Welcome back, unapprovedcels.

246  2019-04-15 by le_epic_xd_part_2

54 comments

In The Lord of the Rings, J. R. R. Tolkien drew upon the language and themes found in the old Medieval hero-tales in order to construct a kind of new mythology. The brilliance of Tolkien was in his departure from the Pagan modes of conduct and morality of these old tales, his creation of a syncretistic fusion between Christian thought and Pagan language, and so his work achieved a deep resonance with all who read it.

We find this passage at the conclusion of The Return of the King:

The Dark Lord was suddenly aware of him, and his Eye piercing all shadows looked across the plain to the door that he had made; and the magnitude of his own folly was revealed to him in a blinding flash, and all the devices of his enemies were at last laid bare.

Adversaries in the stories that Tolkien drew upon, Grendel, Mordred and the like, often served as obstacles that the heroes could overcome through feats of strength and cunning. Sauron is not like them. When Sauron is defeated, it is not because Aragorn is stronger than him or because Gandalf is wiser. They are not. It is only that his hubris was so great that it never occured to him that anyone would want to destroy the thing he held so dear. It is not until the final few seconds of his existence that he realises his mistake.

I think that I Am Jazz displays a similar moment. In the pictured scene, Jazz's journey to what he believes is womanhood is almost complete. He is resting after surgery, a triumphant smile on his face, his rotting groin held together by a labyrinthine patchwork of stitches and grafts. But as Eru Ilúvatar nudged Gollum over the Crack of Doom into the fires beneath, so too does the God of our world intervene in this.

Pop!

In a second, the follies of men are undone and Jazz's crotch explodes, a meaty froth of blood and pus pouring out of the hole where his penis used to be.

In that moment of blind panic and terror, Jazz is Sauron. All triumph and victory is gone. Only the Void remains.

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This is pretty lame.

Glad to be back, ready to resume my totally not pathetic practice of laughing at other people's lives to feel better about my own.

This, but unironically.

Absolutely perfect glimmer welcome back pack for the not yet approved. :)

I’ve been banned twice why am I not approved

The secret to the approved list; bussy sometimes with Gussy. You need to target u/snallygaster and wear something fluffy. Don’t mess this part up. Good luck. Be warned! Not many survived.

HAHAHA WOW ITS A PLATYPUS! get IT? It’s so FUCKING random hahaha dude ANIMALS on REDDIT! Sign me up, I also love CATS and DOGGOS! What a cool website! Look forward to more animal posts!

Dude, gimmickposting, lmao

what are u tryin to say? quit pussy footin n just say it.

Platyposting is on a high plane of existence than le ebic reddit doggoposting

Eww you actually unironically like metal core

I actually don’t like metalcore that much. There’s a few albums I genuinely like, but metalcore is nostalgic for me because it reminds me of when I was 14/15.

Oh, What I would give to be a young, trendy, scene kid again 😩

To be fair, you have to have a very high IQ to understand platypupposting.

not understanding the nuances of platyposting and its relation to radical centrism

I thought it was over for me.

Where’s the poison kept?

What’s worse? Being an approvedcel or blue checkmark?

Janitors trying to suck up to and being ignored by morons is worse.

why is it sparkling??

Approvedcels are basically blue checks

Copè

Mr big shot being approved on subreddits

that's an ugly doggo

/u/LightUmbra

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This is a really long way of saying you don't fuck.

I am a bot. Contact for questions

Good boy

S E N T E N I E N T

🐔🐔🐔C🐔L🐔U🐔C🐔K🐔E🐔D🐔🐔🐔

PS: you need more emojis, fam. 🐣💖

😡 is the only emoji you deserve.

Also aren't you a frenchie?

I said quantity not variety. Education fail, smh.

Also aren't you a frenchie?

no

I was close to the 10000 limit.

LMAO your big church building burned.

I was close to the 10000 limit.

The reply button was made to solve this, pal.

LMAO your big church building burned.

It doesn't matter as long your bussy remains hot.

My bussy remains at 98.6 freedom temps.

gay af

UUUU

You were put down, in the future please refrain from discussing subjects you have no education in.

zoz

zle

zozzle

🤗

🤗

🤗

Thanks nigga, I'll be sure to do my part to make every thread I visit worse off than it was prior. Also who has the chapo pasta about closing the sub?

I needed my fix. It's good to be back.

My bussy twinged when I took a look at my now pathetic r/all and saw a glorious drama post. I was banned for telling the mods I was a bitch who didn't deserve to be here but I still wanna be here. For whatever reason you guys let us pathetic nobodies back in, thank you.

Thanks, I feels good to know that even a bunch of losers didnt want me

I feel blessed

Great, and here I was being fucking productive at work for a change.

What is that and why do i want it in my butt?

That's Platy's raw sexual energy

Thx fren

Yikes. You are still doing this

Who’s dick do I gotta suck to get approved?