First off, thank you to my insurance risk pool for paying for me to get high 2x a week 🤗

I am on Spravato 84mg twice a week for treatment resistant depression having failed 8 or 9 SSRIs/SNRIs, hospitalized 4x, attempted twice (once which was almost fatal…in the ICU for awhile). People throw around the terms “abuse” and “trauma” an awful lot but some things I have experienced I've never even told another soul (even my sister). Really glad my psychiatrist is gay bc I feel safe talking about some of the CSA with him. I had a therapist before who I swear got “excited” talking about it.

I had been relatively stable for around 5 years until I faced some work stress in the last 12 months. I guess a lot of my problems came roaring back and I fell into a deep depression. I did inpatient, partial hospitalization and intensive outpatient and it didn't really help that much tbh. I am currently on 2X the max dose of Prozac and it just makes me unable to c*m or cry. It wasn't helping with the anhedonia and my panic attacks were still happening around 1x a week. I was running out of options (hence the $10k service dog….)

Enter ketamine 😍

Spravato is the FDA approved version for depression. You sniff it 3x 5 minutes apart and then they leave u in a room to go on a psychedelic trip.

WELL

This shit is working. I have my fourth session today.

The first two times I k-holed and had out of body experiences (seeing myself from above) and saw life was beautiful again….theres so much life to live. It was a lot like doing shrooms. The effects wore off pretty quickly but I was grateful for any respite from the despair. The third time I didn't have a full trip or anything (was more like being pleasantly drunk) but the effects have stuck around. As I wrote on another post, I am reading for pleasure, I have hopes and plans for the future and I believe all my problems have solutions.

My hot psychiatrist said they don't do it much at Northwestern bc of the tolerance you can develop. That part kind of scares me but hopefully I'll be able to crawl out of this abyss first.

If you have treatment resistant depression, it's worth looking into. I know for the Blues it just required failing one SSRI. There is a copay assistance program so you shouldn't have to pay much if anything to get it as long as you have private commercial insurance.

Meth makes people fricking cringe and weird and gets rid of there self awareness. Which is why meth heads are the lowest of the low on the human totem pole and nobody likes or wants to be around them. Because it turns people into basically what you just typed. Straight up insufferable weird butt scary MFs who nobody feels comfortable or safe being around. It also makes you look like a zombie. And overall behave un-human like. Yet you will try to justify it and will no longer have your human self awareness to see any issue. Congrats. Say goodbye to society. At least you have other meth heads and zombies to talk to and hang around.

> tfw sister is trans..

> "yo...is having kids or r*pe what makes incest bad ... Like what if you don't breed .. and it's not r*pe...then what is it ?"

Well, I guess you can't impregnate a biological male, so that's a faultless workaround to the morality of your incest debacle.

Don't care the butt was fat. We smoke meth were already fricking degenerates

!druggies

My wife is out of town but I am old so don't know how to score good shit.

This evening I am enjoying 2mg Ativan, my favorite delta 8 gummy, 1000mg of gabapentin, a very nice bottle of port and 10mg Adderall so I don't immediately pass out.

I miss my 20's when my Saturday was all speed, MDMA and poppers.

The obesity crisis really is staggering in scale. I wonder how many of the people on Ozempic actually keep the weight off or if they just get trapped in a gain weight -> take drug cycle. And why wont they just do meth instead? Are they stupid?

I remember these really stupid girls in high school saying Sublime was cool because they did drugs. Bradley Nowell had already written a bunch of songs about being a hopeless drug addict and died of a heroin overdose.

It was so absolutely repulsive I can only compare it to the time I saw a cardboard box my cat had slept in a couple weeks earlier and it was full of wriggling flea larvae.

Kush, a psychoactive blend of addictive substances, has been prevalent in the country for years. President Julius Maada Bio called the drug a "death trap" and said it posed an "existential crisis". One of the drug's many ingredients is human bones - security has been tightened in cemeteries to stop addicts digging up skeletons from graves. Groups of mostly young men sitting on street corners with limbs swollen by kush abuse is a common sight in Sierra Leone.

They blame Reagan.

Portland is recovering.

I love just vegging out in bed to this while tripping on mushrooms

Do you ever burn crosses?

I met a homeless woman smoking fentanyl on a very old probably rare gold gilded bible with illustrated steel engravings that weighed about 20-25 pounds. I have no idea where she got it but seems like it should be in a museum. pic.twitter.com/bSsYARAUXv

— Kevin Dahlgren 🥾 🥾 (@kevinvdahlgren) March 25, 2024

I will start off by saying I have never really had any problems with my peepee when I'm sober, I'm still a pretty young guy so that's expected. But for some reason whenever I take almost any drug that shit does not work (MDMA, lsd, coke in particular, sometimes even alcohol). This was one of the reasons I stopped using drugs as often as I used to, feeling like you have ED as a college age dude is absolutely the worst and not worth it most of the time. With this context, I was recently presented with a problem where a longterm-ish situationship and I were planning on going to a party together on MDMA. Obviously I want my peepee to work here.

This post is basically a summary of my month-long experimentation with combining different possible solutions with different drugs and the outcome of each. This drug section is one of the only reasons I use this site anymore so I want to contribute in some way as well. Also, for context and consistency, every experience here is with the same girl (not a man, I am not a cute twink), and unless otherwise specified everything is coming from the same source.

Attempt 1: Basic Viagra + Cocaine

Cocaine was a good starting point because it's easily the most consistent "peepee don't work" drug, with "coke peepee" being a pretty well documented phenomenon on forums. I've read hilarious stories on reddit from coomers desperately trying to rub one out on coke and failing because they can't get hard so if there is anything to test efficacy I figured that was the one.

I was able to acquire generic Viagra (sildenafil) pretty easily online just by lying on BlueChew's forms. I could even use one of my fake IDs (with a fake name and address, insanely, somehow) and a masked credit card to purchase it. I have no idea what kind of verification process they're doing over there but it's fricking r-slurred. Anyway I got one of their Sildenafil packs and tried out their 30mg plan. From what I googled a typical starter dose is 20-25mg so I figured this would be fine. I can confirm this dose actually does work, for me at least, and I was able to get over the coke ED with it.

Of course I was moderately worried about the interactions between Viagra and Cocaine. There's a lot of scary articles online claiming it builds dependence, is dangerous, etc, and this is probably true. But for whatever it's worth I tried the aforementioned 30mg + a couple lines + some alcohol and felt close to zero side effects. I did have a small headache the next morning but got over that pretty fast. Probably not something I would do regularly.

Attempt 2: Basic Viagra + Cocaine + Dapoxetine

A problem I did experience was finishing way too quickly. In the range of 1-2 minutes which is extremely embarrassing . I presume this has to do with the cocaine's either physical or mental effects, I can't say which. But anyway it was back to the drawing board.

Googling around I eventually discovered "Priligy," an SSRI also called "dapoxetine" that has a super short half life. Basically at some point, a doctor noticed that people taking SSRI's for depression had trouble finishing. After this, a drug company decided to create an SSRI with an extremely low half-life to try and isolate the "don't c*m" from the "frick up your serotonin receptors for life" aspect with an added "take as you need" feature. My first response to hearing that people were basically taking anti-depressants because they came too fast was honestly one of shock, that seems not at all worth it with the shit I've heard about SSRIs.

For whatever it's worth though, Dapoxetine taken on demand does actually seem quite safe. I read this study where only 11% of the people who stopped using it cited side effects as the reason, here for nerds , and the analyses of its interactions with the body shows that it entirely disappears in under a day. Basically as long as you're taking it as needed and not super often, it disappears way faster than other SSRIs and doesn't seem to come with any of the bad side effects. So I ended up ordering some from one of those sketchy Hong Kong online pharmacies (https://www.unitedpharmacies.md) to try it out.

I tried this combo with a little bit of alcohol. Holy shit this might have been the worst night of my life. I woke up at 6am, bolted to the bathroom, and had uncontrollable vomitting until 8am. I felt nauseous and extremely unpleasant the whole time. Any time I tried to drink water I would immediately puke it back up. Easily my worst, actually only bad ever, experience with drugs.

Attempt 3: Basic Viagra + Cocaine + Dapoxetine + Food

So it turns out you can't take Dapoxetine on an empty stomach, and if I wasn't r-slurred and done the slightest bit of googling, I would have known this. Seriously. After finding this out, I gave it a third attempt eating before I went out and that changed everything. No dizziness, nausea, nothing. You might be wondering why I would try again after the previous experience. Well the answer to that is I am r-slurred.

Now I can actually talk about the experience. Dapoextine definitely works. Black magic in that fricking pill. You can literally be trying to finish and that shit will just not happen unless you are locked in and concentrating. Really cool novelty but I imagine if you're on SSRIs normally this sucks. However, if you are r-slurred like me and just trying to frick while abusing drugs, it is perfect. I've already gone over every individual aspect of this in terms of function so I'll just say: darn. This shit works. The only issue with this combination is timing. Viagra has peak effectiveness around 1 hour after use, and Dapoxetine kicks in 2 hours after use. Trying to time two medications, while at a party, while doing cocaine/intoxicated, without a great idea of when you're leaving is definitely stressful.

Attempt 4: Tadalafil + Cocaine + Dapoxetine + Food

Tadalafil is Cialis, which is just like Sildenafil/Viagra except it's supposed to last 24 hours. So you can take it the morning before and be fine. I was able to get it shipped in 2 days from BlueChew. If you're wondering how my "prescription" was changed to easily, it's because BlueChew will literally let you place a "one time order" for any drug they sell once you're prescribed a generic in the same category. Once again I am wondering how this is possible/legal, but whatever.

Definitely recommend this over Viagra/Sildenafil. Worked exactly the same for mitigating coke-peepee without having to time anything. I think this is the combination that, if you're looking for something like a "superdick" and insanely wild s*x, is basically the one. The coke will give you insane energy and slight euphoria, and with Dapoxetine + Tadalafil you won't ever really worry about shit working or not working. Highly, highly recommend trying this at least once.

Attempt 5: Tadalafil + MDMA

This was also a great experience, although I didn't try mixing Dapoxetine with MDMA because of serotonin syndrome (genuinely this can kill you, do not do it). Very similar to the last one so not worth a paragraph, only drawback is that for me at least I was finishing way quicker. The good news is that Tadalafil reduces your recovery time to close to zero so you can go again.

Conclusion

This was actually such a wild experience for me that I felt in awe of modern medicine for a few days after. I also feel obliged to give a warning here that this can so, so easily become a mental dependency. The last two combinations set such an unrealistic expectation for any sober sexual interaction that I haven't dared to try them again, and I think that it's the end of my experimentation. I think the coke/dapoxetine/tadalafil is the "holy grail" of my r-slurred experiments but at the same time I genuinely believe that this is a mental hazard to experience. I also don't think any of this will build up a physical dependency or issue but I'm really, really, not trying to frick up my peepee or dopamine receptors for the rest of my life, so I'm stopping. I guess this guide could also be useful for someone just trying to test out the drugs independent of coke/mdma, I'd say go for it in that case too.

On the net though, honestly none of this was worth it. Coke is expensive enough and I don't want to pay another like ~$15 when its all said and done per night just to have my peepee work. I could just drink less/take less drugs instead. I was able to make back all my bread by selling the leftover sildenafil+tadalafil to friends, not sure what to do with the dapoxetine yet.

Well, that's about it. I hope you learned something or at the very least enjoyed reading about my quest to cure coke-peepee and related illnesses through even more r-slurred self medication. In summary: Fun novelty - not worth it otherwise. If you have any questions I will definitely answer, if you have any comments or want to call me funny names please also leave that below.

Already done! Try to make booze with sodium cyclamate. I think it makes something new when fermented. Made me feel very euphoric.

Recipe:

Can of Crandberry sauce

2 pieces of bread

20 calorie free sodium cyclame and dextrose packegs (.8 gs per package)

1 cup of golden sugar.

Cup of orange pekoe tetley tea

Foamed alot when shooken and was done in 4 hours of constant shaking by hand.

Makes me feel like mild MDMA but not the gross chemical feeling. Definitly releases dopamine and serotonin when drank I think.

Science: No yeast, just bread.

Done the same thing with flour and cyclamate for 3 hours and a cup of tea mixed in, it made the same results. Cranberry sauce this time was superb.

>Bro are you claiming that this fermented in 4 hours from adding some bread? Help me understand.

I think the flour or yeast from the bread reacts with the cyclamate. Idk tho. The yeast is on the bread from the air,i let sit on the counter.

I shook it for 4 hours non stop, smoking every 30 mins. Then added cyclamate and tea at the 2 hour mark. It started foaming like mad.

if anyone here has made homebrew; adding granulated stuff will cause foam like heck. but im sure sweetner turns into an MDMA like substance in 4 hours!

someone asks the sensible question

>op are you ok.

I am doing well. Try it for yourself if you do not believe me. People are toxic asf. Lmao. Haters going to dig an early grave, ahaha

another comment:

t feels like the opposite of N-Bome and feels really enjoyable, like a buzz of alcohol(which it does have) but more serotonin and dopamime release. No grog, just like a pleasant subtle buzz that is different than alcohol.

I call it C-BOME for now.

my grape juice booze fermented to dry in 7 days. 4 hours is not going to have any noticeable amount with cranberry lol

>you are a fricking b-word

I am done with reddit. With toxicity, no freedom of speech , and gatekeeping people, this is just one big 16 flame war place. Bye, frick you reddit.

I'm pretty chilled out rn

!druggies

I'm sure everyone else is as fascinated with my painkiller odyssey as I am, so here's an update.

Went 24 hours without oxys. I actually did surprisingly really well for the first 12 or so but it got pretty darn bad after that. So I'm making progress. God willing I might even be off it in a couple weeks. It's been so goddarn long I've got to be healing by now.

Unfortunately doc said I can't keep taking celebrex on a regular basis as it inhibits bone healing or something. Which is a problem because I think that was really helping a lot.

Does anyone here have any experience with making your bathroom dark mid trit (trip shit ) and going to different places? i just love tritting so I feel like this would be such an experience. sort of like those "Where you pooping the hardest" videos? if you have tried this please tell me how it went!

i cant imagine dxm would be fun while pooping water every 5 minutes tbh, lucky i dont get sick from it dark showers are cool

source

alr so I just bought a bunch of amanita muscaria and pantherina from https://mn-nice-ethnobotanicals.com

it is a mushrooms (no psylicoci in) with deliriant effects, but not like benadryl kr datura or scopolamine. it doesn't give u dementia or any fricked up shit like that.

shipping was great, package came 3 days later - u cn use the code Reddit10 for 10$% off ur order

I tried both panterina and muscarias. I dont notice an effect difference with pabtherinas theyre just more strong

these are the products I tried

• Amanita Pantherina Powder

• Amanita Muscaria Chocolate Bars

• Amanita Nice Sticks! (Pre Rolls)

• Amanita Pantherina 300mg Capsules - 30ct

• Amanita Pantherina Chocolate

to describe the lower dose feeling its kind of like being drunk but less heady I guess. I was trying to drive in gta but couldn't get far because I would just crash in to walls. I wasn't laughing like with weed or feeling much just uncoordinated even though I felt sober. I can walk and do stuff but for some reason I couldn't drivd in gta lol. imagine 2-3 shots but ur head feel sober and there are a few squiggly lines in ur vision. also ur head feels clear. the. u get real tired and lay down, then u fall asleep. I had a very vivid dream where it felt like I was actually in it but I cant really remember what I was doing. I wouldn't recommend d of ur just looking for a crazy dream experience. after I wake up I felt very well rested and even went back to sleep for 30 minutes after. so if u struggle with sleep try it maybe.

on a larger dose it's hard to deserve how it feels. ibfeel clear headed but also r-slurred but smart at the same time. I feel huge and I can see the air moving in shapes and the walls are breathing like shrooms. theres very slight tracers like when u hold ur eyes clothes but the. open them. u can't talk because I fumble my words but my mind is clear. slightly nauseous and the taste is bad FYI. I keep6 picking my phone up and then putting it back on the charger over and over and over u don't notice it til layer. feels like waiting kn a comeuppance but it'd a let down fr

all in all wouldn't recommend if u want to get high hut if u want to sleep real good or are into herbs m shit go aheaf