Minnesota statutes state that "intentional touching of the clothing covering the immediate area of the buttocks" is not considered criminal sexual conduct.
Apparently it's open-season on butts in Minnesota.
With all the enormous fat asses over there, they would never had the manpower to process every case where a hambeast gets accidentaly touched (for instance because she almost fills an elevator with her ass) and decides to sue to prove the whole world that someone wanted her enough to assault her.
Now that the dogs of war are calling for the head of Senator Al Franken I believe it is time to speak up on behalf of all heterosexual males. As a candidate for Moderator let me save my opponents some research time. In the last fifty years I was sexually intimate with approximately 50 very attractive females. It ranged from a gorgeous blonde who was my first true love and we made passionate love in the hayloft of her parents barn and ended with a drop dead gorgeous red head from Cleveland.
Now can we get back to discussing legalizing marijuana and opening the state hospital network to combat the opioid crisis. I am sooooo disappointed by this national feeding frenzy about sexual indiscretions decades ago.
Peace.
Menz responded to her sister on Facebook: "Dude -- Al Franken TOTALLY molested me! Creeper!"
Remember, victims of sexual assault don't always handle it in the same way. Some get on facebook and joke that they were sexually assaulted as if it hadn't actually happened and then finally come out and say it did 7 years later.
“Menz said she wanted to share an "uncomfortable" interaction that left her feeling "gross."”
Can we please use our grownup words to describe serious situations (if you can even call this one)? Like fuck you lady, bugs are gross and icky, having a senator sliding a finger up and down your crack requires a bit more articulation for me to take you seriously
18 comments
1 SnapshillBot 2017-11-20
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1 Ed_ButteredToast 2017-11-20
Archive wasn't working :/
http://webcache.googleusercontent.com/search?q=cache:http://edition.cnn.com/2017/11/20/politics/al-franken-inappropriate-touch-2010/index.html
1 RhymeToes 2017-11-20
No word yet if Senator Franken had a better one-liner than "David Cop-a-feel"
1 grungebot5000 2017-11-20
wait, if it was for a photo then where tf is it?
1 RhymeToes 2017-11-20
Literally in the thumbnail of the article.
1 grungebot5000 2017-11-20
those are just blobs
1 Strictlybutters 2017-11-20
The look of total degeneracy. Her face screams help me, don't let her gigantic smile fool you.
-Her, probably
1 buttermyself 2017-11-20
Thats definitely the look of a woman with unwanted frankenfingers jammed up her cooz.
1 grungebot5000 2017-11-20
"Frankenfingers" sounds like a limited-time promotional item from Burger King
1 BigLordShiggot 2017-11-20
Transfingers jammed in xir frankengash.
1 grungebot5000 2017-11-20
that sounds like some kind of nu-metal reference
1 BigLordShiggot 2017-11-20
I'm a nu-metal nu-male
1 Obskulum 2017-11-20
LITERALLY FUCKING RAPE
1 rewind45 2017-11-20
Scandalous.
1 RhymeToes 2017-11-20
Apparently it's open-season on butts in Minnesota.
1 IAintThatGuy 2017-11-20
With all the enormous fat asses over there, they would never had the manpower to process every case where a hambeast gets accidentaly touched (for instance because she almost fills an elevator with her ass) and decides to sue to prove the whole world that someone wanted her enough to assault her.
1 buttermyself 2017-11-20
Now that the dogs of war are calling for the head of Senator Al Franken I believe it is time to speak up on behalf of all heterosexual males. As a candidate for Moderator let me save my opponents some research time. In the last fifty years I was sexually intimate with approximately 50 very attractive females. It ranged from a gorgeous blonde who was my first true love and we made passionate love in the hayloft of her parents barn and ended with a drop dead gorgeous red head from Cleveland. Now can we get back to discussing legalizing marijuana and opening the state hospital network to combat the opioid crisis. I am sooooo disappointed by this national feeding frenzy about sexual indiscretions decades ago. Peace.
1 Redactor0 2017-11-20
Remember, victims of sexual assault don't always handle it in the same way. Some get on facebook and joke that they were sexually assaulted as if it hadn't actually happened and then finally come out and say it did 7 years later.
1 Ravensthrowit 2017-11-20
“Menz said she wanted to share an "uncomfortable" interaction that left her feeling "gross."”
Can we please use our grownup words to describe serious situations (if you can even call this one)? Like fuck you lady, bugs are gross and icky, having a senator sliding a finger up and down your crack requires a bit more articulation for me to take you seriously