Cool story, bro

Snapshots:

1. This Post - archive.org, megalodon.jp*, removeddit.com, archive.is

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Their toppings will be their downfall

Fucking mayos

When when they learn?

What do you think pepperoni is made of, hmm?

Really makes you think.

Is this a parody? Please tell me it is. I genuinely can't tell.

https://www.usatoday.com/story/news/2018/04/21/barbara-bush-funeral-past-presidents-pizza-makers/538363002/

Past presidents and pizzeria owners

http://houston.cbslocal.com/2018/04/19/houston-pizzeria-george-barbara-bush/

Houston Pizzeria Owners Consider George & Barbara Bush Family

What kind of honest American patronizes a local "pizzeria"?

Time for a road trip to Houston so we can pop off a few rounds into the kitchen floor.

What? Why is that a problem?

I'm talking about the comments in that thread. Outside of the stupid pizzagste shit it isn't weird to be friends with people of a completely normal profession.

it is when you're a former president. I was a Daily Show super fan during the Bush years, this would have been a huge fucking segment if Bush was best friends with a guy that ran a pizza shop. hell, imagine the SNL skits of that.

the fact that we only are now hearing about something this ridiculous should strike you as odd. Hell remember the Simpsons episode with Bush being Bart's neighbor. just that episode would mean if people knew about this guy every fucking click-bait website would have it listed as part of some "how the simpson's predicted reality" list.

you have no idea how long they've been friends, though

Or maybe it's totally normal.

Politicians try to make a lot of friends. Either it comes naturally to them, or they are always working hard to fake it.

But they don't actually meet a lot of people other than other politicians, political staff, public servants, and other assholes.

They do eat out a bit, so yeah, they happen to be friendly (or practice their people skills) with restaurateurs (and I'd guess in Bill's case waitresses).

look man, i agree snl and the daily show are trash, but even they arent so bad that they would think there was any material in something as banal as "famous retiree is friendly with owner of restaurant he likes to eat at"

it isn't weird to be friends with people of a completely normal profession.

Implying that child-trafficking "pizzeria" owner is a normal profession.

I mean theres nothing wrong with it but it isnt that common.

"Former president friends with (((pizzeria))) owners" just seemed too similar to something they'd make up.

Every time I see a post from that subreddit I play "suspicious minds bingo."

One_SolutionWe are winning BIG. - Q 68 points 6 hours ago To the untrained eye it simply appears that they are saying that people from all walks of life loved BB.

But, in reality, they are mocking peoole, putting a pizza-gate reference in their faces.

And from the book:

This was playfully illustrated by historian Rob MacDougall. MacDougall came up with a game he called “The Paranoid Style” (named in honor of Richard Hofstadter’s famous essay, which we talked about a few chapters ago). You can play at home. First, get a few friends together, and have everyone pick one well-known historical figure—it can be anyone they like. The object of the game is to find evidence that the figure was secretly part of a “conspiracy of vampires that has pulled the strings behind the world for hundreds of years.” There is, as far as I know, no such conspiracy; MacDougall just made it up. But that doesn’t stop people from finding evidence anyway. The first time he played with some historian colleagues, he says they quickly spun a yarn in which Henry Ford instigated the Industrial Revolution in the hope that factory smoke would blot out the sun, and Thomas Edison invented the light bulb to get humans used to living in the dark. (MacDougall notes that people got hung up on the “rules” of vampirism, like avoiding sunlight. These days he plays the game with extraterrestrial conspirators instead of vampires, since “we have fewer preconceptions about what aliens are like and what the alien conspiracy wants to achieve.”)

MacDougall calls finding evidence of a nonexistent conspiracy in the real historical record “historical apophenia”; “People are creative, and good at finding patterns, and history is full of information that can be made to seem significant.” The illusion of conspiracy can be eerily convincing. “That ‘click’ when disparate facts seem to fit together is a powerful and even uncanny feeling,” he says. “The evidence starts to line up all too well with the fantasy you have just concocted, and you skate right up to the edge of believing.”

The best conspiracy theorists are playing “The Paranoid Style” without realizing it. Remember David Icke, who we met a few chapters ago? The conspirators leave subtle symbols of their plot lying around, Icke says, and “when you know what you’re looking for, it starts jumping out at you.” Of course, for Icke this isn’t evidence of an involuntary cognitive bias, it’s evidence that the conspiracy is real. Here are just a few of the things Icke looks for as evidence of the conspiracy: people covering one eye (he has a collection of photos of popular musicians covering one eye), the number thirteen, pyramids (especially pyramids with thirteen levels, like the one on every American one-dollar bill), triangles (he has more photos of celebrities gesticulating in a triangular manner), circles, crescents, squares, cubes, hexagons, the number six, six-pointed stars, crosses, pillars, columns, crowns, horns, fire, sticking one’s tongue out (cue more celebrity snapshots), the letters E and L, the planet Saturn, spiders, goats, and bearded men (including, but not limited to, Santa Claus). For David Icke, it’s practically impossible to walk down the street without seeing evidence of a conspiracy.

/r/justneckbeardthings is that way friendo

MFW you're disrespecting an /r/drama treasure!

You forgot to ping them. u/One_SolutionWe

Russian bots are the same as disgusting smallmind christfaggots, TIL

Did you write this for somewhere else and just copy it, cos man this is one hell of a serious post.

pizzashill takes everything very seriously

Look you obviously have no idea who you are talking about /u/pizzashill serious posts are 100% home grown organic made by the finest seriousposters around.

Oh pizza you and your effort posting ways

What book is that?

https://www.amazon.com/Suspicious-Minds-Believe-Conspiracy-Theories/dp/1472915631

Thank you.

Lmao I told y'all

Barbara Bush's death has confirmed 🐎👞 again

At least they remembered to blame the Jesuits. The truly classic conspiracy theories are the best.

Obama had $60k worth of hot dogs flown into the after party.

Shoo shoo Donnie boi

Bruh, you live in Alabama.

Kneel before your Californian better.

Love to create Where's Waldo's out of my global criminal conspiracies.

their symbolism will be their downfall

According to these guys the Jews Deep State have been running things for centuries, leaving pyramids and eyes and pizzas all over the place and no-one has stopped them.

But now a bunch of pensioners have discovered the internet... their time has come.

Wtf is alliteration!!??!?!