In defense of Leonardo Dicaprio's penis

1  2020-01-10 by TryitoutJulia

I'm sick of seeing Leo get dragged through the mud for dating young women.

No longer will I listen to salty old spinsters call him creepy.

He's not just in it for their looks.

Below I will attempt to make a logical case explaining why an A-list actor would be dating young models.


First, let's look at the careers led by both parties:

The Women

They are all models or actresses (or both).

  • Gisele Caroline Bündchen is a Brazilian model, environmental activist, author, actress, and businesswoman.

  • Bar Refaeli is an Israeli model, television host, actress, and entrepreneur.

  • Blake Ellender Lively is an American actress.

  • Erin Heather Bubley, known professionally as Erin Heatherton, is an American model.

  • Antonia "Toni" Garrn is a German fashion model, actress and humanitarian.

  • Kelly Rohrbach is an American actress.

  • Nina Brohus Agdal is a Danish model.

The Man

  • Leonardo Wilhelm DiCaprio is an American actor, producer, and environmentalist.

From this, we can conclude Leo is dating within his career field, and all the women are actresses or models


Next, lets look at some basic stats regarding the age of female models:

The TSM Agency, one of the top model staffing agencies, reviewed their extensive database of over 30,000 models to answer the question

61% of models were between the age of 18 and 32.

27% of models fell between the ages 28 and 32.

Models over the age of 43 are 2% of our sample group.


From this, we can conclude most female models are in their twenties


Finally, lets take a completely pointless dive into celebrity news for some insight on the relationships.

Gisele Caroline Bündchen

Bündchen explained that the breakup came as a result of trying to better herself after struggling with anxiety, debilitating panic attacks and suicidal thoughts.“I didn’t feel like I could share my panic attacks with anyone," she said. "So I’d suppress it, and the more I suppressed it, the bigger it became.”

At one point, the interview revealed, Bündchen considered jumping off of a balcony, and it was the catalyst for her seeking help. To better herself, she surrounded herself with loved ones and stripped herself of her unhealthy habits, which made her realize DiCaprio was not the one for her despite how much she loved him.


Bar Refaeli

A source told the New York Post newspaper: 'It was amicable, they're still friends and they are still talking. They just grew apart and went their separate ways.

'Neither are ready to settle down, and both have busy careers that have been taking them in different directions.'


Blake Ellender

Before saying vows with Hollywood star Ryan Reynolds, Blake canoodled with a couple of other big names. She doesn’t have a long list of dating history by any means and has also admitted to being very selective on who she dates.

After her relationship with Penn Badgely ended, she was briefly linked with actor Ryan Gosling, though a relationship was never confirmed. Then, in 2011, Blake had a classic summer fling with movie star Leonardo DiCaprio. The pair travelled all over Europe before ending things after just a few months of dating.


Erin Heatherton

When their ten-month relationship ended in September 2012, with both parties citing 'busy schedules' as reason for the split, Erin would say only that she was enjoying throwing herself into her work.

For his part, DiCaprio hurled himself into shooting The Great Gatsby in Australia, then Django Unchained in New Orleans followed by the Wolf of Wall Street in New York.

A source told US Weekly at the time: 'There's no bad blood - they still care about each other a lot.


Antonia Garrn

In the podcast of "Online Marketing Rockstars" (OMR), Garrn unpacks for the first time her relationship with the actress she "met privately" dating from 2013-2014.

Toni Garrn and Leonardo DiCaprio are still friends

For her ex she has only loving words left and says, "We are still friends. It was beautiful in the meantime, it ended well and everything is fine. "

Garrn continues, "It was a time in my life, I was very young. It was a great relationship and has brought me a lot, but has nothing to do with my career, my job. "


Kelly Rohrbach

A source told the magazine: 'It was mutual. They both have intense work schedules and a lot going on in their lives right now. They both needed to take a break because of that. 'They are still friends and talking but it’s over.'

Another source told People: 'They are very friendly and it's super amicable. They are both so busy and he's got a big movie coming out and she's one of the biggest super models in the world.

'There is no other person in the picture.'


Ninda Agdal

A source near Nina and her then-boyfriend told People:

“Leo thought Nina was a super cool girl. It almost seemed different this time because he was way more affectionate and public with her than he normally is, but his friends knew it wouldn’t last…He’s not ready to settle down and just isn’t in the mindset to get married or have kids.”

“Nina and Leo have parted ways. It is amicable. They remain friends,” the source adds.


From this, we can conclude most relationships ended amicably


Lets put these notes together:

  1. Leo is dating within his career field, which include actresses and models
  2. Most female models are in their twenties
  3. Most relationships ended amicably

Conclusions: It makes perfect sense that Leo dates models and actresses, as he's around them all the time. Most people date within their career field. It makes sense the women are young. The average model is in her 20s. The relationships (for the most part) ended in a friendly way, eliminating any need to consider Leo a predator.


Bonus Devil's Advocate:

Why doesn't anyone flip the script: why are these 20 year old models dating a man twice their age? You can't be critical of Leo dating young without being critical of why young girls are dating someone twice their age.

Let's be fair here, both parties benefit: Leo gets to date a young model, and the budding model gets exposure for dating an A-lister. According to my research, none of these girls have regrets, or feel taken advantage of. It's a happy compromise.


VERDICT: Leo is smashing prime model gussy on the daily and crusty old maids will forever be salty about it.

29 comments

https://www.sickchirpse.com/wp-content/uploads/2015/01/Leo-Beach.jpg

Still weird that he decides to hang out with all her twenty something friends on vacations. If you date someone way younger you usually avoid her friends because they are annoying cunts

definitely plowing all of them afterwards 😎😎😎

I think by weird you mean based

https://www.google.com/amp/s/life.shared.com/amp/leonardo-di-caprio-reveals-why-his-mother-is-the-one-truest-love-of-his-life

Based

Edit : I saved like 10 links to show you how truly miserable he was but I lost them

Having everything anyone could ever want and still being sad is probably one of the most emotions you could have

Girls always want you to be part of their social circle too so that awkward few hours inevitably comes where you have to go hang out with her friends. And if they decide to meet somewhere in public, anyone who sees you knows exactly what's going on.

Maybe he just wants to relax and spend a few hours with retards sometimes, like Gregory House knowing the plot of every soap opera.

JANNIES, TAG AS EXCESS AUTISM plz

Done

yikes, ed is gonna be mad

Where’s the tag, you fuck?

It turns out the real tag was inside you all along.

You can't be critical of Leo dating young without being critical of why young girls are dating someone twice their age.

foids are like children and shouldn't be criticized or held responsible for their actions

[deleted]

Chicks are jealous and bitter, news at 11.

Try hard posters are worse than zoomers

TL;DR OP is flirting with libertarianism

I can almost picture op in 2014 screaming like a lunatic cause his boy Leo didn't get is Oscar.

He does it for free

I’m always amazed how few people know about Gamergate. It’s not only the key to understanding so many violent harassment campaigns going on today, it’s lots of the same people angry about the same stuff using the same playbook.

Snapshots:

  1. In defense of Leonardo Dicaprio's p... - archive.org, archive.today

  2. dragged through the mud for dating ... - archive.org, archive.today

  3. salty old spinsters - archive.org, archive.today

  4. creepy - archive.org, archive.today

  5. their looks - archive.org, archive.today

  6. The TSM Agency, one of the top mode... - archive.org, archive.today

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I actually get so blackpilled when I realize most of you fags are depressed losers who most likely gravitated here because no one likes them and not because they actually have intellectual backing for their

Outlines:

  1. The TSM Agency, one of the top mode... - Outline

I am a bot for posting Outline.com links. github / Contact for info or issues

On the Shit Model Mgmt Instagram, there was a post where lots of the models commented about their weird experiences with him when they were like 15/16.

Edit: I do know another girl (a model) who went to dinner with him but she was in her late 20s.

Edit 2: that girl went to dinner with Leo for free but the Winklevoss twins I believe paid. 👀

He's not just in it for their looks.

I mean, he is, but That's A Good Thing.™

As autistic as this post is, I do understand the feeling of thinking about his dick to an unhealthy amount. How do you think it smells like? And the texture? Makes me rock hard just imagining it oh yea honey

Consider never using the internet again.

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Actually based OP for making this.

Basically everyone knows this, anyone whining about it is just sour grapes.