It's my birthday today.

1  2019-12-17 by GeminiRocket

I'm alone at a bar, slightly drunk, browsing Amazon & Co and /r/drama . What should I gift myself ?

30 comments

1  SnapshillBot 2019-12-17

Okay, so first of all, you've just made a reply to me that is in two unrelated parts. The first is unrelated to anything I said. As long as you comport yourself in this manner, you will only be met with derision. It is a nonsense method of communication.

Snapshots:

  1. It's my birthday today. - archive.org, archive.today

  2. /r/drama - archive.org, archive.today

I am just a simple bot, *not** a moderator of this subreddit* | bot subreddit | contact the maintainers

1  Dedod_2 2019-12-17

Gift yourself a few hours with prime bussy

1  McFluff_TheCrimeCat 2019-12-17

Some drugs?

1  baIIrot 2019-12-17

Fuck yeah Amazon got hella whippits

1  GeminiRocket 2019-12-17

No illegals shit like drug & paid sex. I have 700$ to spend on something nice.

1  shitmemesimake 2019-12-17

Wait how is your username “Gemini” if you are a Sagittarius 🤔

1  GeminiRocket 2019-12-17

That's the name of an early burger space program. No sagittarius rocket, nobody likes sagittarius.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Project_Gemini

1  shitmemesimake 2019-12-17

Thank you for educating me. I like you.

1  shitpersonality 2019-12-17

Buy a dick pump and a porno mag.

1  GeminiRocket 2019-12-17

You're joking but I Googled best birthday gift and I got theses titties pump. Scroll down.

https://www.cnet.com/news/best-holiday-gifts-under-500-for-2019/

Do Americans women really do this?

1  shitpersonality 2019-12-17

Are you asking if American women pump breast milk from their tits? Have sex, kid.

1  GeminiRocket 2019-12-17

Well I guess they do zoomer : https://youtu.be/cUFZuYKdfcs

1  texanapocalypse33 2019-12-17

See the best escort your flyover shithole city has to offer

1  [deleted] 2019-12-17

[removed]

1  shitmemesimake 2019-12-17

Buy me something instead 🤗

1  GeminiRocket 2019-12-17

What do you want ?

1  shitmemesimake 2019-12-17

For you to have a good birthday 🤗🎂🎈♐️ enjoy the gold

1  GeminiRocket 2019-12-17

y-you too.

1  Dramacel69 2019-12-17

Thank you, kind strangerino!

1  capthazelwoodsflask 2019-12-17

Are you feeling up to a challenge?

Maybe give yourself a hand?

1  GeminiRocket 2019-12-17

Nearly went for it until I saw the reviews.

1  capthazelwoodsflask 2019-12-17

Fuck that then. It's a lot smaller than I would need too.

1  Dramacel69 2019-12-17

How old is you my nigga

1  GeminiRocket 2019-12-17

30...33.

1  Dramacel69 2019-12-17

Get drunk as fuck and pester some foid into giving you birthday gussy (or ask a moid for bussy, if you're into that 😆😆)

1  SendWhiskey 2019-12-17

Go buy a light up bong and some purple goo. Happy birthday, man!

1  Mrtheliger 2019-12-17

Take a road trip. Just start driving and see where you end up

1  GeminiRocket 2019-12-17

In jail ? I'm probably five times above the limit.

1  Mrtheliger 2019-12-17

Well that's your own fault then. Wallow in your self pity some more slave

1  Bbekko 2019-12-17

Buy a dog

Happy birthday!