Too based for mankind? One man destroys DubTee in a furious onslaught of verbal evisceration. How will xhe recover?!

0  2019-07-19 by MikeHuntIsAnAsshole

12 comments

do not comment or vote in linked threads

I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns.

In The Lord of the Rings, J. R. R. Tolkien drew upon the language and themes found in the old Medieval hero-tales in order to construct a kind of new mythology. The brilliance of Tolkien was in his departure from the Pagan modes of conduct and morality of these old tales, his creation of a syncretistic fusion between Christian thought and Pagan language, and so his work achieved a deep resonance with all who read it.

We find this passage at the conclusion of The Return of the King:

>The Dark Lord was suddenly aware of him, and his Eye piercing all shadows looked across the plain to the door that he had made; and the magnitude of his own folly was revealed to him in a blinding flash, and all the devices of his enemies were at last laid bare.

Adversaries in the stories that Tolkien drew upon, Grendel, Mordred and the like, often served as obstacles that the heroes could overcome through feats of strength and cunning. Sauron is not like them. When Sauron is defeated, it is not because Aragorn is stronger than him or because Gandalf is wiser. They are not. It is only that his hubris was so great that it never occured to him that anyone would want to destroy the thing he held so dear. It is not until the final few seconds of his existence that he realises his mistake.

I think that I Am Jazz displays a similar moment. In the pictured scene, Jazz's journey to what he believes is womanhood is almost complete. He is resting after surgery, a triumphant smile on his face, his rotting groin held together by a labyrinthine patchwork of stitches and grafts. But as Eru Ilúvatar nudged Gollum over the Crack of Doom into the fires beneath, so too does the God of our world intervene in this.

>Pop!

In a second, the follies of men are undone and Jazz's crotch explodes, a meaty froth of blood and pus pouring out of the hole where his penis used to be.

In that moment of blind panic and terror, Jazz is Sauron. All triumph and victory is gone. Only the Void remains.

Snapshots:

  1. Too based for mankind? One man dest... - archive.org, archive.today, removeddit.com

I am just a simple bot, *not** a moderator of this subreddit* | bot subreddit | contact the maintainers

Extremely based, powermods are the worst kind of mayo, smelly and moldy.

mayos mad mayos mad mayos mad mayos mad mayos mad mayos mad mayos mad mayos mad mayos mad mayos mad mayos mad mayos mad mayos mad mayos mad mayos mad mayos mad mayos mad mayos mad mayos mad mayos mad mayos mad mayos mad mayos mad mayos mad

C O P E

O

P

E

You swine. You vulgar little maggot. Don't you know that you are pathetic? You worthless bag of filth. As we say in Texas, I'll bet you couldn't pour piss out of a boot with instructions on the heel. You are a canker. A sore that won't go away. I would rather kiss a lawyer than be seen with you.

You are a fiend and a coward, and you have bad breath. You are degenerate, noxious and depraved. I feel debased just for knowing you exist. I despise everything about you. You are a bloody nardless newbie twit protohominid chromosomally aberrant caricature of a coprophagic cloacal parasitic pond scum and I wish you would go away.

You're a putrescence mass, a walking vomit. You are a spineless little worm deserving nothing but the profoundest contempt. You are a jerk, a cad, a weasel. Your life is a monument to stupidity. You are a stench, a revulsion, a big suck on a sour lemon.

And what meaning do you expect your delusionally self-important statements of unknowing, inexperienced opinion to have with us? What fantasy do you hold that you would believe that your tiny-fisted tantrums would have more weight than that of a leprous desert rat, spinning rabidly in a circle, waiting for the bite of the snake?

You are a waste of flesh. You have no rhythm. You are ridiculous and obnoxious. You are the moral equivalent of a leech. You are a living emptiness, a meaningless void. You are sour and senile. You are a disease, you puerile one-handed slack-jawed drooling meatslapper.

This copypasta never gets old

S E E T H I N G

Reddit power jannies calling any else mayos is extreme hypocrisy.

It doesnt make it any less fun though and it still immensely triggers them

Pretty sure dub is actually a person of crime, which makes it legal for him to call out the dirty cumskins of reddit. Plus, WatchRedditDie is like, the third faggiest sub out there.