Chris (tine) Chans love quest has finally ended

76  2017-09-09 by wabbit_1444

74 comments

I can take a 9-inch dildo up my butt, because I'm an adult and I solve my own problems

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I really enjoy knowing that some fucking turbo autist sat in his basement for atleast 2 years+ catfishing chris chan.

Can I get a rundown on what this is about?

Search Chis Chan on Encyclopaedia Dramatica or Kiwi Farms. There is no quick rundown on this lolcow.

Does the dramatica article have the images of the festering gash embedded there? Because I do not need to see that shit.

It does. It's one of the most revolting things I've seen.

rothschilds bow to Chris Chan

in contact with Sonichu

rumoured to possess psychic abilities

controls Virginia with an iron fist

own castles and banks all over the world

direct descendants of the ancient royal blood line

will bankroll the first cities on Mars (Cwcville will be be the first city)

own basically every DNA editing research facility on Earth

first designer babies will be Sonichu Babies

Chris Chan said to have 200+ IQ

ancient Indian scriptures tell of Sonic Pikachu hybrids who will descend upon the Earth and will bring an era of enlightenment and unprecedented technological progress with them

They own Nanobot R&D labs around the world

You likely have Sonichubots inside you right now

Chris is in regular communication with the Archangels Michael and Gabriel, forwarding the word of God to the Orthodox Church

He learned fluent Autism in under a week

Nation states entrust their gold reserves with Chris. There's no gold in Ft. Knox, only Ft. Sonichu

Barbara Chandler is 67 years old, from the space-time reference point of the base human.

In reality, he is a timeless being existing in all points of time and space from the big bang to the end of the universe

Chris will guide humanity into a new age of wisdom, peace and love

I see you've taken the Chan Pill.

Sonichuuu Babies, make their dreams come truuue

Fuck you for soiling my memories of Muppet Babies.

You have Chris to thank for that.

https://youtu.be/z97jTGz6y9U

kiwi farms exists because of him, pretty sure they just used to be a cwc wiki

Imagine the second coming of christ but christ is a "high functioning" autist.

Taking the lord's name in vein

REEEEEEEEEEEEEE

I would never take Chis Chan's name in vain

High functioning is pushing it. Medium functioning, perhaps.

"Technically functioning".

Tell me the truth, is this how this person really is or is it some kind of satire?

I'm 10 minutes in and I can't believe someone like this would be living unsupervised.

He's always lived with his parents.

I can't believe I've never heard of this person.

I only found out about him about a year ago. Through /drama of course.

I moved around on the internet and I have been hearing about him for a long time. There is nothing he can do that would surprise me. But you know, what you linked is the fake Chris Chan.

I'm pretty sure it's legit. Regardless the quest is still over

Wow, you really are new to the whole Chris Chan thing.

Chan-pill me fam

Man, that would seriously take hours of telling you directly. He has a problem of knowing when to keep shit to himself. /b/ tried to make him go insane by saying other people were the real Chris-Chan. It worked a little too good. There is seriously no way to paraphrase Chris-Chan. I can link to his ED page and a few videos about him and you would still not get the whole story.

https://encyclopediadramatica.rs/Chris-chan

https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Christian_Weston_Chandler

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bXjnakAlF-s

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bRbFWKPvktU

How have you not watched Chris before and understood how this process all works?

Chris is in a temporary and scripted moment of euphoria, Chris is going to get trolled, if not by her then by himself.

No shit. Dude said the Twitter account was fake. Of course I know she's a troll.

Next up you'll be telling us you've never heard of Jessie Slaughter?

I've never heard of Jessie slaughter

You dun goofed.

The consequences will never be the same.

what the fuck who are you people

People who don't remember Boxxy, either, I'm sure.

Cracky-chan > Boxxy

They are the new drama oldtimer. They are ironic, and hip, and the rest of you are just old and busted NEETs.

There is so much more.... Welcome to the rabbit hole

https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Main_Page

Check this out. Basically every single thing that has happened to him, things he's said and done, have been thoroughly documented. His ridiculous comics and its characters have been analyzed to PHD-thesis-like levels.

GOTTA. GO. FAST.

thrice

You had JENAAAAAAY, some other persona whose name I forget who he had phone sex with about static shocking her clit, then someone around the Ian Brandon Anderson phase

Oh Chris. The ending to your story is never going to be happy.

Murder suicide. You heard it here first

Best case; sudden heart attack.

Worst case; mommy decides she needs to give him back to God before she goes too.

Aneurysm in his sleep, swift, painless.

It's how I want to go.

I say wait and see.

People have been catfishing him for years, this could easily just be someone playing the long con.

We can only hope

Ya think?

Remember when one of the lead trolls in the CWC affair temporarily set the ~fanbase~ into panic mode when he got CWC to state he's actually normal, supports his parents, and played a long con?

no way that's an actual human female

Lmao, Chris(tine) Chan got a girlfriend before we did.

He sure as shit managed to make the Incels look even more pathetic. When goddamn Chris-Chan can get laid before you then you need to just give up on life.

I think chrisers obsession with being a woman was his realization that if he was a cute girl all his autist stuff would have been either ignored or considered quirky and he would at least have a few male autist friends to bang, although maybe some of his stuff would be too strong for even Gussy to mask.

this.

I'd put him more into the "Buffalo Bill" category, of wanting to be a woman.

You've described the majority of transgender women on the internet.

What's your excuse?

My excuse for what?

not finishing YOUR love quest. Post duck.

I'm gay, I don't do love, only taking semen in the bussy. (seriously it;s literally impossible to be incel, people are horny bastards)

This is probably the 12th fake girlfriend he's had. This guy can't stop getting catfished.

this should be inspirational to all r/drama posters

Someone post this to incel

I would, but I'm banned for being a roastie whore

The hero we deserve.

is it wrong of me to wish cwc happiness at this point

No. I do too.

who is this jessica quinn character anyway

Fuck if I know. I looked at her Facebook. No one really comments on her pics, so I don't think it's real. She's pretty attractive minus the brows. Seems like she'd have more friends.

She lives in his town and has known him for a few years IIRC

She lives near his town. I don't think they've actually met IRL. I really hope she (whoever she is) just uses her influence to help the poor bastard. Barbs is living on borrowed time at this point.

There's a time when even the most productive lolcow deserves to be put out to pasture.

Absolutely

Looking for a boyfriend girlfriend free girl boy