Noahfacemar/she
By far the straggiest commenter on this site
1yr ago#3266082
Edited 1yr ago
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I have had a six pack for the past 7 years of my life and am a proud owner of a thin badge, here are some simple tips in no particular order:
Not knowing how to cook isn't a real excuse. You don't need to start out with fancy stuff, just make stuff like chicken stir fry using frozen vegetables and serve it over rice. It's super cheap, takes like 15 minutes, and you can make enough to last you for the next 3 days. There are so many recipes that are insanely easy, you could make 1000 different things with chicken and rice alone just by adding different vegetables, spices, and sauces. Like twice a week I'll spend like 1 1/2 hours cooking a huge meal that I'll then eat for lunch and dinner for the next 3-4 days. That's far less time than I would spend if I was going out to eat every day. If you'd like I can send you some good recipes.
Unless you work a very intensive job there is no reason for you to be eating 3 full size meals a day. That's from when Americans still had real jobs, if you're just sitting at a desk all day you should cut down on either breakfast or lunch. I cook some pretty decadent dinners for myself and I'm completely fine with ordering unhealthy stuff at restaurants or pigging out on some sweets every once in a while. I'm able to get away with it because my breakfasts and lunches are pretty light and I just skip breakfast half the time because I'm not that hungry. (Not to say that you should order unhealthy foods at restaurants or eat a bunch of sweets, I'm able to do this because I have a healthy relationship with food)
Rice is a super cheap, low calorie, and filling breakfast. Just take a bowl of steaming hot rice (either freshly cooked or heated up in the microwave, I cook my rice in an instantpot), add some soy sauce and a sprinkle of MSG (like $3 on Amazon), then whisk a single egg in a cup with a fork and pour it over the rice and mix. It makes instant fried rice, tasty and extremely cheap for only about 300 calories and it'll keep you full for a while. It's even better if you add some sauteed mushrooms or top it with green onion. That's a staple snack in Japan and you weigh as much as their whole country put together.
Don't drink soda you fat frick, any drink besides water, coffee, tea, or wine is for poors and fats. Fast food exists for road trips and when you're really drunk, if you regularly go to fast food places in your local area you're a disgusting animal. If you go to a restaurant there's usually no need to finish everything, just eat 2/3 of it and take the leftovers home to eat for lunch the next day. Watermaxxing is really underrated. I have one of those big 32 oz Nalgene water bottles within arm's reach at all times. Even on days when I don't work out I still drink around 3/4 of a gallon. Any water you drink will be taking up place in your stomach for 0 calories. If your pee is ever even the slightest twinge of yellow you're a fricking cute twink.
Don't have snacks in your house, it's way easier to resist the urge once at the grocery store than at home where you could eat them at any time. Literally just have zero snacks in your house, if you're hungry then cook something or eat leftovers. If you do eat something like a bag of chips (you shouldn't you fat slob) put them on a plate or bowl instead of eating straight from the bag, that way you can portion out how much you'll eat at the start instead of endlessly grazing until the bag is empty.
I wouldn't even start exercising right away. There's a high chance of you getting injured because the last time you exercised was probably over 50 pounds ago, which would just lead to gaining more weight. I also don't want your fatbrain to convince you you deserve a treat to reward yourself for working out, that would just lead to gaining more weight. Maybe just go on walks for now and start out in the gym after a couple months of being committed to a better diet but at first I think completely changing your diet and your relationship with food is hard enough work.
I hope this helps you, if you need motivation just know that the majority people who are in shape secretly see fats as a lower form of human life.
Unironically all excellent advice. I recently lost like 30lbs doing all this, barely exercising except taking long walks a few times a week, and counting calories with chronometer. That last one is probably overkill but I'm an r-slur and find that helps a lot
conedno/no
women are a lot like a refrigerator. they are 6 feet tall, 300 pounds, and they make ice.
Noahface 1yr ago#3266593
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look at this guy suggesting you drink the stuff in pottys and THINKING THAT'S HEALTHY
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I have had a six pack for the past 7 years of my life and am a proud owner of a thin badge, here are some simple tips in no particular order:
Not knowing how to cook isn't a real excuse. You don't need to start out with fancy stuff, just make stuff like chicken stir fry using frozen vegetables and serve it over rice. It's super cheap, takes like 15 minutes, and you can make enough to last you for the next 3 days. There are so many recipes that are insanely easy, you could make 1000 different things with chicken and rice alone just by adding different vegetables, spices, and sauces. Like twice a week I'll spend like 1 1/2 hours cooking a huge meal that I'll then eat for lunch and dinner for the next 3-4 days. That's far less time than I would spend if I was going out to eat every day. If you'd like I can send you some good recipes.
Unless you work a very intensive job there is no reason for you to be eating 3 full size meals a day. That's from when Americans still had real jobs, if you're just sitting at a desk all day you should cut down on either breakfast or lunch. I cook some pretty decadent dinners for myself and I'm completely fine with ordering unhealthy stuff at restaurants or pigging out on some sweets every once in a while. I'm able to get away with it because my breakfasts and lunches are pretty light and I just skip breakfast half the time because I'm not that hungry. (Not to say that you should order unhealthy foods at restaurants or eat a bunch of sweets, I'm able to do this because I have a healthy relationship with food)
Rice is a super cheap, low calorie, and filling breakfast. Just take a bowl of steaming hot rice (either freshly cooked or heated up in the microwave, I cook my rice in an instantpot), add some soy sauce and a sprinkle of MSG (like $3 on Amazon), then whisk a single egg in a cup with a fork and pour it over the rice and mix. It makes instant fried rice, tasty and extremely cheap for only about 300 calories and it'll keep you full for a while. It's even better if you add some sauteed mushrooms or top it with green onion. That's a staple snack in Japan and you weigh as much as their whole country put together.
Don't drink soda you fat frick, any drink besides water, coffee, tea, or wine is for poors and fats. Fast food exists for road trips and when you're really drunk, if you regularly go to fast food places in your local area you're a disgusting animal. If you go to a restaurant there's usually no need to finish everything, just eat 2/3 of it and take the leftovers home to eat for lunch the next day. Watermaxxing is really underrated. I have one of those big 32 oz Nalgene water bottles within arm's reach at all times. Even on days when I don't work out I still drink around 3/4 of a gallon. Any water you drink will be taking up place in your stomach for 0 calories. If your pee is ever even the slightest twinge of yellow you're a fricking cute twink.
Don't have snacks in your house, it's way easier to resist the urge once at the grocery store than at home where you could eat them at any time. Literally just have zero snacks in your house, if you're hungry then cook something or eat leftovers. If you do eat something like a bag of chips (you shouldn't you fat slob) put them on a plate or bowl instead of eating straight from the bag, that way you can portion out how much you'll eat at the start instead of endlessly grazing until the bag is empty.
I wouldn't even start exercising right away. There's a high chance of you getting injured because the last time you exercised was probably over 50 pounds ago, which would just lead to gaining more weight. I also don't want your fatbrain to convince you you deserve a treat to reward yourself for working out, that would just lead to gaining more weight. Maybe just go on walks for now and start out in the gym after a couple months of being committed to a better diet but at first I think completely changing your diet and your relationship with food is hard enough work.
I hope this helps you, if you need motivation just know that the majority people who are in shape secretly see fats as a lower form of human life.
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how?
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Send @Saint_Augustine a body pic
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It’s actually Joan who mainly does it but I can help verify
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Unironically all excellent advice. I recently lost like 30lbs doing all this, barely exercising except taking long walks a few times a week, and counting calories with chronometer. That last one is probably overkill but I'm an r-slur and find that helps a lot
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look at this guy suggesting you drink the stuff in pottys and THINKING THAT'S HEALTHY
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😴😴😴
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