I must commend you on your choice of profile pics; they really advertise your biological prowess. Your voluptuous figure, along with your fair complexion, tells me that you are healthy, and therefore would make a great choice for a breeding partner. I must ask though, How would you rate your ability to climb trees? I ask because, in the off chance a ground predator were to loom the horizon we could both escape via the trees without me having to risk my life in an attempt to defend you from said predator. If my instincts are correct, then I believe a biological pairing between us may be a practical and mutually benefitting affair. Would you be available for some light discourse? That is very good to know, since I could not possibly fathom being with a girl who cannot climb trees. This is going splendid so far. How would you rate your abilities is combat?

Eat shit bitch

mfw

implying I haven't alienated all existing friends and family that would be potential sources of drama

Good one

this but unironically, although one could consider it drama

I keep my phone in airplane mode with wifi on so that I can browse reddit and no one else can call or text me

Mod him now

This unironically. Except the family tho. They're good eggs.

A coworker told me she was a flat earther and I laughed at her so she rescinded the invitation to her christmas party.

I mean, she's nice but I only wanted to go because her friend is cute.

lol @ globers cucking themselves

Nah fam

another year of no snally gf

Nice wsgypost

Also same

Implying jew mommy isn't hotter

Khazar milkies

/u/annoysthegoys post milkers

No bobs for you!

Is snally the name of squidward's snail

I yearn to stroke your boobs, snally

Fag

I will see the lower corner of her left nipple, right where the skin changes color, and it'll be amazing.

tranny tits

Yikes

I went to my Mother in laws and I ended up having diarrhea, so I am in virtually none of the Christmas pictures because I was spraying projectile dirty pudding out my ass for most of my time there.

Competent cooking can only protect your gastrointestinal so much when you're eating Filipino food.

Pa rump pum pum pum

Nope it's pretty dry here for drama

I beef I started was involved in with some non-blood family about 8 months ago has split the holidays, resulting in the best holiday season I've had in a decade. Also, the woman on the other side of the split has gotten very fat which I think also means I'm winning.

She always talked down to someone else in my family that's blood related to her so I already didn't like her. I found out about her skimming some money off her rich dad and ran my mouth about it because I hated her. She and I ended up at the same table somewhere some night after that and both pretended to be pleasant but multiple people told me she was talking shit whenever I would stand up. A couple people left over it.

She was trying to talk big about how much smarter she is than everyone at some point later in the night. I pointed out some major and embarrassing academic failures of hers she didn't know anyone knew about. She likes to pretend to be some genius when really she's one of the dumbest people I've ever met. Anyway, she was fucking floored and went on a drunken rant. I snapped back a few choice lines and she ranted even more.

After that the lines were drawn and we started dividing people up.

no drama, except for a play I saw yesterday

My older sister arranged to host the family party in her house this year. Christmas jumpers a requirement and a gift for the secret Santa.

Everyone bought shitty jumpers and secret Santa gift and the cow cancelled with less than 24 hours notice and no time before Christmas to arrange another party. Zero reason given.

She’s done minor shit like this when she’s been on the Prosecco and then changed her mind next day but this is her first major sting. I thought maybe financial reasons or something like that but my other sister said she just got a 15K raise and turned down her Xmas bonus. Wtf. She’s a total cow! I didn’t wish her a Merry Christmas!

Yeah I know. I think she’s menopausal tbh.

Why would she turn down a bonus?

If you earn more money you pay more taxes - retards

She works accounts she’s very creative.

Fake altruism!

Nothin crazy. Couple of my girl sisters can't help but snarky barbs at each other.

Disappointed this isn't about snarlly's personal drama.

what did y'all have for dinner

can i hook up with ur grandpa and help him feel better? 🤗

Dusty bussy is best bussy.

On Christmas Eve Eve my mom yelled at me for telling my sister to get out of the kitchen since she was in the way watching YouTube videos while we were making dinner. My mom got mad at my tone and started screaming and swearing at me, so I left the room, then my parents yelled at each other about the fact she was swearing, and then she grabbed her car keys and drove away for a while, then she came back and went in my room and said sorry and I said ok and left my room because she just was standing there and I didn't like it and then she went up and talked to my sister and apparently my sister yelled at her so she left again but this time she had a suit case and said she was leaving and then my sister said she can't leave and my mom said she was going to and my sister asked where she would go and she just said "I'll know when I get there" and she drove away again and then came back because she forgot something I guess and then my dad told her she should not leave and she said "clearly I'm not making anyone happy by being here so I'm leaving" and my dad said that she should reconsider and she finally went to bed

Mrw

That's quite a sentence

Lol sounds like the retard apple (you) didn’t fall too far from the retard tree (your family)

I had a dream on Christmas Eve that Kevin Spacey was POTUS. I don't mean a character played by Kevin Spacey, I mean Kevin Spacey himself. He was being impeached for his bussy-banditry, and for some reason Mike Pence was his VP.

a spacey/pence ticket is genius because it gets the lgbt base and the anti-lgbt base.

thats like 100% of america

Not xmas related but recent during a visit with my fam my dad got angry and literally rage quit to his bedroom at 6pm and wouldnt eat dinner with us

All because of an argument about mowing the lawn or trimming some plants lel

I didn't know what to get my relatives for Christmas and then I realized that everyone can use a really nice pair of designer socks. I got socks for the whole family all for 50% off at socksoff. Socksoff.com

I threw a cup at a wall during an office meeting. It was because nobody had ordered lunch.

Also, the boss' dog pissed on a cushion.

Once the boss's dog set the standard for bad behavior all bets were off.

I work in China. Nobody here is talented and we all get jobs because we're related to someone who knows someone.

My MIL and SIL got into a brandy mixed with wine fueled argument and SIL threw a vase and it shattered. That was cool to watch

A family member threw ours and everyone's Christmas out of whack by telling a lie about why we couldn't have my mom's family's Christmas (we host, ~25 people, prime rib etc) on Christmas, as we have practically ever year for at least 20 years. We changed it to the 23rd based on this lie, the person never even came, and we found out that the real reason was they wanted to have Christmas at their own house with their immediate family on Christmas at their parents house; my mother had a fever on the 23rd and had to play host through that.

This is not the first time this person/family have tried to pull something like this.

Another trashy family member showed up right as food was served (though she had nothing going on prior), then had to leave almost immediately before coffee or desserts had been gotten out, demanded presents be exchanged early, got everyone rushing around, opened her gift then bounced out immediately.

So instead this year we had what we know as Christmas on the 23rd, the annual Christmas Eve party on the 24th, and then a weird second Christmas on Christmas. Nobody liked it, I missed my gf's family's Christmas, and for that reason we've declared fuck anyone's reasons for wanting it on another day unless you're grandma, and fuck you if you want things rushed or delayed; you make your own choices and you can just not come if you want.

Also some fatass found the paczkis (polish donuts) I made to surprise my old polish grandma who hasn't had them since she moved from Milwaukee 60 years ago and brought them out without asking before either dinner or desserts. I know it was you, Jim.

Ma'am we've been over this before. You need to stop.

I am a bot. Contact for questions

You're uninvited for Christmas too

My 11 year old nephew (older sister’s step-son) and nephew’s bio mom got into a car accident on Christmas Eve. They were t-boned because nephew’s mom fucking fell asleep behind the wheel. They were checked out at the hospital but released within an hour so they’re ok, but my sister really read her the riot act for being a fucking idiot.

Also my mom’s brother and sister haven’t talked to my mom or my grandmother for 2 years now because my grandmother remarried after my grandfather died, and my aunt got butthurt when grandma wouldn’t let her make any decisions regarding the wedding, and kept her out of the loop on some things. Uncle took aunt’s side, and my mom has all but disowned the two of them. Haven’t been any new developments since, but it was quite dramatic back when it happened, and had it not they probably would’ve come out to see us for the holidays.

Some minor recent drama that didn’t seem big enough for a thread:

Patreon, as you know, has been going on a banning spree. Recently, they have decided to take on a new menace: vore hentai artists. AppArently being physically impossible isn’t an exemption from the sexual violence rules. Patreon has taken the incomprehensibly leftist position that unwilling vore specifically is unacceptable, not for the totally rational reason that it’s disgusting but for the hilariously stupid reason that the tiny person didn’t consent to being swallowed whole (even though you can’t actually consent to suicide):

https://aryion.com/forum/viewtopic.php?f=18&t=51568&start=20

http://boards.4chan.org/d/thread/8290280/giantessvore

Anyway Merry Christmas, try to avoid hungry 50-foot tall women because that is totally a thing that exists and is worthy of concern

Those people are so salty, thanks for sharing!

I learned that my sister stopped using body wash because they are full of chemicals.

Also had people explaining to me that we deserved the terrorist for going to the middle east. I had a very good friend killed by the terrorists, so that ended up with us screaming at each others.

My stefather familly had some divorce drama too.

All in all, this was a very calm christmas.

Also had people explaining to me that we deserved the terrorist for going to the middle east.

this is true though

No, people that are barely legal are not responsible for what our country did in the middle east 20 years ago, lmao.

if youre living in a europoor country so impotent you havent even been able to give meaningful material aid to western imperial efforts in the middle east since 1998 you deserve terrorists just for being such obvious cucks

w👁️ke

I would agree if the word deserved as replaced by the word caused.

Almost no one deserves being subjected to the religion of peace.

my parents cat has started jumping on the kitchen counter even though hes not allowed up there. thats literally it

I don't get why people don't want cat on counter

My daughter gave my wife and me the stomach flu last week which I then passed on to my mom then my sister and her kids. We got it from my in-laws and it was going through their side as well so family plans all got cancelled on Christmas Eve and Day.

The in-laws stuff was earlier tonight but I didn't go because it had been downgraded in importance and I don't like being around them for more than a half hour or so. I'm going to my mom's on Saturday but don't expect much drama there.

I have a very tight knit group of friends that I met online.

One of them is an absolute fucking idiot. Like he’s not actually mentally disabled but starting to think he is tbh.

Met this girl at the 6th job he’s had this year (keeps getting fired because he’s a hard ass talking back to supervisors after working there for like 3 weeks) and she was living in a motel and shit.

They start dating, first day they make it Facebook official and say I love you on Facebook.

She gets fired, he just ups and quits. He moves her into his room at his grandparents house. Grandparents are like wtf but they’re nice people so they let it go.

They get in arguments on Facebook like 3 times a week. In between that they share those relationship quote pictures like 20 times a day. My favorite is the posts about them making 💰 money 💰 moves when she works part time at a gas station and he’s still unemployed, living in grandmas basement and blowing her paycheck on Texas Roadhouse and posting pics of their food on FB.

Anyways basically the cringiest shit ever but to make it even better he proposes to this girl. He’s got a wedding ring in layaway too.

To top it all off, this has all happened in the course of 6 weeks.

Friends and I have desperately tried to talk to him and help him out but she’s the love of his life bro just be happy for him for once.

Bonus:

Friends and I find out this chick has a kid. She doesn’t have custody because she hit the kid with something and busted his face open so now the kid is living with the boyfriend she was dating at the time she had the kid (not the BD btw).

Your pulitzer's in the mail

I am a bot. Contact for questions

I would love to see some screenshots of FB drama 😎

I can next week. Out of town and I don’t have my computer. Imgur mobile is aids.

We have a group chat where we tried to dig up some dirt on her, but now we just take screenshots and make fun of how retarded he is so there’s a lot I can share. When I get home I’ll put them together.