburn"s
n/a TheAltRightIsAlright 2017-06-21
My buddies and I have always done "fits my life" "fuck em again" and "oh so right" "one more time" as the last call and response
Fuck Auburn.
n/a DannyLee90 2017-06-21
War Eagle, bitches.
n/a Miguk_Saram 2017-06-21
One of the better press conferences I've ever seen. It almost matches the one in Korea where the guy was trying to prove that the yakuza hadn't cut his dick off.
n/a tyuijvhvhcfcjf 2017-06-21
Link it, fagger. Iun got no Google
n/a Miguk_Saram 2017-06-21
I can't find any video, just a couple articles.
He acted like he was going to pull it out right there on live TV but didn't actually go through with it. In my opinion, the jury is still out on whether he actually has a penis.
n/a Plexipus 2017-06-21
To be honest it's probably the most palettable way to drink Franzia.
n/a Mexagon 2017-06-21
Besides taking it out of the box, pouring the bag over everyone and screaming "tour de franzia"?
n/a TurkeyHillHalfGal 2017-06-21
For this one party we had in college, we ended up stapling bags of Franzia to the ceiling so you could just open the valve and pour it into your mouth. We went through 70L of Franzia that party /shudder
n/a norcalcooter 2017-06-21
Oh the headaches
n/a scatmunchies 2017-06-21
It's fine on ice, if you let it get cold and don't let the ice melt enough to dilute it.
n/a SharkeishaFlex 2017-06-21
Holy shit thank you so much for posting this. This is the funniest thing I've seen in like a month.
n/a HuckleberryFN2187 2017-06-21
You're welcome. All the world deserves to savor this sweet, sweet drama.
n/a Wraith_GraveSpell 2017-06-21
You know how you confirm to everyone at your university and the media that you definitely did in fact take part in butt-chugging and are probably gay? You make a fucking press conference about it for the world to see.
n/a Notthehalf 2017-06-21
Lucky bastard probably had a queue out the frat hose door waiting to have a go in his sloppy bussy
n/a Ultrashitpost 2017-06-21
That reminds me of this case study found on pubmed:
https://www.well.com/~cynsa/cement.html
n/a HuckleberryFN2187 2017-06-21
Science!
n/a JumbledFun 2017-06-21
Lewis Black's segment on this on the Daily Show was pretty funny. Here you go
n/a Notthehalf 2017-06-21
Fucking racist
n/a Notthehalf 2017-06-21
Pics of the rectal trauma?
n/a rcinmd 2017-06-21
TIL: Only gay men butt chug.
n/a freet0 2017-06-21
I am 100% sure this kid poured wine up his ass
n/a 8MileAllstars 2017-06-21
Lawyer here. Whenever something is denied that many times it is likely 100% true.