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They baffled Buzzfeeds Twitter, didn't even think it possible.

POO

Couldn't wizards go around raping anyone they wanted and vanishing the DNA evidence? Maybe even use illusion magic to disguise themselves as husband or wife? Harry Potter suddenly has my interest 😸

Please stop posting. I don't want to read your sick rape fantasies.

Commitioso rape-us!

Couldn't wizards go around raping anyone they wanted and vanishing the DNA evidence?

No need to even deal with evidence when you can just obliviate their memories of the whole thing. Like can you even imagine how rampant sex crimes must be in the wizarding world?

I mean date rape, interspecies rape (sentient creatures & animals), incest & pedophilia all get casually glossed over in the main books. It just sounds like british culture.

Umbridge recreated what centaurs qre famous for and the main character did nothing. harry potter was gleeful at horses raping someone then again one of the heroes was a goat fucker

plus giants and veela are not human & people are fucking them too. but they were real casual about the goat, werent they

Hahaha this guy is so wacky he fucks goats btw.

What have we borne into this world

Everyday we stray further from god's light smh

oh man but imagine if it did that for a minute and then switched BACK

🤮

It's a world where the main villain was sprung forth through a witch and a dude permanently on magic date rape drugs, how have you never thought of any of this

I don't know anything about Harry Potter shit tbh

I so do not at all remember voldemorts dad being on roofies but a quick google confirms you're much more of a dork than I am.

I only remember it because it stuck out when I first read the last(?) book because it was a pretty edgy thing to add to snakeman's backstory.

It is why he was evil, rowling think date rape babies can not feel love

Wizards rape each other, and muggles all the damn time. The shit they do for fun is horrifying beyond description. Harry Potter is one of the most cheerful dystopias in modern fiction. They sell roofies, cursed shit, and lollipops that burn your tongue out over the counter. House elves are kept as slaves. Teachers can easily get away with literally torturing their students. Most of the old magical families are inbred lunatics who follow a crazy snake man because he promises to let them openly terrorize the normies. Quidditch players are constantly getting murdered in matches. There's an entire section of Diagon Alley dedicated to the highly illegal dark arts. Alan Moore didn't need to make Harry Potter the antichrist to make Hogwarts horrific. All he should have done was reveal what was really there: an entire secretive society of sociopathic magic users with a shocking disregard for all laws and norms of normal human society. They'll rape you, burn out you eyes, rip out your bones, then heal you and make you forget it ever happened.

And they say we don't understand the root causes of violence in Western society.

alan moore? did i miss something

League of extraordinary gentlemen is weird.

i read the first couple volumes, i just thought all those modern era ones were fake after LXG ‘96 disappointed me with its fakeness

The Black Dossier includes the fucking golliwog. Its every bit as awful as you can imagine.

They sell love potions in stores openly, and they aren’t treated like they’re a big deal, even though they’re basically a magic date rape drug.

When Queenie put an enchantment on Newt’s friend to make him want to marry, everyone in the story treated it like she was being a jerk and not like she was using magic to fuck with his mind. Imagine if a villain did that.

A joke shop sells magic rape potion to children

And that's a good thing.

Didn't they have some 100% effective date-rape love drug? Plus some magic where you only need someone's hair to look exactly like them? Between the two, you could fuck literally anybody you like, married or not.

Damn it turns out people in the sun know a lot about Harry Potter 🤔

Everyone was reading Harry Potter ten years ago. The only people who don't remember that were those who hadn't yet learned to read as of ten years ago. Nowadays, there are three different types of people.

There are those who haven't read anything since, and have since forgotten all about Harry, along with everything else, because not reading unironically rots one's brain.

Then, there are those who have kept reading, and realized that there is far better material out there, which I like to believe is most people, the same way I like to believe that doomsday fetishists don't have a point.

And finally, there are those who have spent the preceding ten years reading nothing else. These people are worse off than those who have read nothing since.

Foids can't fanfic as well as a shitposting litterbox.

I mean I can see that tbh

Wizards are cunts summon any shit when ever they need it and give no fucks to the consequences

Can turn anyone into a cat fuck why wouldn’t they be utter shits

https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=bpgQSbwnWD0

This also happens in Star Trek, you never see a toilet, that's because they just beam the filth directly into space from their bladders and bowels.

Ironically, the bathrooms of Hogwarts were places where several key events happened. In addition while boys and girls had separate bathrooms, it seems neither the students nor the teachers ever really cared enough to enforce them.

I’m pretty sure Rowling is the type of girl that’s into piss and scat judging from all of this.

my kind of lady

In addition, while boys and girls had separate bathrooms it seems neither the students nor the teachers ever really cared enough to enforce their gender segregation.

I dont think that is true. The only bathroom we see is one no one actually uses because it is haunted by the worlds most whiny ghost

I’m told they would do the same to win pie-eating contests.

Why couldn't they just get rid of the poop before it hit the air? Wizards sound dumb!

wizards are dumb. They basically learn remedial skills in school using magic for 8 years, and have had at least 3 wizard hitlers despite mind reading, fortune telling, time travel, and truth serum all being invented. one of their wizard hitlers built plumbing in their castle for his pet snake but not bathrooms. tons of them are poor and don't have birth control. Wizards are trailer trash.

Are they really poor when they can just turn useless shit into useful shit?

they are too stupid to do that. they clearly could but they would rather spend their time either being kooky or creepy, depending on if they're good poors or bad poors. I guess you can say it's a "culture" issue...

Are the same gene variants that activate magic powers the same that cause a cognitive disability, like how cats with blue eyes are usually deaf??

snally, I think you may have cracked the case

So they’re gypsies..

Gypsies with magic, god help us all.

Gypsies already think they have magic, they curse people and use crystal balls and shit.

Nah, they just want you to believe in it.

They also have unlimited resources. Like food cant be "created from nothing" but you can increase the quantity and transfigured things in to it (things that can be created from nothing)

READ

ANOTHER

BOOK

tbh im tired of seeing this circlejerk too

wait but it’s

Stolen tweet:

Harry Potter fans: it’d be cool if we had some Harry Potter trivia

JK Rowling: dumbledore is gay

HPF: haha cool

JK: they often have mutual masturbation sessions in the hufflepuff dormitories

HPF: what JK: everyone used to shit themselves

Hufflepuff one sounds fun.

What else did they have to do to fill the time? Gryffindoors were off having adventures, Slytherins were plotting to take over shit, Ravenclaws were studying, what are the puffies gonna do? Sit around and be loyal and shit?

I need the source on the second one pls

It's fake, sadly, but given this shitshow I can see why people believed it

Aww 😭

What the fuck are they talking about?

harry potter great-great-great grandparents pooped all over the place

I was watching Henry Potter last night with my nieces. I haven't seen them films since the last one came out and now that we are viewing everything that happens through the lens of Harland Potter, it is interesting to note that Harley is literally a rich white male who was given massive power as an infant. The protagonist of the Rowling lady's story is a white guy who was given his abilities, money and fame without having done a single thing to earn them.

Harry is a jock that becomes a cop lol

Harold Potter is actually about what magic men do with their street shit

JK Rowling for mod

unworthy

She's too poor. She'll drop the average.

Does the shit cease to exist or does it just become invisible shit?

I assume the first one or else Hogwarts would smell really bad

Everyone who goes there would get used to it after a while. Like Indians do.

Then if the spell broke one day they'd just find themselves and everything else smeared with it.

Literally say anything to stay relevant