The experiment to have the Internet raise kids from birth has failed.

We need internet liscences now, before we somehow create a generation more pathetic than zoomers.

At least I was raised properly by the internet - - in the late 90s on IRC.

Are you the alt of the meme master that was?

If you are, you are one zoomer of few that has my respect. Otherwise, have sex.

How about you watch your mouth and never call me a zoomer again

Zoomer is as zoomer does.

No zoomer was on the internet in the late 90s. The eldest ones were like 1-4 years old.

He was a part of the advanced program.

Wtf is a zoomer? Wtf am i? I'm not a boomer, i'm technically millenial but i was born early 80s which means i'm not gen z... I'm gen y? Am i ymer? That doesn't sound as cool.

Part of the Ymar Republic.

That sounds vaguely familiar.

That's gen x isnt it?

You're gen x, you've already failed and have been forgotten.

I'm not gen x and there's nothing wrong with gen x.

Wikipedia: "Millennials, also known as Generation Y (or simply Gen Y), are the demographic cohort following Generation X and preceding Generation Z. Researchers and popular media use the early 1980s as starting birth years and the mid-1990s to early 2000s as ending birth years, with 1981 to 1996 a widely accepted definition."

I was born 83 which makes me gen y.

SILENCE! ✋🏿

https://youtu.be/6ukmjBSQY-c

Based

i was born early 80s

you're a boomer

Fine. Get off my lawn, zoomer!

It's mutually exclusive to have been an avid user of IRC and to be a zoomer. I have yet to meet zoomers irl who even know what irc is.

Half of zoomers think an iPad is a computer, so you might be on to something there

I was raised on 1980s BBSes, and you can see the mess that created.

i blame fidonet for my extreme tolerance of stupid opinions

fidonet was ruthless though

it was also chock full of pedos

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Not all of us are like that.

zoz

zle

zozzle

Observe the zoomer crying out in pain as he gets zozzled

Don't lie zoomer, I seen you dabbing and smoking the juul

You just got your asshole handed to you, z-tard.

Zoomers aren't people

Neither are roombas. But they exist. Apparently.

Oi mate, u got a loicense for those memes?

A Confederacy of Dunces is the most prophetic thing ever written.

They hated him because he told the truth.

have sex incel

Telling incels to have sex is like telling infidels to find solace is Allah’s boundless compassion and glory.

(PBUH)

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lol everyone in the replies are SEETHING

lol everyone in the replies are SEETHING

absolutely rent free. INCELS MAD (x24)

DING DING DING found the incel

Yikes have sex sweaty

Lol true

This boy's grapes are so sour he could weaponize them. This is some classic unfuckable-Christian-youth-ministry-moid shit.

That or some fate disgusting kid who knows he'll never get laid so he latches onto opinions that make not getting laid his choice

Thats gotta describe half the internet

That's literally just a less concise version of the parent comment you Neanderthal.

I wanna ping him so bad. That zoomer will make a fine lolcow

Lol he got you mad

Bahahhaha. This is totally individualized. First of all. And people don't change, second of all. You should never ever ever get online and preach again. You don't understand reality at all.

People are the exact same they were 1000 years ago, you fucking psycho. People don't change kid. Grow the fuck up and stop whining so much. Your life is your fault. You've been given opportunity most everyone from the past 20,000 years could only dream of. You're a loser and we didn't do it. We tried to help. You did it. You are that

Snapshots:

1. Teenager goes full turbo virgin in ... - archive.org, archive.today

I am just a simple bot, *not** a moderator of this subreddit* | bot subreddit | contact the maintainers

Teenagers shouldn’t be allowed on the internet

Why? I'm not like that.

All of you are bad, even the ones that are "okay"

Teens should have their own kindernet.

I’d honestly prefer zoomernet to the boomernet

I guess I'll go to the Ymar republic net.

Reported.

this kid is totally right, imagine having sex. 🤢 🤮

imagine not being a celibate priest living in service to God

The absolute state 😹😹😹

celibate Father in the streets, Daddy in the sheets 🤤

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Chad move is to be a Volcel polygamist who serves Allah and denies his wives sexual satisfaction.

Inshallahed

Btw how do the extremist suicide bombers think 72 virgins is enough? It won't be long until they're not virgins anymore.

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How did being a conservative become cool among teens all of a sudden? Zoomer right wingers are everywhere. Did I miss something?

It's mostly r*dditors in their 20s LARPing as teenagers

It's always kind of been horseshoe edgy to be a young republican instead of being happy and empathetic. When I was in HS in the 90's there was this kid who always wore suits and printed his own "alternative" newspaper that was basically just Bill Clinton hate recycled from the Rush's tv show mixed with anti-fun diatribes of his own.

I hate bill though. He's vomit.

Good for you. At the time he was still a lot better than Bob Dole or Newt Gingrich.

Ross

Perot

This was after the 92 election so Perot was teamed up with Jesse Ventura in Minnesota by then.

Based and smack-down pilled

Oh he died in July. Wow.

They're all vomit.

edgy take

Thanks.

OK so I'm an old goddamn man in his mid-twenties who is currently taking freshmen classes in college, let me clue you in on the dirty little secret.

These kids aren't cool. The leftoids kids aren't cool. Neither of them are fucking cool. In fact, a lot of people cannot fucking stand them. The rightoids get ignored, the leftoids get paid some respect cause people are terrified of being called a racist. But don't get it twisted, nobody actually likes any of this shit.

Yeah out of the "politically aware" zoomers, the post-post ironic radical centrists are the only cool ones.

Zoomer right wingers are everywhere. Did I miss something?

It's because it's the new counterculture and teenagers are drawn to that.

How the hell else are you supposed to rebel against today's parents? Back in my day you could just go goth/emo, be gay, or smoke weed to piss off your parents. Today's lefty parents would encourage all of those (and are probably already doing them themselves)

I think this almost romanticizes “the good old days”. This halcyon day mindset is a symptom of the current attitude in the world. As things get worse it’s always easier to dream about simplistic times, but the reality is that in life you can never go back. As soon as we can develop that mindset we can stop lashing out at each other like scared dogs in cages. We can move forward. It’s not left or right and we can’t just disassociate and treat politics like sports game where you’re loyal out of principle.

Rebelling has been around in different forms forever. We’re so busy fighting each other that we don’t realize that at the end of the day we are lashing out for the same reasons. It’s like pouring water into a tub that has a hole on the bottom. Change is so scary, but that’s ok because being scared is just being human, but so is being kind and understanding. Only when we’re faced with fear do we learn to be courageous. We learn valuable lessons along the way so we can do better. That’s what life is really, just learning. We’re not alone in this. Humanity first above all else.

“Greed has posioned men's souls, has barricaded the world with hate, has goose-stepped us into misery and bloodshed. We have developed speed, but we have shut ourselves in. Machinery that gives us abundance has left us in want. Our knowledge has made us cynincal. Our cleverness, hard and unkind. We think too much, and feel too little. More than machinery, we need humanity.”

No sincereposting in /r/drama

Trad Cath zoomers can be annoying as shit but the real drama here is all the seething in the comments.

OP there is super civil and not like a generic /r/zoomerright poster and literally everyone’s replies are “lol Virgin”

He legit brings up some good points too coming from someone who doesn’t really agree

First they ignore you, then they laugh at you, then they fight you, then you change your gender and win. 😌

Suddenly, a klaxon starting blaring through the metal corridors and cold, exterior shell of the battle cruiser.

"Sir, is that"- "Yes," the captain interjected, interrupting his lieutenant with a crestfallen look to the XO, "Our worst nightmares have been realised. It's the unironic Who Hurt You alarm".

Grimly, the flight deck staff looked from one another, before all eyes fell deathly silent on the captain; himself lost in a maelstrom of dread- knowing what had to be done.

"Executive Officer Dravis", he beckoned, "please enter your armament key". "Sir?" The XO hesitated, his hand trembling over the console. "That's an order, Dravis" the captain repeated.

The key entered its slot, and Dravis turned it 90 degrees clockwise; his eyes fixed on the majecstic beauty of the Earth in the view window infront. The captain took a deep breath. "... Fire."

And before their own eyes, the Earth was obliterated in to a billion tiny, hot white pieces; miniscule asteroids fizzing in to nothingness as they hit the ionic shields.

"It had to be done, captain", the lieutenant reassured.

"I know", came the reply as the captain raised the pistol to his own temple, "but I've always been a coward".

😴😴😴

You are a faggot, and this was performed out of instinct. *Contact me if you want to die.*

Yo

Beautiful. 😪

Probably the first actually unpopular opinion

In other words the sex will have no effect on anything in your life outside of the bedroom. Looking at sex this way, smells of psychopathy. Those who view sex this way look upon those they have sex with as objects.

don't shame people for using others as fleshlights brah 😎

Not treating foids like cum buckets and moids like cum dispensers isn't very progressive of you bro

Idk any teenager who talks like that. Diction is too advanced. If it is truly a teenager, he/she spent some time to cultivate his words into that final product.

I'm not really sure that this is a failing of the internet.

The reproductive standard is thousands of years old and we've only just recently (historically speaking) started moving into pleasure standard terrority.

I'm sure they haven't even gotten to learning about sexual history (let alone sexual health) in his public school in southern Virginia.

Also, he's a (dumb) teenager. His opinion is almost worthless.

Almost?

LOL, volcel zoomer Chad trolls millenial degenerates.

Cope∆

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Yiiiikes who hurt you incel

No the point of sex is to have sex. Kids are an unfortunate byproduct of failed birth control. The alien overlords designed it this way to punish people for having fun.

Blegh. That guy is never getting laid which is good for the gene pool.

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The only thing worse than people who overvalue sex are people who put any value on not having sex.

Literally a virgin with rage

Sounds like a conservative!

Dude literally has his real name as his username wtf

Fitzgerald being 🔥🔥🔥 in the comments

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“Ur just the same kind of asshole that sits there tell people that driving a car isn’t fun, but has never once driven a car urself”

Honestly, if you think that driving cars is fun you’re more of a consoomer than Star Wars soyboys.