So this happened on the weekend and I feel like sharing to this wonderful sub
Went out for drinks with a few friends on the weekend. Got a little more dressed up than usual for once because F it, why not? I hardly ever do and it was fun to get ready to bounce on my boy's D.
The night is over and I decide to walk home as where we ended up is very close to my home. I live in a big city, but the area wasn’t bad, it was busy, I wasn’t worried.
I start walking and maybe 5 minutes in, as I’m crossing the street, some SRDine intercepts me as soon as I hit the sidewalk and wraps her arms around my bussy, yanking me into her, and motor-boating my butt. Even with the ultra-purple hairdo, I didn’t even see her coming. I yelled out WTF and pushed her back. This legbeard is clearly drunk, grabs my arms and yanks me back in. Again, I push back and start backing up, telling her to not touch me again. She said something along the lines of “cmon, you can’t be out here lookin this privileged and expect me to not to unpack this, honey” (Since when is grabbing strangers saying hi btw).
She starts walking after me and I see her reaching for me again, so I just faced her and started barking, as loudly and aggressively as I can. Literally like a furry would. I don’t even know why I chose to, I just wanted to do something outrageous to make her back off and think I’m crazy or something.
It worked. The look on her face was priceless. She just turned around and walked away, yelling "Yikes!" the whole time. It was awesome.
I've told many friends to screech like a velociraptor, not half assed either, put your heart and soul into sounding like a giant prehistoric anger chicken of death, and screech as loud as your lungs will let you, not a single person on this planet is prepared for someone to strike a post and screech like a dinosaur, they won't ever know how to respond, they can't.
Literal “REEEEE”.
Actually this is probably good advice for two xers. Keep others far away from you.
I was walking down a dark lane, and I heard a strange hissing sound off to the side, away under the bush. I struck a power pose and yelled "whom goes there, I am a vagina and therefore very powerful, name thyself!". To my shock, a ghostly penis arouse out of the undergrowth and begin its rape incantation. "You will not harm this powerful gender god, BEHOLD MY POWER!" my summoning spell contained no less than 30 sexless white knights, and 2 arch cat lady witches, each with Instagram featuring their LGBQT+-= knitting patterns. The haunted penis shrieked in horror "no, no the awesome power of feminisizia has ruined me, I can no longer rape women. And minorities, or majorities if they are a black nation, or anyone who used the #metoo hashtag, I am DOOMEEEEDD".
Afterwards, my army gathered and held a celebration in my honor. My exalted works are to be housed in the Kingdom of Etsy, near the Church of Fetlife.
(how I see every shitty post on that shitty fucking sub)
I've told many friends to screech like a velociraptor, not half assed either, put your heart and soul into sounding like a giant prehistoric anger chicken of death, and screech as loud as your lungs will let you, not a single person on this planet is prepared for someone to strike a post and screech like a dinosaur, they won't ever know how to respond, they can't.
Translation from magacel cuck-talk: "Go ahead, lay your hands all over the women who matter to me, I'm too afraid of consequences to do anything about it."
Luckily, none, so far. My brother-in-law turned out to be an alright guy. As far as I know, he's never hit my sister. But I'm still planning on buying that gun, because I have the drinking under control, so I think I'll be safe with it.
Well earned, and let's be real: no jury in the world would sympathize with her. Weighed 300 lbs, used those 300 lbs to kill her boyfriend, and literally did it because he wouldn't let her buy fucking crack.
Is there a magical-fantasy-land subreddit for men where I can make up stories in which I am a hero and get patted on the back for it? It honestly looks so damn fun.
My woman-hating credentials are pretty impeccable and the linked story is as fake and gay as everything on reddit but I'm not gonna fault a woman for what she does to get away from an aggressive harasser.
44 comments
1 SnapshillBot 2018-12-04
Have you posted bussy yet?
Snapshots:
I am a bot. (Info / Contact)
1 zappapostrophe 2018-12-04
1 DerekSavageCoolCuck 2018-12-04
So this happened on the weekend and I feel like sharing to this wonderful sub
Went out for drinks with a few friends on the weekend. Got a little more dressed up than usual for once because F it, why not? I hardly ever do and it was fun to get ready to bounce on my boy's D.
The night is over and I decide to walk home as where we ended up is very close to my home. I live in a big city, but the area wasn’t bad, it was busy, I wasn’t worried.
I start walking and maybe 5 minutes in, as I’m crossing the street, some SRDine intercepts me as soon as I hit the sidewalk and wraps her arms around my bussy, yanking me into her, and motor-boating my butt. Even with the ultra-purple hairdo, I didn’t even see her coming. I yelled out WTF and pushed her back. This legbeard is clearly drunk, grabs my arms and yanks me back in. Again, I push back and start backing up, telling her to not touch me again. She said something along the lines of “cmon, you can’t be out here lookin this privileged and expect me to not to unpack this, honey” (Since when is grabbing strangers saying hi btw).
She starts walking after me and I see her reaching for me again, so I just faced her and started barking, as loudly and aggressively as I can. Literally like a furry would. I don’t even know why I chose to, I just wanted to do something outrageous to make her back off and think I’m crazy or something.
It worked. The look on her face was priceless. She just turned around and walked away, yelling "Yikes!" the whole time. It was awesome.
1 definibusmalorum 2018-12-04
It was funny and creative at least.
1 DerekSavageCoolCuck 2018-12-04
Thanks.
1 odintal 2018-12-04
Literal “REEEEE”.
Actually this is probably good advice for two xers. Keep others far away from you.
1 accountforshit 2018-12-04
Audio demonstration
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HrG8nDDd3GE#t=5m48s (5:48)
1 Hill-La-Hill 2018-12-04
u/Cdace looks like we found the girls for you
1 Cdace 2018-12-04
Just cause they’re as big as a dinosaur 🦖 doesn’t make them a dinosaur 🦖
1 -Kite-Man- 2018-12-04
Dude velociraptors were like the size of turkeys.
Isn't this supposed to be kind of your wheelhouse?
1 Cdace 2018-12-04
I said as big as a dinosaur 🦖 not specifically a velociraptor. I was thinking more along the lines of a giganotosaurus 🦖 or a brontosaurus 🦕
1 -OrganisedChaos- 2018-12-04
Apatosaurus?
1 yoavsnake 2018-12-04
Weaponized autism
1 20171245 2018-12-04
This is some 2012 The Oatmeal type humour
1 Vegan_dogfucker 2018-12-04
That's my fetish
1 BigTiddyAnimeWaifu 2018-12-04
she went full Morrissey on the dude
1 memoryplays 2018-12-04
1 2odastream 2018-12-04
something's in the water.
1 2odastream 2018-12-04
specifically in California
1 WaterySphere 2018-12-04
How did I know this would end up on here.
Fat lonely cows barking at random people kinda works for us though
1 SkipperPauline 2018-12-04
I was walking down a dark lane, and I heard a strange hissing sound off to the side, away under the bush. I struck a power pose and yelled "whom goes there, I am a vagina and therefore very powerful, name thyself!". To my shock, a ghostly penis arouse out of the undergrowth and begin its rape incantation. "You will not harm this powerful gender god, BEHOLD MY POWER!" my summoning spell contained no less than 30 sexless white knights, and 2 arch cat lady witches, each with Instagram featuring their LGBQT+-= knitting patterns. The haunted penis shrieked in horror "no, no the awesome power of feminisizia has ruined me, I can no longer rape women. And minorities, or majorities if they are a black nation, or anyone who used the #metoo hashtag, I am DOOMEEEEDD".
Afterwards, my army gathered and held a celebration in my honor. My exalted works are to be housed in the Kingdom of Etsy, near the Church of Fetlife.
(how I see every shitty post on that shitty fucking sub)
1 JayBaumanManhole 2018-12-04
I've told many friends to screech like a velociraptor, not half assed either, put your heart and soul into sounding like a giant prehistoric anger chicken of death, and screech as loud as your lungs will let you, not a single person on this planet is prepared for someone to strike a post and screech like a dinosaur, they won't ever know how to respond, they can't.
This can't be real.
1 cruelandusual 2018-12-04
Jesus Christ, woman, just carry a gun. Men like that deserve to be shot, and no jury would convict you, unless it was composed of Trump voters.
1 CirqueDuFuder 2018-12-04
1 cruelandusual 2018-12-04
Translation from magacel cuck-talk: "Go ahead, lay your hands all over the women who matter to me, I'm too afraid of consequences to do anything about it."
1 CirqueDuFuder 2018-12-04
Ok, tough guy, how many kills have you tallied so far?
1 cruelandusual 2018-12-04
Luckily, none, so far. My brother-in-law turned out to be an alright guy. As far as I know, he's never hit my sister. But I'm still planning on buying that gun, because I have the drinking under control, so I think I'll be safe with it.
1 THOT-AUDITOR 2018-12-04
>be a white woman in the US
>receive serious prison sentences never ever
1 CirqueDuFuder 2018-12-04
There was a link here of a woman getting 18-36 for third degree.
1 dootwthesickness_II 2018-12-04
Because she used her monstrous mass to literally crush a man to death after stabbing him.
1 CirqueDuFuder 2018-12-04
Well yeah I don't mean that it was unjust. It was well earned.
1 dootwthesickness_II 2018-12-04
Well earned, and let's be real: no jury in the world would sympathize with her. Weighed 300 lbs, used those 300 lbs to kill her boyfriend, and literally did it because he wouldn't let her buy fucking crack.
1 nmx179 2018-12-04
Barking is an objectively better plan
1 life_is_painful__ 2018-12-04
😍😍 hot
1 CompetitiveLoiterer 2018-12-04
unzips
a dog is fine too
1 80BAIT08 2018-12-04
I wish he started barking back. What a spectacle.
1 XhotwheelsloverX 2018-12-04
Foids going on a school chewing spree when
1 Milky_Stevens 2018-12-04
Is there a magical-fantasy-land subreddit for men where I can make up stories in which I am a hero and get patted on the back for it? It honestly looks so damn fun.
1 nmx179 2018-12-04
literally r/theredpill
1 MooseHeckler 2018-12-04
Nothing says stability like barking in public.
1 nmx179 2018-12-04
My woman-hating credentials are pretty impeccable and the linked story is as fake and gay as everything on reddit but I'm not gonna fault a woman for what she does to get away from an aggressive harasser.
1 AnnArchist 2018-12-04
thats my fetish
1 Justice4Jamal 2018-12-04
I WONDER WHAT HE LOOKED LIKE??
1 TheSomaCruz 2018-12-04
Current state of mayo gussy.