The horrifying truth about Gwyneth Paltrow the liberal media refuses to tell you

64  2018-08-13 by random_bullshit_blah

A lot of people don't realize this but Gwyneth Paltrow has suffered from Two-Face-ism for about 6 years now due to a bad batch of organic facial cleansing yogurt that she was advertising on goop.com. Melted half her face right off and now it's just a skull held together by motorized wires. So now when she does films, they just fix it in post by doubling the good half of her face. You can tell because both halves of her face look the same

https://www.reddit.com/r/therewasanattempt/comments/96ru11/to_create_a_period_piece_set_in_1988_the_front/e435k0d/ .

15 comments

1  SnapshillBot 2018-08-13

I don't give a fuck how much you call your flimsy delusions "enlightenment." There is no amount of ceaseless self-deception that will make you accept the charred hellscape of being a miserable useless destitute fucking junkie piece of shit. You know what you are, and it is deeply ugly on every level.

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1  pizzashill 2018-08-13

Well well well.

1  Furious_Anteater 2018-08-13

She also has jade eggs shoved up her steamed vagina.

1  TransexualWiener 2018-08-13

steamed hams?

1  MG87 2018-08-13

More like tuna that's been left in the sun

1  snallygaster 2018-08-13

I don't think many people would shed a tear for her if this had happened. Who even likes her?

1  AntiLuke 2018-08-13

People with only a passing familiarity with her.

1  i_wish_i_was_dead___ 2018-08-13

me

1  Tessmcpill 2018-08-13

Word on the street is Gwyneth Paltrow loves open relationships and sex parties. It's one of the main reasons Coldplay and her split up. I've also heard she got genital herpes from a sex party. She's so particular about the food and drink she consumes, yet she lets strangers raw dog her. But we all knew she was kind of a nut case.

1  1alian 2018-08-13

Eating avacado\=protection from STDS

1  RichEvansSextape 2018-08-13

Don't question white woman logic

1  cimarafa 2018-08-13

CDAN calls her a whore/hooker every other week, but trusting CDAN is retarded.

1  itsCaffeine 2018-08-13

It’s one of the main reasons Coldplay and her split up.

You mean Chris Martin right? I don’t think she was dating the whole band lmao

1  pantsunami 2018-08-13

did you not read, it said she loves open relationships

1  itsCaffeine 2018-08-13

🤔🤔🤔

1  ROBFIA 2018-08-13

She used to be with Fight Club

1  EternallyMiffed 2018-08-13

Oh is that all? At least she's not burning coal.