Redditors jerk themselves raw

1  2021-06-04 by offshoreredditaccnt

186 comments

Everyone's sensitive. I don't know how anyone ever got the idea that "MY group isn't full of sensitive crybabies!". Your group is full of sensitive crybabies. Humans are sensitive crybabies. Except for arr drama of course, our group isn't full of sensitive crybabies.

Our group is full of slightly homosexual r-slurs

Slightly? Excuse me buddy, we are all full homos

I'm only slightly homo, kinda weird because I don't know what to call it

I know a river in egypt that has an accurate name for what you're describing

If I was in denial, I wouldn't have admitted that I'm slightly homo tho

denying that youre even in denial, terminal case of cope confirmed

Lmao got em

You're bargaining, don't worry acceptance comes soon. Come out king it's pride month 😌 😌 😌

I'd never kiss another dude but God damn some guys at my gym are fucking built.

Yeah I be 'mirin.

If I said me and my bro didn't used to hit up gay bars on our way to the casino to get dudes to buy us free drinks so we'd hit up the roulette table with a good buzz I'd be lying.

🥵🌶♨🔥

kinda weird because I don't know what to call it

Deeply closeted

Everything is homo by default. That's why people specifically call out when something is "no homo".

We are the praxi for homo-fascism

Slighty?

Except for arr drama of course, our group isn't full of sensitive crybabies.

Pizzashill is here atm

He came back?

slowpoke.jpg

I use Reddit like once a month u fslur

Is that supposed to be our fault?

Your a fslur for using this shit social media platform and you should feel bad about it. Your a redditor just admit it

I'm not sensitive, I'm just tired.

So very, very tired.

Just go to sleep forever friend 🤗

Nah I want to shit post forever! Life is worth shit posting for!

>MDEposting in arrg drama

im not seething, you are 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭

Is it MDEposting? I’ve never watched the show

The show is funny as shit. Nick Rochefort is a smart man. So is charls. But charls went crazy like me.

Sam is a bit. Hydewars is funny.

Most people disparage true mde fans as pol tards and I will not tolerate this libel anymore!

yeah, it should be pretty charming and non-offensive for most locals

officer maggot especially should be required viewing for any BLM-adjacent group or individual

Although I'm not a huge fan of Sam Hyde, "he can't keep getting away with this" will always crack me up.

yes

Want proof? Post anything left leaning on this sub, sit back and watch the waterworks.

leftoids and rightoids both get evicted 😎

That would be sweet. But nah. Some people flame right*ids, but let’s not pretend that they’re not far more accepted around here.

You're not wrong.

I think it's because the rest of reddit is so left-leanong. It makes roghtoids into the "counter-culture", and this sub is contrarian by nature, so there's a lot of overlap.

At its core this sub is probably the last remnant of "old" internet culture left on reddit. A memory of the times when you could say anything, and when you would get just as many insults and """death threats""" if you called for extermination of the jews, as if you called roses pretty or some vidya overrated. That sort of extreme free speech free-for-all is of course enticing for rightoids, because it allows them to say the shit they get banned for everywhere else. But those rslurs don't care about the culture of such a place either, so just like leftoids who weasel their way into mod positions and create digital gulags, rightoids also destroy the native culture of a forum they "immigrate" to.

I just hope MDEfugess don't turn this into the 110s sub to get jannied. There's a concerning amount of border hoppers here already, going by votes in some threads. This sub has weathered shit like it before, so I hope it pulls through again.

If it goes private again, I only hope to become an approvedcel. I need my retirement home interactions, dammit!

Okay Grandpa you’re starting to longpost, time for your meds.

im gunna have 2 ask u 2 keep ur giant dumps in the toilet not in my replys 🤢

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Rightoid infestation here is definitely more of a recent thing. Them getting evicted and Reddit trending further and further left probably led a lot of them here.

Same story with 4chan tbh. The rightoid infestation there probably goes hand in hand here, since I think there’s a large cross section. I’d think most of the people here are /b/tards as well.

Nah we still have the MDE card. Any rightoid goes too far, just call them MDEcels just like we can call leftoids pizzashills.

This sub isn’t rightwing by any standards, it’s still left of the average American by virtue of us loving bussy.

Cumtown>>>>MDE, I’ll say it with my chest.

If you watch either, join the mayocide as a victim please.

You, sir, are a full fledged downy.

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Tried for two whole minutes to figure out wtf that site was. All I could gather was that it’s literally AIDS.

chapo check

Wait, are you calling me a chapoid? Or asking if I listen to cth?

Cumtown is a socialist podcast

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I called myself a pretty feminist guy and I’ll I got was one comment calling me a creep as a joke. It’s extremely overstated because it depends on the time of the day where the circlejerk goes. I’d like more left-leaning discussion but I don’t think there’s explicitly right-leaning people who are regulars I can name

That would be sweet. But nah. Some people flame right*ids, but let’s not pretend that they’re not far more accepted around here.

Idk I'm genuinely not sure that they are.

Just milk pizzashill if you are so desperate for attention sweaty

uses the word sweaty unironically

Please, tell me more about how your opinion matters.

😴😴😴

You must be new. I welcome you because it appears that you managed to read and comprehend the sidebar. Even more impressive, you appear to be complying with its directives.

Don't spend too much time here with us, though, or you might pick up some of our filthy rightoid habits. Take a break from the interwebs. Go outside and enjoy the beauty of nature and the warmth of the sun. Get together with some of your like-minded friends and play a game of hide and go fuck yourself.

I'm just kidding about that hide and go fuck yourself thing. We all know you'd have to play alone because you don't have any friends.

idk i do pretty well

With the amount of agendaposts around here, dramatards are also sensitive crybabies

I’m surprised this post got so many points but I do think it’s because it’s making fun of redditors rather than having any actual drama. This is partly because you can’t sort by controversial then post the link because of the rules we have to follow for some reason but also this sub loves to get on the anti-Redditor soapbox. Not that that I don’t agree with it I just will make sure to post actual drama next time

I do think every group should be offended 24/7, it’s not a bad thing it’s just that it’s not entertaining when you ban people who seethe in a different direction. Something redditors as a whole support but this sub doesn’t do, which lets there be a free for all in stupid, but fun argumentation

I'm not reading that. U fucking fslur

Whatever. Gen-x

Cant be a sensitive crybaby if your incapable of feeling emotions

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Redditors calling other people narcissistic is peak reddit

Any act of selfishness, no matter how benign, is a narcissism.

Of all the social platforms, this is the one where the users don’t/rarely go by their real names or make self congratulatory posts. I think that makes it less narcissistic than the other platforms.

Also, the ability to downvote shit you don’t like or agree with is the perfect way to keep people’s narcissism at bay. There have been countless times where I’ve seen someone say the dumbest shit on Facebook and I don’t want to deal with replying to them and having my name permanently out there, but the only option I have is to “like” their comment.

really? have you seen how most of the mods on this site act? And the "powerusers". It may not be their real life identity, but they do have an identity on reddit.

A disorder in which a person has an inflated sense of self-importance. Symptoms include an excessive need for admiration, disregard for others' feelings, an inability to handle any criticism and a sense of entitlement. The disorder needs to be diagnosed by a professional. Treatment involves talk therapy.

Name one site where the mods aren't garbage power tripping freaks

MySpace

😢

argrama and other niche subs like PCJ.

We are a dying breed!

Pcj banned me for posting in drama

Lmao there's literally subreddits where people are like "Look what I did today!" and it's the most basic fucking task and all the comments are congratulating them for taking a single step out of not being an r-slurred infant at 20-30 years of age.

It’s like Psychicpebbles joke suggestion of a website called Diddit

Yeah I know there are some subs like that, but those subs and users make up the minority of subs and users on Reddit.

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It also makes it so that people get congratulated on whatever bullshit they feel like if they add a sob story to it. Fucking people getting told good job drinking a water bottle because they’re too depressed to drink water.

HydroHomies and WaterNiqqas both started as memes or jokes and they turned out to be a funny movement, if that’s what you’re referring to, lol

Wasn’t even that, it a post on made me smile or some shit where it literally was “drank a bottle of water today because my depression makes it hard to drink water.”

sounds like a troll post.

I've done that shit in arrrr---pics in the past. Take some stock photo or obscure photo posted online, repurpose it, flip it horizontally in photoshop, make up a story for the title and post it.

Enjoy your 10k free karma.

Yeah that’s pretty stupid, imo. But again, it’s a minority of redditors who do that, where every person on Facebook/insta/etc do that

I dunno, the whole front page/popular subs are just filled to the brim with people jerking themselves off for accomplishing basic ass tasks and everybody else gladly gives them asspats for being slightly less of a failson than they were before. And the amount of pathologizing people on reddit do to explain why they're lazy slobs is really hilarious. You're not mentally ill, you're just disgusting.

To claim it's a minority of redditors who do this kind of shit I don't think it quite accurate. Or if it is a minority, they're pretty fucking vocal and have enough supporters to get upvoted to the top so the rest of us see their bullshit.

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Redditors do it on a roundabout way though where they judge others from their failures and act as though they are morally pure individuals. Since they are anonymous, it’s not as easy for someone to call them out on their bullshit, aka male feminists of Reddit

But that’s not what narcissism is, though. Yes that’s selfish, entitled, and thinking they are better than some people on certain situations, but narcissism is obsession with oneself and thinking they alone are higher than others. I think the male feminist example comes very close and there are some that are narcissists though.

All I am saying is that it isn’t AS common as other platforms. It definitely still exists here, just not as rampant.

I'm sorry, have you been to pics lately?

"I'm black/female/🚄 and I did something, upvotes to the left!"

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Perhaps an exception to this rule for uncontroversial, massive subs ought to be made...

Admin rules not a mod one.

Well, yeah, but it's to prevent us harassing enlightening small, rarted vulnerable subs. Pics won't even notice.

It amazes me that people continuously see these hyper specific, culturally poignant and, above all, self-serving headlines (backed by science!) without just seeing through it. Like do these people waddle through life thinking "Wow! I'm always right! Like 100% of the time!"

Reality has a liberal bias sweaty 💅💅💅

Its just a common side effect of someone who's terminally online

Uh, it's just science? Maybe you've heard of it?

This is such a reddit-tier comeback lol. Its amazing how every redditor seems to have the same exact sense of humor

Yikes, not my job to educate you sweaty 🥵

Using an emoji on reddit? Big oof moment confirmed

Yeah but we use emojis ironically!!!!

T smug wojack 4chan internet retirement home member #12038832

Emoji posting is in 🤓

Was it ever out 😏

One of the main characteristics of people with Asperger's is lack of self-awareness

Like do these people waddle through life thinking "Wow! I'm always right! Like 100% of the time!"

Do you really need to ask this?

Yes, but that's because they have no personality or outside thoughts but "extremely online netizen." (Does "netizen" date me too much?) They visit R*ddit|Twitter|whatever because they're smart and cool. They're smart and cool because smart and cool people comment on R*ddit, like they do, so obviously they're smart and cool. They read comments that are sometimes mildly thought-provoking (see: the popularity of the sub that's about interesting things but only mildly so). Sometimes they see things that kind of surprise them, but they actually don't have their mind changed much at all. If you have never possibly had an opinion on jackdaws vs crows, you join a "side" and your new opinion feels like you've figured something out and are super smart.

So yes, they think that they are super smart and right all the time because they're on a site where people are super smart and right all the time. The constant reaffirmation with outright lies and bullshit is natural because of course everything they read about aligns with their "thoughts." They're super smart and right and cool.

Everything that challenges their worldview is Nazis. Grrr 😡

Maybe that will satisfy automod? Jesus fucking Christ

You see it in fitness subs pretty often where people think they have reinvented fitness by making their own program and all the dumb meat heads are doing it wrong. Then they don’t make progress, complain about everyone who does, and doubles down.

As much as I believe that some social media creators are evil human trash who need to go up against the wall (not Reddit though, you guys are cool 😎👌), I have to give them credit for discovering that people will gladly pay for algorithmic autofellacio.

"You're so wise and smart!" slurp slurp "Here's an article on how your unique identity group is the best group!" slurp slurp "May we suggest some friends who think exactly like you and will validate your bad life choices?" slurp slurp This is practically every social media algorithm ever by this point.

I mean, come on, at what point are we deluding ourselves that most social media is not an exercise in self-validating narcissism? It took me a while to figure out how to use social media correctly, but I'm proud that nowadays I avoid the echo chambers and use social media mostly for social science experiments and propaganda, like God intended. It took me a long time to reach this level of galaxy-brain enlightenment.

It hurts how accurate this is. I saw a post that is basically exactly what you summed up about how leftoids don’t fall for fake news like rightoids. Of course the responses there are almost verbatim of the sarcastic responses here even including the reality has a liberal bias but unironically 😂

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fuck off

Reddit circlejerk starter pack: are/murderedbywords, are/politics, are/science, are/leopardsatemyface and are/news. Am I missing any?

SRD

clevercomebacks, facepalm, ABoringDystopia (and associated "i am le depressed commie" hangouts)

both black and white people twitter

Both racial twitter subs, LSC, SelfAwarewolves, and antiwork as well as turning any non-political sub into a left-wing boomer posting sub (best example being facepalm).

The redditors who upvote these kinds of posts on science have to know it's all fake, right?

That would require any amount of self-awareness. So most likely not.

That second pic is great. The weed story written by Cheech & Chong got me

I hate all generations equally. The only socially acceptable date of birth is my birthday.

This, but only the type A chads like me who arrived at 4 am, ready to live their life. Lazy slobs who roll in after 10 am can get fucked.

Another 4amer 🤝 early on the grind since birth

Gigachad moment

lol i know multiple people born on my birthday and they all fucking suck

I agree, everyone your exact age is terrible.

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akira kurosawa was the man, you should be more appreciative

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making huge generalizations about entire groups of people by any delineation (age, race, gender, country of origin, etc) is at best pointless and at worst completed r-slurred

people are people, they can't be grouped this cleanly. expect srdines they're all terrible

Nuh uh actually every generation except mine is shit 😎

oh damn never thought of it that way

All generalizations or only the huge ones?

Stereotypes are generally useful, and no one except the autistic operate with a blank slate mentality toward others. I'm guessing your SAT scores were pretty low.

I'm guessing your SAT scores were pretty low

adults don't care about sat scores

you go out tonight and see some guy pull up in a nice car with a good looking lady friend on his arm, do you think, "wow I bet that guy had a KILLER sat score"?

grow up little child

It's a proxy for IQ. As for the rest, cope.

Stephen Hawking quote

A great stereotype is that anyone who says stereotypes are generally useful is pretty dumb

🤣🤣🤣

At least someone's enjoying himself. The redditors here can be rather touchy.

I do enjoy laughing at rslurs. Thanks

jimmies rustling softly in the wind

people are people, they can't be grouped this cleanly.

Yeah but zoomers aren't people.

do you think zoomers will be this fucking annoying about their (presumably gen X) parents? on the whole those guys seem pretty successful and not as delusional as burger boomers can get

Millennial here. My 12 year old son says "OK, boomer" and it pisses me off too. If I point out that I'm not technically a boomer, he just OK Boomer's me again and there's nothing I can do.

Lmao, imagine getting dunked on by your own 12 year old son.

Imagine not beating your children lmao

This is why the Bible proscribes caning.

My son was at least 15 before I had him trained enough to produce competitive bantz.

Lmao @ millennials getting triggered by their own shitty meme used against them

I have a friend who went on a rant about being called a "geriatric millennial" in the group chat.

One "ok boomer" later and he left for three days.

lmao, imagine getting BTFO by your preteen kid

The correct response to any kid saying OK Boomer to you is to respond with "Alright Zoomer"

Trying to deny your Boomerism automatically turns you into the crying soyjack.

"Boomer" is anyone slightly older than you who doesn't get something that you get - incl. retarded in-jokes etc.

That's the formula.

In that form it's got nothing to do with the initial context for that term anymore - it's just that "boomer" is a silly sounding word due to the "oo" and also because it kinda sounds like "bumbling" (which is the insult implied by the phrase); it wouldn't have become a meme otherwise.

Lol I call my older coworkers boomers sometimes and one of them actually gets a bit mad about it. Funny shit.

Zoomers do it too but it’s funnier because millennials get so pissy when you remind them that they’re 30 and out of touch.

Ah yes insidermag.net your trusted source for high quality, peer-reviewed data-journalism

The baby boomers are more sensitive now, but the millenials will be just as bad when they're old.

Give it 20 years and they'll be the ones on nextdoor complaining about their neighbor's 'hideous' extension.

nah, dreads and septum piercings will never be a good look

The only time I've ever given a shit about the nuances of f*male anatomy is when I was doing a hard guro/vore RP where I needed to remember how to spell the parts of her reproductive system that my character was eating.

Snapshots:

  1. Redditors jerk themselves raw - archive.org, archive.today*

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Snappy you can vore me any day of the week

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I live in the arctic and support climate change. I don't need all this stupid ice.

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But I can eat bugs

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Zoomers are like Gen X 2.0, too cynically r-slurred to do anything. Imagine Daria but on tiktok, you’ve imagined what’ll be zoomer culture in ten years

LOL this fucking guy thinks global warming is real!!!

Millennials are worse than boomers because boomers know their place. Boomers know they're geriatric and don't get modern humor. Millennials are a bunch of rentoids who make crappy memes about how they're suicidal and their lives suck despite living in the best time in human history. Honestly I don't really need to explain the other 1000 reasons millennials are insufferable because you already know.

They both suck because one created the other. Boomers were sensitive hippies who complained about the establishment but bent over and took it in the end, millennials are people who pretend to be socialist but won’t cancel Disney Plus because “who will make movies to help me with my sadbrain?” They complain about racism when it’s something not saying latinx but will let Disney kill brown kids, it’s pathetic. Boomers walked so millennials could run

Best but not good enough.

no shit, this is a massive W

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The comments in that thread man. Forget the mayocide for a sec, we need a millennialcide first

Science shows....

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