Driving home from anytime fitness a few minutes ago I saw a !burgers posting his highly processed and cancerous shopping cart. It shocked me that people in the year of creation 5784 (for a few more days) have not taken advantage of the wealth of nutritional and physiological knowledge available at their fingertips and continue to shovel such filth into their bodies. Then I realized most gentiles are incapable of synthesizing information without having a twitch streamer or propagandist do the research, thinking and interpreting for them. Accordingly, I have written up a guide to proper eating. Enjoy.

Foods

GOOD:

1. 🫘 Legumes (peas, beans, lentils, chickpeas, peanuts) should be the mainstay of your diet. They're filling, packed with fiber, vitamins, protein and slow-release carbs

2. 🍣 Proteins are important if you work out and occasionally if you don't. Some good ones include: chicken, turkey, eggs, sardines, salmon, mackerel, and tuna (occasionally - mercury). For poultry, avoid fried: rotisserie chickens are an option, grilled, roasted or sauteéd chicken breast, etc. I can't comment on seafood because I don't eat it but in theory should be okay too. Soy's fine for women

3. 🥗 Vegetables are great. They include:

🥔 Roots (potatoes, yams): filling, provide extra carbs when needed. Potatoes if boiled, baked or steamed then refrigerated turn to resistant starches which are very healthy. Fried potatoes are a tier or two lower. You also have turnips, carrots, and the like, which have vitamins and antioxidants. Carrots are great to snack on whenever and basically zero calorie
🥬 Leaves (spinach, arugula, sprouts, cabbage): good for fiber and antioxidants. Iceberg lettuce not included as it is basically water
🍅 Tasties (tomatoes, cucumbers, eggplants, onions, peppers) : have good nutrient profiles and make things yummy. Many are acidic which aids in digestion, cooking and the like. Not, generally speaking, as rich as leaves but certainly more palatable
🥒 Pickled and fermented veggies are excellent for digestion

4. 🍌 Fruits have many of the benefits of veggies, and their sugars tend to be healthier, for those with a sweet tooth. Citrus are especially good for reasons listed above. Note that tropical fruits like mangos (while delicious) don't have the nutrient profiles of their darker and more northern counterparts - blueberries, blackberries etc.

MEH:

1. 🌾 Whole grains whether wheat or rice-based can be eaten if you really need carbs, say after or before an intense workout, but otherwise don't do much for your system. More filling than their refined counterparts, at least

2. 🌰 Nuts and seeds are a mixed bag ( :marseytroll: ), high in beneficial nutrients and protein but also calorific and hard to digest. Consume sparingly

3. 🥩 Red meat whether beef, pork or lamb have the closest protein structure to humans so in theory would be optimal for tissue-building HOWEVER cause more inflammation than protein from sources less related to us. Eat when you need it and stay away otherwise

4. 🧀 Yogurt and certain cheeses, ghees and the like: the vast majority of the world is lactose intolerant so eat dairy rarely and in low-lactose forms. Pros are less inflammation and sometimes probiotic bacteria but besides fat you don't get much from it nutritively

. BAD:

1. 🍞 Regular Carbs: bread, pasta, corn and rice. Minimal nutritional benefit and a high glycemic index to boot. Most cultures relied on them because they'll keep you alive in a pinch, yield large quantities, and are easy to grow, but we live in the future

2. 🥓 Preserved meats are carcinogenic. Yes they taste good. Eat rarely, when you can't help yourself

3. 🥛 Dairy speaking broadly: milk, butter, cheese, etc. Enjoy acne breakouts

4. 🧈 Most fats: no benefit, high in calories. This includes dressings. Americans, shockingly, can't eat a fresh plant without lathering it in 500 calories of lipid first

. ATROCIOUS:

1. 🎂 Sugar, pastries, soda etc. Just keep yourself safe before the diabetes takes you

2. 🍿 Highly processed foods. Chips, cookies, snacks, prepackaged "meals", whatever. If it can sit on a shelf for a month without rotting it's got enough preservatives to massacre your gut biome

General Principles

a. 🤏 Minimize calories to what you need to survive and meet your goals - you'll live longer, feel better and look sexier

b. 🧠 Eat with your brain, not your eyes - food is fuel, though a lot of people treat it as a drug or lover

c. 💦 Water, surprisingly, isn't the best hydrator. Anything with particles in solution or suspension, like tea, lassi, soup etc is easier for your villi to grab on to. Otherwise, most of the liquid just flows through

d. 🍱 Don't drink water with a meal, or within ~30 minutes of one, unless you'll choke or are extremely thirsty. It dilutes your stomach's PH, worsening your digestion. If you have to drink with a meal, choose something acidic, like beer or wine

d. 🍳 Protein is useful when you're recovering from an illness or building muscle. Any more than your lb bodyweight's equivalent in grams (in an athletic person! less for most) is wasted, so be smart in how much you take

e. 🫃Carbs, fats and protein over your daily caloric needs all get converted to fat. Certain vegetables are basically the only food you can eat guilt-free

f. 🥘 Cooking is easy! Google a recipe or have chatgpt make you one, get ingredients and follow the steps. It's like legos but even more tolerant of mistakes (within, say, 25%) If you fear making too much, portion it out and freeze, refrigerate, and give to friends and loved ones if needed. They'll likely return the favor

g. 🏪 Stick to the perimeter of the grocery store (rare good reddit advice !nooticers). I get baking supplies, condiments, frozen and canned fruits and veg, and certain specialty items (matzo) from the inside rectangle, but otherwise: