The latest wandshit movie [spoilers]
1 2018-11-22 by bareballzthebitch
Dumbledore (Jude Nelson) and Grindelwald (Johnny Depp) are gay together or were when they were twinks.
Newt Scamander (outed as a sperg in the last movie) tames the wild giant Dragon-puss.
Lita LeStrange ( I think this is Lenny Kravitz's daughter) is a good girl, wants to cuck her fiance Newt's brother) with Newt, then she dies at the end.
The gold-seeking platypus ends up being the real hero at the end.
The guy (who also plays the Flash) is not actually a Lestrange but is instead Dumbledore's nephew (I infer, the movie was kinda vague on this) who was switched with another baby (they all look the same, really) by his sister (Lita) and then the boat sank.
13 comments
1 SmurfPrivilege 2018-11-22
Also, as serious violation of consent is committed against a male muggle by a female wizard and it's played off for "humor".
1 aX10mAt1CaL1Y 2018-11-22
That is pretty humorous
1 RyuunDragon 2018-11-22
Everyone knows in the modern world that if a disgusting femoid sexually assaults a tight-bussyhaver, it's "humor", but if bussyboy's hand ever brushes a gussygirl's hand, it's "rape"
1 GigoloJuggalo 2018-11-22
Yeah I thought that was fucked up but then the female wizard joined up with grindelwald so maybe it was meant to show that she was a crazy bitch?
1 OniTan 2018-11-22
The real synopsis is some shitty character no one cares about does pointless shit so a stuck up English lady can make some extra pounds.
1 Gil-Gandel 2018-11-22
Hey, don't blame us English for this one. Rowling is Scottish.
1 2odastream 2018-11-22
No she isn't we don't want her.
1 Gil-Gandel 2018-11-22
Tough. We have our own washouts to contend with and we can't adopt yours.
1 serialflamingo 2018-11-22
No she isn't
1 Gil-Gandel 2018-11-22
Eh, you're right. I knew she wrote Philosopher's Stone in a cafe in Edinburgh, but I didn't know she'd moved there from England.
1 transoceanicdeath 2018-11-22
I tried watching the first one and had to turn it off.
1 Ononox 2018-11-22
What a trainwreck that movie was. It was even messier than my bedroom, and that's saying A LOT.
Seriously though, the baby exchange thing was kinda unclear and Gay Depp hinting that autist Chad flash was Dumbledore's nephew is so sketchy. If they don't play it extremely well on the next movie it will be the official act of burying the Fantastic Creatures saga.
1 ironicshitpostr 2018-11-22
Avada Kedrava yourself