Streaming is the dumbest thing to ever get popular that I hope this venture does as much damage as possible to the entire platform. I will support any and every cause to nuke all streaming platforms. It was a mistake to dabble in these dark arts, and it must be dealt with.
You have no taste and you clearly don't know good cinema.
As opposed to Capeshit no.5562728?
Say what you want about Avatar, but at least it was a single directors’ vision and original IP. Not the 30th or so movie in a line of corporate Disney films that are made on a conveyor belt.
The Last Jedi is not only the worst Star Wars film, but the worst film of any kind that has ever been made and I can prove it mathematically. The sign of an objectively bad film is whether it contains plot holes or not. Most films contain at least one, e.g why didn't the Fellowship just ride those eagles all the way to Mordor? Even bad films tend not to have more than two or three though. I have collated a comprehensive list of plot holes in the Last Jedi, collected from a combination of myself and others. The final count is 11...now let's get started! When Rey finds Luke he tells her he doesn't want to teach her and came to this planet to be left alone/die. Then why did you leave behind a map saying where you were? That map should not exist. Unless Luke is still a moody teen crying for help. 'I'm running away forever, you guys better not follow those detailed instructions I left behind telling you where I'm going! Psst, take a left after Endor, if you've hit Hoth you've gone too far...' Why didn't General Hux just have half his fleet jump through hyperspace to in front of the Resistance Fleet, then turn around and catch them in a pincer movement and destroy them instantly? This could be explained by General Hux being stupid but I believe it impossible for someone so stupid to ever become a General and even if he had an IQ of 50 and couldn't figure out that tactic, the idea that none of his men slipped this in the suggestion box is more than improbable. The next five plot holes revolve around things that can only be explained by Vice Admiral Holdo also being incredibly dumb and the same logic applies, if she was this stupid then she shouldn't be able to figure out how to get out of bed in the morning, never mind command a fleet.
Holdo has no logical reason to not tell Poe her plan. He is an officer in her army and since he just destroyed the enemy's largest ship, the idea that he could be a spy is super dumb...The only reason she doesn't tell him her plan is because the 'plot' demands it so Finn and Rose can have a dumb casino adventure no one wanted.
If there are potential reinforcements that the resistance could call on, why is Holdo not trying to contact them from her fleet while they're travelling? If they resond and come to your rescue then you don't need to sacrifice every ship in your fleet, which was her 'masterplan'.
Let's be generous and say only the communications array at Crait is super power/handsome enough to transmit far enough. Then why not send one pilot ahead through hyperspace in a fighter (Poe perhaps? You know, that expert pilot you thought it was reasonable not to utilise in any way, shape or form) to Crait so they can send the transmission while you travel? Finn and Rose's socialism for dummies adventure proves that a small craft leaving the fleet through hyperspace doesn't attract first order attention.
Since you can send off small ships through hyperspace with no ramifications, then why not send a bunch of them off to collect fuel and bring it back so you don't run out?
If hyperspace ramming is so effective, then rather than sacrifice all your ships why not just empty two of them of all personnel, leaving them just enough fuel for one hyperspace jump each? Then put a droid on the bridge of either and tell them to ram the first order fleet? The enemy fleet is destroyed and you actually gain something from sacrificing your fleet.
If hyperspace ramming is possible, then why has no one ever used it ever? Sending one old large ship through hyperspace at the Death Star's core is a far better plan than relying on some farmboy being lucky. The hyperspace plot hole is so bad it causes plotholes in past films!
Also, spaceships don't need fuel to maintain a constant speed. They're in a vacuum, you only need fuel to accelerate or decelerate.
On Crait, Finn is travelling at top speed in a straight line towards the super sexy battering ram gun thing. How did Rose using the same type of vehicle catch up to him and then bank into his ship while maintaining the same forward momentum as it? That is impossible.
After Rose and Finn crash together they are stranded in front of the First Order army. How did they manage to run/limp all the way back to the base without being killed/captured?
The Last Jedi is also filled to the brim with feminist propaganda, and the movie exists explicitly to promote an anti-male agenda held by many elites. Rey is a flawless mary sue who outperforms established characters without training, including a trained Sith (by the way, the dark side was supposed to the "quick and easy" path), Kathleen Kennedy is racist and supports the worldwide destruction of the nation state.
Since The Last Jedi has the most plotholes ever recorded in a film that is proof that it is objectively the worst film ever made. This fails to even take into account the subjective reasons The Last Jedi is terrible: awful characters, a basic bitch of a plot, and zero good action scenes.
Star Wars used to promote an egalitarian social message through well-written characters who were worked naturally into the plot, but now the franchise is used to further a misandrist and racist agenda by means of incoherently-written characters who would fit comfortably into an incel manifesto.
You are sarcastic because you believe that Shakespeare is so far above Stan Lee that your condescending tone is justified. But that isn't the case.
Shakespeare plays were the MCU of it's time. It was pure pop culture, entertainment for the common man. Like marvel movies, Shakespeare plays also reference each other, which helps with building a somewhat loyal fanbase.
The difference is that, in contrast to Shakespeare plays, critics love marvel movies. So if anything, the case can be made that Stan Lee is better than Shakespeare at what made him famous.
You idiots have been bitching about superhero fatigue for ten years. Give it a rest. You are here dying on the hill for fucking Avatar. You have no taste and you clearly don't know good cinema. I think we're done here. Don't waste my time.
There’s nothing wrong with liking mindless entertainment. But when you try to pretend that mindless entertainment is more than it is, you are desperately retarded.
I swear the “all art is political” meme came to power because people wanted to feel smart for consuming dumb media.
18 comments
1 AutoModerator 2019-07-22
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1 SnapshillBot 2019-07-22
Streaming is the dumbest thing to ever get popular that I hope this venture does as much damage as possible to the entire platform. I will support any and every cause to nuke all streaming platforms. It was a mistake to dabble in these dark arts, and it must be dealt with.
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1 ResistingDaddyDrumpf 2019-07-22
Say what you want about Avatar, but at least it was a single directors’ vision and original IP. Not the 30th or so movie in a line of corporate Disney films that are made on a conveyor belt.
1 Mrtheliger 2019-07-22
Original is a bit of a stretch
1 ResistingDaddyDrumpf 2019-07-22
You know what I mean, like it was with his own characters and universe and shit. Obviously it was based off of a bunch of other stuff.
1 Burnnoticelover 2019-07-22
Dances with Smurfs intensifies
1 ImJustaBagofHammers 2019-07-22
The Last Jedi is not only the worst Star Wars film, but the worst film of any kind that has ever been made and I can prove it mathematically. The sign of an objectively bad film is whether it contains plot holes or not. Most films contain at least one, e.g why didn't the Fellowship just ride those eagles all the way to Mordor? Even bad films tend not to have more than two or three though. I have collated a comprehensive list of plot holes in the Last Jedi, collected from a combination of myself and others. The final count is 11...now let's get started! When Rey finds Luke he tells her he doesn't want to teach her and came to this planet to be left alone/die. Then why did you leave behind a map saying where you were? That map should not exist. Unless Luke is still a moody teen crying for help. 'I'm running away forever, you guys better not follow those detailed instructions I left behind telling you where I'm going! Psst, take a left after Endor, if you've hit Hoth you've gone too far...' Why didn't General Hux just have half his fleet jump through hyperspace to in front of the Resistance Fleet, then turn around and catch them in a pincer movement and destroy them instantly? This could be explained by General Hux being stupid but I believe it impossible for someone so stupid to ever become a General and even if he had an IQ of 50 and couldn't figure out that tactic, the idea that none of his men slipped this in the suggestion box is more than improbable. The next five plot holes revolve around things that can only be explained by Vice Admiral Holdo also being incredibly dumb and the same logic applies, if she was this stupid then she shouldn't be able to figure out how to get out of bed in the morning, never mind command a fleet.
The Last Jedi is also filled to the brim with feminist propaganda, and the movie exists explicitly to promote an anti-male agenda held by many elites. Rey is a flawless mary sue who outperforms established characters without training, including a trained Sith (by the way, the dark side was supposed to the "quick and easy" path), Kathleen Kennedy is racist and supports the worldwide destruction of the nation state. Since The Last Jedi has the most plotholes ever recorded in a film that is proof that it is objectively the worst film ever made. This fails to even take into account the subjective reasons The Last Jedi is terrible: awful characters, a basic bitch of a plot, and zero good action scenes.
1 LongPostBot 2019-07-22
Your pulitzer's in the mail
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1 Alicesnakebae 2019-07-22
Can we end disney drones
1 Funkyduffy 2019-07-22
🐀🐁🐭 🧀DAY 🧀OF 🧀THE 🧀MOUSETRAP🧀 🐭🐁🐀
1 ImJustaBagofHammers 2019-07-22
Star Wars used to promote an egalitarian social message through well-written characters who were worked naturally into the plot, but now the franchise is used to further a misandrist and racist agenda by means of incoherently-written characters who would fit comfortably into an incel manifesto.
1 pepperouchau 2019-07-22
Does impulsively spending gobs of money on tickets and merch count as being part of the production?
1 elephantofdoom 2019-07-22
Yes for Snappy
1 Osterion 2019-07-22
This is the worst thread I've ever read.
1 heretobefriends 2019-07-22
You are sarcastic because you believe that Shakespeare is so far above Stan Lee that your condescending tone is justified. But that isn't the case.
Shakespeare plays were the MCU of it's time. It was pure pop culture, entertainment for the common man. Like marvel movies, Shakespeare plays also reference each other, which helps with building a somewhat loyal fanbase.
The difference is that, in contrast to Shakespeare plays, critics love marvel movies. So if anything, the case can be made that Stan Lee is better than Shakespeare at what made him famous.
1 Quinilicious1 2019-07-22
B A S E D
1 Burnnoticelover 2019-07-22
There’s nothing wrong with liking mindless entertainment. But when you try to pretend that mindless entertainment is more than it is, you are desperately retarded.
I swear the “all art is political” meme came to power because people wanted to feel smart for consuming dumb media.