Lolcow misses joke, creates saucy pasta

47  2018-01-10 by newcomer_ts

108 comments

What? They were pimps and that's not something to aspire to. They are degenerate, abusive, misogynistic cretins. If you make your living off the sexualized, forced labour of other people, you're sick in the head.

/u/aledba To be fair, that's what those ho's get for being too retarded to hook on dey own. No wonder slapping and choking is the only thing they understand.

You need serious help.

Says the person who hates children....

Please read a dictionary, if you are capable. Where does it say 'hate' in the definition of 'childfree'? And how is my being CF relevant to anything in this post?

Look, it's ok. Just admit you don't understand how people work, you can't be around kids because of your crippling aspergers, and you have serious issues when it comes to street smarts. We get it.

We all know that r/childfree is a cryptohate sub and that every poster there would love nothing more than to see a childicide happen in their lifetimes. The reason this is relevant is because you suggested someone else should get some help when you’re an active user in that hate filled infanticide advocating trash heap.

We all know

Who the fuck are 'we'? Childfree doesn't add up to 'child killer'. You're extremely disturbed if that's your take away. Your mind went there. The CF community's does not. If anything, we are huge advocates for wanted children being taken care of by responsible, stable people. I do Big Brothers/Sisters. I am the one who plays with all the little cousins at the park while their (younger than me) parents sit around and chain smoke. I am the one sponsoring women's shelter donations and drives.

But because I don't want to procreate and identify as CF, that's an issue for you. Are your arms broken from reaching so far? Don't you have anything else on the planet that warrants your energy and misplaced rage?

I am the one who plays with all the little cousins at the park while their (younger than me) parents sit around and chain smoke. I am the one sponsoring women's shelter donations and drives.

Please don't. Reddit has enough child killers in its history as it is.

Wow your poor family members don't know what kind of psycho monster is playing with their kids. /r/childfree is a violence obsessed cult as seen by that prolific childfree poster following through on all your calls to violence and actually killing his kid. You need serious therapy you dangerous degenerate

I don't want to procreate

Thank god!

She is doing her part for the mayocide!

Assuming she is white

I don't want to procreate

Literally your only positive contribution to the human race.

Hey Casey anthony, we get it.

Loool

That's disgusting. She needs to be ended. It's sad you don't know the weight of words.

she needs to be ended

Why are you so passionate about murdering women and children? Is that what intergalactic feminism is?

I somewhat unironically agreed with something being called cryptohate, please direct me to the nearest rope and crude chair.

I heard a plugged in toaster and a full bathtub is more effective tbh

But don't put it in the tub until White Rabbit peaks.

r/childfree

Literally fucking crazy irl

Pick two

Maybe you’re white and doing her part for the mayocide?

Mayos not reproducing is the quickest way to complete the mayocide.

If that’s the case /r/drama will support you fully.

I won't deny that white people suck and need to stop popping out kids.

Unless it's a Tom Petty song, likely not. Fail.

it is actually a 36 Mafia cover of one of Toms lesser known songs. It was such a good cover that they decided a Grammy was not prestigious enough so they gave it an Oscar.

Both a dedicated CF user and a Tom Petty fan. Next you're going to tell me you're "curvy" and live in some flyover city in Canada.

She said she's in an open marriage, so fatty status is confirmed.

open marriage

ew

Tom Petty was pretty good

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Yeah, pimping ain't easy, so some help is needed sometimes. Maybe he should hire a secretary.

[deleted]

Pimpin ain't easy

/u/aledba, pimps up hoes down.

With any luck, you'll meet your end soon.

You keep yourself safe too.

What color is your hair, and how overweight are you

Plaid hair and I am about the weight of 3 owls in a full length raincoat.

I think this counts as birdposting

Welcome comrade

Oh, it was dramatic enough for the prepubescent masses?

[deleted]

We just like birds. .

I'm twenty-six and a half years old, thank you very much.

26 years old

haven't hit puberty

🤔

He's a late bloomer.

A little too late ayyy

That's a cute little gif.

Rude, IMO.

With any luck, you'll meet your end soon.

W E W L A D
E
W
L
A
D

LMAO

Spicy

what a whore-ible thing to say to someone

> ese

> Canadian sub

What

I love South Park too much.

Stop commoditizing Spanish culture, whitey

OMG, culturul appropriation.

I'm quoting South Park, dimwit.

Well I can quote NWA, I still can't get away with saying "nigger"

Pimps up, hos down. Before you spaz out, don't worry I am quoting ASAP Rocky.

That's obvious. You probably think you're Rocky.

/u/aledba this is a bussy sub. no one here wants to commoditize your gussy. that's creepy and gross and super problematic tbqhf.

I was discussing the cretins featured in the original article and commenting on how being a pimp is not 'cool'. Melt away, broflake! Guaranteed that none of you are even legal. You are acting with less maturity than most toddlers. The commoditization of people is wrong and it's not funny. Ever.

To those who came here from the crosspost on /r/drama because you have nothing better to do with your time. Try learning to respect women. We are not a commodity.

That was addressed to the pimps in the article? Really? Are you sure? And again, no one here wants your gross gussy. Maybe try peddling it on backpage or something.

> Guaranteed that none of you are even legal.

> evaluating people in terms of whether you can fuck them or not

> The commoditization of people is wrong and it's not funny. Ever.

🤔🤔🤔

Cute. I'm alluding to the fact that none of you are going to be having sex with anyone soon since you're all 8 year old boys.

Somehow not surprised you spend you entire day thinking about having sex with 8 year old boys.

Tell me, is your childfree stance similar to those of noted male feminists such as Josh Whedon? You know, just a cover for your sexual deviancy?

Intersectional feminist

has sex

Pick one

You and me can practice if you like. Do a little roleplay where I pretend to get you pregnant and punch you in the gut after.

Or the same thing but no pretending.

This is my fetish

I shagged yer nan last nite, m8

[deleted]

Lmao how are you allowed on the internet unsupervised by your handlers?

Y'know, you'll be going to bed without any PuddingPaks tonight when they find out you're being naughty online?

Oh wow, a feminist pushing the gender role of a man's worth being how much sex they've had. Colour me shocked.

Sounds like she is putting down bussy, too.

This aggression will not stand... man!

Why do you keep putting down bussy?

But women aren't people, tho.

cretins

Also, if you could check your privilege and refrain from the use of ableist slurs here that would be great. Thanks!

cretins

Stop thinking you're cool please

being a pimp is not 'cool'

Have some respect for black culture and their values

Melt away, broflake!

/u/The_Reason_Trump_Won

u/aledba, women aren't people. They're the NIGGERS of gender.

/u/aledba why are you such a shrieking harpy? I hope you're not like this in RL, you'll never be able to hold down a man if so.

It's easy to hold down a man if you've got enough raw mass

A woman does not exist to please or entertain men. I'm married and I date around a bit. Open marriage, what what.

Oh your husband is one of those limp nu-males?

Your husband is probably glad to just get away from the shrieking harpy that he has at home at least. Honestly though, what the fuck is wrong with you to spend so much time online raging at "breeders"? Thank you for not procreating though, that will probably be the only worthwhile thing you will ever contribute to mankind.

I'm married and I date around a bit. Open marriage, what what.

Ok, you're hitting all the caricature buttons. This must be a dedicated troll.

Eeeww you're cucking your husband lmao

When you marry someone that is appropriate for an upstanding intersectional feminist (as I'm sure/u/alebda is) the sex gets boring after the thousandth time of "do you consent to have your left breast groped? Do you enthusiastically consent? Do you consent to me pulling my pants off? Do you enthusiastically consent?"

Am I being detained???

When you're in an open marriage, you're both consenting and often both dating around. Get over yourself.

Is it really consent if you're both completely fucked in the head?

How much gas did you huff to post like this?

You cannot be very stable, I am certain.

Stable? As in structurally something sound? I'm 6'6" and fucking jacked babe.

Stable, as in, mentally sound. I don't care if you're the Rock.

I got rocks for brains babe, can't get more stable than that.

The meaning of the idiom is that you're stupid. o_0

Yeah well, heh, you're an idiom babe.

married to a cuck

Not surprised. Was one of these bruthas your bull? Is that the reason for all the salt? Wuz he your kang? Ho's be trippin.

Yeah but why? Why are you married but then decide you can "date around a bit"? It really defeats the entire purpose of a marriage. Basically, your marriage is a dysfunctional sham.

Pretty much proves my point that poly and swingers are just a bunch of fat and lazy fuckers who are too weak willed to actually tackle relationship issues as they come up. /u/aledba please justify your dysfunctional and headed for divorce marriage please

Obviously she's married so she can legally leech of some dude while she "finds herself", which conveniently doesn't include maintaining gainful employment.

That's cute. People can live and have their marriages the way they see fit. You weren't invited to play with us. You do you.

That's cute. Smugly implying that anyone would care or even want to be involved in your weirdo marriage fetish. But you do you. Have you at the very least, contacted a divorce attorney on your own behalf? Also your husband doesn't love you, he resents you.

So you actually cuck your hubby (not in the t_d sense) I hope your bull is at least a POC.

/u/aledba wtf is wrong with you? How can you say you would rather see children dead than women? JFC.

Never did. You're a warty toad.

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idk what intersectional feminism is

it means cucking your husband.

It's a synonym for retarded lady who cucks her man.

i can't find the original xpost famalams

She forgot to mention the cute little sea lions.

Torontonians love multiculturalism and a foreign invasions in general. That's why we are right at home in there