The Underground Drama of "Weird Catholic Twitter"
1 2018-11-26 by HungerArtistatlunch
Unbeknownst to the internet at large is a group of people on twitter, all claiming to faithful sons and daughters of Jesus Christ's One True Church, The Roman Catholic Church.
Now, how is it that faithful Catholics striving together towards virtue have drama between themselves? One word: politics.
"Political drama! What's so special about this?" you may ask. Let me assure you, Catholics go all out in everything they do, especially autism.
First, let's draw battle lines.
#LeftCath: This special group of people believe that some sort of form of socialism is necessary under Catholic Social Doctrine. Sadly, they have a tendency to make their twitter profiles private, so most screenshots of their tweets will come from the other sides tweets.
Traddies: These people are far more numerous than their opponents. They hate socialism, most want the restoration of the Hapsburg line as a Catholic monarchy or something along those lines. They take great joy in posting the numerous quotes from numerous popes condemning socialism in all its forms.
Key Players
LeftCath:
Adrian Vermeule is a professor at Harvard Law. He is controversial for his endorsement of integralism, which is a belief that the separation of Church in state is wrong, and that a better form of government would be some kind of socialism with the Catholic Church guiding the state. Why does Harvard keep him around? Because in practice he supports the Democratic party platform and his advocacy for integralism really doesn't extend past shitposting on twitter.
trad queen, an e-thot without the nudes, a trad wife who won't stop nagging (despite her lack of husband), probably actually retarded. Once wrote a poem juxtaposing the Almighty God, Creator of the Universe, and male ejaculate, (this will be relevant later). Hails from Asheville, NC, known hipster Mecca. Therefore I suspect she only whores herself out on the trad circuit because she's searching for authenticity or something. I repeat: IQ probably somewhere near room temperature.
Various others: Mecha, Dadinista, Mustachioed Baby, kevin, and probably other less prominent ones. It seems their only desire is to counter troll the traddies, but they are far outnumbered, and, as it is known, left can't meme.
Traddies
Classical Theist, small time Catholic youtuber currently sitting at around 2700 subscribers. Once had a hot take that interracial marriage was not sinful, just unwise.
boethius, probably the best troll in this whole thing, which is saying something because he is essentially just a frogposter + Catholicism. Has a bad habit of sometimes spelling the N-word with his replies to his own tweets. Has been blocked by most of the LeftCath's.
Various others: inflammate, Tradical, and many many more. They take up the task of posting papal anti-socialist quotes on the daily.
Timeline: because this is all found, I am guessing a little here, the dates may not be correct, but the sequence of events is to my knowledge.
Broiling Conflict: As long as the LeftCath's have existed, the Traddies have called them out for their socialism. Frequently quoting Leo XIII, John XXIII, Benedict XVI, and John Paul II for back up. in all these little conflicts, LeftCath's have only been able to resort to a cop out. They claim the socialism they support is different than what is being condemned. When pressed to explain themselves, they proceed to block you like the brave revolutionaries they are.
This status quo was peaceful, Traddies could claim to have dunked on the lefties, lefties can virtue signal about persecution or something.
The Brunch Debacle: The LeftCath's, being socialists, all seem to live in NYC or New England. Therefore, a bright idea is bandied about. Let's have a brunch get together in the city and discuss socialism!
Bad move.
Brunch in NYC, being probably the most bougie thing a group could do, is laughed at by the traddies. How could these lefties be more stereotypical? What is a more appropriate symbol of leftist arrogance and elitism than a brunch get together to discuss Marx?
The LeftCath's make a major misstep. Instead of going along with the joke, they defend themselves. Leading to some bad takes regarding elitism.
In the end, I think brunch was called off for some unrelated reason.
The Left Strikes Back: Using a tried and true play from American politics, the LeftCath's accuse their opponents of racism. Unlike in American politics, it seems these people are actually racists (See Classical Theist on interracial marriage) or at least larping. Like most rhetorical attacks by lefties, they feel really good about it. The trads have just taken to saying the N-word more often so their tweets get screenshotted and posted by the lefties, proving that they live rent free in their heads.
Classical Mistake: Classical Theist, I suspect because of his youtube channel, wants to be seen as more than a troll, so he bristles at the accusations of racism. But how to respond?
Remember trad queen's poem?
He makes the argument on twitter that "pornographic language" i.e. talking about cum, telling people to fuck off or suck it, or simply being lewd of speech in general, is worse than racism. He brings up the poem as exhibit A of this blasphemy.
Everyone scratches their heads, but the true believers take up the mantle and concur. However, the sides are entrenched now. No one is convinced, and the traddies look to be REEEEEEing over a piece of bad poetry.
Current State: Like the rest of the internet, everything has kind of returned to the original status quo. In truth, this all resulted in a win for the LeftCaths. All these traddies may be dismissed as racists, and blocked for being racist.
TL;DR On Twitter, a niche group of Catholic trolls, hipsters, and one Harvard professor get into it over socialism, racism, pornography, and brunch. No one walks away looking good.
124 comments
1 BussyShillBot 2018-11-26
Because the community got taken over by them.
The gaming community is as close you get to a white supremacists eithout going to a white supremacist rally And kids play games. The future is fucked in ways I don't think people realize, if you think these days are bad, oh boy wait untill the 12 year olds who have grown up around people saying the N word constantly become adults. Yeah...
Basically gaming has legitamatley been a fucking horrible plauge on the world and has been a massive cause of the recent rise of racism.
Outlines:
I am a bot for posting Outline.com links. github / Contact for info or issues
1 quagsir3 2018-11-26
Gamers are rising up epic style and there is nothing you can do about it libtard xd
1 SnapshillBot 2018-11-26
womp womp
Snapshots:
This Post - archive.org, megalodon.jp, removeddit.com, archive.is
Adrian Vermeule - archive.org, megalodon.jp, archive.is
trad queen - archive.org, megalodon.jp, archive.is
Once wrote a poem juxtaposing the A... - archive.org, megalodon.jp, archive.is
Mecha - archive.org, megalodon.jp, archive.is
Dadinista - archive.org, megalodon.jp, archive.is
Mustachioed Baby - archive.org, megalodon.jp, archive.is
kevin - archive.org, megalodon.jp, archive.is
Classical Theist - archive.org, megalodon.jp, archive.is
currently sitting at around 2700 su... - archive.org, megalodon.jp, archive.is
boethius - archive.org, megalodon.jp, archive.is
sometimes spelling the N-word with ... - archive.org, megalodon.jp, archive.is
inflammate - archive.org, megalodon.jp, archive.is
Tradical - archive.org, megalodon.jp, archive.is
What is a more appropriate symbol o... - archive.org, megalodon.jp, archive.is
Leading to some bad takes regarding... - archive.org, megalodon.jp, archive.is
I am a bot. (Info / Contact)
1 Oh_hamburgers_ 2018-11-26
Now that's what I call an effort post, haven't had one of these in months.
1 dudeWares 2018-11-26
I got three sentences in. TLDR
1 AlecOzzyHillPitas 2018-11-26
I loathe you in ways you cannot begin to comprehend.
1 dudeWares 2018-11-26
u mad bro?
1 AlecOzzyHillPitas 2018-11-26
That’s literally what I just told you - yes I’m mad.
1 dudeWares 2018-11-26
fag
1 HungerArtistatlunch 2018-11-26
Literally at the bottom of the post...
1 ComedicSans 2018-11-26
You forget my effortpost about internecine NZ political party warfare. Rude.
1 cimarafa 2018-11-26
That was actually a good post.
1 totalrandomperson 2018-11-26
do you have a link?
1 ComedicSans 2018-11-26
https://www.reddit.com/r/Drama/comments/9poywp/gather_round_children_its_time_for_some_political/
1 Ed_ButteredToast 2018-11-26
https://i.imgur.com/zWEv5Gp.jpg
1 Ed_ButteredToast 2018-11-26
https://i.imgur.com/zWEv5Gp.jpg
1 AlecOzzyHillPitas 2018-11-26
😴😴😴
Just log off dude.
1 XhotwheelsloverX 2018-11-26
Read that shit nigga
1 reallyrunningnow 2018-11-26
Every time you do that, Tay dies a little inside.
1 Red_safe 2018-11-26
why are you like this?
1 LightUmbra 2018-11-26
Would you post this on a snally post?
1 Ed_ButteredToast 2018-11-26
Yes, if needed.
1 LightUmbra 2018-11-26
Rood
1 badukbingepurge 2018-11-26
I think there's a hobby drama you may wish to xpost to. <sniffs> This is fine stuff, very fresh.
1 80BAIT08 2018-11-26
This really is an underappreciated thread. Trad Twitter drama is very entertaining.
1 HungerArtistatlunch 2018-11-26
Honestly, I am thinking about starting a sub just to aggregate it all. None of this even scratches the surface of how deluded some of these people are.
For instance, Classical Theist just tweeted that Galileo deserved worse.
1 friendly_Spycrab 2018-11-26
Holy fuck. These people are retarded.
1 FrostBittenSalsa 2018-11-26
Please do
1 HungerArtistatlunch 2018-11-26
r/TradTwitterTakes
1 snallygaster 2018-11-26
I hope you get this off the ground. This is some good shit.
1 HungerArtistatlunch 2018-11-26
If we can get 100 subscribers, then I will make some kind of announcement on that sub.
1 ComedicSans 2018-11-26
There's no way this isn't trolls trolling trolls. The Catholic Church itself is less defensive than this, Lmao.
1 AntiLuke 2018-11-26
There are some really insecure Catholics out there. It's great when you find those that disagree with the current direction of the church and have trouble reconciling it with their One True Church worldview.
1 dramasexual 2018-11-26
Dude those catholics are the best. The pope is the literal word of god until he says divorced people shouldn't be stoned to death or gays should be allowed to own property or whatever.
1 redfield021767 2018-11-26
If we let gays own property, where does it stop? What's next, toasters owning condos?! Because it's a slippery slope!
1 fisherman213 2018-11-26
With respect, that’s a straight up incorrect understanding what papal authority is. Please at least understand the absolute basics of something before you start flinging empty rhetoric
1 dramasexual 2018-11-26
Why the FUCK would I care about understanding the hierarchy of the most retarded religion this side of radical islam?
1 fisherman213 2018-11-26
Because it’s kind of a good idea to not take pride in your own ignorance, especially in things you don’t like. I’m don’t like Islam either, but I at least want to have a correct understanding of it. But you do you
1 dramasexual 2018-11-26
We don't cotton to those sorts of things round these parts
1 Till9 2018-11-26
I mean, you don't know Catholics like this? They'll quote entire encyclicals from like Pius XII to talk about what the church teaches, and in the same breath rip into something Francis wrote. You're right that it misunderstands papal authority, but it's what the people he's talking about do
1 fisherman213 2018-11-26
Of course, I see your point. But I think the difference is that when Catholics bring up Pius XII or Leo XIII, it’s because what they say and teach is consistent with Popes, theologians, and The teachings of the Church Fathers who came before them. This is the test of everything anyone in The Church says, and it should be weighed in light of the Fathers, popes and magisterial teaching that has come before them.
1 GandalfTheChill 2018-11-26
a HUGE swathe of Catholics are sensitive about Galileo, because NDT types do parrot a moderately skewed version of the story-- but a large section of trads in particular are extremely angry about Galileo. A smaller section of trads reject heliocentrism. I'm not talking trolls, I'm talking people who can barely log onto the internet.
1 ComedicSans 2018-11-26
I suppose I'm struggling to reconcile the ones capable of using Twitter with going full retard like that. If they're social media savvy, they'd surely know the official Catholic position on this shit.
1 GandalfTheChill 2018-11-26
There's a spectrum of RadTrads that will argue everything from "the official Catholic positions is NOT what most priests would say" to "I am more Catholic than the pope" to "All the popes since Vatican II are heretics."
Pop over to r/catholicism and you'll see folks of all kinds.
1 Benedict_XVII 2018-11-26
Geocentrism is just as valid a model as heliocentrism. They have different uses. For example, NASA uses a Geocentric model when mapping stars in the night sky.
1 bunkerman11 2018-11-26
Are these people for real?
1 Red_safe 2018-11-26
this is connoisseur grade /r/drama material. newfags won't appreciate it but this is high quality stuff.
1 FrostBittenSalsa 2018-11-26
Gas the newfags tbh, most of them are just dumb twats and rapefugees
1 KingWayneX 2018-11-26
Its off the spectrum
1 G1Miller 2018-11-26
I am part of Weird Catholic Twitter, this is excellent material.
1 HungerArtistatlunch 2018-11-26
Normie Trads Rise Up!
1 Kerbogha 2018-11-26
Gotta agree
1 Antler_River 2018-11-26
He probably also thinks the Song of Solomon is just a metaphor about the love of Christ for the Church, and not about David contributing to the peaceful mayocide.
1 Karmaisforsuckers 2018-11-26
I tried to become a catholic once but I just wasn't that into raping young boys. Like its ok sometimes, but two or three times a week? Just too much.
1 HungerArtistatlunch 2018-11-26
For anyone interested in following this drama more closely, I have just created r/TradTwitterTakes I will be collecting links to add there shortly. Luckily I have the morning to do this.
1 AlecOzzyHillPitas 2018-11-26
If you keep it updated, maybe see if r/InternetDrama is interested as well.
1 TheFranchize 2018-11-26
How did you stumble so deeply into this twitter-sphere? do you know some of these people irl or have you just come to follow them for the memes?
1 HungerArtistatlunch 2018-11-26
I am actually pretty trad cath myself.
1 TheFranchize 2018-11-26
Ah I see.
I don’t have a Twitter account but it’s a little surreal to see the twitter accounts of folks I know irl posted to Reddit
1 pickyypicnic 2018-11-26
Fuck yes this is very much my shit. I would add GonzoMontreux and ETDEUMPURITAS whose pals with Kevin and tradical irl. troll_lege and utvigilemus are other decent smaller ones. I saw some rant the other day about why it’s good to condemn Marx for materialism as if that makes any sense or leftist economic theory has to be catholic to be good. So goofy.
1 HungerArtistatlunch 2018-11-26
I literally just made r/TradTwitterTakes
If you want to help out, that would be cool.
1 pickyypicnic 2018-11-26
love it I’ll sub and contribute. Have you stumbled upon the really anti Semitic ones or the ones who censor “journalist” for some reason. God they’re such a mess
1 HungerArtistatlunch 2018-11-26
I imagine there's some latent anti semitism going on. I haven't seen it though.
1 cimarafa 2018-11-26
Yeah if you want to know, It’s mostly being buttmad about Jewish converts to Catholicism writing the stuff about not blaming Jews for killing Christ in Vatican II, and then extrapolating that to all of Vatican II being written by Jews which it clearly wasn’t.
1 cimarafa 2018-11-26
Tradcath Twitter is adjacent to actual altright twitter so that’s probably inevitable. Most of them tend to keep some distance though.
1 bunkerman11 2018-11-26
Subbed.
1 TomMyersComedian 2018-11-26
Good post. I love catholic twitter drama. Kevin is a great troll.
You gotta add Woke Space Jesuit, malscrung, and Bruv, the Boogeyman of the Trads, to this
1 HungerArtistatlunch 2018-11-26
I could not find WSJ at his old twitter handle, so maybe he rage quit for a while?
I think the other two have put their accoubts on private, so I didn't add them.
1 TomMyersComedian 2018-11-26
He deactivated temporarily, he’s still @piagnone, I think he has an exam or something?
Bruv is private, not sure about malscrung
1 HungerArtistatlunch 2018-11-26
I found malscrung.
1 CaptainMemer 2018-11-26
Massimo is the best troll honestly.
1 stereoma 2018-11-26
You mean Maximum Beans?
1 Phil_the_credit2 2018-11-26
I knew I spend too much time on twitter when I put too much coffee in my grinder and spontaneously yelled "MASSIMO FAGGIOLI!"
1 annakhachiyanwaifu 2018-11-26
bruv is screenshotting this and laughing at u with WSJ. The eternal priv account
1 TomMyersComedian 2018-11-26
Little does he know I’m on his side
1 SJCards 2018-11-26
Based mod sticky. This is some good shit.
1 reallyrunningnow 2018-11-26
This screams porn star that hates birth control.
1 Whaddaulookinat 2018-11-26
... Ooof
1 Momruepari 2018-11-26
I may be a Papist, but this is too autistic for even me to stomach.
1 ryzyryz 2018-11-26
thank you for this
1 error404brain 2018-11-26
https://twitter.com/ClassicalTheis/status/1067152960063447041
Lmao, (((jesuits))) getting blamed by trads is always hilarious.
1 LightUmbra 2018-11-26
Jesuits are one of the best Catholic groups.
1 error404brain 2018-11-26
Buddy, we are the best christian group.
1 Crusader_1096_2 2018-11-26
Psssh, you call those people "tradcaths"? I bet they don't even want to reconquer the Holy Land, smdh.
1 RevLoki 2018-11-26
Crusades when?
1 Crusader_1096_2 2018-11-26
soon
1 Awayfone 2018-11-26
LedtCath is hard to believe exist eith hiw strong the church was against, socialism, communism and any form of Marxism. they must be retarded
1 HP_civ 2018-11-26
No Sir, this is an actual historical movement. Think about how Jesus always gave to the poor & healed the sick; how the first hospitals were maintained by monks & nuns. They had a decent moment during the industrial revolution. The Texas of Germany, Bavaria, the most hicky hillbilly conservative region, is ruled since its democratic existence by the Christian Socialist Union.
1 BrackRacker 2018-11-26
The more stuff the government does the more socialist it is. /s
1 mammoth-uprising 2018-11-26
Catholics have been better at giving to charity and helping the poor than the dreaded prtestnt menace since the 16th century.
1 ArlenBilldozer 2018-11-26
Wow, my fellow Catholics love blowing shit out of proportion? Imagine that!
1 SpiceAndEvNice 2018-11-26
Gooooood shit op.
Where’s the lie though?
1 ChivalrousHumps 2018-11-26
Fucking love Catholic twitter. A lot of trad caths I’ve met and spoken to seem to be very supportive of socialistic policies like a certain amount of wealth redistribution, which I believe they call Distributionism.
1 HungerArtistatlunch 2018-11-26
Distributism is found in a lot of online Catholic circles.
However, many trads I have met make the point that distributism is an economic philosophy (it doesn't have a very systematized definition) and not a way to organize a government.
Thus the monarchism.
1 ChivalrousHumps 2018-11-26
True. I talk mostly with American Catholics, almost all of whom fall into a Trad Cath definition outside of the Cathjuche meme a few months back. None of them are monarchists in particular, but I do understand why the Europeans who have a history of it would want it.
Full on Marx loving LeftCaths are pretty bewildering to me. It’s like a baby defending a muzzled pitbull and trying to take off the muzzle. You’ll get your redistribution, but pretty much every other value you care (or should care about as a Catholic) will be mulched by your comrades.
1 Empathylouis 2018-11-26
WHY IS THERE NO MENTION OF THE TWEETMAN?
1 jbizzle31995 2018-11-26
VIVA LA SWAG CATH
1 GoodTweetman 2018-11-26
May you all be shot
1 HungerArtistatlunch 2018-11-26
Wanna be a mod on the sub?
1 pattycake1233 2018-11-26
I ❤️ U Tweetman
1 G1Miller 2018-11-26
Wassup tweetman it me
1 jbizzle31995 2018-11-26
LONG LIVE THE TWEETMAN
1 fisherman213 2018-11-26
Tweetman you’re one of my favorite accounts ♥️
1 ThunderWaffles 2018-11-26
lmao
1 andpeggy11 2018-11-26
wow tweetman you made an account just for this bullshit
1 ConstanceOfCompiegne 2018-11-26
GoodRedditman
1 ClassicalTheist 2018-11-26
this is the most reddit thing I’ve ever read
1 pattycake1233 2018-11-26
KING
1 HungerArtistatlunch 2018-11-26
Ngl, some of your yt vids are good. Just cool it with the nigger talk, OK?
1 ClassicalTheist 2018-11-26
interestingly enough the views I take about mixed marriages you can find here by Charles Coulombe, hardly a Catholic known for venting racist sentiment: https://youtu.be/j3TQ6OTrzBc
1 put_HRT_in_the_water 2018-11-26
I want to lick and sniff a Catholic girl's armpits.
1 Dessin_Francais 2018-11-26
Vermeule "in practice he supports the Democratic party platform."
This is hilariously wrong.
Vermeule worked as a law clerk for Justice Scalia (arch-conservative) and while he supports more deference to the administrative state that is not, by any means, a necessarily liberal position. For example, administrative authority is typically seen as derivative of executive power (at least by conservatives) and Vermeule's advocacy of expanded administrative deference is of a piece with his view of a strong executive. Prominent conservatives were the originators of this modern view of the strong executive, often called "the unitary executive." And while some oppose specific administrative state constructions (such as limits on the president's ability to remove administrators because they limit presidential power), they believe that the president has expansive powers in almost all realms. Think all of the legal scholars who supported Bush's executive actions especially on the war on terror.
Vermeule is also very anti-abortion and anti-gay marriage.
He is not a dem party member by any stretch of the imagination.
1 HungerArtistatlunch 2018-11-26
Traddies hate his takes on immigration though. The whole post is rife with exaggeration and speculation. More of an entertainment piece than anything.
1 ClassicalTheist 2018-11-26
lol but I’ve literally never said the N word on Twitter tho (I think I said nigga/nibba once but so do normies)
1 ClassicalTheist 2018-11-26
interestingly enough everything I said about mixed marriages you can find here by Charles Coulombe, hardly a Catholic known for venting racist sentiment: https://youtu.be/j3TQ6OTrzBc
1 faithandjoy 2018-11-26
Leftcath vs rightcath is hoes vs pimps, and there are people on both sides who are struggling towards complementarity while others are just pure cucks/he man woman haters. Vermeul is actually complementarian and has respect from both sides.
Basically sexual revolution made public the fact that women don’t want to be chaste and men don’t want to be men, and each side is trying to stack the deck in their favor rather than admit they’ve got to struggle for the sake of others and themselves. Matriarchy and patriarchy sink Catholicism, and a Catholic’s loyalty is towards the church (Jesus Christ).
1 bunkerman11 2018-11-26
I really appreciate the effort post. Shit like this is why I come here.
1 HighToryGirl 2018-11-26
Yay, we're Reddit famous!
1 BrackRacker 2018-11-26
I don't know who's lamer. You or them.
1 ILieToCaptchas 2018-11-26
Tip of my hat to you m'autist
Good effort post
1 normiegardener1 2018-11-26
Just here to say reddit is trash k thx
1 kurokamifr 2018-11-26
technicly racism is only wrong when it go in the way of your religious duties, and deshumanisation
the kind of sinful racism like the jews, muslims and mormons believe
jews believe that non-jews arent human and have no soul, while both muslims and mormons believe The Curse of Ham and believe black are damned since birth
one of duty of a catholic is to save the soul/evengelise as many peoples as they can, regardless of their race
tho you have to prioritise your familly, and local community
so racism, is allowed as long it dont go too far
now anti-racism, its a tool used by luciferians to unify humanity to overthrow God
the races and culture were created by God since the tower of babel to separate humanity and never try such arrogance, the EU btw use a lot of babelian imagery
to try to erase the races on the premice of anti-racism is to undo what God did
1 _boethius 2018-11-26
i just wanna say i'm here for it
1 luckyhat4 2018-11-26
What's really weird about this beef is that a lot of "right-wing" Catholics, including the ones involved in the current beef, are actually distributists, which is basically just socialism for racist Tolkien fans.