DDF attempts #MeToo

1  2018-10-30 by cheeZetoastee

110 comments

Yawn, another brigade from Drama? They must be tired of disrespecting the trans community or creeping on underage children if they're willing to shit on a wholesome subreddit that actually does something to help others.

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I'm not even sure what your point is. Yeah I'd rather sleep with a dakimakura of my waifu Renge-chan than with some random 3D slut but that doesn't mean I'm desperate, it's the opposite, it implies that I have standards.

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Mueller's spokesman actually said something besides "No comment"!

This shit is so fucking funny. It's like the Gang from IASIP trying to be Karl Rove with predictable results.

I remember arguing during the Kavanaugh/Moore scandals that faking this stuff is hard. Going around and asking random women to make up accusations is pants on head idiotic because it just takes just one woman coming forward and saying how you offered her money to lie to undermine your whole campaign. These galaxy brains didn’t think this through at all.

daddy boys

thinking

Lol

because it just takes just one woman coming forward and saying how you offered her money to lie to undermine your whole campaign

not really true unless you're a retard who creates or allows the creation of evidence/records of the transaction. the thing is, rape accusations are true unless proven false while conspiracy accusations are false unless proven true

It would help to get a rape victim who actually worked at the law office where Mueller supposedly misconducted her.

because it just takes just one woman coming forward and saying how you offered her money to lie to undermine your whole campaign.

That's why people commit clintoncide

um thats because the GOP is the party of HONESTY and INTEGRITY and they would never know how to enact such nefarious schemes 🙄🙄🙄

ZOMG THIS! 🤗

Never trust gussy. Gussy always lies and is often paid to do so.

Not true. Should be about the same as men

But some have problems admitting even this is possible by gussy, so they think any accusing of lying is saying that gussy always lies

Do not fall for it. There is an honest gussy out there

There is an honest gussy out there

I should ban you for such heresy!

heresy!

I am like Martin Luther King when he pounded the gussy in back of a bus for freedom

Heh. He was a real POS adulterer, wasn't he?

He had dreams

Some civil rights, some of pounding multiple gussy

But only some came true. RIP.

Sometimes, no amount of gussy will satisfy great men

It was a noble effort tho

Let's all nail some tail in honor of Dr. King.

Way ahead of you

Few hours from now, I will honor memory of the great man

Godspeed, brother.

You’re doing god’s work. Bless you.

I'll ban you first you damn incel

No u!

Let's see, here we have a man, Wohl, lying and acting retarded. How can we turn this into a jerk about how conniving gussies are?

Evidence is meaningless. Wait, aren't you one of those lying evil foids?

I thought as much.

I neither believe nor disbelieve just given an accusation.

The two moids involved in this caper look pretty stupid.

Wait, aren't you one of those lying evil foids?

😤

Silence, woman. No one asked you.

Everything you think you know about women is a lie.

More to the point. Women, strictly speaking, do not exist.

What do I mean by this?

Consider the following.

If you will.

What's the first thing you think of when you think of women? You know, besides their obnoxious, bitchy, hen pecking personalities. Chances are it's either the tits or the pussy, right?

Let's just focus on the tits for now. That's probably the easiest way in. There's easy way to explain this or how I know it, but trust me I have my sources (I have QAnon level security clearence). Breasts are not what you think they are.

You think of tits. You think "mammaries" and "milk" right? You've probably even seen some tits shoot milk out on the internet or in real life, so it's never even crossed your mind to question it. But appearances are deceiving.

Every time. Especially in this case.

What I'm getting at is that those things you think are boobs, aren't actually boobs at all--they're just giant balls that girls have on their chests. That's right.

All women have giant oversized testicles on their chests.

Let that sink in.

but anon what the fuck does that have to do with anything

It has everything to do with everything. Think about this. What is the ratio of your ball size to your dick size? Now increase the size of the balls to the size of an average set of what you THINK are a roasties "mammaries" and think about what that does to the size of the dick that needs to go along with those balls...

Is it all coming together yet?

WOMEN

ARE

GIANT

INVERTED

PENISES

Some of you normies might be thinking about shilling in this thread and saying something like

but anon, there's no way that's true I had sex with a girl and she had a bussy and it was rockin dood xD WRONG

Girls don't exist. You had sex with a giant upside down penis. You literally put your dick inside of a giant dick. It would have been even less gay to fuck a full blown dude in the ass, let alone a trap--but that's completely beside the point.

You might be thinking to yourself at this point

how could you possibly tell if girls are giant inverted penises instead of just girls if the look exactly like girls and never do anything a giant penis would do? EXACTLY

This is what we in the agencies call a "double-blind perfect disguise." It's supposed to be theoretically impossible to construct one artificially, but the basic premise is that it's a disguise that is so good that there is literally no way to tell the difference between the disguise and the thing wearing it. No way that is...until IT DECIDES TO TAKE THE DISGUISE OFF

Let that sink in for a moment...

Are you paying attention yet?

Anyways, here's how we know that women are actually just giant inverted penises.

Several years ago a certain strain of parasite was identified by Soviet Scientists who weren't allowed to marry or have sex at all for state security reasons. The parasite was only able to be extracted from live samples of married men in the pineal gland during secret Soviet vivisection experiments that had to remain concealed for obvious ethical reasons.

As a result of this research it was eventually uncovered that, on the night of the honeymoon, women lure the man into bed alone and then spray a prodigious amount of semen containing the parasite all over the man.

After that it's unclear what happens, but it appears that the parasite takes over complete control of the thoughts and memories of the man. Alterations in the electromagnetic resonances of the man's brainscans also seem to correspond to this. The man then becomes basically a dummy that can be controlled at the complete leisure of the woman. This is every man who has ever gotten married loses their soul--they LITERALLY lose it

still unemployed then?

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This is amazing. Don't ever delete this

One upvote for you

It's just some 🍝 I found.

Very good stuff. Level of humor is like the finest from Two X chromosomes or even Troll X

Level of humor is like the finest from Two X chromosomes or even Troll X

That hilarious!!? 😊🤩 No, please, you are being much too kind, you are making me blush 🤭🤭🤭🤭

That hilarious!!?

Yes, it holds up well to highest Two X comedy standards that they set

But I only have one upvote, so you must put more comedy like this here in the future

highest Two X comedy standards

Yeah, dude, you've already told me how the dizzy broads at TwoX crack you up. Roasties, amirite. 🤣🤣🤣

I've got a million of them and I'll be back tomorrow night. Don't forget to upvote, like and subscribe.

Good for you! Its said that women can't be funny, but it looks like you have found some great pasta that proves the naysayers wrong

At first glance, you'd think she was sperging out, but the humor is subtle

dizzy broads

Roasties, amirite.

Making fun of some woman's flappy vagina is not acceptable when talking with me.

Every woman is a sexy intelligent, strong and brave goddess, who is doing emotional labor that men can't even comprehend with their limited minds and crude thoughts

Say 10 yasss qweeens and repent your sins, xer (that is because I'm not assuming your gender)

Hey Michael, it's Derek, from the INCEL Support group you frequent. Noticed we haven't seen you for the past few meetings, what gives? You haven't gone and lost that V-card on us have you? JK of course you haven't haha look at you. Anyway I'll see you at the next one, it's your turn to bring snacks! That Soylent stuff you like is okay this time but make sure it's not warm again! Cya later bud!

Ehhhh, maybe a 4/10. I know you can find better pasta than this

But thanks for trying. It is appreciated

4/10

🤩🤩🏆🤩🤩

👏👏👏

Lies. They do it because it's fun for them. Only true cucks pay for something they do naturally.

Keep up.

The FBI knew of the hoax last week and now the DDF retards are trying to push the story today after it came out that Mueller told the FBI already. That little fuckface Wohl tried to #metoo Mueller with a GOP lobbyist paying women off. He must really want senpai's attention if he's willing to rack up more charges before he's sentenced for being a thief. He's still not getting a pardon.

LMAO Wohl is rage/nervous tweeting now, but he keeps deleting tweets once he realizes they are incriminating. But then he still keeps tweeting!

Who's Whol?

He’s the “judge walked into a leftist hipster coffee shop” guy

Dedicated idiot on twitter

A trumpet who is already in trouble for some securities fraud by 20 with his dad as his lawyer and obsessively praises trunp on twitter and who’s been gunning to try to get a pardon from him.

Charlie Kirk but with half the brain cells.

A company called “Surefire Intelligence” has ties to this Mueller smear.

Jacob Wohl denied having ties to Surefire. Surefire’s official phone number redirects to a voicemail box registered to Jacob’s mom.

[…]

Jacob gave us comment at first, but went quiet when we told him Surefire Intelligence’s phone number redirected to a voicemail account registered to his mom.

When you try to commit conspiracy against the FBI on mommy's cell phone plan 😂😂😂

Well that's surefire proof he lacks intelligence.

Best part is the number going to his mom's voice mail.

Either the right bought into its own propaganda that it's super easy to frame people for sexual assault or it actually is super easy and they are just this retarded and incompetent.

Tough call tbh.

Both!

I'm gonna go with the first one since it is retarded to think that someone won't squeal if you start offering people money for false testimony

Literally why wouldn't you? You get to play hero and probably keep the money too.

You'd have to be a fool to not haggle though. If you threatened to share the correspondence then you could probably get a bit more, then turn them in.

hang on do you think that ford woman was telling the truth

Yes but I also don't think a drunken groping should've disqualified Kav.

Agree his meltdown on the stand should have.

There are many reasons why he should not have been put on the court, from his poor ethics to his terrible demeanor while testifying. But drunkenly groping a girl during his crazy party days really isn't a reason to get disqualified. It isn't a moral thing to due, but something that happened 30+ years ago that wasn't a serious crime like murder or rape is water under the bridge. As usual, though, the Dems picked the idpol avenue of attack and failed miserably.

The guy in the front looks like Terry. RIP 😢

F. His resting in heaven as the divine holyC and templeos creator

Lmao Wohl is such a brainlet it's impressive

For someone who probably thinks only black and hispanic people commit crimes, Jacob "securities fraud" Wohl sure seems to have engaged in a lot of criminal activity in his 14 or whatever years on this earth.

Wohl is what happens when you're rich as fuck and give your son too much freedom with his trust fund money and an inflated sense of self-importance

Affluenza's real after all.

Wait, that one kid was behind this? loooooool, here's hoping he gets sent somewhere harder than Camp Cupcake for this.

Camp Cupcake

lmao

Yup, him and his fake intelligence (lol) company Surefire Intelligence. He, uh, very cleverly added some filters to pictures of celebrities and created faked linked in profiles with them to show that his company was very much real, and founded by a man who appears to be Jacob Wohl with the contrast and brightness turned way up, but is definitely not Jacob Wohl. Like a good intelligence operative he also registered the domain to Surefire Intelligence's website using his own email. Oh and the company's phone number goes to his mom. No one would be able to connect the dots!

But don't worry! Now that he knows the FBI is investigating he is just deleting the evidence! He's got the FBI right where he wants them...

How can somebody be this fucking incompetent? The kid probably got the best education money can buy, gets involved with schemes that require some level of domain knowledge, and still makes these hilariously dumb blunders.

He's still the age where he thinks he's invincible. That combined with daddy's money always produces hilarious results.

All the education in the word can't make you smart. Just look at brainlets like Shapiro and Carson.

He has no intelligence training whatsoever. He just started a company and pretended it's an intelligence agency the same way Lucy pretends to be a psychiatrist and charges Charlie Brown a nickel for therapy.

YOU'RE a cupcake.

20 year old fraud and a dude who was shot and run over by his own PI vs the FBI. Those FBI boys are in over their heads. This timeline is less believable than most porn.

I have shared this before but no action was taken. This feels like a safespace to share again #metoo


I am writing with information relevant in evaluating the current nominee to r/Drama Moderators. As a dramanaut, I expect that you will maintain this as confidential until we have further opportunity to speak.

Ed ButteredToast physically and sexually assaulted me during high school in the early 1980's. He conducted these acts with the assistance of his close friend, Darq Wolff.

Both were 1-2 years older than me and students at a local private school. The assault occurred in a suburban Maryland area home at a gathering that included me and 4 others.

Ed physically pushed me into a bedroom as I was headed for a bathroom up a short stairwell from the living room. They locked the door and played loud music, precluding any successful attempts to yell for help.

Ed was on top of me while laughing with Wolff, who periodically jumped onto ButteredToast. They both laughed as Ed tried to disrobe my bussy in their highly inebriated state.

With ButteredToast's hand over my mouth, I feared he may inadvertently kill me.

From across the room, a very drunken Wolff said mixed words to Ed ranging from "dude" to "bussy lmao."

At one point when Wolff jumped onto the bed, the weight on my bussy was substantial. The pile toppled, and the two scrapped with each other.

After a few attempts to get away, I was able to take this opportune moment to get up and run across to a hallway bathroom. I locked the bathroom door behind me.

Both loudly stumbled down the stairwell, at which point other persons at the house were talking with them. I exited the bathroom, ran outside of the house and went home.

I have not knowingly seen /u/ed_butteredtoast on r/Drama since the assault. I did see Wolff once at the Potomac Village Safeway, where he was extremely uncomfortable seeing me and clearly a pedophile.

My bussy received medical treatment regarding the assault. On July 6, I notified my local Reddit admin representative to ask them how to proceed with sharing this information. It is upsetting to discuss sexual assault and its repercussions, yet I felt guilty and compelled as a netizen about the idea of not saying anything.

OUT

OUT

OUT

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👏ALWAYS👏BELIEVE👏THE👏ACCUSER👏

dont hide behind ur Ed enabling bot u/LightUmbra 😠😠😠

no u

Im on #TeamUmbra

Same tbh

Wohl added a filter to a picture of his and pretended to be "Matthew Cohen" a managing partner at this firm on LinkedIn. This is absolutely hilarious.

https://twitter.com/JaneMayerNYer/status/1057371849439502338

And to top it all off, he made fake LinkedIn profiles for employees of the firm using photos of models and actors. When reading this guy's twitter posts I always thought to myself that it had to be a troll and he couldn't actually be this stupid, but it seems that he really is this stupid.

https://twitter.com/AricToler/status/1057364163729784832

He's apparently now deleting them too, which... is not a great idea.

https://twitter.com/Popehat/status/1057391873952608256

This shit just keeps getting better.

Lmao, and Wohl is so young so we have potentially decades of his comic relief.

Imagine being as stupid as David Wohl.

Jack Burkman and Jacob Wohl, fucking lol. When you want Tom Hagen but Fredo shows up.

The Presidency, The Supreme Court, A Special Counselship

Tell me one reason why sexual assault won't help my career

The saying "reality has a liberal bias" wasn't supposed to be this literal.

Wohlcels on suicide watch

FALSE-FLAG ALERT

The Trump supporters always accuse the left of the craziest shit, it's always funny when they decide to go and try this themselves and immediately fall flat on their face and prove its difficult to get away with what they accuse the left of.

they accuse the left of the shit they actually do - it's all projection lol they tried to plant a fake sex story about Roy Moore with a fake woman as well to discredit the real ones .The fact that this number goes back to Wohl's mom is the funniest shit i've heard in a while.

yeah its always funny how the accusers disappear into obscurity with large sums of money. but all the accusations are real. believe all democratic accusers!

​

Well Dr. Blasey-Ford certainly was more credible than these drummed up republican false flags... But you enjoy that strawman

I'm not defending any false accusations even ones done by Repblicans. But this believe all wamen stuff is garbage. How is Blasey Ford credible?

What do you mean? She told her therapist about this kavanaugh stuff in 2012 and that was documented. She's a well off professional woman that wouldn't really have the motive to just make this up she literally said to her therapist 6 years ago "I had a sexual assault to me happen in the past and it involves someone that could possible sit on the supreme court some day" and if you watched the questioning, which I did, I have no reason not to believe her.. She received countless death threats and had to move out of her home, predictably, after coming out with this info

Please read this from WaPo: https://wapo.st/2QAADV4?tid=ss_tw&utm_term=.dc595b67bd47

Ford said she told no one of the incident in any detail until 2012, when she was in couples therapy with her husband. The therapist’s notes, portions of which were provided by Ford and reviewed by The Washington Post, *do not mention Kavanaugh’s name** but say she reported that she was attacked by students “from an elitist boys’ school” who went on to become “highly respected and high-ranking members of society in Washington.” The notes say four boys were involved, a discrepancy Ford says was an error on the therapist’s part. Ford said there were four boys at the party but only two in the room.*

I believe something might have have happened here but you can't deny there could be a political motivation given the timing. They completely white washed her from the internet. All her social media posts. Everything gone.

because MAGAcels kept doxxing her and sending death threats....

Vocal fry intensifies

I read this in Ford’s voice.

The Trump supporters always accuse the left of the craziest shit

lol nigga weve just had years of random rape accusations and a guy throwing ice or some shit

Of course they think everything is a false flag because that's what they'd do.

lol you guys cheering on krassensteins now are you