Today I saw the death of millions of rightoids

72  2020-01-05 by cielxyuriplisetsky

I was walking down the street in rightyville south carolina when i saw her. Greta Thunberg was walking down the sidewalk sipping an Arizona tea. Many rightoids were surrounding her sobbing just at her mere presence. Eventually Greta finished her tea. Then she threw it away in a recycling bin. As soon as the can entered the bin, the mass suicide started.

Rightoids nonstop killing themselves because Greta had put a can in recycling. Some hung themselves. Others set themselves on fire. A couple even brought out bathtubs on wheels, sat in the bathtubs then drop toasters in the bathtubs. All because of greta. Of course some of them attempted to shoot themselves in the head, but were so retarded they missed and hit innocent children instead.

Soon the streets were littered with millions of rightoid corpses. All because of Greta.

132 comments

1  ComedicSans 2020-01-05

user reports:
1: this is a work of art pls sticky

You're goddamned right it is. The fat kid on the right of the picture of the rightoids trying to hang themselves is a masterpiece.

12  byobombs 2020-01-05

masterpiece

You mean MasterLawlz?

1  pol__invictus__risen 2020-01-05

Remind you of your last 5 attempts or something?

1  ComedicSans 2020-01-05

I'm not a fat, depressed and suicidal brainlet, for I am not a Burger.

1  pol__invictus__risen 2020-01-05

I'm not a fat, depressed and suicidal brainlet

You should really be suicidal and depressed though, being as disgustingly fat and pathetic as you are.

1  ComedicSans 2020-01-05

disgustingly fat and pathetic

As I previously said, I'm not a Burger.

1  pol__invictus__risen 2020-01-05

No, you've just eaten two million of them.

1  ComedicSans 2020-01-05

Mega-sick burn by the Fentanylese Islander. ☠☠☠☠

We No Speak Americano.

1  pol__invictus__risen 2020-01-05

I took a shit last week that look kind of like new zealand, but bigger.

1  ComedicSans 2020-01-05

loves Donald Trump

does shits so large he can't flush the toilet

Holy shit, you are Donald Trump.

1  pol__invictus__risen 2020-01-05

What part of "bigger than new zealand" do you imagine implies "too big to flush down a toilet"?

1  ComedicSans 2020-01-05

I know you didn't pay attention in school, but you do realise that the country is bigger than its representation on the map, right?

Also mindblowing: there isn't a giant "Rand McNally" or "Google maps" floating in the oceans, either.

1  pol__invictus__risen 2020-01-05

you do realise that the country is bigger than its representation on the map, right?

This is such pure fucking cope I'm getting high just looking at it, let alone what's going to happen when I sn-AHGHGHGHGGHGHGHH oh fuck yes that's the good stuff.

1  ComedicSans 2020-01-05

I'm glad learning things makes you so happy.

1  pol__invictus__risen 2020-01-05

I'm glad insignificance and tininess does the same for you.

1  ComedicSans 2020-01-05

not having a country full of poor retards

Yes, woe is me.

1  pol__invictus__risen 2020-01-05

not having a country full of poor retards

On opposite day?

1  ComedicSans 2020-01-05

Does your parole officer know you're frequenting kindergartens again?

1  pol__invictus__risen 2020-01-05

If I wanted to fuck people with the brains of children, I'd find an NZ girl

Should be ez since the lads are all busy with the sheep

1  ComedicSans 2020-01-05

Your paedo fantasies are between you and your therapist.

I think the only surprise is that you said "girl" and not "boy".

1  pol__invictus__risen 2020-01-05

Typical mind fallacy I guess.

1  ComedicSans 2020-01-05

You once mentioned pizzas. That's evidence enough.

84  BIknkbtKitNwniS 2020-01-05

Beautiful drawings. The fatness and whiteness of the rightoids, the distance between Greta's eyes, everything was on point.

👏👏👏

53  cielxyuriplisetsky 2020-01-05

Thank you, she honestly looks like an autistic dolphin.

33  ComedicSans 2020-01-05

An angry autistic dolphin.

36  QuantumFreakonomics 2020-01-05

Is Greta 18 yet?

79  HoBoLoBro 2020-01-05

lolbertarians out

34  CantWakeUpJPG 2020-01-05

🤨🤔

25  cielxyuriplisetsky 2020-01-05

no :(

20  fudgicle2018 2020-01-05

she looks like she's 9.

19  AnnoyinTheGoyim 2020-01-05

She’s probably got a touch of the downs. Downies look and act like children for their entire lives.

12  FrostBittenSalsa 2020-01-05

That's what happens when your rich white parents drink shnaps while you're still in the womb

9  cielxyuriplisetsky 2020-01-05

She has Aspergers. Does that count?

2  Chapose 2020-01-05

Yes

2  fudgicle2018 2020-01-05

That's what bugs me about her whole deal. Nothing to do with her issues and the politics involved, etc. So much of the time she looks miserable. Her few light moments seem staged and forced. I worry she's being "stage mom'd" and used by a variety of folks for a variety of reasons.

3  OnlyRacistOnReddit 2020-01-05

Stage mom'd nothing. She's being straight up puppet mastered.

3  fudgicle2018 2020-01-05

Look for her on Dr. Phil in 5 years doing a tell-all about how awful this time was for her.

3  OnlyRacistOnReddit 2020-01-05

I think it will be worse than that actually. I wouldn't be surprised if her story turns really tragic. I won't be happy about it, at all, but I won't be the least bit surprised.

1  [deleted] 2020-01-05

[removed]

7  PUBLIQclopAccountant 2020-01-05

Hi John McAffee

3  thefoodieat 2020-01-05

I'd like to say that McAffee is the only father figure I've had in my life

2  Wraith_GraveSpell 2020-01-05

She's not a whale so she's safe

2  watchtheflowersgrow 2020-01-05

Isn't she autistic?

1  allahsmissionary 2020-01-05

Yes, but so are you

35  specialdialingwand1 2020-01-05

nice

30  cielxyuriplisetsky 2020-01-05

HOLY SHIT I unironically want that shirt

13  specialdialingwand1 2020-01-05

https://www.teepublic.com/t-shirt/5815084-greta-is-cool-as?utm_source=paid_search&utm_medium=ppc&utm_campaign=PLA&utm_content=tshirt-unisex&feed_sku=5815084D1V&utm_source=google&utm_medium=cpc&utm_campaign=PLA&ar_clx=yes&ar_channel=google&ar_campaign=1510062400&ar_adgroup=57012254846&ar_ad=383964090640&ar_strategy=search&gclid=CjwKCAiAjMHwBRAVEiwAzdLWGPUhwmTlr3WRF8oJJSG9p2JomPQBUqeGrcVL-q1a7neuGMimB1PNlxoC3lcQAvD_BwE&gclsrc=aw.ds

27  yeetsaucepeteross 2020-01-05

Need a longer URL please

1  [deleted] 2020-01-05

[removed]

16  queerjihad 2020-01-05

Ummmm why is the 5xl size $3 more expensive? Blatant fatphobia

2  Giulio-Cesare 2020-01-05

God I want that mug.

2  cielxyuriplisetsky 2020-01-05

ty!!!!!!!!!

2  OnlyRacistOnReddit 2020-01-05

Who wants a picture of me wearing it... and nothing else.

30  Giulio-Cesare 2020-01-05

16 year old girl with aspergers literally has the power to make millions of rightoids sperg out across the planet

Maybe it really is a super power.

9  cielxyuriplisetsky 2020-01-05

India watch out!

1  Chapose 2020-01-05

Shit you could wear that ironically or unironically. Wonder what was intended...

34  tallcelvolcel 2020-01-05

Imagine not choosing self immolation lmao it's over for ropecels

31  tHeSiD 2020-01-05

You should make a cinematic universe around people who make rightoids seethe

29  OnAPartyRock 2020-01-05

Nice effort post.

23  cielxyuriplisetsky 2020-01-05

thx

22  darth_stroyer 2020-01-05

Really good post. Keep it up!

14  cielxyuriplisetsky 2020-01-05

thanks :)

18  Al_Simmons 2020-01-05

My country is on fire with fires in places that have never had them before and rightoids were saying "climate change garbage." Absolute brainlets.

20  FrostBittenSalsa 2020-01-05

Admitting to being a filthy penal colony peasant

15  dotdot00 2020-01-05

your country deserves it

8  TheLordHighExecu 2020-01-05

This is Allah's punishment for the Iraq Wat

4  pm-ur-asshole-pls 2020-01-05

Ur retarded

2  pol__invictus__risen 2020-01-05

Sorry you morons can't fight fires lmao.

Guess we all have to embrace global socialism because aussies are shitty at being civilized.

1  Al_Simmons 2020-01-05

Sorry you burgers can't be skinny. Guess you morons can't eat properly.

17  TheBraverButthole 2020-01-05

Based. Based. TRULY based.

16  MinerHornet 2020-01-05

All because Climate Girl no shut up. smh.

14  McFluff_TheCrimeCat 2020-01-05

True.

14  artemis_m_oswald 2020-01-05

80% upvote

SEETHING

13  -Ph03niX- 2020-01-05

Marina Abramović should make this into shitty performance art.

6  The_Reason_Pete_Wins 2020-01-05

I'd pay to go to that show

9  slugulon 2020-01-05

Even for this place this shits retarded

9  Linds7288 2020-01-05

Please tell me the fatty who broke the noose is okay? He’s my favorite character.

14  cielxyuriplisetsky 2020-01-05

Yes he's doing fine. He's on suicide watch by Epstein's guards so he should be alright :)

His name is Hunter

8  Damuel 2020-01-05

This needs way more red hats to be believable.

6  baIIrot 2020-01-05

You got the hair wrong

6  Comrade_Natalie 2020-01-05

Lmao

6  Blazedrop 2020-01-05

Ima beat my meat to this shit

6  muffler_kek 2020-01-05

100x better than wojak

5  QuadNarca 2020-01-05

I haven't laughed my head off this much in a long time, thanks.

4  OniTan 2020-01-05

Needs more South Park gifs.

4  [deleted] 2020-01-05

[deleted]

4  OnlyRacistOnReddit 2020-01-05

I love how Greta gets closer and closer, yet her eyes get further and further apart.

3  bloodfort_andromeda 2020-01-05

alhamd’lilah greta 🙏

2  kitkat395 2020-01-05

I can't stop laughing at the stupid closeups of Greta, thank you OP.

1  SnapshillBot 2020-01-05

Pushshift is currently having an outage at the moment, so removeddit links will likely not work. Also archive.is is on a new domain again, so while the domain is updated, you'll need to archive posts and comments manually. Sorry. :(

Snapshots:

  1. Today I saw the death of millions o... - archive.org, archive.today

  2. Greta Thunberg - archive.org, archive.today

  3. rightoids - archive.org, archive.today

  4. threw it away in a recycling bin - archive.org, archive.today

  5. hung themselves - archive.org, archive.today

  6. set themselves on fire - archive.org, archive.today

  7. drop toasters in the bathtubs - archive.org, archive.today

  8. greta - archive.org, archive.today

  9. attempted to shoot themselves in th... - archive.org, archive.today

  10. Greta - archive.org, archive.today

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1  Wrpy 2020-01-05

The autism is strong with this one

1  [deleted] 2020-01-05

[removed]

1  [deleted] 2020-01-05

[deleted]

1  Chapose 2020-01-05

Lawlz tier post. Congrats?

1  [deleted] 2020-01-05

[removed]

1  pol__invictus__risen 2020-01-05

Why are leftoid autismos so addicted to the idea that anyone is mad about Grating Thundersperg?

Is it because they need to believe that FAS sufferers like themselves actually matter?

Like, gosh guys, please, no, don't make the autism babby the face of Global Warming activism. Don't make this repulsive, unlikeable person the figurehead of your movement. That would just be terrible.

Stop guys. It's too much. We can't take anymore.

Nooo.

1  yann_causse 2020-01-05

flair: autism

And it shows.

-5  FagglePuss 2020-01-05

"PLEASE STOP FORGETTING ABOUT GRETA. SHE'S SUPPOSED TO MAKE YOU SEETHE."

​

*Nobody gives a shit*

​

"AW FUCK I BETTER MAKE A SHITTY FUCKING STICKY. LOOK AT THE GRETA, EVERYBODY, LOOK AT IT."

​

Give it up, faggot, kids are crying about "drafts" now.

20  The_Reason_Pete_Wins 2020-01-05

Cope

16  cielxyuriplisetsky 2020-01-05

ah it wouldn't be drama without one schizocomment.

But seriously what are you trying to say?

11  wafflesrawsome 2020-01-05

what's with the seethe?

3  Wraith_GraveSpell 2020-01-05

Seethe