Here’s my old fat rat, RIP 🐀

Owning rats must be tough. They seem similar to cats and dogs in terms of how domestic they are but only have a fraction of the lifespan. Or a similar lifespan to some disgustingly inbred breeds of large dogs and neglected cats.

1 ironicshitpostr 2018-12-19

Wow /u/Zachums you just going to sit there and take that

1 CoolBeansBussyBoi 2018-12-19

My boyfriend got one from his coworker and at first I was disgusted he brought a rodent into his home, then some time passed and before I knew it it was a year later and I was grown man crying when we woke up to find him deceased.

They're like tiny little dogs, I shit you not. We taught him how to play fetch. He had a distinct personality. It's nothing like a mouse or a hamster as I'd previously thought. But year, they live 1-3 years tops. It's depressing as hell.

1 Bleedlikeink 2018-12-19

So why is there a photo of you strangling your rat on the inter webs?

source: https://external-preview.redd.it/UgAAu3xVlvZoQ0GErdyJfMOHHnDDudU_7pG6xIy0hvo.jpg?width=576&auto=webp&s=bfadb53c425fa208e150bad437b1b356dd19a074

1 Jas0nJewnova 2018-12-19

It's over for ratcels 😪

1 Dramatictuna 2018-12-19

Thicc rat looking pleased.

1 GeauxHouston22 2018-12-19

what was his name? I'm not really into rats but he is pretty cute

1 Scarytownterminator 2018-12-19

His name was bender because he had the personality of a bastard, drunk robot.

1 Dramatictuna 2018-12-19

rat probably

1 DrZerglingMD 2018-12-19

Did he have his own separate cage with blackjack and mouse hookers?

1 Scarytownterminator 2018-12-19

He definitely had his own toys that he pissed on and a bag full of yogurt treats. I guess that’s sort of the same thing?

1 Shootzilla 2018-12-19

Rodents fucking love yogurt treats. That's better than blackjack and hookers.

1 Scarytownterminator 2018-12-19

True story, he learned how to undo the locks on his cage and while I was at work, he would get out and climb to the top in order to pilfer the yogurt treat bag.

1 Shootzilla 2018-12-19

When I had a hamster I tried one of those yogurt treats, not proud of it. But they were pretty good. If I was a hamster or rat you'd bet I'd figure out a way to get those fucking things.

1 The_Great_I_Am_Not 2018-12-19

One of my favorite lines from the entire series is the were-car episode where from accuses Bender of seeing things.....

” poor Bender, you're seeing things. You're too drunk.... Or not drunk enough. I forget how it works with you."

1 Michelanvalo 2018-12-19

I came here with a simple dream...a dream of killing all humans. And this is how it must end? Who's the real seven billion ton robot monster here? Not I... Not I...

1 Strictlybutters 2018-12-19

Isn’t it obvious that’s Taylor swift or is this your first time seeing a taypost ^TM ?

1 ineed750bucks 2018-12-19

Oh wow, she fixed her teeth, neato

1 NormanImmanuel 2018-12-19

1 MAMStoic 2018-12-19

Why not get a cuter rodent like a guinea pig?

1 Dramatictuna 2018-12-19

Ree ree ree 🐽

1 Ed_ButteredToast 2018-12-19

YIKES!! 🤢🤢🤮🤮

RIP

🎉🎈 https://i.imgur.com/o4DuDr5.gifv 🎈🎉

1 chunk_o 2018-12-19

We is made because rats and pajeets fight for scraps near the gutters.

Natural enemies 🤠

1 Ed_ButteredToast 2018-12-19

If only there more subs like r/Dogfree. Pet drama is on the rise these days.

1 LightUmbra 2018-12-19

Why are you yikesing a taypost.

1 Ed_ButteredToast 2018-12-19

/u/DistortedLines THEY'RE BEING MEAN AGAIN!! 😡

1 DistortedLines 2018-12-19

How dude!!!!! 😡

1 HorrorPitch 2018-12-19

Please change your flair. She is no longer our kween

1 DistortedLines 2018-12-19

STOP

1 Starship_Litterbox_C 2018-12-19

😻😻😻😻😻

1 Dramatictuna 2018-12-19

No eat!

1 Starship_Litterbox_C 2018-12-19

https://i.imgur.com/V0YAkv7.gifv

1 TontoGoldbergCA 2018-12-19

Where did you get a gif of Lena Dunham's gussy?

1 alphachapman 2018-12-19

not posting your hog smh

1 AutoModerator 2018-12-19

Post your bussy or get out OUT OUT!

I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns.

1 alphachapman 2018-12-19

dramas all i have to live for i cant leave 😢😢😢

1 Arthanias 2018-12-19

Well then follow the bot's command!

1 MzCherryBlossom 2018-12-19

Kinda cute if you’re into rats. Sorry you’ve lost a pet. You could get a girlie one next and call it Tay.

1 DrZerglingMD 2018-12-19

He should get a Fennec Fox. Those things are cute as fuck and even a mayo like OP could get some pity sex.

1 Scarytownterminator 2018-12-19

Jokes on you, my (((Jew))) wife is the one that convinced me to get him.

1 DrZerglingMD 2018-12-19

Don't you talk about her family members that way!

1 ineed750bucks 2018-12-19

(((Him)))

1 MzCherryBlossom 2018-12-19

Just looked them up they look like Gizmo. :)

1 DrZerglingMD 2018-12-19

I gotta wait till I have a house or something because these guys are nocturnal animals. But that fluffy tail and ears is too cute

1 MzCherryBlossom 2018-12-19

You’ll need to look for a super cute one when you get a place.

1 SinisterSintram 2018-12-19

The screeching sounds they make are horrible though, and they're not quite as domesticated as regular pets (or as clever as rats). They live longer than rats though.

1 NoChickswithDicks 2018-12-19

Sorry about your loss. People say rats are very friendly and personable.

1 Quietus42 2018-12-19

I've got a bunch of them. They're great pets but they require a lot of upkeep and socialization. I wouldn't recommend them if you're lazy.

1 lets_move_to_voat 2018-12-19

rats are cool af. wish they lived longer

1 Slack_Irritant 2018-12-19

Yeah, that's the only reason I stopped getting them. They are an awesome pet, but their short lifespans are tough to go through.

Condolences to OP.

1 Scarytownterminator 2018-12-19

That and he destroyed my pillow cases and bedding, the little fuck was something else. Awesome to hang out with drunk though and feed pieces of meat to.

1 Grifmandamn 2018-12-19

How long did he live?

1 Scarytownterminator 2018-12-19

He lived to be about 2 years old. Though his personality will last a lifetime. I’ve never met something that’s as selfish as he was and also loved me at the same time. They really are the best pets.

1 sheepinblack 2018-12-19

Mole rats can get to like 30.

1 Rylonthepylon 2018-12-19

How hard is it caring for a miniature pet because I’m tryna find a reason to keep living through making a good lad rely on me

1 sheepinblack 2018-12-19

Not much more than a guinea pig supposedly. https://www.zoomoments.com/index.php/articles/categories/animals/66-how-difficult-is-it-to-keep-naked-mole-rats#

1 Rylonthepylon 2018-12-19

Hmm i hope apartment complexes wouldn’t be too loud for their sensitive ass rat ears

1 gilmore606 2018-12-19

i used to live in cleveland, so i can assure you rats have no problem living in apartment complexes

1 CantWakeUpJPG 2018-12-19

They look like penises, tho.

1 bittah_prophet 2018-12-19

1 RandolphCox 2018-12-19

you have feminine hands if youre a guy and if youre a girl theyre kind of masculine

1 Scarytownterminator 2018-12-19

being upset that not everyone has ham fingers

SMH

1 RandolphCox 2018-12-19

no comment im still flustered at your sissy trans hands

1 MzCherryBlossom 2018-12-19

It’s a guy you can tell by the thumbs.

1 RandolphCox 2018-12-19

what about the feminine looking legs and ability for the legs to be squashed together so tightly? like complete absence of any dick or balls to be concered about?

1 kabutoredde 2018-12-19

idk what kind of balls you got that makes you unable to cross your legs like that but they sound impressive

1 RandolphCox 2018-12-19

it sounds like you have small balls. like dick nipples girl could castrate you witha nail clipper

1 kabutoredde 2018-12-19

i think you just got unga bunga coconuts my friend

1 GeauxHouston22 2018-12-19

huge balls, lil dick

I can relate

1 MzCherryBlossom 2018-12-19

But he’s not crossing his legs so must be a real man.

1 Metal_Charizard 2018-12-19

Thought you were talking like a greasy Italian at first with your “stunnedat” typo.

Fuckina stunad

1 RandolphCox 2018-12-19

all my messages here have layers of jokes so you are correct i meant tod othat

1 tallwheel 2018-12-19

non-binary hands

1 El_Guero_Alto 2018-12-19

My condolences.

Press F to pay respects to Bender.

1 VoxAnglii 2018-12-19

1 wholecanofpringles 2018-12-19

oho thats a fatto ratto haha

1 Vurtizontal 2018-12-19

I always wanted a rat but i don't get one cause i know they live so few years. Can't deal with that.

RIP rat buddy, may you have open field to run and eat grain, in heaven.

1 Bleedlikeink 2018-12-19

I'm pretty sure rats like open dumpsters and basements apartments a lot more than open fields and grain, but what do I know, I'm just a guy who's never seen a rat in an open field eating grain.

1 Osterion 2018-12-19

rip mr.rat

1 cmakk1012 2018-12-19

FUCK FUCKING RATS, MY FUCKING ASSTARDED APARTMENT BUILDING WON’T FIX THE HOLES WHERE THE RATS COME IN AND PISS AND SHIT ALL OVER OUR KITCHEN

REEEEEEEEEEEE

1 Dramatictuna 2018-12-19

and who could forget...

1 snallygaster 2018-12-19

Get a cat if you can handle seeing rats murdered in an extremely cruel manner.

1 Potatoe_away 2018-12-19

Or a miniature dachshund.

1 cmakk1012 2018-12-19

That’d make me hard tbh

1 Bleedlikeink 2018-12-19

Have you ever thought of making them a rat piss and shit box. If they had a place to piss and shit you wouldn't have piss and shit all over your kitchen. Rants don't use the internets, they have no way of telling you don't want them pissing and shitting all over your kitchen.

source: am not rat

1 Burger_Jackaroo 2018-12-19

💩 Shit or piss🍺 I guess they never 🌀flush, huh? 🚽 You got a⛲ bathroom 🚹attendant🚺, I bet he doesn't offer ya 🍬🍬🍬 breath mints 🍻 mwah 🍻He gon' find another 😬 stall ♿🚪and he won't spritz 💦💦 ya 🙊 He gon' shart 😣💨💨and hit the🌋 john 🚽 like Wiz Khalifa 📣📣

1 kabutoredde 2018-12-19

cute rato

1 melokobeai 2018-12-19

Hello rato

1 trilateral1 2018-12-19

Ratatouille IRL

1 Kipkluif 2018-12-19

Tbis is so sad, alexa play time lapse

1 AlexaPlayBot 2018-12-19

Now playing: MASSIVE Pool Construction Timelapse.

^{^{ stop messaging me | programmer | source | banlist}}

1 Kipkluif 2018-12-19

Bad bot I wanted Time Lapse by TheFatRat

1 ShitsureiKamisama 2018-12-19

Where are his genitals? And are you wearing that sweater unironically?

1 Karmaisforsuckers 2018-12-19

Every girl who has a pet rat has a nasty stinky vagina

1 PacificNorthwestCzar 2018-12-19

D U D E

1 OnionBits 2018-12-19

Sorry for your loss

Owning rats are hard because they are cute and intelligent like cats and dogs but only live for 2 years

1 DConstructed 2018-12-19

That is a very photogenic and patient rat. I'm sorry for your loss.

1 Bill__Killionaires 2018-12-19

Anyone that has a pet instead of a significant other is a joke in my mind. Not even joking here, I'm seeing this phenomenon more and more lately. Try not to spill your soy juice everywhere please

1 OneLastSmile 2018-12-19

poor ratbro

1 ZMowlcher 2018-12-19

Rats are great. If you want a longer living rat, and you live in the UK, think about getting a Gambian Pouched Rat. They live for about 7 years. The only downside to rats are their unfortunate life span, they're honestly the best pets.

1 gigi-has-issues 2018-12-19

I can tell he or she was a good guy. 😇 RIP

1 EarnestNoMeta 2018-12-19

CHONK

how long did she live?

1 LedinToke 2018-12-19

1 misspussy 2018-12-19

I had a few pet rats growing up. One if my rats, I sat on his tail by accident and it ripped off. The other one ate her babies. They are awesome!

1 Zoll999 2018-12-19

Aweee

1 Pukalo_Reincarnate 2018-12-19

It's illegal to have a pet rat where I live.