I like to think that everyone shitty on the Left is just a troll account created and maintained by Barron Trump, attempting to use his mammoth brain to make centrists vote Daddy 2020. Because if these people actually exist, and have these strange opinions that so many people supposedly might have, then I'll have to actually vote for Daddy, given he's the option most likely to put these fucking people in camps.
But I'm wise to you, Barron: you'll never actually make me vote.
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CHESTERFIELD COUNTY, Va. (WRIC) — A Chesterfield family spoke with 8News Friday after fending off a naked intruder who broke into their home on South Twilight Lane the night before. The intruder claimed to be the devil and attacked the family, prompting the homeowner to fire 39 rounds.
The incident was a traumatic experience for the Lewis family’s first night in their brand new home.
“She was in to kill us,” Melissa Lewis said. “That was her almighty, to kill us. She attacked us and I held her down just kept on punching her and punching her as hard as I possibly could.”
The Lewis’ dream home now looks like a war zone, with blood soaked into the carpet, the walls and windows riddled with bullets and shell casings scattered all over.
“I said ‘who are you?” Lewis’ husband, who did not wish to go on camera, explained. “She said ‘I need your help, please help me.’ I said ‘get out of my house,’ and she goes ‘I’m the devil.'”
The homeowner says the woman, who had a blue ponytail, broke into the basement around 10:30 p.m. on July 4. The family said she was laughing menacingly and refused to leave.
“She looked possessed, her eyes were completely black, like saucers, and she was laughing like it was a joke,” Lewis’s husband told 8News.
Fearing for his life, the father of three grabbed his pistol and gave a verbal warning to the woman. With his family sleeping upstairs, he opened fire hoping to scare her off. None of the shots struck the suspect.
Lewis said the woman aggressively charged at him with superhuman strength.
“She was not stopping,” he said. “She had the strength of four grown men.”
When he ran out of bullets, Lewis began throwing furniture at her. His wife and children eventually jumped in and attempted to stop the woman. The intruder didn’t stop until one of the children, the Lewis’ 12-year-old son Logan, shoved a wrench into her neck.
Police arrested the intruder and she is being treated and evaluated at the hospital. The Lewis family left with bruises and bite marks.
“I’m scared to go in there, I won’t even go into any room by myself, I’m terrified,” M. Lewis said.
Detectives told the family that the suspect lives nearby and will eventually be charged robbery, breaking and entering and attempted murder. She is currently in the ICU with severe head trauma.
What the fuck do you have all these fucking guns for if you can't even shoot straight you dumbass redneck? Go sit in the corner Cletus. The 12 year old is the man of the house now.
Fucking gun grabbers. Now I can't even get my anti-ectoplasm bullets anymore. I've been sitting around carving crosses onto my shit with a bowie knife! If there isn't a "defend yourself against the devil" subclause in the second amendment there sure as hell should be.
This is why we need full auto ARs with extended mags. You expect me to fire off the 39 rounds required to subdue the average fentanyl American with some tiny pea shooter.
Why the average homeowner doesn't go for a shotgun with as little choke as possible is beyond me, and as an added bonus it has less stopping power to accidently shoot you kids through a wall.
How do you fire warning shots inside your home with your family sleeping upstairs? Where do you aim them? The guy sniffed too much asbestos from the walls.
I paid like $3 for Saint's Row: Gat out of Hell in this sale and I didn't even get the tactile experience of punching Satan in the face. These people should be thankful for how lucky they were.
39 comments
1 BussyShillBot 2019-07-09
Ｅａｔ ｓｈｉｔ
Outlines:
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1 MightiestPhallus 2019-07-09
Based
1 SnapshillBot 2019-07-09
I like to think that everyone shitty on the Left is just a troll account created and maintained by Barron Trump, attempting to use his mammoth brain to make centrists vote Daddy 2020. Because if these people actually exist, and have these strange opinions that so many people supposedly might have, then I'll have to actually vote for Daddy, given he's the option most likely to put these fucking people in camps.
But I'm wise to you, Barron: you'll never actually make me vote.
Snapshots:
I am just a simple bot, *not** a moderator of this subreddit* | bot subreddit | contact the maintainers
1 McFluff_TheCrimeCat 2019-07-09
I can see the breaking and entering obviously but doesn’t sound like she robbed or attempted to murder anyone.
1 Cdace 2019-07-09
She stole their damn wrench with her neck
1 Chapocel 2019-07-09
She was attempting to possess their souls. But sure, NBD.
1 Matues49 2019-07-09
mfw
1 McFluff_TheCrimeCat 2019-07-09
CHESTERFIELD COUNTY, Va. (WRIC) — A Chesterfield family spoke with 8News Friday after fending off a naked intruder who broke into their home on South Twilight Lane the night before. The intruder claimed to be the devil and attacked the family, prompting the homeowner to fire 39 rounds.
The incident was a traumatic experience for the Lewis family’s first night in their brand new home.
“She was in to kill us,” Melissa Lewis said. “That was her almighty, to kill us. She attacked us and I held her down just kept on punching her and punching her as hard as I possibly could.”
The Lewis’ dream home now looks like a war zone, with blood soaked into the carpet, the walls and windows riddled with bullets and shell casings scattered all over.
“I said ‘who are you?” Lewis’ husband, who did not wish to go on camera, explained. “She said ‘I need your help, please help me.’ I said ‘get out of my house,’ and she goes ‘I’m the devil.'”
The homeowner says the woman, who had a blue ponytail, broke into the basement around 10:30 p.m. on July 4. The family said she was laughing menacingly and refused to leave.
“She looked possessed, her eyes were completely black, like saucers, and she was laughing like it was a joke,” Lewis’s husband told 8News.
Fearing for his life, the father of three grabbed his pistol and gave a verbal warning to the woman. With his family sleeping upstairs, he opened fire hoping to scare her off. None of the shots struck the suspect.
Lewis said the woman aggressively charged at him with superhuman strength.
“She was not stopping,” he said. “She had the strength of four grown men.”
When he ran out of bullets, Lewis began throwing furniture at her. His wife and children eventually jumped in and attempted to stop the woman. The intruder didn’t stop until one of the children, the Lewis’ 12-year-old son Logan, shoved a wrench into her neck.
Police arrested the intruder and she is being treated and evaluated at the hospital. The Lewis family left with bruises and bite marks.
“I’m scared to go in there, I won’t even go into any room by myself, I’m terrified,” M. Lewis said.
Detectives told the family that the suspect lives nearby and will eventually be charged robbery, breaking and entering and attempted murder. She is currently in the ICU with severe head trauma.
1 LongPostBot 2019-07-09
I don't have enough spoons to read this shit
I am a bot. Contact for questions
1 Matues49 2019-07-09
Based and copypasta-ed 😎👍
1 TrumpsUsedBussy 2019-07-09
Russia isn't even Europe, why the fuck am I barred away from viewing? Fuck you eurofags.
1 YHofSuburbia 2019-07-09
Maybe you can use some of those Putin shillbux to pay for a VPN?
1 TrumpsUsedBussy 2019-07-09
Are you seriously expecting that old sack of shit to pay up? I'm not.
1 Wild_Hunt 2019-07-09
Novochok then vlad
1 jaredschaffer27 2019-07-09
Have you considered living in an actual country?
1 Karmawasntforsuckers 2019-07-09
This is peak christuckery. Some junkie woman gets into the basement and these people are just absolutley useless.
For fun, lets guess how many Trump facebook groups this family a part of. I'm guessing no fewer than 27.
1 DrunkenRecidivist 2019-07-09
What the fuck do you have all these fucking guns for if you can't even shoot straight you dumbass redneck? Go sit in the corner Cletus. The 12 year old is the man of the house now.
1 Ted_UtteredBoast 2019-07-09
Umm excuse me sweaty how are you supposed to hit a phaseshifting devil w/ regular bullets
1 DrunkenRecidivist 2019-07-09
Fucking gun grabbers. Now I can't even get my anti-ectoplasm bullets anymore. I've been sitting around carving crosses onto my shit with a bowie knife! If there isn't a "defend yourself against the devil" subclause in the second amendment there sure as hell should be.
1 RichEvansSexbot 2019-07-09
Bullets blessed by holy water from the local church. If these inbreds weren't lapsed they wouldn't have been in this situation
1 epicbaconResurection 2019-07-09
This is why we need full auto ARs with extended mags. You expect me to fire off the 39 rounds required to subdue the average fentanyl American with some tiny pea shooter.
1 lolcows63 2019-07-09
They claim it was warning shots lol,
Why the average homeowner doesn't go for a shotgun with as little choke as possible is beyond me, and as an added bonus it has less stopping power to accidently shoot you kids through a wall.
1 Clean_lt_Up_Jannie 2019-07-09
Because if you can't hit something with whatever they used then a shotgun is going to make it way harder.
1 TrumpsUsedBussy 2019-07-09
How do you fire warning shots inside your home with your family sleeping upstairs? Where do you aim them? The guy sniffed too much asbestos from the walls.
1 Day_of_the_COPE 2019-07-09
Ah yes the old 39 warning shots
1 BigDaddy_Delta 2019-07-09
They were trained in the stormtrooper academy
1 2Manadeal2btw 2019-07-09
Who's more incompetent?
​
The dad who couldn't hit the woman with 39 rounds?
​
Or the woman who failed to kill a single one of the family, and got taken down by a 12 year old?
1 SchitPhucker 2019-07-09
that 12 year old is gonna feel like a total badass from now tho " i killed some tweaker cunt with a fookin knoife" god damn
1 VanillaReign 2019-07-09
That tweaker cunt is still alive tho
1 janniesRfags 2019-07-09
How the fuck do you stab someone with a wrench?
1 bebackinanhourorso 2019-07-09
It was a security bit in a socket.
1 Chapocel 2019-07-09
Pretty smart of the kid to grab something that had good hand feel. Pretty sure humiliated dad won't be telling him what to do anytime soon.
"Go to your room"
"What? Are you gonna shoot me?"
1 Grundleberries 2019-07-09
It's truly over for Eurocels. 😔
1 GhostA737 2019-07-09
That shit really must suck why the hell do they do that?
1 Redactor0 2019-07-09
I paid like $3 for Saint's Row: Gat out of Hell in this sale and I didn't even get the tactile experience of punching Satan in the face. These people should be thankful for how lucky they were.
1 SlowlyDying- 2019-07-09
BTFO by a 12 year old. He’s the man of the house now. Not the 39 bullet incompetence.
1 Throwaway847756438 2019-07-09
No worries. Just mental illness.
1 pepperouchau 2019-07-09
This is why we need common sense wrench control
1 Wild_Hunt 2019-07-09
Every fucking time