This whole situation really hurts my guns' feelings for this exact reason. Everyone just assumes that they don't deserve a say in the matter. It pisses them off that so many on both sides of the debate just assume the right to make decisions on their lives. I finally sat down with my guns and asked them how THEY felt and what THEY wanted for their future. I told them that I would fully support any decision they made and my oldest broke down crying. I assured her that it was okay as I wiped the tear of oil dripping from the charging handle and told her how much I loved her. She said that she loves being my gun, she just also wants to be able to get out more. I hung my head thinking that this was for sure when she was going to leave me... but then she smiled at me with that beautiful grin of hers and ever so gently set her trigger guard on my hand. "Hey," she said, "don't be sad, we can get through this!" "But how?!" I exclaimed. "You know how much I want to shoot each of you but I can't afford to take each of you out every week! So yeah, at times I have to take the cheaper calibers out more but what choice do I have?" She knowingly nods with a smile as the others scoot in closer. "That's why we all love you so much, you take each of us out as often as possible and not only shoot us but you actually clean us when we get home! How many guns can actually say that about their owners?!" I nod because I know she's right. So many people put their guns away dirty. Its horrifying. "So that's why we've been talking in the safe." I look at her with inquisitive eyes. "We have decided that, in an effort to share the love with all of us, we want you to take half of us out each week to shoot. And (all while rolling her eyes) every other week during the winter (she knows how much I hate the cold)." "Wow," I finally managed to say with a tear falling down my cheek (I love how willing they are to make sure I get to spend time with each of them), "I LOVE that idea but I just can't afford the ammo for all of you..." "We know! But that's where the next part comes in. We want you to quit your job and practice 3 gunning so that you can get.... SPONSORS!! Sponsors will buy you ammo to use and make them look good so that other people will buy their product!" My eyes widened in excitement, "I can't believe I never thought of that! I mean I always think of that but now I can tell my wife it was your idea and now it won't sound so crazy... But YES!!!" We all dog piled each other in excitement and rolled around on the floor (unloaded of course) for hours laughing hysterically. We finally calmed down and we are now waiting on my wife to get home to give her the good news! Wish me luck!
Yeah silly incel leafs and yuros can't even mow down pedestrians in sports cars. Americans kill people in their own personal vehicles like true lovers of freedom and capitalism.
16 comments
1 SnapshillBot 2018-04-25
You probably don't get bussy because you're the type of guy who fucking nails his dick to a board
Snapshots:
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1 Honk4Tits 2018-04-25
Tbf is was an American branded van
1 Coats_Unbuttoned 2018-04-25
Confirmed for international conspiracy to prevent incels from obtaining a gf.
1 Chicup 2018-04-25
Like it could be a Canadian one?
1 Foxehh3 2018-04-25
Which Canadian-brand vans even exist?
1 37x_oak_allergy 2018-04-25
This whole situation really hurts my guns' feelings for this exact reason. Everyone just assumes that they don't deserve a say in the matter. It pisses them off that so many on both sides of the debate just assume the right to make decisions on their lives. I finally sat down with my guns and asked them how THEY felt and what THEY wanted for their future. I told them that I would fully support any decision they made and my oldest broke down crying. I assured her that it was okay as I wiped the tear of oil dripping from the charging handle and told her how much I loved her. She said that she loves being my gun, she just also wants to be able to get out more. I hung my head thinking that this was for sure when she was going to leave me... but then she smiled at me with that beautiful grin of hers and ever so gently set her trigger guard on my hand. "Hey," she said, "don't be sad, we can get through this!" "But how?!" I exclaimed. "You know how much I want to shoot each of you but I can't afford to take each of you out every week! So yeah, at times I have to take the cheaper calibers out more but what choice do I have?" She knowingly nods with a smile as the others scoot in closer. "That's why we all love you so much, you take each of us out as often as possible and not only shoot us but you actually clean us when we get home! How many guns can actually say that about their owners?!" I nod because I know she's right. So many people put their guns away dirty. Its horrifying. "So that's why we've been talking in the safe." I look at her with inquisitive eyes. "We have decided that, in an effort to share the love with all of us, we want you to take half of us out each week to shoot. And (all while rolling her eyes) every other week during the winter (she knows how much I hate the cold)." "Wow," I finally managed to say with a tear falling down my cheek (I love how willing they are to make sure I get to spend time with each of them), "I LOVE that idea but I just can't afford the ammo for all of you..." "We know! But that's where the next part comes in. We want you to quit your job and practice 3 gunning so that you can get.... SPONSORS!! Sponsors will buy you ammo to use and make them look good so that other people will buy their product!" My eyes widened in excitement, "I can't believe I never thought of that! I mean I always think of that but now I can tell my wife it was your idea and now it won't sound so crazy... But YES!!!" We all dog piled each other in excitement and rolled around on the floor (unloaded of course) for hours laughing hysterically. We finally calmed down and we are now waiting on my wife to get home to give her the good news! Wish me luck!
1 Coats_Unbuttoned 2018-04-25
What the fuck did I just read
1 37x_oak_allergy 2018-04-25
GOOD point.
1 AlveolarPressure 2018-04-25
Here in America we prefer our Dodge Challengers of peace
1 itoucheditforacookie 2018-04-25
1 AlveolarPressure 2018-04-25
Yeah silly incel leafs and yuros can't even mow down pedestrians in sports cars. Americans kill people in their own personal vehicles like true lovers of freedom and capitalism.
1 itoucheditforacookie 2018-04-25
The more successful one
1 AlveolarPressure 2018-04-25
Yeah but he was an Islamic terrorist. I'm talking about PATRIOTS here.
1 EarnestNoMeta 2018-04-25
that guy is a fucking retard.
1 jaredschaffer27 2018-04-25
There should be a Godwin's law for America.
Gunwin's law:
As a thread devoted to a non-American problem continues, the probability that an American problem will be brought up approaches one.
1 buttcoinbuttcoin 2018-04-25
Why do people want police officers that won't shoot a mass murderer pointing a gun at them 🤔