This, but unironically.

Snapshots:

1. This Post - archive.org, megalodon.jp*, removeddit.com, archive.is

^{I am a bot. (Info / Contact)}

Wow, wanting to date and fuck some strange. I guess it must be a totally unique lifestyle that people "just don't understand." These people will never not annoy me.

"You see honey, it's not that I really like the idea of cheating on you, it's that I identify as someone who really likes the idea of cheating on you. I can't help it!"

We've got a turd in the punchbowl

I think they did that with Gerald Broflovsky.

Is there a pill for this yet? Like a reverse viagra.

Opiates

If I had gold sir......

You sound like an ass.

Looks like every poly couple I've met

You've met a poly couple irl or are you just memeing? I've never met one :(

They're a dime a dozen in the bay area, unfortunately.

It's not really a couple if it's more than one, right?

I believe we're supposed to refer to them as a herd.

I believe a pestilence of polyamourists is the correct term.

I like how picture 5 has a dog and a couple.

Dumpy, weird facial hair, everything checks out

People hate the word "Moist"

That's the image equivalent.

I will live in denial and chose to believe they all look like this

Instead of the reality of Tumblr fat chicks

I bet their profile pics focus on tits and ass and little to no face.

Yuck

Anybody wondering what the best of /r/polyamory people who discuss their fetishes on Reddit look like.

youre not wrong

You sound like a mad

OMG, people are constantly evolving and aren't static even after marrying!

True. I used to know a super nice church girl, but I met her years later and she was blowing dudes for Xanax. Could have been worse, though. She wasn't poly.

Eh, do you still have her number?

Do you have the number of the dude with the Xanax?

dude hook us up cmon

Just go to Backpage. You'll come away with fewer diseases.

Do you have the number for that church?

What denomination?

I dunno.

Did her cross have a little guy on it or not?

No. She was a Christian.

She's no worse off. Protestants will burn in hell with the Jews and drug addicted whores anyway.

Why don't you go petition the church to declare Mary co-redemptrix?

Did you really think people would be able to make a religion out of a Jewish guy who got nailed to a board 2,000 years ago without including his mother?

Why are you here and not whoring yourself out on /r/random_acts_of_amazon?

:-*

No thanks

Be gone, pervert! Marriage is a union between two people only.

Two people and the poolboy

But the babysitter is a person between both people!

Maybe instead of spending all day jerking off and fantasizing about fucking around on your wife you should evolve into someone with a job.

I hear the more lead in your water, the less static you are

I hope that if I drink enough lead water I'll be as progressive as you one day

That is poor planning.

Well, that relationship is headed for divorce. The wife, who sounds like she has some sense, should take the kids and run...

Agreed, sweetie.

Don't call him sweetie. What are you, a gay?

Don't tell me what I can or cannot call my wife.

Don't speak to me or your wife ever again

Go poo in loo

reee im not a dhoti nigger

Same thing

/u/wololololow been his wypipo impersonation. He manages to hit the toilet bowl 1 out of every 10 times so far!

I prefer mayo american

Reeeeee

Translation from Kebabic-Oh Allah, why did you remind me of my greatest regret in the world,

Bismillah the kuffar shall pay for his haram lifestyles by being put to the blade of holy Mohammed(((pbuh)))

(((pbuh)))

Now I get why (((He))) allows for so much suffering and destruction in this world.

All suffering from (((his))) wisdom is reserved for the infidels insh'a'allah

So what you're saying is Rohingyas or Palestinians can't possibly be suffering, right? I mean, I believe the same thing but that's because I think they are subhuman. It's just funny to have some belief in common with Islam.

They suffer because of the Jewish great Satan with which the forces of Allah wage his holy Intifada.

It sounds like Stockholm Syndrome because she's still with him

It was heading for divorce when he decided to become a stay at home dad, their divorce rates are sky high.

Source?

Source

Fuck. You got me.

http://www.ibtimes.com/stay-home-dads-likely-divorce-297541

I prefer my source

It did have the air of understated genious.

Wait - so hes a bum who wants to fuck a lot of people? Play on player.

More like play through and call your shots.

Poly dating a Mono? lol.

Back in my day we had a different way of expressing that.

Yeah. A man. Who kept his mouth shut.

So... you people are assholes.

So,. Whose alt are you?

And?

True.

Thanks

Yes.

Yes, WE'RE the assholes.

thanks sherlock

The best assholes

Not an argument.

we're right and you know it

We prefer the term "bussies," now post yours.

We prefer the term "Bussies"

Aren't you supposed to wait until you are old and fat before you give up on having any standards?

OP, this drama sucks. It'd be good if the guy was caught by his wife fucking behind her back. This just sounds like a guy who needs marriage counseling.

/u/InMemoriamBrash If you were smooth enough to pull off the multiple women trick, your wife WOULD be into it. Hope this helps.

/u/physioworld I'm teetering on talking to my girlfriend about this. it's partly because i don't know how i identify.

Yeah, personally I identify as a dude who fucks lots of different women. I can't help it, I was BORN THIS WAY!

Some people, even mot people prefer to be monogamous, it remains to be seen how many of them are biologically driven to monogamy and how many culturally, or some combination, however, given the prevalence of cheating it seems like lots of people would wish to swing or be polyamorous but for some reason, choose or force themselves not to be. Personally I would never cheat on my girlfriend, however I do want to have sex with other women, so three possibilities exist: 1) I remain faithful but always repress that impulse 2) I remain faithful until temptation and circumstance make me do something I'll regret or 3) speak with her and see how she feels about it, whether she feels that sex with other people nullifies our relationship.

Dude literally everybody in a relationship likes the idea of fucking hot people on the side with no consequences, it's not some unique trait to be 'monogamous', it's just having some semblance of willpower and dedication

Just fuck her hard while THINKING about that girl you saw bending over today.

Right of course I get that and like I said I would never cheat on my girlfriend, because I have the aforementioned dedication and willpower...my issue is why fight perfectly natural urges other than not hurting someone. People who feel the urge to murder should keep fighting it because murder always hurts someone, but why resist an urge that hurts nobody?

Because would you be happy with your girlfriend sharing intimate personal experiences with other men? You must have an incredibly strong faith in humanity to believe that your girlfriend would not begin to have any feelings for the many guys she fucks and that those guys would not develop feelings for her.

Actually yes, i'd be fine with that, as long as she told me about it first, otherwise shes doing something, assuming i wouldn't be ok with it, which is a breach of trust. We've been together nearly 2 years, i trust that she loves me so her having sex with other guys, wouldn't be an issue for me. I'd actually be more comfortable with it now than I would have been 3 months into the relationship, because I really believe she loves me now.

Some people, even mot people prefer to be monogamous,

You really think this how relationships work? Are you like 18 or something?

Have we reached peak retard and self-obsession? Are people believing every impulse they now have is something biological that makes them special and unique? Just because you're monogamous doesn't mean you become a monk only satisfied with your wife. Hot women are still hot it's just up to you to be a respectable adult and stay true to your commitments

even mot people prefer to be monogamous

No, they've just grown into adults and know how to keep it in their pants, despite what they want.

given the prevalence of cheating it seems like lots of people would wish to swing or be polyamorous but for some reason, choose or force themselves not to be

Them not being retarded enough to think of a stupid excuse like "being poly" is not the same thing.

But why though...to me cheating is breaking trust so generally, having sex with other people is breaking trust. Some people would consider their partner kissing someone on the cheek offensive and if they kiss someone anyway, that's cheating too. I personally don't see sex as a huge deal, but if she fell for someone emotionally, i'd be crushed. I just don't see the value in placing all these restrictions on something we all want to do at least some of the time.

I just don't see the value in placing all these restrictions on something we all want to do at least some of the time.

I mean, that's fine, but if we're going to argue why social standards exist, then why start there instead of the million other things that come before it... such as... marriage?

I don't see why you'd get married if you don't want to, or are rather, not willing to be monogamous... especially when the other person is monogamous.

Well for one thing, i'm not married, so that's not at issue. And i'm not arguing that monogamy shouldn't exist, just that the social construct that is marriage/ intimate relationships don't need to be so strict. Like in your opinion, why should an intimate relationship where one or both parties have sex either regularly or not with other people, be less valid than a relationship where neither does?

Sex seems to be one of those areas that needs to be tightly controlled, if you tightly controlled other aspect of your partners social life you'd be labelled needy and controlling, even if you felt genuine jealousy which you couldn't choose to feel.

Like in your opinion, why should an intimate relationship where one or both parties have sex either regularly or not with other people, be less valid than a relationship where neither does?

Define "less valid".

I think a relationship where two people commit to each other exclusively is a lot more meaningful than one where there's 3+ people in the mix.

At the end of the day, it's something you should definitely discuss before hand... not after 2 years of marriage, with kids, and then you say: "Lol, I want to fuck other women, guess I'm poly now!".

I guess by valid i mean "worthy of acceptance as a relationship format where people can be happy without being sneered at". I disagree that it is by default, for example two people in a committed relationship who are unhappy together to me is less meaningful than one with 3+ where all involved are happy. Of course you should discuss it beforehand, but i don't think you should necessarily discuss it before the relationship, you could start having these feelings at any point, as long as you discuss it before starting acting on it and don't act on it if your partner isn't on the same wavelength.

Listen you're free to be in a poly relationship as I am free to sneer at you for it

No shit, you’re also free to sneer at gay people and the disabled but people now understand that not only is there nothing wrong with those things but people don’t choose to be that way.

So you're suggesting that wanting to fuck someone else other than your girlfriend is the same as being gay?

I'm a gay guy who is in a relationship. One of the biggest issues I have with my BF is his really low sex drive. I pretty much always wanna fuck guys other than my BF but I don't because I actually respect my partner and I love him and would never do anything to hurt him.

You are a fucking retard. Wanting to fuck some other chick isn't abnormal, and it's nothing like being gay.

Lol are you comparing your plight to disabled and LGBT people?

Yes, I am, though I wouldn't exactly call it a plight...there are similarities though, that all 3 are groups that at certain times in history and to this day have been looked down on as inferior or not worthy of respect. The extent to which that is true is obviously difference but it doesn't take a genius to see the parallel.

I mean we had polygamy for centuries

Yeah for sure, as we've also had LGBT and disabled people for centuries and at different times and places they've been respected and others they've been condemned. In "western" culture, polyamory is for the most part looked down upon, in my view, for absolutely no reason whatsoever.

Personally I would never cheat on my girlfriend, however I do want to have sex with other women

Oh noooooo. What you gonna do

What planet do you live on? Given the right combination of opportunity, drink, and perceived lack of consequence, and 95% of men will cheat. It IS biological. We have a natural drive to spread our seed.

I remain faithful until temptation and circumstance make me do something I'll regret

I.e. what most men do until they are 40 and unhappily married and the 28 yr old waitress asks for a ride home.....

You can't do effectively two things at once, act like polyamory isn't a mind blowing deal, and also link to a normal relationship post and pretend it's big drama. This feels like a little kid getting all hyped about his friend smoking weed. You might not like polyamory, but to consider this drama is more reflective of OP having a sheltered existence.

you can't. you're just gonna have to be triggered a lot.

I've tended to find it fairly easy to avoid people like you. I just stay away from trailer parks and redneck bars.

I'm a liberal in california city with a girlfriend and a husband. If you wanna stay safe from people like me, stay in your mom's basement.

Yeah you say you have a husband and a girlfriend but you ain't got a fucking job. What fucking time is it on the west coast right now? Four in the morning?

Sounds like you're keeping trailer trash hours to me.

haha, I guarantee you my job is sweeter than you imagine. And 2 of us have high paying gigs, so it works out well. And it's 2:20ish, I keep own hours now y'all.

Tell me, what makes you so angry about two women being in love with each other, and a man. I always wonder what could go so wrong with someone that a situation like mine would freak them out so much.

high paying gigs

!= "job"

You're claiming to be a chick?

Bragging about your alleged salary and how much sex you're getting?

Naaah.

internet person, what does it matter if you think I am who I am. I guess you could go through my comment history if you like and see if it adds up.

Christ, put this shit together a little better. Look at the obvious context. It was in response to the assumption that because I fell in love with another woman, and that my husband was ok with it, that I must be trailer trash and have no job. I just said that's not true. And I never mentioned how much sex I get. You guys are like hair trigger sensitive about this shit. Why do you care so much about who loves who?

Jesus, and you were the one saying OP was triggered...

he was

i think you're just a tad embarrassed by making no sense in your comment

I guess whatever gets you through the night.

Apart from swigging Thunderbird and late night re-runs of the professional wrestling, of course.

theres nothing wrong with having a drink and enjoying some eye candy

Couldn't agree more.

I imagine you are a dude in his early twenties living in his mom's trailer. You're "husband" is an Elon Musk cutout with a strapon taped to it, and your girlfriend is a body pillow that you don't wash nearly enough.

You leave Yuni alone!

this is hot, dont stop

Hold on, I just threw up. Let me rinse my mouth out then I'll continue.

take your time

I'm a liberal in a california city with an impending divorce

Ftfy

i dunno, things are pretty sweet right now. life is good, husband is definitely not complaining.

I'm a liberal in a california

You don't say.......

haha, yeah

Some of us aren't degenerate like this

Claiming infidelity is caused by his biological condition is retarded, ergo worthy 0f drama

no way. It's a bit dorky, maybe even unethical, but talking about desires in a poly subreddit is pretty damn normal. And there was no real drama in the comment section.

I'm just saying, not liking polyamory, and thinking a very vanilla post on relationship advice is super dramatic, are two separate things. If OP doesnt like it, thats cool. But it's not saucy drama. It's like getting all freaked out that your parents had sex. It's life. Gotta grow up some time.

I'm just saying, not liking polyamory, and thinking a very vanilla post on relationship advice is super dramatic, are two separate things.

The saucy part is that sub convincing this shmo that, rather than getting a divorce, he's putting his wife through hell by "coming out as poly".

no, not at all. there's a massive gap in your understanding of the situation, yo. It's that if he is "coming out as poly" (I don't think poly is an identity personally), he's saying more than he wants to fuck other women. He's saying he happens to be a man who doesn't get as bent out of shape about his girlfriend making connections as well. That's the rub. He's saying, "both you and I could be with other people, and I would still love you." I doubt you would be ok with that situation, so there is something more here than just him just wanting an excuse to get some side action. That's generally what people mean by recognizing yourself as poly. Again, I don't necessarily see it that way, but I think you're missing that there aspect.

And jesus fuck. It's not dramatic. It's fucking boring and typical and vanilla. He wasn't like "I wanna get pegged in the ass by my boyfriend while my girlfriend watches, but dangit, she cries every time she's in the room!" The fact that there's no drama here makes this comment section sound like a bunch of triggered sjw's.

It's that if he is "coming out as poly" (I don't think poly is an identity personally), he's saying more than he wants to fuck other women.

Yeah, he's saying he wants to fuck other women and stay married.

He's saying he happens to be a man who doesn't get as bent out of shape about his girlfriend making connections as well.

His wife, not his girlfriend. She's not interested in "making connections" at all.

He's saying, "both you and I could be with other people, and I would still love you."

Then he should find someone who's down with that.

I doubt you would be ok with that situation, so there is something more here than just him just wanting an excuse to get some side action.

I've been in that situation without the silly labels, toxic community, or springing it on a partner after two years of marriage.

That's generally what people mean by recognizing yourself as poly.

It's one part swinging and one part let me overshare my sex life with others.

And jesus fuck. It's not dramatic. It's fucking boring and typical and vanilla.

Forcing poly on an unwilling spouse is pretty dramatic imho.

He wasn't like "I wanna get pegged in the ass by my boyfriend while my girlfriend watches, but dangit, she cries every time she's in the room!"

Nah, that'd just be funny and sad, not dramatic.

The fact that there's no drama here

lol fact?

makes this comment section sound like a bunch of triggered sjw's.

Imagine being this retarded 😂😂😂😂😂😂😂

you're completely right that if it's one sided poly, then that usually sucks. But if he is ok with her doing that, then it's an ethical position. And you're also right that he should find someone who is down with that.

The rest is bullshit. I have a girlfriend and a husband. We don't really sleep with anyone else. It's definitely not swinging for us. And we don't tell people shit about our sex life.

And it's still just definitely not dramatic. It just sounds like you are tsk tsking the practice of polyamory more than finding any drama. Just sounds bitchy.

lol you are the drama. Keep it up!

you're in this too now

thanks!

/u/InMemoriamBrash

I didn't know I was poly

I told her that I was comfortable identifying as poly

How do you identify as poly? It's not a sexual orientation, it's a lifestyle choice. How is "wanting to love multiple people" an identity?

I don't understand why polys get married, because you hear disaster stories every other day and marriage gives you a lot of red tape to work through. Why not just keep everything informal?

I'm warning you, this shit is not going to turn out good. This archive is what's going to happen to you. This isn't the only one; there are tons of poly horror stories out there.

Don't think with your dick buddy, think with your brain. It seems like you have a loving wife and kids, and you're wanting to fuck it up. Stop going on that shithole of a subreddit called /r/polyamory, and become a /r/drama poster.

‘Polys’ don’t exist, they’re called regular people.

If I had some chick willing to work while I stayed at home I'd go full Jefferson Darcy.

You don't "identify" as poly. No such thing as a poly identity.

You just want to fuck on the side. And it's fine, really, knock yourself out fucking bipolar whores who pretend the huge amount of dick they get will improve their worthless lives. But don't tell me it's an identity and you need a coming out because fuck off. It's degeneracy, not identity.

WHOA buddy. See, this is the penultimate problem in a liberal democracy and why the west will collapse under the onslaught of Islam. The entire system in predicated on the sophomoric notion that the highest virtue is "choice", regardless of what is chosen. We worship at the religion of "choice" and are compelled or shamed to accept and "validate" every choice no matter how base, demeaning, derogatory, vile, or harmful to society. Its fucking moronic. So, YES I will insult the stupid hoe who has 6 kids with no father and sells her EBT card to get a vajizzle. Yes, I will "shame" a woman for promiscuity, as promiscuity is responsible for the decline in marriage, the rising rate of STDs, and inability of females to pair bond.

 I cried and told her I don't ever want her to feel bad about who she is

What, not a slut?

There's been a bunch of these posts lately. Makes me think it's one person writing them all for kicks

I'm teetering on talking to my girlfriend about this. it's partly because i don't know how i identify- on the one hand i'm not interested in one night stands but on the other i'm not interested in any full blown relationships with anyone other than my girlfriend, a la polyamory, i'm more interested in having friends with benefits style relationships as and when they present themselves, without seeking them out

Basically, I just want to cheat on my wife and get laid with no consequences.

Uh, duh!

I almost left my husband over the guilt but when I finally told him what had happened (yes I cheated) he said ‘is that it?’ Over the next few years we talked a lot!!! He is still mono but totally encouraging of my relationship with my boyfriend.

I.e. my husband has a cuck fetish and I have no respect for him. SOmeday I will tell him the kids aren't his, but not now.

On the nosey!

As a married swinger who sport fucks, I find poly people annoying as fuck. No you aren't poly, you just don't want to pretend its not sex motivating you so you feel less "dirty".