Hello Guys, AlohaWarrior34 speaking.

0  2017-07-24 by AlohaWarrior34

I sexually Identify as an the sun. Ever since I was a boy I dreamed of slamming hydrogen isotopes into each other to make helium & light and send it throught the galaxy. People say to me that a person being a star is Impossible and I’m fucking retarded but I don’t care, I’m beautiful. I’m having a plastic surgeon inflate me with hydrogen and raise my temperature to over 6000 °C. From now on I want you guys to call me “Sol” and respect my right to give you vitamin D and probably sunburns. If you can’t accept me you’re a fusionphobe and need to check your astral privilege. Thank you for being so understanding.

6 comments

1  Neon_needles 2017-07-24

I know shit posting is bad on Drama sometimes, but this is bad to another level.

1  YiffReich 2017-07-24

I sexually identify as your dad. Ever since I was a boy I dreamed of slamming your mom into ecstasy to make you & your sister and send them to college. People say to me that a person becoming your dad is Impossible and I’m fucking retarded but I don’t care, I’m beautiful. I’m having Doctor Who inflate me with timey whimey wibbly wobbly stuff and raise my libido to over that of a 16 year old. From now on I want you guys to call me “Furry Dad” and respect my right to give your mom "vitamin D" and probably cumburns. If you can’t accept me you’re a parentphobe and need to check your allowance privilege. Thank you for being so understanding.

1  ironicshitpostr 2017-07-24

I wish you were my dad, because then my father would still be alive :(

1  YiffReich 2017-07-24

Let's hug it out?

1  aggressiveshitpost 2017-07-24

You should feel bad if you thought this was funny.

1  AlohaWarrior34 2017-07-24

I don't.