Buy Bitcoin.

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I don't give a fuck how much you call your flimsy delusions "enlightenment." There is no amount of ceaseless self-deception that will make you accept the charred hellscape of being a miserable useless destitute fucking junkie piece of shit. You know what you are, and it is deeply ugly on every level.

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That's not a job I'd want. Imagine being paid public sector rates essentially to be Elon Musk's lawyer.

can i get approved status jewlord 🧐

Can't wait for tweets like:

Made 50,000 furnaces in minecraft last month, beating all predictions

Thinking about making my server private, cost of getting on white list will be $420

The sole good thing about Twitter is the ability of rich assholes to publish every fart they think smells good

Bad news for investors and in some cases entire nations (thanks daddy 😭), but still endlessly entertaining

Admit it, you want to be a legal mind and word smith but you fell down to Earth with us

This is exactly the sort of thing that being a "hotshot corporate lawyer" entails. Probably 2/3rds of the job is babysitting/handholding rich narcissists and trying to keep them from fucking themselves over by opening their arrogant mouths at inopportune times.

On the plus side, you get to spend a lot of time feeling superior to your clients.

The joke is lawyers always feel superior

Considering how mind-numbingly boring corporate law and securities law tends to be, keeping Elon from memeing himself into jail might be a welcome challenge.