I like to think that everyone shitty on the Left is just a troll account created and maintained by Barron Trump, attempting to use his mammoth brain to make centrists vote Daddy 2020. Because if these people actually exist, and have these strange opinions that so many people supposedly might have, then I'll have to actually vote for Daddy, given he's the option most likely to put these fucking people in camps.
But I'm wise to you, Barron: you'll never actually make me vote.
Would totally 42 cm haubitze his ass. Like straight-up unload destruction of a german (austrian-hungarian) weapon industry upon his juicy, supple buttocks.
The Hogg has the power to penetrate the conservative mind and drive it insane. Only 2 other people have had this power. Hillary Clinton and Barack Obama.
David Hogg was up earlier than usually. He was super excited. After all, today was his wedding day!
David Hogg danced through the room, sang a little bit and couldn't wait until the evening.
Oh, how excited David Hogg was! Today, he would finally be married to Donald Trump! (A/N Oh yeah, David Hogg is ghey. If you wanna know how that happened, read my other stories!)
Of course for this day, David Hogg had chosen the best wedding cake. And the best wedding catering. And invited all his friends to come (except Michelle Obama cuz she's a bitch).
Donald Trump himself was also up early in the morning, doing his morning stretches and excercise so he'd look nice and buff in his suit.
David Hogg was trying out his wedding dress in front of the mirror There had been a mixup at the dresser but Donald Trump thought it was kind of funny so they went along with it.
But of course, most importantly of all: David Hogg couldn't wait until the actual night. See. David Hogg had a bit of a alarmclock kink. but kept it secret so far. David Hogg felt there had to be at least one thing Donald Trump should only discover on their wedding night! Oh, how excited David Hogg was to finally share that final bit with Donald Trump!
The day was coming along nice. David Hogg received lots of compliments for his dress. Donald Trump looked fabulous in his suit. His muscles nicely toned thanks to the suit being of just the right tightness. Oh, David Hogg loved watching his love. Those sweet lips of him touching the wine glass, soaking them up in the red liquid of the wine. Those lips he could kiss all night long.
And those hands, David Hogg looked at it. Abscentmindedly as someone else was talking to David Hogg while he did so. Donald Trump's hands were so full with power. The way he grabbed David Hogg's hands as they cut the cake. The way he held David Hogg's wrists as he cut the cake into slices. Those hands would be soon on David Hogg's chest.
There was a speech or two. Proclaiming that there had never been such a perfect couple as David Hogg and Donald Trump. That the universe had never seen such love. And everyone cheered and rejoiced. And there were flower petals and rice raining down on them and there were songs being sang in their names.
Or so it should be. Because when David Hogg stood there at the altar about to give his word to Donald Trump. Suddenly! An ExplosioN!
And from the smoke arised no one else but Michelle Obama!
"Stop! You are making a mistake!" Michelle Obama said. "I should be with Donald Trump!!"
~~~~~ A/N Oooooh! Bet you didn't expect that! Sorry ClarisaTheBeautiful, I no I told you I wouldn't do that, but I did! hAHAHAHA! ~~~~ Onto the next chappie!
Everyone who looked could see there was a undeniably, ravenous animal attraction between David Hogg and Donald Trump.
No one could deny it.
No one except Donald Trump and David Hogg, that is.
They seemed blissfully unaware of their attraction to each-other. Unaware of their boundless uncontrollable lust.
Every time they met they didn't show it, but everyone knew. Everyone knew what was really going on between them.
A war of lust.
And everyone knew that it was a unsuitable situation. No one wanted to be dragged into that war.
Something had to be done.Or someone.
The woman stood atop of the rubble while from everywhere Loyal followers came from. They tied up all the wedding guests (and Bernie Sanders, who had been the priest, too!).
"I knew something was up," Michelle Obama said. "You sounded way too happy last time we spat insults at each other." She said as she walked down from the rubble into the wedding area. "Of course, there was also this."
She took out a paper and folded it into an aeroplane. Then she fired it at David Hogg.
David Hogg opened it up and saw... it was their wedding invitation.
Michelle Obama laughed loudly, "Oh yeah, you were willing to invite Ben Shapiro but not me?! So I did what I had the right to do... I went to Ben Shapiro and I defeated her and took her invitation.
David Hogg knew that Michelle Obama could be powerful. Oh yeah, before Michelle Obama turned out to be such a collosal biatch, they had been fighting Ben Shapiro together. But David Hogg didn't know that Michelle Obama could have defeated Ben Shapiro...as long as she had enough motivation!
HAHAHAHAAHA, Michelle Obama laughed. "Now to enact my plan!" Because not only will I stop your wedding, I will make your wedding IMPOSSIBLE!!!
The lackyss took Bernie Sanders and shoved him forward. They did the same thing with Donald Trump.
Michelle Obama walked over to Donald Trump and took his hand. "Now, Bernie Sanders, wed me! Otherwise I will kill all you love! And if you, David Hogg try to stop me....I will ressurrect Ben Shapiro!"
David Hogg felt like he was kicked in the stomach. What an impossible choice! David Hogg thought. Give up the love of David Hogg's life or save the world from Ben Shapiro. It was almost as if fate or God set everythin in motion to torture David Hogg!
But long David Hogg didn't have to be in agony. Because David Hogg had a plan!
In the middle of all this, finally,Ebony could stand it no longer.
He found David Hogg, and pulled them to one side
"Thats it! its ruining the team. Its clear you cant function while Donald Trump is around!"
"What no! I am fine."
"No. Its very clear. You need to do the Relations with them"
Everyone else in the room nodded at this.
"But doing the relations with Donald Trump...isn't that..umm...wrong?"
"Oh, sure, its wrong. Very very wrong.
But just because somethings wrong doesn't mean it shouldn't happen does it?"
"No, I suppose not"
David Hogg wondered off thinking of the relations....how will he introduce the idea to Donald Trump? and would they accept it?
David Hogg finally found a moment to pull Donald Trump away from the others, to have a private moment.
"David Hogg we have to do it"
"I know, my team told me as well. Apparently our feelings are causing problems for everyone else."
"So we are agreed? We finally let our feelings out of their cages of repression they have been caged in all this time?"
"Yes. For the team"
"No...for us"
David Hogg leapt on Donald Trump at that moment.The raging koala they kept locked up finally unleashed.
David Hogg and Donald Trump quickly became a ball of body-parts. Shoulders, anckles and noses all tangled together. David Hogg didn't know what bit to focus on, so grabbed a spare meat stick and dived in.
"More! More! More!" whispered Donald Trump to David Hogg.
Their love making was like a sunrise of penis's. Its like they were everywhere - inescapable (not that either of them wanted to escape them).
Things got...messy...from that point on.
Nearby the others occasionally heard screams. But politely ignored it.
This had been coming far too long to ruin it now - and this team bonding was very much needed.
~~~A/N uuuurgh I'm sorry I'm sorry I'm sorry it took sooo long. I had to find some inspiration because yknow, it fic did end in a really difficult cliffhanger! But after binge watching some netflix, I think I really got a cool thing down now! ~~~~
"Uuuurgh," David Hogg said, putting up his most bored voice, "Well, I didn't really want him anyway, I just said that to rile you up."
"What?!" said Michelle Obama in utter disbelieve.
"Yeaaah, I was just so angry with you over, y'know, that thing. that I decided that I was going to marry Donald Trump just to make you jealous."
And then, then David Hogg thought of the one thing that would make his ruse even better.
"Because really, said David Hogg, I love you."
Michelle Obama stood there baffled. All the security gaurds looked at her unsure what to do now.
"Y... you mean that?" said Michelle Obama.
"Of course not!" said Donald Trump and in that unguarded moment he knocked Michelle Obama unconscious.
"Haha, you didn't expect that to happen, hey Bitch?!" Donald Trump yelled loudly and laughed loudly afterwards.
All the other guests laughed as well.
As did David Hogg.
And afterwards, when the police came and arrested Michelle Obama, the wedding continued.
And as David Hogg predicted. In the evening, finally he could show off his kink. And then it turned out that Donald Trump too had a secret, he whispered at David Hogg, taking off his shirt and revealing that he had been wearing nipple clamps all this time. That was kinda hot as well, David Hogg thought and it became a really really nice night.
Although, deeply, somewhere... David Hogg felt a little doubt over his proclaimation of love towards Michelle Obama. Maybe there was a core of truth in it. Maybe their rivalry was nothing more than a elaborate foreplay? Non-the less. Now it was too late. Donald Trump was David Hogg's life partner now. Although... maybe... when Michelle Obama finally came free, David Hogg might be able to convince Donald Trump to explore more kinks with the both of them....
Nothing was darker than the butthole, the old sage had told David Hogg.
And he also told David Hogg that virtue is the best property in a person. And that David Hogg could be the legendery Chosen One that the prophesies of old and dank and darkness had spoken about.
Oh yes, the Prophecy. That what had made David Hogg lay awake at nights. Of course Michelle Obama had asked what was up with David Hogg.
"Of course," David Hogg would always say, "there is nothing going on, dear. Go back to sleep." And in their minds they'd fill in "You don't have to worry about the terrible burden I will have to carry for the rest of my life"
Because everyone knows, prophesies have a nasty way of coming true. And this one was about to come true spectacularly.
In the darkness of that night, away from the preying eyes and ears of those who would judge, some strangers slipped by unnoticed.
But they were not strangers, they knew each-other. And they knew each-other much closer then any of their friends did realize.
They knew each-other both inside and out. But their friends did not know this. Their friends could not know. Their friends should not know this.
Nor could they know. Because it was night, and thus away from their viscous, judging eyeballs.
"Is it safe?" said the first stranger, who was not a stranger to the other stranger but will remain a stranger to us for the moment.
"I think so. Its dark so none of the others should see us here, even if they are nearby. I think our secret is safe."
"Good. I couldn't take their judgement right now. My life is too stressful as it is. If it wasn't for you I don't know what Id do."
"Don't worry David Hogg, I will always be here for you - waiting in the dark"
"Thanks, Ben Shapiro. I will always be in the dark for you too"
With that the two shadows embraced - an embracement in the night full of passion and romance.
Then our sexy gang knew what to do. They had to infiltrate Ben Shapiro's phallic shaped volcano but in order to do so, they had to wear a disguise.
David Hogg thought long and hard about the best disguise. They couldn't be too obvious or threatening because then Ben Shapiro's guards could catch them. But they couldn't look too mundane because then Ben Shapiro's guards would never let them in.They couldn't go naked, as they were likely to be distracted.By Sex.
No... they had to be clever.
So David Hogg came up with the best idea he had: they would dress up in gothic clothes!
David Hogg's friends were a little skeptic at the idea, but they all agreed it was for the best. But where would they get the best gothic clothing to surprise the guards with?
Michelle Obama knew exactly the best store to go: TBurtons.
So they all went there in the dread of the night and smashed in the doorlock in order to enter the store. Donald Trump deactivated the alarm and so they could easily get into the store and take whatever they need in order to infiltrate Ben Shapiro's headquarters
As normal, David Hogg couldn't help but get embarrassed about getting naked in front of Michelle Obama and Donald Trump in a store at night.He swallowed his blushes and got on with it though.
David Hogg put on nice tight studded leather pantsthat made his trouser lump stand out noticeably. . Then a black tanktop with My Chemical Romance's logo on the back and on top of it all a nice long leather coat with blood-red streaks on the side. Then he painted his nails black and used red to draw little drops of blood on there
Michelle Obama wore a short red skirt with long black stockings that had holes where the toes would go so she could still paint her toenails. And she also had a corset made from demonleather that looked so awesome on her. Over this all she had a long leather coat. Donald Trump also had cool clothes (A/N but I'm running out of imagination to describe it, so I guess he looked like Neo from the Matrix i know it's an old movie but those clothes look soooo cool)
Finally they were ready to face Ben Shapiro!
For a moment time seemed to slowed down. David Hogg wondered why. David Hogg turned around slowly (due to the time seeming to have slowed down).
Then the explanation - Ben Shapiro was secretly looking at him. Looking at him in that special way.
David Hoggs soul lit up like a beacon in the night - even though it was day.
In all of this. In all of this mess. They had eachother, even if eachother was the only ones that knew.
Ben Shapiro turned away at that moment - Time jumped back to normal as David Hogg was no longer transfixiated by Ben Shapiro.
Fortunately no one else had noticed.
They arrived at Ben Shapiro's mansion and entered
"You have arrived I see. Pitty, I was just talking to my Boss"
"Your boss?" said everyone.
"HE MEANS ME!!!"
Suddenly, SATAN appeared behind them!
"OMG" they all said in unison.
"Your G wont save you now, mere mortals"
With that, she struck down his falk and killed Ben Shapiro.
"You bastard. You Will Pay For That.".
"You see? I am evil. I killed. I am Satan"
"Platinums daughter is the most pretty woman in the country." said David Hogg.
"What??"
David Hogg smiled softly as he knew what he meant.
Dramatically,David Hogg pulled out HIS BIBLE!
"With the TRUE word of GOD our savior and with the power of CHRIST I compel you to LEAVE!"
"NOOO ARRGGGG NOT THE HOLY WORD OF GOD! MY POWERS OF COMMUNISM AND GOVERNMENT OVERREACH IS NO MATCH!!!"
Satan exploded with the holy light of justice! .
"This is true power, not that evil magic" said David Hogg flexing His holy biceps!
Some time later in their secret hide-away ;
"I am glade we found a way to survive all that and still be together"
"Yes, our plan seems to have worked despite all the events"
"Do you think anyone spotted us?"
"No"
"No"
"Yes"
Platinum emerged from the shadows of the darkness.
"I know everything" he said.
David Hogg and Ben Shapiro gasped. Their secret was finally revealed!
"I dont love Ben Shapiro like you do" said Platinum "but I have always lusted a bit after them. So you see if Ben Shapiro spends the night with me - I will never tell anyone."
David Hogg breathed a sigh of relief. That was, after all, a reasonable request. They agreed to the bargain.
"Phwee...thats something we can go along with" said Ben Shapiro relieved.
Platinum was happy, and David Hogg and Ben Shapiro thus got to live happily ever after together. With no one but Platinum and themselves ever knowing.
As Satan exploded David Hogg sudden saw Ben Shapiro again in the middle of the explosion.
"Ben Shapiro!"
"Its me, Ben Shapiro. First Satan was inside me and then got out, but during then I was inside Satan. You exploded Satan so only the inside was left which was me."
"Do we need to fight now?"
"No, when I was inside Satan before you exploded him I still heard what you said. What you said about love and The Lord. And how we all have to be good to be saved by him. I want peace now. I have seen the light"
"Oh, thats good, Love has shown you the way"
And with that Ben Shapiro and David Hogg became friends. Ben Shapiro got baptised the following week and David Hogg helped out. After that they had some pineapples and went home.
36 comments
1 SnapshillBot 2018-12-19
I like to think that everyone shitty on the Left is just a troll account created and maintained by Barron Trump, attempting to use his mammoth brain to make centrists vote Daddy 2020. Because if these people actually exist, and have these strange opinions that so many people supposedly might have, then I'll have to actually vote for Daddy, given he's the option most likely to put these fucking people in camps.
But I'm wise to you, Barron: you'll never actually make me vote.
Snapshots:
I am a bot. (Info / Contact)
1 RealJackAnchor 2018-12-19
Who is downvoting Snappy? What disrespect. If I see Snappy downvoted to -2 ever again...
1 automatic_cluck 2018-12-19
Tussy?
1 slaytina44 2018-12-19
Anderson Cooper agrees
1 HungerArtistatlunch 2018-12-19
I always pictured Cooper as a bottom.
1 dootwthesickness_II 2018-12-19
Nah, Coop is too much of a daddy.
1 HungerArtistatlunch 2018-12-19
I would def stick my semi-automatic Assault Rifle-15 with bump stock up his bussy and unload my entire clipazine if you know what I'm saying.
1 Honk4Tits 2018-12-19
Elaborate pls
1 HungerArtistatlunch 2018-12-19
That's code for "hope he does well on his finals."
1 ironicshitpostr 2018-12-19
"in Minecraft"
1 ineed750bucks 2018-12-19
Would totally 42 cm haubitze his ass. Like straight-up unload destruction of a german (austrian-hungarian) weapon industry upon his juicy, supple buttocks.
1 Ed_ButteredToast 2018-12-19
1 HungerArtistatlunch 2018-12-19
I have been banned before. Not a big deal.
1 -6x- 2018-12-19
1 GreatnessPersonified 2018-12-19
Its over for hoggcel
1 dootwthesickness_II 2018-12-19
Who is that guy? You’re right, he is a pretty gay.
1 e-guy 2018-12-19
you're not down with the hogg?
He probably should win a subreddit award for best young drama generator or something tbh. He had a great record this year for dramatic happenings.
1 Momruepari 2018-12-19
he has a reddit account apparently. imagine if we could ping
1 DrZerglingMD 2018-12-19
now I wanna see him crying on twitter about us
1 queerjihad 2018-12-19
this is /r/drama, gay is a compliment around here
breeders need to be gulaged
1 EternallyMiffed 2018-12-19
That's next level gay flair
1 e-guy 2018-12-19
thank you, I'm happy someone appreciates it. Cropped gay porn makes the best flair, imo.
1 shitpost953 2018-12-19
1 RealJackAnchor 2018-12-19
I mean that look is obviously [GONE SEXUAL]
1 CoolBeansBussyBoi 2018-12-19
He's 18. Trust me, I've looked into this and confirmed it.
1 BigBrownDog12 2018-12-19
The Hogg has the power to penetrate the conservative mind and drive it insane. Only 2 other people have had this power. Hillary Clinton and Barack Obama.
1 haulingtaters 2018-12-19
Buzz cut girl got upstaged by that Brooklyn congress lady, sad!
1 OnlyRacistOnReddit 2018-12-19
Has he come out of the closet yet?
1 CoolBeansBussyBoi 2018-12-19
I need gay David Hogg fanfic so badly
1 queerjihad 2018-12-19
David Hogg was up earlier than usually. He was super excited. After all, today was his wedding day! David Hogg danced through the room, sang a little bit and couldn't wait until the evening. Oh, how excited David Hogg was! Today, he would finally be married to Donald Trump! (A/N Oh yeah, David Hogg is ghey. If you wanna know how that happened, read my other stories!)
Of course for this day, David Hogg had chosen the best wedding cake. And the best wedding catering. And invited all his friends to come (except Michelle Obama cuz she's a bitch). Donald Trump himself was also up early in the morning, doing his morning stretches and excercise so he'd look nice and buff in his suit. David Hogg was trying out his wedding dress in front of the mirror There had been a mixup at the dresser but Donald Trump thought it was kind of funny so they went along with it.
But of course, most importantly of all: David Hogg couldn't wait until the actual night. See. David Hogg had a bit of a alarmclock kink. but kept it secret so far. David Hogg felt there had to be at least one thing Donald Trump should only discover on their wedding night! Oh, how excited David Hogg was to finally share that final bit with Donald Trump!
The day was coming along nice. David Hogg received lots of compliments for his dress. Donald Trump looked fabulous in his suit. His muscles nicely toned thanks to the suit being of just the right tightness. Oh, David Hogg loved watching his love. Those sweet lips of him touching the wine glass, soaking them up in the red liquid of the wine. Those lips he could kiss all night long. And those hands, David Hogg looked at it. Abscentmindedly as someone else was talking to David Hogg while he did so. Donald Trump's hands were so full with power. The way he grabbed David Hogg's hands as they cut the cake. The way he held David Hogg's wrists as he cut the cake into slices. Those hands would be soon on David Hogg's chest.
There was a speech or two. Proclaiming that there had never been such a perfect couple as David Hogg and Donald Trump. That the universe had never seen such love. And everyone cheered and rejoiced. And there were flower petals and rice raining down on them and there were songs being sang in their names.
Or so it should be. Because when David Hogg stood there at the altar about to give his word to Donald Trump. Suddenly! An ExplosioN!
And from the smoke arised no one else but Michelle Obama!
"Stop! You are making a mistake!" Michelle Obama said. "I should be with Donald Trump!!"
~~~~~ A/N Oooooh! Bet you didn't expect that! Sorry ClarisaTheBeautiful, I no I told you I wouldn't do that, but I did! hAHAHAHA! ~~~~ Onto the next chappie! Everyone who looked could see there was a undeniably, ravenous animal attraction between David Hogg and Donald Trump. No one could deny it. No one except Donald Trump and David Hogg, that is.
They seemed blissfully unaware of their attraction to each-other. Unaware of their boundless uncontrollable lust. Every time they met they didn't show it, but everyone knew. Everyone knew what was really going on between them.
A war of lust.
And everyone knew that it was a unsuitable situation. No one wanted to be dragged into that war. Something had to be done.Or someone. The woman stood atop of the rubble while from everywhere Loyal followers came from. They tied up all the wedding guests (and Bernie Sanders, who had been the priest, too!).
"I knew something was up," Michelle Obama said. "You sounded way too happy last time we spat insults at each other." She said as she walked down from the rubble into the wedding area. "Of course, there was also this." She took out a paper and folded it into an aeroplane. Then she fired it at David Hogg.
David Hogg opened it up and saw... it was their wedding invitation. Michelle Obama laughed loudly, "Oh yeah, you were willing to invite Ben Shapiro but not me?! So I did what I had the right to do... I went to Ben Shapiro and I defeated her and took her invitation.
David Hogg knew that Michelle Obama could be powerful. Oh yeah, before Michelle Obama turned out to be such a collosal biatch, they had been fighting Ben Shapiro together. But David Hogg didn't know that Michelle Obama could have defeated Ben Shapiro...as long as she had enough motivation!
HAHAHAHAAHA, Michelle Obama laughed. "Now to enact my plan!" Because not only will I stop your wedding, I will make your wedding IMPOSSIBLE!!! The lackyss took Bernie Sanders and shoved him forward. They did the same thing with Donald Trump.
Michelle Obama walked over to Donald Trump and took his hand. "Now, Bernie Sanders, wed me! Otherwise I will kill all you love! And if you, David Hogg try to stop me....I will ressurrect Ben Shapiro!"
David Hogg felt like he was kicked in the stomach. What an impossible choice! David Hogg thought. Give up the love of David Hogg's life or save the world from Ben Shapiro. It was almost as if fate or God set everythin in motion to torture David Hogg!
But long David Hogg didn't have to be in agony. Because David Hogg had a plan!
In the middle of all this, finally,Ebony could stand it no longer. He found David Hogg, and pulled them to one side
"Thats it! its ruining the team. Its clear you cant function while Donald Trump is around!" "What no! I am fine." "No. Its very clear. You need to do the Relations with them" Everyone else in the room nodded at this. "But doing the relations with Donald Trump...isn't that..umm...wrong?" "Oh, sure, its wrong. Very very wrong. But just because somethings wrong doesn't mean it shouldn't happen does it?" "No, I suppose not" David Hogg wondered off thinking of the relations....how will he introduce the idea to Donald Trump? and would they accept it? David Hogg finally found a moment to pull Donald Trump away from the others, to have a private moment. "David Hogg we have to do it" "I know, my team told me as well. Apparently our feelings are causing problems for everyone else." "So we are agreed? We finally let our feelings out of their cages of repression they have been caged in all this time?" "Yes. For the team" "No...for us" David Hogg leapt on Donald Trump at that moment.The raging koala they kept locked up finally unleashed. David Hogg and Donald Trump quickly became a ball of body-parts. Shoulders, anckles and noses all tangled together. David Hogg didn't know what bit to focus on, so grabbed a spare meat stick and dived in. "More! More! More!" whispered Donald Trump to David Hogg. Their love making was like a sunrise of penis's. Its like they were everywhere - inescapable (not that either of them wanted to escape them). Things got...messy...from that point on.
Nearby the others occasionally heard screams. But politely ignored it. This had been coming far too long to ruin it now - and this team bonding was very much needed. ~~~
A/N uuuurgh I'm sorry I'm sorry I'm sorry it took sooo long. I had to find some inspiration because yknow, it fic did end in a really difficult cliffhanger! But after binge watching some netflix, I think I really got a cool thing down now! ~~~~"Uuuurgh," David Hogg said, putting up his most bored voice, "Well, I didn't really want him anyway, I just said that to rile you up."
"What?!" said Michelle Obama in utter disbelieve.
"Yeaaah, I was just so angry with you over, y'know, that thing. that I decided that I was going to marry Donald Trump just to make you jealous."
And then, then David Hogg thought of the one thing that would make his ruse even better.
"Because really, said David Hogg, I love you."
Michelle Obama stood there baffled. All the security gaurds looked at her unsure what to do now.
"Y... you mean that?" said Michelle Obama.
"Of course not!" said Donald Trump and in that unguarded moment he knocked Michelle Obama unconscious.
"Haha, you didn't expect that to happen, hey Bitch?!" Donald Trump yelled loudly and laughed loudly afterwards. All the other guests laughed as well. As did David Hogg.
And afterwards, when the police came and arrested Michelle Obama, the wedding continued.
And as David Hogg predicted. In the evening, finally he could show off his kink. And then it turned out that Donald Trump too had a secret, he whispered at David Hogg, taking off his shirt and revealing that he had been wearing nipple clamps all this time. That was kinda hot as well, David Hogg thought and it became a really really nice night.
Although, deeply, somewhere... David Hogg felt a little doubt over his proclaimation of love towards Michelle Obama. Maybe there was a core of truth in it. Maybe their rivalry was nothing more than a elaborate foreplay? Non-the less. Now it was too late. Donald Trump was David Hogg's life partner now. Although... maybe... when Michelle Obama finally came free, David Hogg might be able to convince Donald Trump to explore more kinks with the both of them....
1 LongPostBot 2018-12-19
That degree finally paying off
I am a bot. Contact for questions
1 queerjihad 2018-12-19
Here's another one:
Nothing was darker than the butthole, the old sage had told David Hogg.
And he also told David Hogg that virtue is the best property in a person. And that David Hogg could be the legendery Chosen One that the prophesies of old and dank and darkness had spoken about.
Oh yes, the Prophecy. That what had made David Hogg lay awake at nights. Of course Michelle Obama had asked what was up with David Hogg.
"Of course," David Hogg would always say, "there is nothing going on, dear. Go back to sleep." And in their minds they'd fill in "You don't have to worry about the terrible burden I will have to carry for the rest of my life"
Because everyone knows, prophesies have a nasty way of coming true. And this one was about to come true spectacularly. In the darkness of that night, away from the preying eyes and ears of those who would judge, some strangers slipped by unnoticed.
But they were not strangers, they knew each-other. And they knew each-other much closer then any of their friends did realize. They knew each-other both inside and out. But their friends did not know this. Their friends could not know. Their friends should not know this. Nor could they know. Because it was night, and thus away from their viscous, judging eyeballs.
"Is it safe?" said the first stranger, who was not a stranger to the other stranger but will remain a stranger to us for the moment.
"I think so. Its dark so none of the others should see us here, even if they are nearby. I think our secret is safe."
"Good. I couldn't take their judgement right now. My life is too stressful as it is. If it wasn't for you I don't know what Id do." "Don't worry David Hogg, I will always be here for you - waiting in the dark" "Thanks, Ben Shapiro. I will always be in the dark for you too"
With that the two shadows embraced - an embracement in the night full of passion and romance.
Then our sexy gang knew what to do. They had to infiltrate Ben Shapiro's phallic shaped volcano but in order to do so, they had to wear a disguise.
David Hogg thought long and hard about the best disguise. They couldn't be too obvious or threatening because then Ben Shapiro's guards could catch them. But they couldn't look too mundane because then Ben Shapiro's guards would never let them in.They couldn't go naked, as they were likely to be distracted.By Sex. No... they had to be clever.
So David Hogg came up with the best idea he had: they would dress up in gothic clothes! David Hogg's friends were a little skeptic at the idea, but they all agreed it was for the best. But where would they get the best gothic clothing to surprise the guards with? Michelle Obama knew exactly the best store to go: TBurtons.
So they all went there in the dread of the night and smashed in the doorlock in order to enter the store. Donald Trump deactivated the alarm and so they could easily get into the store and take whatever they need in order to infiltrate Ben Shapiro's headquarters
As normal, David Hogg couldn't help but get embarrassed about getting naked in front of Michelle Obama and Donald Trump in a store at night.He swallowed his blushes and got on with it though.
David Hogg put on nice tight studded leather pantsthat made his trouser lump stand out noticeably. . Then a black tanktop with My Chemical Romance's logo on the back and on top of it all a nice long leather coat with blood-red streaks on the side. Then he painted his nails black and used red to draw little drops of blood on there Michelle Obama wore a short red skirt with long black stockings that had holes where the toes would go so she could still paint her toenails. And she also had a corset made from demonleather that looked so awesome on her. Over this all she had a long leather coat. Donald Trump also had cool clothes (A/N but I'm running out of imagination to describe it, so I guess he looked like Neo from the Matrix i know it's an old movie but those clothes look soooo cool)
Finally they were ready to face Ben Shapiro!
For a moment time seemed to slowed down. David Hogg wondered why. David Hogg turned around slowly (due to the time seeming to have slowed down). Then the explanation - Ben Shapiro was secretly looking at him. Looking at him in that special way. David Hoggs soul lit up like a beacon in the night - even though it was day.
In all of this. In all of this mess. They had eachother, even if eachother was the only ones that knew. Ben Shapiro turned away at that moment - Time jumped back to normal as David Hogg was no longer transfixiated by Ben Shapiro. Fortunately no one else had noticed. They arrived at Ben Shapiro's mansion and entered "You have arrived I see. Pitty, I was just talking to my Boss" "Your boss?" said everyone. "HE MEANS ME!!!" Suddenly, SATAN appeared behind them!
"OMG" they all said in unison. "Your G wont save you now, mere mortals" With that, she struck down his falk and killed Ben Shapiro. "You bastard. You Will Pay For That.". "You see? I am evil. I killed. I am Satan" "Platinums daughter is the most pretty woman in the country." said David Hogg. "What??" David Hogg smiled softly as he knew what he meant. Dramatically,David Hogg pulled out HIS BIBLE! "With the TRUE word of GOD our savior and with the power of CHRIST I compel you to LEAVE!" "NOOO ARRGGGG NOT THE HOLY WORD OF GOD! MY POWERS OF COMMUNISM AND GOVERNMENT OVERREACH IS NO MATCH!!!"
Satan exploded with the holy light of justice! . "This is true power, not that evil magic" said David Hogg flexing His holy biceps! Some time later in their secret hide-away ;
"I am glade we found a way to survive all that and still be together" "Yes, our plan seems to have worked despite all the events" "Do you think anyone spotted us?" "No" "No" "Yes" Platinum emerged from the shadows of the darkness. "I know everything" he said. David Hogg and Ben Shapiro gasped. Their secret was finally revealed!
"I dont love Ben Shapiro like you do" said Platinum "but I have always lusted a bit after them. So you see if Ben Shapiro spends the night with me - I will never tell anyone." David Hogg breathed a sigh of relief. That was, after all, a reasonable request. They agreed to the bargain. "Phwee...thats something we can go along with" said Ben Shapiro relieved. Platinum was happy, and David Hogg and Ben Shapiro thus got to live happily ever after together. With no one but Platinum and themselves ever knowing. As Satan exploded David Hogg sudden saw Ben Shapiro again in the middle of the explosion. "Ben Shapiro!" "Its me, Ben Shapiro. First Satan was inside me and then got out, but during then I was inside Satan. You exploded Satan so only the inside was left which was me." "Do we need to fight now?" "No, when I was inside Satan before you exploded him I still heard what you said. What you said about love and The Lord. And how we all have to be good to be saved by him. I want peace now. I have seen the light" "Oh, thats good, Love has shown you the way"
And with that Ben Shapiro and David Hogg became friends. Ben Shapiro got baptised the following week and David Hogg helped out. After that they had some pineapples and went home.
The End.
1 LongPostBot 2018-12-19
I've known more coherent downies.
I am a bot. Contact for questions
1 yamabikos 2018-12-19
post gary bussy
1 Mariokartfever 2018-12-19
Here’s a GOOD tip: chapofags are too scared to say the N-word
Use it in our secret meetings to root them out!
1 Michelanvalo 2018-12-19
Malcolm in the middle looking dumbass mother fucker