r/drama we need to get something straight, sometimes this board can just be a dick-measuring contest on who has the "worst/best fetish" you fegs have nothing on me, Cars, the film gets me rock, fucking solid just the idea of being an anthropomorphic car makes me throb harder than a water pump, first thing i'd do as a car would do stick my exhaust pipe so far up another car that they get cancer just from my exhaust fumes alone.
I want this fantasy to come true, so all I ask of you is:
Sure, I might make a lot of assumptions about race and crime and whatever else makes me an intolerant person, but I'm always the quickest to guess that if there's someone out there committing an act of piss-jello ingestion, that he's white. Armed robbery over by the university? Probably a mid-20s black male. A Pixar's Cars' Guido-online-roleplayer whose personal and professional life is constantly strained by his proselytization of unrestrained coprophagia, or what his kiddy-mind insists on calling a natural love of 'the poopy?' That guy? The kind of guy who can't find refuge in various coprophagial subreddits? A gay man who frequently posts about the virtue-signaling SJWs he despises, whom he knows to be too good themselves not to kinkshame him and his poopy? A man who could only find home in a community for other Cars-roleplaying parapheliacs, a member who makes that other guy whose fetish is the comparatively milquetoast cartire? A guy whose fetishes make a cartire fetish 'unremarkable?' Him? You wanna fucking guess what his race is? You wanna fucking guess what color that makes this man's skin?
Do you want to fucking guess what this proud, polemic, queer, retarded and poor 40-year-old man--whose life has been contorted by ALL SORTS of VISCIOUSLY degenerative influences up till now--looks like? Can you even guess? Is he black? Asian? No? What is he? WHAT IS MY SHARED DISTANT ANCESTRY WITH THIS MAN? SAY IT, AND YOU'LL BE RIGHT.
WHITE PEOPLE EVERYWHERE, LISTEN: IF YOU EVER FEAR FOR YOUR SAFETY WALKING DOWN A SIDEWALK WITH A MINORITY, REST ASSURED THAT WHILE YOU MIGHT HAVE LEGITIMATE REASON TO CHANGE THE SIDE OF THE STREET, NEVER ASSUME YOUR FACE IS BETTER THAN HIS. BEHOLD THE MASTERRACE: A PEOPLE OF SHARED SKINCOLOR THAT HAS EVOLVED THE OLDER FORMS OF HARMLESS JAPANESE FANTASY AND SCATOLOGY AND VIOLENCE INTO A GROTESQUE ART OF VIVID, WHOLE PERSONALITY: AN INDIVIDUALITY THAT TRANSCENDS ANY RESTRAINT; AN INDIVIDUALITY THAT BLINDLY, INEXORABLY BUCKS PROPRIETY OR ANY CONCERN FOR OTHERS IN FAVOR OF AN UNPRECEDENTED, UNCHARTED, UNFORESEEABLE IDIOSYNCRASY OF CONSCIOUSNESS, OF HEADONISM, OF BEING! AN INVOLUTED INDIVIDUALITY THAT BREEDS UPON ITSELF FOR FURTHER WORSENING, AND UPON SOCIETY FOR INTELLECTUAL AND CORPOREAL SURVIVAL! LOOK AT YOUR BLACK WELFARE! YOUR WASTED TAX MONIES SPENT ON IMMIGRANTS! YOUR PRECIOUS FOOD AND WATER WASTED FOR THOSE CRIMINALS', OF ALL AWFUL, INFERIOR COLORS, PERPETUATION! BUT TO LOOK AT YOUR SELFSAME MAYO'S DEPRAVITIES AND FOREGO DAMNING THE FORLORNEST SUBSPECIES A CHRISTIAN GOD SHOULD HAVE DAMNED AND WORSE!
Woah, that shouldn't've gone on that long. Anyway, perhaps I'm just a white supremacist for believing that mayos are the best at severe, life-crippling fetishes that regularly transcends the most critical fictions. Or perhaps I'm actually liberal in assuming that white privilege is the opportunity to sit at the computer all day and watch enough anime, MLP, Cartoon Network, Japanese scat porn, and power tool disassembly YouTube videos to actually achieve an individual, unique life.
I'm not calling for a genocide of mayos personally, but each passing day of pretending that I'm a shit-eating anamorphic car named Guido, fucking GUIDO of all fucking names, I see a holocaust, a complete immolation of the white race, a literalpiecemealdisassembly of the white body to ensure complete and utter conflagration and cremation of every last mayo, a necessity for humanity's intellectual, moral, and practical advancement.
16 comments
1 SnapshillBot 2017-11-18
No wonder you have an army of pretentious neckbeard losers following you around
Snapshots:
I am a bot. (Info / Contact)
1 aliceunknown 2017-11-18
Hasbro sucks anyway, Mattel is way better..
1 XhotwheelsloverX 2017-11-18
This, but unironically.
1 aliceunknown 2017-11-18
< XhotwheelsloverX
Name checks out.
1 TinyJibble 2017-11-18
r/drama we need to get something straight, sometimes this board can just be a dick-measuring contest on who has the "worst/best fetish" you fegs have nothing on me, Cars, the film gets me rock, fucking solid just the idea of being an anthropomorphic car makes me throb harder than a water pump, first thing i'd do as a car would do stick my exhaust pipe so far up another car that they get cancer just from my exhaust fumes alone.
I want this fantasy to come true, so all I ask of you is:
Post bussy.
1 AlohaWarrior34 2017-11-18
Imagine typing something this retarded.
1 AlohaWarrior34 2017-11-18
U first.
1 Ed_ButteredToast 2017-11-18
No u 😘
1 ImJeeezus 2017-11-18
good work hasbro
1 glmox 2017-11-18
Sure, I might make a lot of assumptions about race and crime and whatever else makes me an intolerant person, but I'm always the quickest to guess that if there's someone out there committing an act of piss-jello ingestion, that he's white. Armed robbery over by the university? Probably a mid-20s black male. A Pixar's Cars' Guido-online-roleplayer whose personal and professional life is constantly strained by his proselytization of unrestrained coprophagia, or what his kiddy-mind insists on calling a natural love of 'the poopy?' That guy? The kind of guy who can't find refuge in various coprophagial subreddits? A gay man who frequently posts about the virtue-signaling SJWs he despises, whom he knows to be too good themselves not to kinkshame him and his poopy? A man who could only find home in a community for other Cars-roleplaying parapheliacs, a member who makes that other guy whose fetish is the comparatively milquetoast cartire? A guy whose fetishes make a cartire fetish 'unremarkable?' Him? You wanna fucking guess what his race is? You wanna fucking guess what color that makes this man's skin?
Do you want to fucking guess what this proud, polemic, queer, retarded and poor 40-year-old man--whose life has been contorted by ALL SORTS of VISCIOUSLY degenerative influences up till now--looks like? Can you even guess? Is he black? Asian? No? What is he? WHAT IS MY SHARED DISTANT ANCESTRY WITH THIS MAN? SAY IT, AND YOU'LL BE RIGHT.
WHITE PEOPLE EVERYWHERE, LISTEN: IF YOU EVER FEAR FOR YOUR SAFETY WALKING DOWN A SIDEWALK WITH A MINORITY, REST ASSURED THAT WHILE YOU MIGHT HAVE LEGITIMATE REASON TO CHANGE THE SIDE OF THE STREET, NEVER ASSUME YOUR FACE IS BETTER THAN HIS. BEHOLD THE MASTERRACE: A PEOPLE OF SHARED SKINCOLOR THAT HAS EVOLVED THE OLDER FORMS OF HARMLESS JAPANESE FANTASY AND SCATOLOGY AND VIOLENCE INTO A GROTESQUE ART OF VIVID, WHOLE PERSONALITY: AN INDIVIDUALITY THAT TRANSCENDS ANY RESTRAINT; AN INDIVIDUALITY THAT BLINDLY, INEXORABLY BUCKS PROPRIETY OR ANY CONCERN FOR OTHERS IN FAVOR OF AN UNPRECEDENTED, UNCHARTED, UNFORESEEABLE IDIOSYNCRASY OF CONSCIOUSNESS, OF HEADONISM, OF BEING! AN INVOLUTED INDIVIDUALITY THAT BREEDS UPON ITSELF FOR FURTHER WORSENING, AND UPON SOCIETY FOR INTELLECTUAL AND CORPOREAL SURVIVAL! LOOK AT YOUR BLACK WELFARE! YOUR WASTED TAX MONIES SPENT ON IMMIGRANTS! YOUR PRECIOUS FOOD AND WATER WASTED FOR THOSE CRIMINALS', OF ALL AWFUL, INFERIOR COLORS, PERPETUATION! BUT TO LOOK AT YOUR SELFSAME MAYO'S DEPRAVITIES AND FOREGO DAMNING THE FORLORNEST SUBSPECIES A CHRISTIAN GOD SHOULD HAVE DAMNED AND WORSE!
Woah, that shouldn't've gone on that long. Anyway, perhaps I'm just a white supremacist for believing that mayos are the best at severe, life-crippling fetishes that regularly transcends the most critical fictions. Or perhaps I'm actually liberal in assuming that white privilege is the opportunity to sit at the computer all day and watch enough anime, MLP, Cartoon Network, Japanese scat porn, and power tool disassembly YouTube videos to actually achieve an individual, unique life.
I'm not calling for a genocide of mayos personally, but each passing day of pretending that I'm a shit-eating anamorphic car named Guido, fucking GUIDO of all fucking names, I see a holocaust, a complete immolation of the white race, a literal piecemeal disassembly of the white body to ensure complete and utter conflagration and cremation of every last mayo, a necessity for humanity's intellectual, moral, and practical advancement.
1 TinyJibble 2017-11-18
This but unironically.
1 whenweriiide 2017-11-18
🤔... 👏👏
1 HodorTheDoorHolder 2017-11-18
mayocide now
1 Senator_Chickpea 2017-11-18
They can try, but they'll never hit the standard that Milton Bradley set.
1 Gothmog26 2017-11-18
Knew Trump wasn't a natural blonde.
1 a_normal_human 2017-11-18
Exactly what I would expect from the company responsible for bronies.
1 pizzashill 2017-11-18
Lmao.
1 Going_up_the_Country 2017-11-18
High-energon centipedes.