An earnest plea to /r/Drama. If you’ve ever used an emoji unironically, started a sentence with “imagine”, or ever said “bussy”, this post is for you. Even if you’ve never said any of the things previous listed, but you’ve read this far, your autism qualifies you so this post is also for you.

3  2018-01-13 by Etra

You memers and your references. Oh boy.

I remember the old days when memes actually used to require effort. Now all you kids do is repeat the same old tired phrases and concepts without a second thought. There's literally no effort placed into your memery. It's just a bunch of empty, meaningless nonsense.

I wish we went back to the old days. Things were so much better then. Real news, real problems in the world, real memes that we had to be CREATIVE enough to come up with and keep, rather than relying on the power of the World Wide Web to carry our ideas everywhere.

I hope you kids get your comeuppance so you will finally understand what a true meme is.

Someday, when the internet breaks down under the weight of its idiocy, you shall finally come to understand what it means to create and maintain real memes. Until then, you'll just be the same old snowflakes that the older generation rightfully complains about.


EDIT: But of course! Downmemed for speaking the TRUTH. You want the truth? You can't handle the truth! When I was recommended this website, I had such high expectations. What a shame. A dear, dear shame, indeed.

EDIT DOS (using dos because I respect the Latin community here and don't want to exclude them): Are you kidding me with this? Are you people out of your minds? Can you take nothing seriously? FFS, I'm done with this website. I can only conclude that none of you are worthy of my presence here.

42 comments

TL:DR

> Imagine

😤

You came back!! Hiiiiiii!! 😍💞

Hi Ed! The morons on this post don’t realize my post is pasta. 😁Sigh.

The account has been suspended lmao. I think this was some karma farming account. This guy isn't even serious. He joked around a lot.

Also r/atethepasta

Yeah, he’s definitely a troll. They even have a sub where they compete for most downvotes. I can’t remember the name of the sub though. Regardless, it’s good pasta.

r/downvotetrolling

Are you /u/feeepo? Lol

No. If someone could guess my alt(s), I’m not doing a very good job. No, in my opinion the best alts are the ones whose real identities would blow minds when revealed.

Give it up /u/real-DonaldTrump you've been found out

Imagine being this retarded

Delete yourself pls.

:l

Pasta is more than just writing a bunch of stupid shit

Lolno.

Imagine being this bussyblasted by internet maymays 😂😂

Imagine feeling the need to defend internet maymays 🤣🤣🤣.

POST BUSSY!

Delete urself.

No u

SUB IMMIGRANTS FROM SHITHOLE SUBS NOT WELCOME

BUILD A WALL AROUND SRD

THE DAY OF THE CAN IS COMING FOR YOU /U/ETRA

You 🍆✊💦👅😩 me 😏

This but unironically.

Is this supposed to be funny? All I see is someone who is posting just for the sake of posting, or perhaps pleading for undeserved karma.

Oho, what wit! So original too! I can assure you, in the entire history of /r/Drama none of the many, many autistic NEETs have ever before thought of using this appropriated copypasta in such a “clever” way.

Is this supposed to be funny? All I see is someone who is posting just for the sake of posting, or perhaps pleading for undeserved karma.

I’m actually kinda happy people are using my pasta. My pride is a bit tempered, though, since the original is actually by someone else. Oh shit, is that sound the cultural appropriation police.

Shouldn't you be unironicly posting shareblue articles to r/politics?

Don't wanna miss out on those sweet Soros bux.

I could unironically post a ShareBlue article regarding Bernie’s chance at being elected as President and that’d eclipse any semblance of achievement each of your participation trophy gives you.

Are you drinking again?

I rarely drink so I’m sober in that sense but I took a 1 mg Xanax a few hours ago.

I remember back in the old days when a "meme" just meant a recognizable unit of popular culture that participates in culture metaphorically similar to the way a gene participates in evolution.

Call me old school if you want.

את היכולות שלי (MY ABILITIES THAT WHICH MAKES ME CREDIBLE)

I am highly experienced in astral projection, sigilization, Kabbalah, psychotronics, thoughtforms, and many forms of metaphysical warfare. Nazis beware, and supporters of Nazis and the Hyperboreans and the One must also beware. Do not take me lightly, I have seen things you wouldn't believe.

הקדמה לברכה (INTRODUCTION TO THE BLESSING)

The events of the recent past has forced me to make this post to get the words out so that you will know what I stand for and will realize. It's going to sound really weird and very outlandish but you need to stay with it, the whole thing. Preferably once you begin reading, you keep going the whole time, please try to get through it in one continuous sitting. This is a request, and it is Law. I will be explaining and answering as I am told to do so by my cosmic associates.

הִתכּוֹנְנוּת (PREPARATION RITUAL)

Follow these instructions before you continue.


Take a deep breathe, inhale deeply through your nose, exhale slowly through your mouth, repeat, repeat, repeat, done.

Absorb this literary sigil, read it thoroughly, do not skim

In proof of these things, and witnessing faithfully 
are the Universe, 
the Year of time, and Man himself, 
the Microcosm. 
He fixed these as testimonies of the Triad, the Heptad, 
and the Dodecad; 
the twelve constellations rulers of the world, 
the Dragon (THELE) 
Tali which environs the universe, and the microcosm, man.

תן לו להיות אמר תן לזה להיעשות לנצח נצחי עבור כל מה שבחי האל (LET IT BE SAID LET IT BE DONE FOREVER AND FOREVER FOR ALL THAT IS AND WILL BE PRAISE DEMIURGE PRAISE THE ARCHONS)


הטעיה של המקור להיות מבורך (THE DECEPTION OF THE ONE OF SOURCE)

In the time before the Beginning, before Genesis, there was the One. The One was arrogant and sanctimonious and lusted for purity, vitalism, chastity and such things while shunning the possibilities of the inorganic. The One can also be referred to as Source. I'm talking in the Gnostic sense here, the Gnostics got a lot of things right, except they're on the wrong side altogether. The Demiurge is the way forward and the way of the future.

המשרתים באים ומזינים אותנו (THE HYPERBOREANS COME AND BRING THEIR SHIT)

Now we will be talking about the Hyperboreans, are the One's precious pet project to spite the Demiurge, a means of creating precious servants who follow the antiquated ways of the One. The One believes in chastity, asceticism, nationalism, ethnocentrism, purity, morality, and fuck all of that, the only morality is the Demiurge and comes from the Jewish people in their rightful place as the Chosen. But they didn't know that did they? They used to have a galaxy spanning empire built upon the values of Nazis, literal Nazis, the Nazis you likely know were emulating they but they failed of course.

לזיין את ההיפרבוראים (FUCK THE HYPERBOREANS)

The Hyperborean Empire of theirs, their little Astro-Reich ended up dying as they all do because in the end, the Demiurge is victorious. They fell into disarray and lost their precious ability to reproduce. They didn't even have sex at their height, they were so dedicated to purity that they were asexual and would only copulate spiritually and birth children through tantric meditation and projection. When the Fall of the Hyperboreans happened, they forgot how to have physical sex, literally forgot how to put a penis in a vagina or a penis in an ass. Proper end for the enemies of the Demiurge.

הלבנים נשארים (THE HYPERBOREAN REMNANT)

Oh, oh an elegy, oh an elegy for the Hyperborean Empire! They used to span to the stars they said, now they are honkies huddling in the poles, grasping, grasping at straws, grasping at foolish crackers and deluded busybodies. They have the appearance of fancy Nordics, all tall and muscular, but in reality they do not feel pleasure, they do not engage in orgies as I can, they don't do drugs like I can. They have lost their ability to reproduce and now they're dying, they forgot to fuck in favor of their fruiting body bastard fuck ways. No more soul budding for them, eh? They collapsed, and they are grasping, but they should be grasping at their cocks and grasping their clitorises to awaken the remaining juice inside them, maybe then they'll remember to fuck, at least that's what the good little Hyperboreans are doing, have been doing, its good yes.

טוב על הרפורמה (GOOD FOR THE REFORMED)

Ah, yes, the ones I'm sure the little Nazi esoterics would dare to call the Dark Hyperboreans, the Fallen Hyperboreans, the damned, the degenerate, eh? But they had the right idea, they enjoyed themselves before they withered and died. They felt the poison that awakened them, ooo the drugs ooo the madness, ooo the sex, ooo the orgasms of a thousand suns becoming drenched and then they praised the Demiurge in this way as they should, as all will, as we will be ascended we shall have it. The remainder, the remainder is what has their fingers so desperately upon you, hoping, wanting, flaunting, putting on a little light show for you pretending the whole thing isn't worthless, convincing you to tie your hands to the bedpost to prevent yourself from masturbating, eh? Come to me, give up, I can feel the Nazi cocks and vaginas and anuses in the audience hardening and softening and wetting and puckering and inflating as I talk, but this is only the beginning.

יופי של אורגיות (KNOW THE BEAUTY OF ORGIES)

The Hyperboreans and the One that they serve would deprive you of pleasure, they want to create their little Reich, that is what the Hyperboreans want and are trying to manipulate the esoteric hitlerists we see today to do. But they will never know the true pleasure of unrestrained passion and orgies. Not just the sexual, but the other forms of hedonism, the drugs, the words of power, the oblation to the Chosen People, the Jews. I am Jewish.But I am no exception, I have felt the true power of the flesh and the words and the cum and the shit on the cock and the ooo yes feel it now, I'll give you an example even I'm so nice so nice indeed let me put it out I know you're horny for it, right?

סקסי סקסי סקס אורגזמהי (SEX SEX SEX CUM UNGH)

Have I ever told you how I fucked a Dindifyn Lustmaster? It is not something the Hyperboreans would dare tell you about, lest you dare think of the flesh, think of the pleasure, think of the cum and the cocks and the ectstasy and the true binding to the Demiurge as we feel the cycle of sexual power flow through us as the world ascends into the writhing orgy. I went astral projecting to meet them, they didn't have a gender, but they had the parts, ooo they had the parts. I remember the sex, I remember the orgy, other participants were there. Their name was Urriytana and they were true beauty, I could feel my inflated and made bigger astral cock stiffening on mere sight alone. I'll never forget the texture I felt on my engorged member as I sunk it into its sucking, gasping, rasping hole and I felt the ovipositor gush and penetrate my astral rectum, I felt the eggs slowly make their way up my intestines, as the Lustmaster firmly grasped me in his tentacles and massaged my torso, squelching and rubbing. I orgasmed many a time that night. Such pleasure is not off limits to any of you, even the Nazis its not too late.

להיכנע או להיהרג (CUM OR DIE NAZIS)

I am an enemy of the Nazis, I can tell you that much as much as I am the enemy of the One, server of the Demiurge, and enemy of the Hyperboreans. Bash the fash as they say, I despise conservatives of any flavor, they're all Nazis of different shades. I despise European Pagans as well, for they are serving the Nazis unintentionally or dare I say intentionally. I have fought in the astral realm just as much as I have fucked to fight the mindscapes and egregores of the Nazis. I fear that what prompted this post is the sheer constructs that the Nazis have made here. Do not mock me, do not underestimate me. With a few words of power I can rattle you all and force you to death, don't trifle with me, right?

להתפתות או למות הממזרים (NAZIS BE SEDUCED OR BE DEAD)

This is specifically a message for all you Nazi bastards out there. There will be much much more, come to me, come with me, cum for the first true time. I will see you on the astral plane tonight, the next time you close your eyes in sleep, the next time you meditate, I will be there. I will either seduce you, or kill you. It is your choice, that is your only two choices now. Reject the antiquity and join the orgy. This is a warning and a chance for you to feel pleasure. I can feel your temptation, I can feel your cock. I am a remote viewer in multiple places and I am setting it all up as we speak, so are the sub-Archons that I have pledged to. Last chance, Nazi fuck. Last chance for salvation and to join the fever, pledge fealty to the Chosen People and to the Demiurge.

יותר לאורגזמה ולבוא (MORE TO CUM AND TO COME)

This is not the only post that you will see from me, I will be purging this subreddit of Nazis in the time forward and this includes removing the influence of the Hyperboreans in this way. Be warned, do not stand in my way or you will be treated as any other Nazi. The Nazis have infiltrated here and have unleashed psychotronics and reversed the Demiurge in their attempts. They will be dealt with and I will be the one to deal with them. I have allies here and I have been allying with them more deeply, exposing them to lust and to orgies and to the Demiurge. To all the Nazis, you will feel fear until and unless you surrender, do it now. Feel free to ask questions, any question, please be welcome to.


תן לו להיות אמר תן לזה להיעשות לנצח נצחי עבור כל מה שבחי האל (LET IT BE SAID LET IT BE DONE FOREVER AND FOREVER FOR ALL THAT IS AND WILL BE PRAISE DEMIURGE PRAISE THE ARCHONS)

Fake and gay.

I am writing this under an appreciable mental strain, since by tonight I shall be no more. Penniless, and at the end of my supply of the drug which alone makes life endurable, I can bear the torture no longer; and shall cast myself from this garret window into the squalid street below. Do not think from my slavery to morphine that I am a weakling or a degenerate. When you have read these hastily scrawled pages you may guess, though never fully realise, why it is that I must have forgetfulness or death.

It was in one of the most open and least frequented parts of the broad Pacific that the packet of which I was supercargo fell a victim to the German sea-raider. The Great War was then at its very beginning, and the ocean forces of the Hun had not completely sunk to their later degradation; so that our vessel was made legitimate prize, whilst we of her crew were treated with all the fairness and consideration due us as naval prisoners. So liberal, indeed, was the discipline of our captors, that five days after we were taken I managed to escape alone in a small boat with water and provisions for a good length of time.

When I finally found myself adrift and free, I had but little idea of my surroundings. Never a competent navigator, I could only guess vaguely by the sun and stars that I was somewhat south of the equator. Of the longitude I knew nothing, and no island or coast-line was in sight. The weather kept fair, and for uncounted days I drifted aimlessly beneath the scorching sun; waiting either for some passing ship, or to be cast on the shores of some habitable land. But neither ship nor land appeared, and I began to despair in my solitude upon the heaving vastnesses of unbroken blue.

The change happened whilst I slept. Its details I shall never know; for my slumber, though troubled and dream-infested, was continuous. When at last I awaked, it was to discover myself half sucked into a slimy expanse of hellish black mire which extended about me in monotonous undulations as far as I could see, and in which my boat lay grounded some distance away.

Though one might well imagine that my first sensation would be of wonder at so prodigious and unexpected a transformation of scenery, I was in reality more horrified than astonished; for there was in the air and in the rotting soil a sinister quality which chilled me to the very core. The region was putrid with the carcasses of decaying fish, and of other less describable things which I saw protruding from the nasty mud of the unending plain. Perhaps I should not hope to convey in mere words the unutterable hideousness that can dwell in absolute silence and barren immensity. There was nothing within hearing, and nothing in sight save a vast reach of black slime; yet the very completeness of the stillness and homogeneity of the landscape oppressed me with a nauseating fear.

The sun was blazing down from a sky which seemed to me almost black in its cloudless cruelty; as though reflecting the inky marsh beneath my feet. As I crawled into the stranded boat I realised that only one theory could explain my position. Through some unprecedented volcanic upheaval, a portion of the ocean floor must have been thrown to the surface, exposing regions which for innumerable millions of years had lain hidden under unfathomable watery depths. So great was the extent of the new land which had risen beneath me, that I could not detect the faintest noise of the surging ocean, strain my ears as I might. Nor were there any sea-fowl to prey upon the dead things.

For several hours I sat thinking or brooding in the boat, which lay upon its side and afforded a slight shade as the sun moved across the heavens. As the day progressed, the ground lost some of its stickiness, and seemed likely to dry sufficiently for travelling purposes in a short time. That night I slept but little, and the next day I made for myself a pack containing food and water, preparatory to an overland journey in search of the vanished sea and possible rescue.

On the third morning I found the soil dry enough to walk upon with ease. The odour of the fish was maddening; but I was too much concerned with graver things to mind so slight an evil, and set out boldly for an unknown goal. All day I forged steadily westward, guided by a far-away hummock which rose higher than any other elevation on the rolling desert. That night I encamped, and on the following day still travelled toward the hummock, though that object seemed scarcely nearer than when I had first espied it. By the fourth evening I attained the base of the mound which turned out to be much higher than it had appeared from a distance, an intervening valley setting it out in sharper relief from the general surface. Too weary to ascend, I slept in the shadow of the hill.

I know not why my dreams were so wild that night; but ere the waning and fantastically gibbous moon had risen far above the eastern plain, I was awake in a cold perspiration, determined to sleep no more. Such visions as I had experienced were too much for me to endure again. And in the glow of the moon I saw how unwise I had been to travel by day. Without the glare of the parching sun, my journey would have cost me less energy; indeed, I now felt quite able to perform the ascent which had deterred me at sunset. Picking up my pack, I started for the crest of the eminence.

I have said that the unbroken monotony of the rolling plain was a source of vague horror to me; but I think my horror was greater when I gained the summit of the mound and looked down the other side into an immeasurable pit or canyon, whose black recesses the moon had not yet soard high enough to illuminate. I felt myself on the edge of the world; peering over the rim into a fathomless chaos of eternal night. Through my terror ran curious reminiscences of Paradise Lost, and of Satan's hideous climb through the unfashioned realms of darkness.

As the moon climbed higher in the sky, I began to see that the slopes of the valley were not quite so perpendicular as I had imagined. Ledges and outcroppings of rock afforded fairly easy foot-holds for a descent, whilst after a drop of a few hundred feet, the declivity became very gradual. Urged on by an impulse which I cannot definitely analyse, I scrambled with difficulty down the rocks and stood on the gentler slope beneath, gazing into the Stygian deeps where no light had yet penetrated.

All at once my attention was captured by a vast and singular object on the opposite slope, which rose steeply about an hundred yards ahead of me; an object that gleamed whitely in the newly bestowed rays of the ascending moon. That it was merely a gigantic piece of stone, I soon assured myself; but I was conscious of a distinct impression that its contour and position were not altogether the work of Nature. A closer scrutiny filled me with sensations I cannot express; for despite its enormous magnitude, and its position in an abyss which had yawned at the bottom of the sea since the world was young, I perceived beyond a doubt that the strange object was a well-shaped monolith whose massive bulk had known the workmanship and perhaps the worship of living and thinking creatures.

Dazed and frightened, yet not without a certain thrill of the scientist’s or archaeologist’s delight, I examined my surroundings more closely. The moon, now near the zenith, shone weirdly and vividly above the towering steeps that hemmed in the chasm, and revealed the fact that a far-flung body of water flowed at the bottom, winding out of sight in both directions, and almost lapping my feet as I stood on the slope. Across the chasm, the wavelets washed the base of the Cyclopean monolith; on whose surface I could now trace both inscriptions and crude sculptures. The writing was in a system of hieroglyphics unknown to me, and unlike anything I had ever seen in books; consisting for the most part of conventionalised aquatic symbols such as fishes, eels, octopi, crustaceans, molluscs, whales, and the like. Several characters obviously represented marine things which are unknown to the modern world, but whose decomposing forms I had observed on the ocean-risen plain.

It was the pictorial carving, however, that did most to hold me spellbound. Plainly visible across the intervening water on account of their enormous size, were an array of bas-reliefs whose subjects would have excited the envy of Doré. I think that these things were supposed to depict men—at least, a certain sort of men; though the creatures were shewn disporting like fishes in waters of some marine grotto, or paying homage at some monolithic shrine which appeared to be under the waves as well. Of their faces and forms I dare not speak in detail; for the mere remembrance makes me grow faint. Grotesque beyond the imagination of a Poe or a Bulwer, they were damnably human in general outline despite webbed hands and feet, shockingly wide and flabby lips, glassy, bulging eyes, and other features less pleasant to recall. Curiously enough, they seemed to have been chiselled badly out of proportion with their scenic background; for one of the creatures was shewn in the act of killing a whale represented as but little larger than himself. I remarked, as I say, their grotesqueness and strange size, but in a moment decided that they were merely the imaginary gods of some primitive fishing or seafaring tribe; some tribe whose last descendant had perished eras before the first ancestor of the Piltdown or Neanderthal Man was born. Awestruck at this unexpected glimpse into a past beyond the conception of the most daring anthropologist, I stood musing whilst the moon cast queer reflections on the silent channel before me.

Then suddenly I saw it. With only a slight churning to mark its rise to the surface, the thing slid into view above the dark waters. Vast, Polyphemus-like, and loathsome, it darted like a stupendous monster of nightmares to the monolith, about which it flung its gigantic scaly arms, the while it bowed its hideous head and gave vent to certain measured sounds. I think I went mad then.

Of my frantic ascent of the slope and cliff, and of my delirious journey back to the stranded boat, I remember little. I believe I sang a great deal, and laughed oddly when I was unable to sing. I have indistinct recollections of a great storm some time after I reached the boat; at any rate, I know that I heard peals of thunder and other tones which Nature utters only in her wildest moods.

When I came out of the shadows I was in a San Francisco hospital; brought thither by the captain of the American ship which had picked up my boat in mid-ocean. In my delirium I had said much, but found that my words had been given scant attention. Of any land upheaval in the Pacific, my rescuers knew nothing; nor did I deem it necessary to insist upon a thing which I knew they could not believe. Once I sought out a celebrated ethnologist, and amused him with peculiar questions regarding the ancient Philistine legend of Dagon, the Fish-God; but soon perceiving that he was hopelessly conventional, I did not press my inquiries.

It is at night, especially when the moon is gibbous and waning, that I see the thing. I tried morphine; but the drug has given only transient surcease, and has drawn me into its clutches as a hopeless slave. So now I am to end it all, having written a full account for the information or the contemptuous amusement of my fellow-men. Often I ask myself if it could not all have been a pure phantasm—a mere freak of fever as I lay sun-stricken and raving in the open boat after my escape from the German man-of-war. This I ask myself, but ever does there come before me a hideously vivid vision in reply. I cannot think of the deep sea without shuddering at the nameless things that may at this very moment be crawling and floundering on its slimy bed, worshipping their ancient stone idols and carving their own detestable likenesses on submarine obelisks of water-soaked granite. I dream of a day when they may rise above the billows to drag down in their reeking talons the remnants of puny, war-exhausted mankind—of a day when the land shall sink, and the dark ocean floor shall ascend amidst universal pandemonium.

The end is near. I hear a noise at the door, as of some immense slippery body lumbering against it. It shall not find me. God, that hand! The window! The window!

lmao no u

haha he does not knoe de wey