An Open Invitation to Aziz Ansari: I will give you the nut that you deserved
187 2018-01-17 by EzraKleinVox
Dear Aziz,
I'm deeply sorry that you had to deal with an entitled mayo woman who didn't even have the courtesy to suck you to completion after you bought her dinner, bought her wine, and even ate her pussy. All you got in return was a half-assed blowjob and an accusation of rape on some retarded millenial website.
Well Aziz, I'm here to tell you that it doesn't have to be that way. Allow me to give you the orgasm you deserve. Using only my tight boy hole and a quart of crisco I will bring you to mind blowing climax. I wont cry rape, I won't expect commitment, you don't even have to take me to dinner. If you prefer you can even nail a sheet to a door frame, cut a hole in it, and stick through your olive drab Indian pickle for me to work on.
You are probably thinking, "but wait, I like vagina". That's only because you haven't experienced the ultimate pleasure of my, hot, tight manhole. Expand your horizons, free yourself from the treacherous gussy. I'm here for you my little prince.
34 comments
1 T_Dumbsford-Is-Sexy 2018-01-17
This but unironically lol. Source?
1 EzraKleinVox 2018-01-17
I am the source. This is not a joke fam.
1 Ed_ButteredToast 2018-01-17
https://i.imgur.com/p7Qaff1.gif
1 DistortedLines 2018-01-17
Aww
1 OkThatsProblematic 2018-01-17
https://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/d/de/EzraKleinCropped.jpg
You don't even have to close your eyes and hum. This soy is pure and fresh, with a squeaky vocal fry that will enchant even the meanest of outlaw bikers.
1 Ed_ButteredToast 2018-01-17
He's hot in other pictures idk 💁♀️
1 OkThatsProblematic 2018-01-17
I had you figuered for a power bottom
1 shallowm 2018-01-17
It's not the same word-for-word, but it drew inspiration from this.
1 wwyzzerdd 2018-01-17
Never trust a gussy.
Gussy will lie.
Gussy will steal.
Gussy will crush your soul.
1 Velvet_Llama 2018-01-17
Preach.
1 Justinat0r 2018-01-17
Almighty God wasn't happy with gussy, neither am I.
1 DeescalateWithABJ 2018-01-17
1 backltrack 2018-01-17
Explain this account pls
1 DeescalateWithABJ 2018-01-17
Based on a twincel recent post, "Grace" was trying to de-escalate her supposed rape/sexual assault by Aziz by giving him a Blow Job.
So now I'd like to remind people that you can deescalate horrible situations in this manner.
It's all about education.
1 backltrack 2018-01-17
Ohh ok. Didn't put two and two together. Keep up the good work
1 FrostBittenSalsa 2018-01-17
Everyone knows only u/RedRose996 can give the based poo-in-the-loo the S U C C of peace and deescalate this crisis
1 ohjdslkjflaskdnf 2018-01-17
I heard /u/RedRose996 is really bad a deescalating.
1 FrostBittenSalsa 2018-01-17
There's only one way to settle this dilemma. u/RedRose996 must suck off the entirety of r/drama to find out the truth about her devil gussy powers
1 giroth 2018-01-17
Guys this is bully
Pls stop
1 FrostBittenSalsa 2018-01-17
Shut your whore mouth, non believer
1 LSU_Coonass 2018-01-17
points at bussy
1 Fucking_That_Chicken 2018-01-17
/u/azizansariAMA I think you should take him up on this
1 wonderful_wonton 2018-01-17
It's the only way to save his future senate seat!
1 westofthetracks 2018-01-17
This but ironically lol. Source?
1 IAintThatGuy 2018-01-17
Then pull an Ansari on him and rape his ass.
1 OkThatsProblematic 2018-01-17
Too far. This isn't a French shitholè
1 Honk4Tits 2018-01-17
What's you feeling about him using "the claw"?
1 I_poop_in_The_Dark 2018-01-17
This is big. Is there a petition I can sign to get Aziz to beat up the bussy?
1 Chin_Up_Chick 2018-01-17
Back off, Aziz Ansari is mine.
1 catraccoon 2018-01-17
grace was mayo ? i assumed she was sheltered asian
1 AbbyNierman 2018-01-17
>implying you could ever be a better lay than an entitled white woman
1 EWDnutz 2018-01-17
Isn't grace a yellow type of mayo?
1 grungebot5000 2018-01-17
OH
so that's who "Grace" was
1 AnnArchist 2018-01-17
Since were doing open invitations - /r/Drama meetup on Lake of the Woods this week til Thursday. Show up nerds and come ice catching.