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You probably don't get bussy because you're the type of guy who fucking nails his dick to a board

Snapshots:

1. Infertile man copes hard when his w... - archive.org, archive.today, removeddit.com

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IRL version of hank (narrow urethra), peggy, and bobby hill, who is secretly bill dauterive's kid

Wtf I can’t unsee it.

That's why Bill spends so much time spying through Hank's window, looking at Bobby and Peggy and the life he could've had.

and hank naively sees the john redcorn/dale gribble/joseph gribble as some unfortunate thing that happened to his pathetic, conspiratard friend

which is a projection of the fact that it actually happened to him

I see all the signs, and Bobby is basically Bill without the total lack of self-worth. He’s funny and has good social IQ. The only thing though is that they made him look like Cotton.

Unless...Bill is also Cotton’s illegitimate son. That could work.

God damnit you've ruined it for me.

That's why Bill passes his secret family sauce recipe to him.

I refuse to believe it's true cause Bobby looks really similar to Cotton.

I agree with this. I feel so bad for OP's wife. Look at all the reassuring him and carefully on-eggshells explaining everything to him she's having to do all the time during this.. when she's pregnant and should be able to be happy, instead she has to be stressed and taking care of her husband instead of herself. I hope he gets therapy so he never treats her like this again.

Pizza, no!!

That whole post was some grade A gaslighting. She spins this whole thing as his insecurities getting to him when he's suspicious that he might not be the father when he's told he's infertile.

whole thing as his insecurities getting to him when he's suspicious that he might not be the father when he's told he's infertile

You think this man doesn't have insecurities? It's probably 50/50. He has some insecurities, but he also has every reason to be upset and curious.

In the sense that everyone has them? Sure. But nothing he has said could lead you to believe he should go to counseling.

You have to read another insane wall of text, but in his last post he talks about how he confronts her about it and she talks it down (initially bringing up the ex-girlfriend saying she's not her). Then proceeds to take $1,700 out of their joint checking account for a doctor "payment plan" without telling him and then schedules an appointment without him after saying they would go together.

Literally get a dna test so its at least confirmed to be his and just believe her

That's what they're doing AFAIK

I've seen enough "You're not the father" compilations on youtube to know that foids can willingly fool themselves into believing falsehoods based on miniscule chances, they all act extremely confident then their world comes crashing down

He said that she did offer to get a paternity test right away, so there's a chance that it really is one of those 0.00000001% babies.

I'd stay suspicious if that were my foid, but I wouldn't be burying her under the house until that results of that test came in.

I would expect a very convenient excuse as to why they can't get it tested until after the birth.

A lot of states give you the option to get a DNA test before you sign a birth certificate.

The father is probably a close enough relative that she thinks the test will show him as the dad

Yeah this thread ain't thinking it through. You trust her, you say you believe her, but you get the test done anyway, and that way if the baby comes back as yours you haven't thrown your wife away for nothing.

And if the baby isn't yours? Lmao just get out of there. Who cares you spent a few months loving a cheater? You can move on now.

She's only saying that to buy herself time and calm him down. She'll take the defense at birth "you don't trust me after all the therapy we did? '

Cheaters should die, but realistically, wouldnt you get the same reaction if she has been 100% faithful? In fact, wouldnt it possibly be more offensive?

As soon as the baby is born mr insecurity is doing a secret paternity test. He doesn’t trust his wife period.

She agreed to a paternity test actually. The NIPP seems to be a non invasive prenatal paternity test. Which is the one thing that throws me personally for a loop.

I mean either the guy should start playing the lottery as he got lucky or he's getting a divorce.

Prenatal paternity test can cause a miscarriage. If the woman has agreed to this, he’s the daddy.

They can do one now with just the mothers blood, no risk of miscarriage

Didn’t know that. Just looked it up.

I'm sorry but you can't post here if you don't have an MD.

:(

Melanin deficiency?

that doesnt mean anything

Ok, she was out fucking around because the husband is a non swimmer, got a live one cooking but agreed to a dna test because she likes a gamble and has a feeling the odds or gods are on her side. Hope they get three cherries in a row. 🍒🍒🍒

she was testing him because he knows the test is potentially deadly. She was betting that he wouldn't go through with it on the off chance that the child is actually his.

They're getting a Non-Invasive Prenatal Paternity Test. It only requires a blood draw from the mother and father. No risk of fetal death from that.

Shout outs to the janny taking over the thread with his stickied mod post

Infertile people having children isn't unheard of

but this dude got cucked hard lol

To be fair she did agree to get a paternity test right away, might be one of those one in a million baby's after all. Husband should still be suspicious though.

I'll admit I skimmed the post but did he get the paternity results? I never saw that in the his post saying he was confirmed to be the dad

She also immediately moved money out of their joint account to her private account

based foid prepares itself for deadbeat dad

The test costs nearly 2000 dollars, might be a coincidence but I do acknowledge that it might sound fishy.

But also tells him to call the medical agency thingy to confirm it's for tests if he wants to so idk.

9/10 chance its creative writing anyway

a given for any /r/relationships-style thread which gets posted to this sub tbqh

Which is why I go ahead and assume they are all false and homosexual

9/10 chance its creative writing anyway

He says he's infertile without surgery, what kind of condition makes you infertile but is fixable by surgery? He says he has azoospermia, but that means he's shooting blanks, how is that fixed by surgery?

Narrow urethra

How do you fix that with surgery?

I would guess you make it wider ?

plot twist: identical twin not mentioned, wife convinced him "DNA is all the same" and now he's in full cope mode.