'The Official Guide to Game of Thrones Fans' Book announcement, Chapters and Prologue

Foreword

by Qyburn, a fictional character.

Upon being invited to write a foreword for this book, I politely demurred, to the best of my limited ability being, as I am no diplomat. If you will indulge me, I confess I did not know what type of composition a foreword is. In our world, scribes do not expend vellum, ink, or time on such text. If the words were worthy of committing to ink, we do not seek a renowned name to vouch for them. However the patient people who composed and prepared this volume were kind enough to illuminate me. In our world we do not have electric cell driven counterparts to ravens, so we write tersely.

Quite quickly, I was enthralled by the scope and efficiency of these electric libraries. For example, some have used a special sheet for arithmetic, to estimate when the playwright who created these stories might have another instalment for his audience. As a man of learning, I was somewhat disheartened to learn that such artistic matters are not amenable to reason. The attempt was considered a folly and the matter is rarely spoken of now, to spare the experimenter's blushes and for fear of retaliation.

Such lengths travelled in anticipation of long plays is not something one is accustomed to, as our peasants must focus on harvesting food and preserving food for extended winters, and surviving those aforementioned seasons. This world of yours affords so many a life that leaves material scarcity behind. One assumes that leads the mind to devise impractical problems to be concerned with. However I, Qyburn, will make no claim of success in discerning the phenomena that allow the human mind to function, or more pointedly, fail to function. I only have a human mind with which to devise a paradigm for the human mind and because of that, it would be arrogance and vanity to attempt such study.

And many failures to function mentally have been recorded, and distributed, on this Internet of yours. Mothers have cast their daughters from their breasts, for the wenches named their offspring after a queen in a story. Many children on the brink of maturity have been directed to seek counsel from special speakers who dissuade the youths from ending their own lives.

At the same time, formerly dutiful censors of fora for the discussion of these tales became incandescent. In fits of incontinent rage and foul humour, they tore into each other and into the audience. Some revealed the true given and inherited names, place of abode and the special addresses by which you good men send ravens. This is not a matter of consequence in our lands, but your civilisation finds the prospect terrifying.

The tireless electric ravens flew between these censors, who do not receive any recompense. Spirits were disheartened, fingers were pointed, tempers rose, and threats were dispatched. Not merely calls for arms or threats of murder. Threats of an intimate kind, that a lady should only learn about in a history of cities that fell after a long siege. I will not be more explicit in that, because it is a form of foulness I never witnessed among the privileged few who can read and write in our kingdoms. I have witness it on and off the battle field, but not from those who would censor speech for reason of morality - only from the kind of outlaw that the no Lord would send to the Nights Watch. Such men are summarily executed by any Lord who wishes to retain his reputation.

A good story in a strange land benefits from a map. Alas, this book is not about a country, it is about groups of people communicating via this Internet that conveys pages electrically between folk. So a map I will not present. Instead I found scholars of children's stories have devised an analytic paradigm for categorising and arranging such peoples. If it the pleases the reader, this uses a simple grid that lends an academic raven's eye view of the battlefield, as it were.

Alignment Map

Lawful good	Neutral good	Chaotic good
Academy of Television Arts & Sciences (Emmy Awards)	Home Box Office, a division of WarnerMedia	ASOIAFCirclejerk.reddit.com
		OzzyManReviews
Lawful neutral	True neutral	Chaotic neutral
WatchersOnTheWall.com	georgerrmartin.com/notablog/	IsWinterComing.net
Lawful evil	Neutral evil	Chaotic evil
ASOIAF.reddit.com	Westeros.org	Freefolk.reddit.com
GameOfThrones.reddit.com		IsWinterComing.net

I have yet to discern the point of all this passion and wrath is, but I must confess the contortions, overreactions and inversions of the various factions to be amusing and diverting.

The work continues.