It's shit like this that makes my life worse as a Eurasian because even if you look amazing you're still a subhuman because Asian women happily marry guys who look like they've been in industrial accidents over an Asian guy. It makes Asian looking males look like the worst fucking losers on earth. The guy is absolutely offensive to look at. Like his face literally makes my stomach churl because he's so ugly. I'd even be mad if he had a white girlfriend People feel they have the liberty to say of course your dad is white. Because white guys see shit like this where some fucking quasimodo looking freak can get Asian girls and they use it as ammo as to how shittyy asian guys are...
holy shit, I never thought I'd get the chance to tell this story. I can't tell people in real life because they will never believe me, and I guess you guys will probably call me a liar too, but whatever.
I went on a date with Taylor Swift before she got super famous. It was right out of high school, when she was making a name for herself, but not yet a gigantic deal. I knew her because we lived near each other. It was the craziest thing, really, I only asked her out on a dare because even not famous, she was way out of my league. But it turns out she was really nice and enjoyed the opportunity to go hang out for a while (she always had a reputation as a girl who burns the candle at both ends, and she's always stressed, so I think she just wanted to relax). It was a pretty basic "just out of high school" date. We went to see a movie and I got to feel like a jackass rolling up to her super nice house in my POS datsun honeybee. Don't let her early work fool you, she's a rich kid.
Anyway, on to the crap you guys are actually wanting to hear about. So, after the movie and some dinner, we go back to my place to listen to some music. After a while, she pretends to be interested in checking out the hiking trails out behind my house. She said she really enjoys being out in the woods, but I figured she just wanted to be away from my parents. So we get out into the woods and very quickly get into some heavy making out. Clothes go everywhere, and that's when this story starts to take its turn.
Gentlemen, I have some things to tell you about Taylor Swift. First thing: turns out she loves giving head. Pretty much the most enthusiastic beej of my life happened on that trail. She couldn't get enough. However, she's terrible at it. She's got heart, but I hope for all future guys' sakes that she took some lessons. She's all teeth, and she's got that thing where her tongue is just ridiculously rough. After a while of that, we get down to the main event. Another thing you should know about her is that she is somewhat...hairier than one might expect from a super hot rich girl. I never got to ask her what was up with that, actually. So anyway, we're getting our awkward teenage bone on, and she's just as crazy as she was before. Except this time she's just straight up clawing my back to shreds. I'm not going to pretend I didn't make it where I needed to go, but god DAMN I was expecting some kind of revelation from her. It was one of those things where it is so disappointing because you had expected so much from it.
So, after it was all said and done, we're putting our clothes back on, when I notice that I'm actually bleeding from my back. I had known she had hear heart in it, but I didn't expect for her to draw blood. But then I noticed her nails were longer and sharper than I had noticed before.
And that's when I started to put it all together.
She Clawed my back. her BJ was all teeth. She likes being in the woods. She went on a date with a guy driving a Datsun Honeybee.
Guys, Taylor Swift is a motherfucking bear.
I must have shown on my face when I put it all together, because she got a glint in her beady black eyes and roared. I didn't even bother putting my clothes back on, I just ran for dear life. Luckily, I knew the woods behind my house better than she did. Even more luckily, I was able to squeeze through some spots that her 1000lb frame just couldn't get. Winter was coming soon, I knew if she caught me I'd be killed and stuffed into the cave she cleverly disguised as an expansive suburban home so that she could keep her energy up before hibernation began. I eventually wound up hiding in a stump by a stream until she gave up and left. It was the most frightened I've ever been in my life.
TL;DR don't date burgeoning starlets. You never know who they really are.
Taylor lifts her head a little. Her voice is low in her throat, “That’s it. Tell me how good it feels”. Cara’s hands fist in her hair, trying to push her face back down, “so good,” she cries, “don’t stop.” From there it’s easy for Taylor to get the girl clenching around her fingers in a body rocking orgasm. She watches with a wolfish grin as the girl spams and tenses with the sensations, singing her praises the whole time.
A lick of her lips and she’s resurfacing, peppering soft kisses on her way up. Cara’s eyes are still tightly shut and Taylor gives her parted lips a wet kiss, slipping her a taste. Cara tries to return it but her lips are lazy, so she just hums against her mouth. Taylor’s body is aching in anticipation. It’s burning in her veins and she just wants to receive as good as she gave. Cara doesn’t disappoint. She goes down on her with enthusiasm. It’s sloppy and messy, so unlike Taylor’s precise style, but she loves it. Cara doesn’t work her fingers in a steady rhythm. It’s chaotic and unpredictable and just when Taylor thinks she can catch her breath, there’s a new shock to her system. She can’t stop her hips from bucking, or begging Cara for more. She’s completely unraveled.
12 comments
1 SnapshillBot 2018-04-16
It's shit like this that makes my life worse as a Eurasian because even if you look amazing you're still a subhuman because Asian women happily marry guys who look like they've been in industrial accidents over an Asian guy. It makes Asian looking males look like the worst fucking losers on earth. The guy is absolutely offensive to look at. Like his face literally makes my stomach churl because he's so ugly. I'd even be mad if he had a white girlfriend People feel they have the liberty to say of course your dad is white. Because white guys see shit like this where some fucking quasimodo looking freak can get Asian girls and they use it as ammo as to how shittyy asian guys are...
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1 Riley_Conway 2018-04-16
Stop posting Taylor Swift 😠
1 McFluffTheCrimeCat 2018-04-16
Ugh excuse me? how about no!
1 Starship_Litterbox_B 2018-04-16
Psshhh
1 Rachel_Hazmat 2018-04-16
holy shit, I never thought I'd get the chance to tell this story. I can't tell people in real life because they will never believe me, and I guess you guys will probably call me a liar too, but whatever.
I went on a date with Taylor Swift before she got super famous. It was right out of high school, when she was making a name for herself, but not yet a gigantic deal. I knew her because we lived near each other. It was the craziest thing, really, I only asked her out on a dare because even not famous, she was way out of my league. But it turns out she was really nice and enjoyed the opportunity to go hang out for a while (she always had a reputation as a girl who burns the candle at both ends, and she's always stressed, so I think she just wanted to relax). It was a pretty basic "just out of high school" date. We went to see a movie and I got to feel like a jackass rolling up to her super nice house in my POS datsun honeybee. Don't let her early work fool you, she's a rich kid.
Anyway, on to the crap you guys are actually wanting to hear about. So, after the movie and some dinner, we go back to my place to listen to some music. After a while, she pretends to be interested in checking out the hiking trails out behind my house. She said she really enjoys being out in the woods, but I figured she just wanted to be away from my parents. So we get out into the woods and very quickly get into some heavy making out. Clothes go everywhere, and that's when this story starts to take its turn.
Gentlemen, I have some things to tell you about Taylor Swift. First thing: turns out she loves giving head. Pretty much the most enthusiastic beej of my life happened on that trail. She couldn't get enough. However, she's terrible at it. She's got heart, but I hope for all future guys' sakes that she took some lessons. She's all teeth, and she's got that thing where her tongue is just ridiculously rough. After a while of that, we get down to the main event. Another thing you should know about her is that she is somewhat...hairier than one might expect from a super hot rich girl. I never got to ask her what was up with that, actually. So anyway, we're getting our awkward teenage bone on, and she's just as crazy as she was before. Except this time she's just straight up clawing my back to shreds. I'm not going to pretend I didn't make it where I needed to go, but god DAMN I was expecting some kind of revelation from her. It was one of those things where it is so disappointing because you had expected so much from it.
So, after it was all said and done, we're putting our clothes back on, when I notice that I'm actually bleeding from my back. I had known she had hear heart in it, but I didn't expect for her to draw blood. But then I noticed her nails were longer and sharper than I had noticed before.
And that's when I started to put it all together.
She Clawed my back. her BJ was all teeth. She likes being in the woods. She went on a date with a guy driving a Datsun Honeybee.
Guys, Taylor Swift is a motherfucking bear.
I must have shown on my face when I put it all together, because she got a glint in her beady black eyes and roared. I didn't even bother putting my clothes back on, I just ran for dear life. Luckily, I knew the woods behind my house better than she did. Even more luckily, I was able to squeeze through some spots that her 1000lb frame just couldn't get. Winter was coming soon, I knew if she caught me I'd be killed and stuffed into the cave she cleverly disguised as an expansive suburban home so that she could keep her energy up before hibernation began. I eventually wound up hiding in a stump by a stream until she gave up and left. It was the most frightened I've ever been in my life.
TL;DR don't date burgeoning starlets. You never know who they really are.
1 McFluffTheCrimeCat 2018-04-16
Hush Hush Sweetie. more breakups = more Tay.
1 DistortedLines 2018-04-16
You too!
1 McFluffTheCrimeCat 2018-04-16
<3
1 JTBebe2 2018-04-16
Is it autism?
1 Nopepole 2018-04-16
I'm sorry I couldn't take you to the moon Tay Tay...
1 unarmed_black_male 2018-04-16
Taylor lifts her head a little. Her voice is low in her throat, “That’s it. Tell me how good it feels”. Cara’s hands fist in her hair, trying to push her face back down, “so good,” she cries, “don’t stop.” From there it’s easy for Taylor to get the girl clenching around her fingers in a body rocking orgasm. She watches with a wolfish grin as the girl spams and tenses with the sensations, singing her praises the whole time.
A lick of her lips and she’s resurfacing, peppering soft kisses on her way up. Cara’s eyes are still tightly shut and Taylor gives her parted lips a wet kiss, slipping her a taste. Cara tries to return it but her lips are lazy, so she just hums against her mouth. Taylor’s body is aching in anticipation. It’s burning in her veins and she just wants to receive as good as she gave. Cara doesn’t disappoint. She goes down on her with enthusiasm. It’s sloppy and messy, so unlike Taylor’s precise style, but she loves it. Cara doesn’t work her fingers in a steady rhythm. It’s chaotic and unpredictable and just when Taylor thinks she can catch her breath, there’s a new shock to her system. She can’t stop her hips from bucking, or begging Cara for more. She’s completely unraveled.