He earned it. That as some solid quality drama. The apology post was my favorite part. Such a diverse mix of cryposting, sperg outs, tendie spilling, and seriousposting because the idiots blew their remaining month's worth of NEETbux on this site. Glorious.

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He earned it. That as some solid quality drama. The apology post was my favorite part. Such a diverse mix of cryposting, s*ergouts, tendie spilling, and seriousposting because the idiots blew their remaining month's worth of NEETbux on this site. Glorious.

I tell you what, I work here for years, effortposting, thinking of witty comments, sucking mod dick, and the most I get is an invite whenever the sub goes private. But this immigrant can just come in here and rise to the top? Without going through the hell the rest of us go through? This sub is a swamp, and it needs to be drained. At this rate us native born drama posters will be a minority by 2020. We need to act, now.

You get an invite when the sub goes private and still you complain?

copypasta material

I am mod and I have never made a post

I can only dream to create as much chaos as he has, well deserved

Congratulations 🎉👏🎉👏

You people are disgusting

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Let me tell you this-- /r/Drama is one of the most malevolent, cruel, coldhearted online communities you'll ever find, and even as a supporter of free speech it appalls me that Reddit would allow such a vile, festering hub of bigotry and sadism to exist. You think [slur]town was bad? That subreddit, if you pick up on the dog-whistles (and many don't even bother with that-- say want you want about Stormfront, at least it bans "n[slur]"), will reveal itself to you as Reddit's number one hub for the web's most hardened Nazis, Klansmen, Fascists, and Gamergaters. You'll notice on the sidebar that it encourages members to be as dramatic as possible. That's intentional. They encourage arguments in the comments section. That's intentional. You know the Three Minute Hate (it's from this underrated book 1985, give it a read, it's scary how much it parallels our society)? It's like that, they want to stoke the flames of reactionary rage so they continue to dogpile every progressive and minority who enters the subreddit, normalizing these evil feelings. They brigade from subreddit to subreddit, having an entire cabal of mods spanning hundreds of communities, gaslighting lived experiences of the oppressed and unashamedly bolstering Reddit's homegrown whitе supremacy movement. They've kink-shamed hundreds of people too, some even... to death. I fear that /r/drama may be producing an entire army of Dylann Roofs and Elliot Rogers, and I highly suggest that nobody dares visit that horrible subreddit, lest you potentially fall victim to its corruptive aura

That degree finally paying off

I am a bot. Contact for questions

t.mayôid

that's not very nice sweaty

God save ColeArts, My Hero.

Are you a literal NPC? First you had trouble counting to two, now you're just copy and pasting your replies. Do you need some time to update before you can type anything new?

Snapshots:

1. This Post - archive.org, megalodon.jp, removeddit.com, archive.is

2. https://www.reddit.com/r/teenagers/... - archive.org, megalodon.jp, removeddit.com, archive.is

3. https://www.removeddit.com/r/teenag... - archive.org, megalodon.jp, archive.is

4. https://www.reddit.com/r/teenagers/... - archive.org, megalodon.jp, removeddit.com, archive.is

^{I am a bot. (Info / Contact)}

69 platinum...

I like how people are taking the opportunity to victimize theirself on the apology post. "Uhmmm axetschualllyyy, my mom's best friends cousins uncle died of cancer and i feel personally attacked."

Hot take: maybe they've really lost their close ones to cancer and they're genuinely mad at OP so they expressed their views

Hot take: Stop being an over emotional little bitch. If you were aware of everytime someone on the Internet lied about having cancer, you'd spend the next 15 years rolled up in fetal position crying.

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Shut up r-word

Edit: f-word automod

Please don’t leave us, f-slur

So? Are we obliged to give them reddit gold now? I hope cancer gets all of this fucking website tbh.

Where else in the world are so many retards this well congregated? I mean, reddit is amazing, as long as you find wanting to kill yourself enjoyable

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Literally shaking rnReplyGive AwardsharereportSave

level 2PureGold0715 points · 56 minutes agoI, too, shake when a redditor threatens me.ReplyGive AwardsharereportSave

level 2OG_Mudkipz14 points · 50 minutes ago

​

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cancercels have it coming.

Omg why are you here?

so many people genuinely getting offended LOL i think they just mad they got trolled so successfully and a bunch of b-slurs that now want to play morally righteous

Giving platinum to a terminal patient is almost as useless as giving platinum to bots.

It's kinda fucked up, really.

"Here's some fake internet coins for the next year. The doctor gave you 4 months? Lucky for you, those bad boys roll over"

"you're welcome"

$880+ right now

He's at 78 now. Which means people are still giving him money after he already apologized. Christ people are actually so fucking r-tarded it hurts

Same. I already called off work for this shit. I want to see this fucker burn.

Literally shaking rn

I, too, shake when a redditor threatens me.

Dont threaten me with a good time

Shaking is my factory setting. Just reading any kind of negative energy sends me into a full blown panic attack until I inject 20 kilograms of pure xanax into my arms.

Called off work for what exactly?

call off work

Put on my maternity pants

Rev up my Reddit anger

"yep, it's sperging time"

Boss can I call off work for being sick?

For being sick?

Yeeees.

Actually calls off work for being angry on reddit like a boss

Sperging time

Over the kid pretending to have cancer.

Why the fuck would they call off work for a stranger having cancer?

I have no fucking idea mate but their comment was upvoted

Teenagers are sensitive

"hey boss, I'm not going to be coming in today, some r-slur lied on the Internet and i feel personally attacked."

"No, you don't even understand, ok. He posts on a right-wing subreddit"

In order to receive no monetary compensation.

This is satire, right? No one is weak enough to call in sick over some random person on the internets cancer?

It's okay, it's just a job helping his mom run a jeans booth at the swap meet.

I like their selection of yarn dreamcatchers and southwestern costume jewelry.

And lovely teal, and/or light blue colored rocks on a string that you stick in your ass for your uncle's dontelurmum Indian ceremony every summer

🔝🔝🔝

have you not seen how many people are brought to tears by pictures, moments in games, or someones "wholesome post" on reddit lately, It's the new trend. Show your emotional side, it's good for Karma!

​

This was so eye opening it brought a tear to my eye.

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Damn the mods sure to take April fools jokes pretty serious don't they.

It's definitely a brain tumor.

only if you then share a tearful and completely diversionary story about how your self-diagnosed social anxiety and depression makes this more meaningful for you

Wow that sucks to hear fam. Sending all the updoots and good vibes your way 🙏🙏🙏

You're such a great person! I'm driving over to your house right now to jerk you off.

Is it ok if I call you fam while you do it? Just my way of spreading the love 🤗🤗🤗

My drama-cock is pulsating with potential bukkake

if you ever need to talk PM me, but actually don’t because that would be annoying

I’m brought to tears by the Minecraft soundtrack does that count?

😒

Alexa, play Sea Shanty 2.

God the Stoic generation can’t come quick enough

You see idiots like in mass shooting threads saying how horrible they feel and they feel deeply connection despite being hundreds of miles away and making it about themselves instead of the victims

One of them walked about having to take of word despite being no where near the place

This comment made me call off work

You a teacher at Columbine or something?

Or "omg guys I'm feeling sick in my stomach from this tragedy happening" really? You feel physical discomfort over someone getting shot for the billionth time in history?

Faking empathy is very trendy

It's been happening for a long ass time though, it may even just be a human trait. Every time somebody in a community dies there's a huge group of people talking about it and trying to find a connection with the victim regardless of whether or not one was actually there.

Yeah, I see your point. A lot of people like to involve themselves in tragedy to gain sympathy from others. Some people feign grief so as to not look like a bad person. I saw this many times at school. Whenever a kid would kill themselves, suddenly everyone would pretend like they were their best friend, even though the kid was a quiet loner nobody really liked, nobody wants to be accused of not caring. Some of the bullies were the ones who performatively grieved the loudest, maybe because they didn't want a finger pointed at them, and maybe because they did really feel bad for aiding in pushing a kid to suicide.

Also, humans love feeling like part of a larger group, and tragedy is an easy way to come together with others to commiserate. I don't know the answer. I just know that I don't feel the same amount of empathy that others appear to feel when something bad happens to a stranger. I also don't feel the need to pretend I feel bad about bad things that happen to strangers. Maybe there's something wrong with me, but I doubt it. I'm pretty much perfect.

https://youtu.be/WFxOxU9qQyQ

tl;dr? Dropped it after seeing a guy with a beard holding a sword

Watch it g-slur

Evo psych layman

🤢🤢🤢🤮🤮🤮🤮

imagine becoming a hobby enthusiast of one of the least scientific life sciences, you may as well become a jung-thumping spirtualist

There are a lot of women with emotional problems out there.

Men, too.

Caring is degenerate agreed

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Dude just look at those people who cry and hold vigils for people that they've never met half way across the world. I honestly always assumed they were faking it, but it seems to be such a widespread phenomena that I don't know what to think anymore.

It seems to just be part of the human condition. Cultures across the world sending America and the victims' families random shit after 9/11, everyone rooting for those kids trapped in a cave and Chilean miners, randos across the world getting emotional over unsolved murder cases, I guess a lot of people can't turn off their empathy when something bad happens

You are so insensitive. HOW DARE YOU invalidate these people's emotional connections. I like can't even breathe right now I'm so enraged at you for this.

Every year around E3 time on r/gaming there's dozens of comments from people who take the day off just to watch the online broadcast live. Never underestimate the stupid shit that people will shrug off work for

G*m*rs should be sterilized but to be fair work does suck.

The sybys over at hiphopheads were crying over a dead of an unpopular rapper recently

crying over a dead of an unpopular rapper

They must be crying almost all the time then.

you see how much these faggots are worked up because they got (successfully) trolled? They should, idk, maybe see it as a sign they shouldn't take shit they see on this site so seriously and not guild some sob story? Half the shit on the front page probably fake as shit anyway

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you see how much these f-slurs are worked up because they got (successfully) trolled? They should, idk, maybe see it as a sign they shouldn't take shit they see on this site so seriously and not guild some sob story? Half the shit on the front page probably fake as shit anyway

*forgot how g-slur reddit is copied comment

Jesus christ some people need to get a fucking grip.

Welcome to reddit where mentally ill people congregate instead of trying to get help

Actually they encourage each other to get help for their depression which they have because of relatable me irl memes

Ikr. I can't believe how many naive and gullible people look at an obvious joke and get so angry because they can't tell it's a joke. The guy even says literally one reply below his comment that he was joking.

You were talking about all the idiots here taking that comment seriously... right?

SRD-ins are also shaking rn

anyone retarded enough to spend money on a reddit post deserves to be scammed

lmfao

Tfw you're 15 years old and you cry to mommy to get her credit card to gild your fake dying Internet friend's post.

What an incredible time to be alive

Now if we could just fuck those teenagers

Am i right ha ha just k i d d i n g

^{the state of florida insists I inform you of my registered sex offender status}

Hows your sex offender shuffle?

Terrible, I don’t have any rhythm.

Maybe I can teach you ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

That’s what they said in the prison showers. :(

Bite the pillow Phillip, I'm going in dry!

Easy there Biden...

That implies anyone on /r/teenagers is a teenager. It's a bunch of grown men pretending to be teens.

Is it any better that a bunch of basement-dwelling grown men cried to mommy to get her credit card to gild their fake dying Internet friend's post?

Not really. Sadder I think.

You know, banning people who gild could fix a thing or two.

mods plz

The radical centrist approach is to ban gilders and poorf*gs who complain about gilding

Hey, not all of us are poor, some of us just hate reddit and the morons who pay money to it to give some stranger a gold star.

poorcel seething that the patricians have disposable income which they can piss away on r*tarded shit

C O P E

Imagine spending your disposable income on fucking reddit and then bragging about it. Damn, that's sad.

S E E T H E

Just ban everyone. Ban reddit

Nah. That 'igiveassholesgold' guy was doing a good thing. I haven't seen anyone gilded by him in a while though.

The worst part is ever since they introduced this bullshit tiered gold system, we can't even ironically give people silver now that silver is a "real" thing.

Whats reddit silver? Does that cost idiots money as well?

Yes

Of you get gold you can give someone silver for free.

not necessarily

if you get gilded you get enough for a silver to give someone

I wish people would stop giving me Silver its worthless

Ok

You have to say or do something worth gold or platinum.

Nice try

Le epic gild post calling gold stupid never been done before in the history of r*ddit

The radical centrist approach is to ban gilders and poorf*gs who complain about gilding

You got scammed

So how much was spent on this post

almost $900

Seriously?

Can you redditcels stop giving this dumpster fire of a site money just because someone said something that made you say “This, so much this!”

No u

He's like the Reddit equivalent of Bernie Madoff.

Obviously no teenagers actually go on that sub so is it just for pedos or losers trying to fit in or something?

r/teenagers isn't a cesspool for pedos but most people there are losers trying to fit in, which is why they're on Reddit instead of actually socializing with people irl.

mirror? do you own one?

Ofc I do. Gotta be aware of how much of a loser I am.

Ackshually, the correct term would be ephebophilia.

Based and morning-afterpilled

it does have teenagers for sure cuz that sub is soo fucking cancer had to unsub. -not trying to be edgy but people on that subreddit are fucking brainless losers

Actual ret@rds are those who gilded him.

It's pretty funny to imagine irl.

You're laying on your deathbed. You've been fighting terminal cancer for the last 8 months, but you have lost the battle. You only have a couple days left to live. All of the sudden, a couple creepy old men, accompanied by some actual teenagers come into the room. "Hey bud, i know you have less than a week to live, but me and the fellas pitched in to buy you something." He hands you a card with a gold star on it. "Here bud, ad free all access to reddit for the next 90 months." They leave the room, and you die alone two hours later.

Imagine how fucked morbid it would be even without the irl part

 

You find out you have 4 months to live. You make a post talking about it, thanking people, whatever the fuck. Tons of people with nothing better to spend their cash on buy a shitload of reddit medals

 

Later that night you look at your account, and you see you’ve got like 4 years of ad free reddit, the majority of which you won’t be able to use since you’ll be dead

At least some neckbeards will feel good about themselves for a moment, before going back to REEEing on /r/all about some dumb shit.

Yep. Your post loses traction after a day because content is constantly being cycled out. After all the 100's of empty comments sympathizing with you, and your inbox stops getting new messages, you're left with one thing; reddit gold. A week goes by, you die, and all those "sympathetic people" don't even remember your post, let alone acknowledge you're dead.

Hopefully not alone. Maybe somebody will offer you a last cigarette.

What's worse? A bunch of teens taking mommy's credit card to give someone fake Internet medals, or, a bunch of grown men roleplaying as teens and giving a bunch of fake Internet medals.

definitely the grown men

I don't think teenagers would pay for gold it's probably people from r/all

most of them dont have the money

As a member of that sub u are right

Eww zoomers get out 🤢🤢

Zoomers, Millennials, Xoomers, Boomers, and grandpas all need to leave the fucking sub

Golden Generation and older only, please

Not understanding that the majority of reddit is zoomers

Sorry old man

fuck off and do your fortnite dances you little worm

Eight years on reddit and you still don’t realize you’ve never spoken to another adult on this website.

Smh

z**mers tend to stay segregated in the absolute shittiest subs on reddit and stick out like a sore thumb when they do crawl into other subs so it's not particularly difficult to avoid them

If you don’t think the banning of million zoomer extreme injected this sub with twelve year olds...

The father of your future demon spawn moderates Zoomer central, /r/4chan

Wtf is a zoomer

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😡

Zoophiliac g*mers

Atleast their hearts were in the right place 😔

This is why everyone under the age of 23 should be illegal

So we throw kids in jail until they’re in their mid 20s? Works for me.

If we catch them we can be lenient but the streets should be clear of these sorts of "people"

can the punishment be death because please just come fucking end me now

It can but we don't do that here

People get real wild about it

It's so so easy to fake things here on reddit.

What is a reddit coin? I don’t keep up with this stuff.

People actually paying real money to... like a post more? It's fucking stupid.

Gilds are basically super upvotes. If something is gilded more, well it must be right!

They fragmented gold into smaller units to get those sweet microtransaction bux

It's Reddit's new thing. Rather just than "Gold", there's silver, gold and platinum.

It used to go to "paying for servers", but they've dropped that and it goes into their pockets, as it always did.

How much do they cost?

Lol money for “server upkeep” reddit is owned by Condé Nast. It’s not some server in a basement a dude in New Jersey owns lol.

I knew it.

Hey guys, I too have cancer. Upvotes to the left, gild button ↓ here somewhere.

Well you got 85 months of Reddit premium and $888.336 worth medals

Redditshutdown.exe

That sub should be quarantined.

Based and lumbago pilled

Hey check it out - Shittymorph himself replied to the kid:

Hey man, a couple other people tagged me in your post. I am not often at a loss for words but I don't really know what to say here. I wanted to let you know that I am thinking about you, pulling for you, and will be praying for you. I have a few hoodies left over from my last contest - and if you would like one I would be happy to put one in the mail for you. Just PM me your address. I have a son who is a teenager and this post breaks my heart. Thinking of you buddy. Also wanted to acknowledge your awesome use of the meme... Take care.

I fucking LOVED that post. I think it was fantastic and everyone who is angry deserves to be flicked in the side of the head. He says he has cancer and goes on to say it's something called LUMBAGO. I've never heard of that in my life. I have a spinal disease so ya kinda learn some of the lingo associated with that stuff. You I googled it and it's a fucking meme. How did that many people spend real money on fake internet awards for a fake disease?

Anyone that's mad is missing out on an important lesson. You can be mad that you got scammed for a minute but then you need to realize you gotta smarten up before your gullibility costs you more than just a couple bucks.

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Lumbago is in fact a real word in the medical field. The use of that word in RDR2 turned it into a meme. It's just another fancy word for minor lower back pain tho, nothing cancer related. So your point still stands...

My doctor complained once about how all her medical records got put into another database and she looked in there and all her patients with back pain were marked as having "lumbago". Not that she didn't get what it meant, but it was really annoying to get timewarped into the 19th century.

the post literally ended with a joke, a shittymorph and people fucking fell for it?? I read it and knew immediately it was a joke people are fkin r-slurs

Even shittymorph himself fell for it. :'(

HE EVEN PUT A FUCKING MEME IN IT

LEGEND

Reddit is constant proof that the old saying, "There's a sucker born every minute." is the gospel truth.

They pulled a Smullet

He had reddit coins to last him till he dies. Well would have at least.

I have no sympathy for losers who spend real money on this shit.

Why didn't they donate to a cancer charity instead of giving him a bunch of fake medals?

That is the most teenage thing I’ve seen anyone do in r/teenagers.

Kid did good, I hope reddit doesnt refunds the tards

All those internet medals took the cancer away good job reddit

Why did people gild him that much? All he would’ve needed is was 4-5 months worth of gold.

I just got the news, my cancer is terminal..

submitted 1 days

In 2015 I got diagnosed with terminal brain cancer.

reddit always makes me feel good about not being the biggest r-slur on the shortbus

Top comment - "first time I've wanted a post to be fake"

Well it's your lucky day, friend.

Lmao I realized I made that mistake when formatting

The people talking about getting refunds are obviously r-slurs. 100% of the money went to Reddit. There is a zero percent chance of a refund.

Seriously hahaha. When you are dumb enough to buy coins in the first place you dont deserve to get your money back

Fake cancer story -> showered in Reddit dosh Fake apology -> showered in Reddit dosh

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First of all anyone who buys medals for reddit posts is an absolute fucking moron. Second, did no one read the post and see the undertaker meme at the end? Bunch of idiots.

I thought the Undertaker bit was just his trying to make light of a shitty situation.

​

Glad to find out it was just all bullshit.

​

I mean, fuck OP, but I'm glad he's okay, at least.

​

​

I read that post earlier, assumed it was a joke from the shittymorph joke at the end, but then everyone was taking it seriously in the comments

It was terminal lumbago at some point. That was all over the comments too, don't know how anyone managed to read the comments and go "Huh. Better give this kid(reddit) some gold. Very legit"

I honestly dont get why people are always so serious about these kind of post. Personally I dont give a shit if some random guy on the internet has cancer, and I dont feel the need to express my sorrow for them through reddit. Its amazing how many people do. But the same people laugh about facebooks 'thoughts and prayers'...

Yo wtf how did people believe he was even being serious tho in the first place? I knew immediately when the shittymorph at the end it was a joke, and then got confused why everyone was taking this seriously. Was the shittymorph there the whole time or is that an edit? honestly confused how any retard took that seriously, nevermind give it fucking reddit plat/gold too

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Yo wtf how did people believe he was even being serious tho in the first place? I knew immediately when the shittymorph at the end it was a joke, and then got confused why everyone was taking this seriously. Was the shittymorph there the whole time or is that an edit? honestly confused how any r-slurred took that seriously, nevermind give it fucking reddit plat/gold too

​

I love this sub

Remember that time they gilded a post of a girl saying that the sub was turning into an uncle haven with no evidence. Then she literally made no posts ever again.

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Gib link please, sounds pretty bad.

https://www.reddit.com/r/teenagers/comments/amhkb9/attention_all_teenagers_this_sub_is_an_early/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=ios_app

>Believing a sob story online, with no proof and ends with the hell in a cell bit.

Imagine being this r-slurred.

The fucking state of that sub

Jesus that comments:votes ratio of his apology post, I've never seen a thread like that on reddit

Can we canonise Cole as a drama saint please? This man is a inspiration to us all.

Uh, what?

You caused a significant amount of drama, and imo - did literally nothing wrong. Sure, joke could have presented better/made more obvious, but at that point its spoonfeeding. Everyone whose gilded you deserved to lose that money, and everyone hating on you is straight up r-slured. I wish you the best of luck, mah dude

u/ColeArts

welcome to the mod team!

Really fucking stupid thing to do, but hopefully he's young enough to learn from this mistake (implying he's actually a teenager)

God-tier shitpost