I [28M] have been dating my SO [26F] for 3 months. She is the sweetest thing on Earth. We love each other to death. BUT my dad is vehemently against us being together, because her dad is mentally challenged. I'm at a complete loss of what to do.
TL;DR: My dad hates my girlfriend before he's even met her, because her dad is mentally challenged.
This girl (let's call her Amy) and I have been together for a relatively short time. But in these 3 short months, we've spent nearly every other day with each other, talking on the phone every day that we don't see each other. We've discussed nearly every topic under the sun (past, future, marriage, kids, careers, family, hopes, fears). We bond and mesh on so many different levels (music, style, parenting, scientific-minded, random stuff). Amy cooks for me and takes care of me in many small ways. I've met her family (cousins, godparents), and she's met my family (mom, aunts, cousins). My mom absolutely loves her. Amy is the best thing that has happened to me ever.
But there's one big hiccup. My dad disapproves of us being together. He hasn't met Amy yet, but he already legitimately hates her guts. Why, you ask? Because Amy's dad is mentally challenged (genetic?). Amy on the other hand, is ridiculously smart. She did well academically, is very successful in her career, and is possibly mentally sharper than I am.
I thought I was being a good son by being honest with my dad, and letting him know beforehand of my GF's dad. Big oops. I hadn't expected my dad to react like that, and my dad now believes that Amy is going to cause me a life full of risk and stress if we ever get married (having to take care of her dad, her possibly having a higher genetic chance of displaying the same symptoms, or passing the genes onto our children).
My dad is skipping over all of Amy's amazing qualities even before meeting her, and automatically antagonizing Amy due to no fault of her own (no one can choose who their father/mother is). I'm now afraid of letting my dad meet Amy because he might say something to heavily offend her, and ultimately drive her away from me. I love Amy completely. There is no one who has made me as happy as Amy does, and the last thing I want is to lose her.
My dad even went as far as repeatedly insulting my mom for supporting our relationship. I haven't talked to my dad in weeks, and I'm questioning if he ever had my best interests at heart.
I understand that this situation is partly my fault (for pouring this information on my dad so early). I'm just at a complete loss of how to proceed now. Thanks to anyone who can give me feedback.
3 comments
1 fuckyourcontext 2018-03-21
I [28M] have been dating my SO [26F] for 3 months. She is the sweetest thing on Earth. We love each other to death. BUT my dad is vehemently against us being together, because her dad is mentally challenged. I'm at a complete loss of what to do.
TL;DR: My dad hates my girlfriend before he's even met her, because her dad is mentally challenged.
This girl (let's call her Amy) and I have been together for a relatively short time. But in these 3 short months, we've spent nearly every other day with each other, talking on the phone every day that we don't see each other. We've discussed nearly every topic under the sun (past, future, marriage, kids, careers, family, hopes, fears). We bond and mesh on so many different levels (music, style, parenting, scientific-minded, random stuff). Amy cooks for me and takes care of me in many small ways. I've met her family (cousins, godparents), and she's met my family (mom, aunts, cousins). My mom absolutely loves her. Amy is the best thing that has happened to me ever.
But there's one big hiccup. My dad disapproves of us being together. He hasn't met Amy yet, but he already legitimately hates her guts. Why, you ask? Because Amy's dad is mentally challenged (genetic?). Amy on the other hand, is ridiculously smart. She did well academically, is very successful in her career, and is possibly mentally sharper than I am.
I thought I was being a good son by being honest with my dad, and letting him know beforehand of my GF's dad. Big oops. I hadn't expected my dad to react like that, and my dad now believes that Amy is going to cause me a life full of risk and stress if we ever get married (having to take care of her dad, her possibly having a higher genetic chance of displaying the same symptoms, or passing the genes onto our children).
My dad is skipping over all of Amy's amazing qualities even before meeting her, and automatically antagonizing Amy due to no fault of her own (no one can choose who their father/mother is). I'm now afraid of letting my dad meet Amy because he might say something to heavily offend her, and ultimately drive her away from me. I love Amy completely. There is no one who has made me as happy as Amy does, and the last thing I want is to lose her.
My dad even went as far as repeatedly insulting my mom for supporting our relationship. I haven't talked to my dad in weeks, and I'm questioning if he ever had my best interests at heart.
I understand that this situation is partly my fault (for pouring this information on my dad so early). I'm just at a complete loss of how to proceed now. Thanks to anyone who can give me feedback.
1 fuckyourcontext 2018-03-21
lol
1 YameteOniichanItai 2018-03-21
Poor guy, it's not Amy's fault that her father is a SRD mod.