How to Attain Godhood through Masturbation

70  2017-08-11 by R3aperF4n

This is an easy guide to ascend the mortal plane and take your rightful place as sole-arbiter of the universe.

The first step is assuming that you are a straight male and masturbate to vanilla porn, you maybe able to skip several steps depending on your current preferences, and you may swap genders based on sexuality.

Okay, begin with slowly transferring to being submissive, this can be a hurdle depending on what you like, but it is key. Perhaps begin with her scratching, biting, soft bondage etc. things that can still appeal to you, but be sure that you are the subordinate one to some degree.

When you are finally turned on by being more submissive, continue to ramp it up. Harder bondage, edging/orgasm control, masochism, maybe even pegging, any way, you should be very thoroughly enjoy being seen as lesser than your partner. This is through masturbation so you can remove any tedious 'safe words' or other safe guards for the fantasy, so don't worry.

Continue to escalate the femdom aspect, you should thoroughly enjoy being treated as lesser, or even as an object. Slavery or hypnotism should be among them, you should desire to be totally obedient to your mistress, to the point of calling her goddess and your only purpose in life is to serve them.

This step can be quite difficult, but continue to incorporate paranormal aspects into your fantasy/pornography. Perhaps you are summoned by a Greek goddess for an evening of worship? Or a witch makes you her personal sex-toy? Whatever, but they should be super humanly powerful, so much that you could never compete with them.

From this you should move to a total omnipotence fetish, your domme is literally the most powerful being in the universe, she totally controls you and the entire universe you inhabit, everything you have ever known is at her whim. This needs to be incredibly arousing to you, to the point that you exclusively masturbate to this idea. One of the key aspects should be that she can destroy the entire universe at anytime she wants. The sheer power she has over you to do this is the ultimate subordiance.

When this is imprinted in your mind you are incredibly close, the destruction of the universe is arousing to you, and even eldritch creatures may seem attractive. Focus on the universe ending, and repeat until the human aspect is removed. You should be able to now masturbate to the heat-death of the universe and the concept of your own mortality. You are know masturbating to sheer existentialism and fear of the unknown, the limits of your human experience being the ultimate pleasure.

If you enjoyed orgasm denial and control earlier-on you will find this step easier. Stop masturbating, if it is that difficult put yourself in a chastity cage to dissuade you. You will be disincentivised from considering your own demise and the destruction off the universe, letting these limits fall from your mind while simultaneously dominating it with sexual frustration. Finally, now that you have dropped these concepts from your mind, find an isolated stream near your house. Strip naked and sit in the stream and begin to fantasise about the end of the universe. If it has been long enough the sensation of the water over your penis will be enough to bring you to orgasm.

The sheer realisation of your mortality and the futility of life will surge intensely in your mind, your mortality bringing you joy and anguish as is the pleasure you derive. The sensation of the stream is to bring you into total bliss with mother nature and the force and randomness of the flow of time and the universe. As you nut your soul will be totally at peace with the universe and the contradictory nature of the experience and the connectivity with the cosmos will combine in a beautiful alignment, and you will become one with the universe. You shall become a god.

43 comments

1  justcool393 2017-08-11

This, especially unironically.

1  djloreddit 2017-08-11

I don't get it

1  justcool393 2017-08-11

I was giving emphasis to this post.

1  djloreddit 2017-08-11

I don't get (this post)

1  justcool393 2017-08-11

Well, did you read it? I think its obvious; be submissive. :)

1  djloreddit 2017-08-11

Way ahead of you.

(dom me mommy)

1  justcool393 2017-08-11

I'm actually unironically a submissive, so I can't be. Sorry. :(

1  djloreddit 2017-08-11

subClub

Pile in you pathetic worms

1  PhysicsIsMyMistress 2017-08-11

From this you should move to a total omnipotence fetish, your domme is literally the most powerful being in the universe, she totally controls you and the entire universe you inhabit, everything you have ever known is at her whim.

This is the most important sentence of life.

1  snallygaster 2017-08-11

suck your own dick yoga

1  NecessaryPiglet 2017-08-11

Very disappointing tbqhwurnf. Feels more like sucking a dick than getting it. Although considering the fact that you're an r/drama mod, that might not be such a downside.

1  BussySundae 2017-08-11

I'm making a book for suckers MGTOW called 'Tantric Fleshlight', it's a technical and expository manual meant to appeal to the greater audience of /r/Incels members that can't access their own dick due to obesity. Please, will you write the foreword?

1  snallygaster 2017-08-11

sure thing

1  Ed_ButteredToast 2017-08-11

I heard you post bussy?

1  high_side 2017-08-11

I am glad masturbation isn't as labor intensive as reading this post.

1  JohananLiebert 2017-08-11

Speak for yourself. When you are so degenerate that everything becomes vanilla, finding something that excites you is pretty hard.

1  ProphetRith 2017-08-11

This is t funny

1  R3aperF4n 2017-08-11

ewww a kraut

1  wumbo17412 2017-08-11

The first step is assuming that you are a straight male and masturbate to vanilla porn

stopped reading there

1  darth_stroyer 2017-08-11

t. mortal

1  Matues49 2017-08-11

Cab I attain it thu handjobs?

1  glmox 2017-08-11

me too thanks

1  serialflamingo 2017-08-11

Ejaculation should be a social activity.

1  Wraith_GraveSpell 2017-08-11

ejaculation is essentially a handshake.

1  Madbrad200 2017-08-11

i don't have the attention span for thid

1  Wraith_GraveSpell 2017-08-11

brb gonna go look for a local stream

1  Der_Weisse_Teufel 2017-08-11

Sometimes brookes and rivers can also work and might be closer

1  80BAIT08 2017-08-11

>Ctrl+f "jelqing" 0 results.

Not interested.

1  Notthehalf 2017-08-11

you may swap genders based on sexuality.

Instructions unclear, am trans woman now.

1  better_bot 2017-08-11

Wow, that's a lot. Make a vlog.

1  AltRightRulesReddit 2017-08-11

Masturbate while on copious amounts of lsd.

1  grungebot5000 2017-08-11

good luck

1  icyhat 2017-08-11

I've done it before, I fucked an ex-girlfriend on it as well. By far the best ever. Shrooms was pretty cool also. Most people don't want to do the real fun drugs, so fucking a chick on weed is good also. Just don't take a shit on acid, it's not a fun experience unless you want to feel like you're shitting out your bowels completely. Too bad that guy that was making acid in that nuke bunker got busted, he produced good shit.

1  AltRightRulesReddit 2017-08-11

I always have to shit on acid. It's always an ordeal.

1  grungebot5000 2017-08-11

either you got fake acid, you're a satyromaniac or you trip wayy too fuckin much lol

in any case, well done lol

1  icyhat 2017-08-11

You know what the hell you're talking about. I would do anywhere between 2-4 hits at a time, and I would do it fairly often. If you really want to know, I really do have a very high sex drive. I've gotten bunk acid before but it was pretty rare. I think I've gotten more bunk meth than I have with acid. I would try to buy acid only from people I know but sometimes I would buy it from people I didn't know. I would usually buy 10 strips and have a fun weekend. I really wouldn't know how good acid is anymore. The last time I dropped acid was back in 1997.

1  AnnoysTheGoys 2017-08-11

Shrooms was pretty cool also

This means you didn't take enough

1  icyhat 2017-08-11

I never understood what was the right amount of shrooms to do. I would do anywhere between a quarter to a full ounce. I smoked them and ate them. I would always smoke weed so that might have had some effect with them. We're talking 20 years at least since the last time I did them so I'm going off of what I can remember. I don't do anything like that anymore but I'm pretty sure that shrooms haven't changed much over the years. I just stick with weed because I don't really need to complicate things like that anymore.

1  AnnoysTheGoys 2017-08-11

I'm mostly giving you shit because the one time I fucked on shrooms I had taken a bit too much. I was peaking and it was a bizarre primordial experience that I wouldn't say was bad, but wasn't something I'd really aim to try again.

Funnily enough I actually had a small amount of it last night for the first time in maybe 7 years. It was nice and fun and nowhere near the intensity that I remember.

1  icyhat 2017-08-11

I've had a few friends try one cap and get way too fucked off of it. One friend in particular thought that he was in his house and took a piss in my kitchen because he thought that where his bathroom was and got freaked out when he realized he was at my house. That was not fun at all. Babysitting kids is somewhat easy, babysitting an adult that is fucked up on shrooms was as about difficult as you can get. He wanted to go home but I couldn't let someone that fucked up be on their own. There really is no telling what he would have done. We eventually just smoked a fat joint and watched some music videos. He eventually tried shrooms again and had a much better time. I couldn't imagine having that bad of a trip the first time like that.

1  AnnoysTheGoys 2017-08-11

Yeesh. Yeah, some people have horrible reactions to psychedelics. I never officially gave them up, I just have to be comfortable and in the right headspace if it's offered. Turns out that's a lot less often in adult life.

1  double-happiness 2017-08-11

I never understood what was the right amount of shrooms to do.

About 350.

1  icyhat 2017-08-11

I just went with what I thought was a good measure, all of them.

1  double-happiness 2017-08-11

Just don't take a shit on acid, it's not a fun experience

I said that to a female friend of mine, and she immediately one-upped me by saying, "huh, that's nothing, you should try having a period on acid!" That shut me up pretty quick.

1  icyhat 2017-08-11

I guess she might be right. I really don't know because I have a penis and not a uterus. Thus, I'm incapable of having a period.

1  Unruly_tism 2017-08-11

Big if tru

1  elementalychallenged 2017-08-11

I actually really want to try this... It would be genuinely interesting from a philosophical standpoint, I think

1  RenegadeJoeson 2017-08-11

Will this really work? Brb in an hour I'm gonna try it.

1  do0rkn0b 2017-08-11

Yeah I'm REALLY not reading this fucking word wall.

1  redditcup5 2017-08-11

Arya kills Littlefinger on Sansa's order.

The Night's King kills Viserion and makes him into a wight Dragon.

Jon and Dany have sex.

visit /r/freefolk

1  aliceunknown 2017-08-11

Mate, I think you're thinking way too much into this. I'm too hungover to achieve higher thinking right now anyway.

1  SuperShake66652 2017-08-11

masturbate to vanilla porn

What a worthless guide. If it doesn't have a 2D chick with a feminine penis the size of her body, I can't get off at this point.

I guess I'm fucked, fam.