Ed rolls his 450 lb frame out of bed every morning, sips a big boy glass of warm soy milk and starts his daily stream of agendaposting. He fills his posts and comments with smug catchphrases and colorful emojis, but these are just a mask...a smokescreen hiding the fact that Ed is possibly the most triggered autist on this entire subreddit. The possibility that Drumpfy Blumpf might have actually done something significant terrifies him.
You hear this a lot: "A thread died for this." While accurate, this phrase generally carries no weight. But just this once, if you would do me a favor and hear me out, it would do all of us a lot of good.
A. Thread. Died. For this. You woke up this morning, poured yourself a bowl of Faggot Flakes, moistened them with your impotent Faggot prostate milk (which IS in fact impotent, because you're a fucking faggot) and, within seconds, decided that today of all days would be the time you decide to cut your synapse firing quota by just a little too much.
So you hopped online, carved out this uninspired chicken scratch, probably failed the captcha once for every strand of peach fuzz on your half-empty sack, and clicked Submit.
At that moment, a thread died. A thread that could have been bumped. A thread that could have been resurrected with content, or valuable discourse between its denizens. Hell, it could've even been bumped for absolutely no reason. And that would've been okay. Because, had it survived, a few more seconds could have been spent without having had your abortion of a post been born in this world.
I realize you have been buttering your own toast for a long while here mate. You and your little clique of ball lickers making fun of every dotard that comes along.
That’s all good and dandy with me ed . But when I see your libtard kind getting all frothy with cum bubbles from blowing each other. That’s when I try to take the stinkiest shit possible and smear it all over the whole god damn circlejerk.
11 comments
1 SnapshillBot 2018-04-30
This is why we need mayocide.
Snapshots:
I am a bot. (Info / Contact)
1 rationalhuckleberry 2018-04-30
Good morning to you to /u/standard12!
1 Standard12 2018-04-30
Haha its afternoon here but I was expecting that comment. Very speedy response time though.
1 Coats_Unbuttoned 2018-04-30
He doesn’t sleep. He claims “muh night shift” but I suspect he just posts on Reddit until he passes out for four hours, then goes back to it.
1 rationalhuckleberry 2018-04-30
The Soros checks stop if he doesn’t hustle that bussy.
1 Coats_Unbuttoned 2018-04-30
not getting direct wires from the Rothschild Foundation
The absolute state of shilling in 2018
1 IFuckedZoeQuinn 2018-04-30
Ed rolls his 450 lb frame out of bed every morning, sips a big boy glass of warm soy milk and starts his daily stream of agendaposting. He fills his posts and comments with smug catchphrases and colorful emojis, but these are just a mask...a smokescreen hiding the fact that Ed is possibly the most triggered autist on this entire subreddit. The possibility that Drumpfy Blumpf might have actually done something significant terrifies him.
1 Ed_ButteredToast 2018-04-30
You hear this a lot: "A thread died for this." While accurate, this phrase generally carries no weight. But just this once, if you would do me a favor and hear me out, it would do all of us a lot of good.
A. Thread. Died. For this. You woke up this morning, poured yourself a bowl of Faggot Flakes, moistened them with your impotent Faggot prostate milk (which IS in fact impotent, because you're a fucking faggot) and, within seconds, decided that today of all days would be the time you decide to cut your synapse firing quota by just a little too much.
So you hopped online, carved out this uninspired chicken scratch, probably failed the captcha once for every strand of peach fuzz on your half-empty sack, and clicked Submit.
At that moment, a thread died. A thread that could have been bumped. A thread that could have been resurrected with content, or valuable discourse between its denizens. Hell, it could've even been bumped for absolutely no reason. And that would've been okay. Because, had it survived, a few more seconds could have been spent without having had your abortion of a post been born in this world.
1 IFuckedZoeQuinn 2018-04-30
This is a bully-free subreddit. Please take your hateful words elsewhere or I will be forced to report you to the moderators.
1 Ed_ButteredToast 2018-04-30
I realize you have been buttering your own toast for a long while here mate. You and your little clique of ball lickers making fun of every dotard that comes along.
That’s all good and dandy with me ed . But when I see your libtard kind getting all frothy with cum bubbles from blowing each other. That’s when I try to take the stinkiest shit possible and smear it all over the whole god damn circlejerk.
1 Ed_ButteredToast 2018-04-30
😴😴😴