Pip pip cheerio

You will never be a real pizza. You have no jordans, you have no BIPOC wrangler job, you have no substance addiction. You are a wannaby train twisted by autism and narcissism into a crude mockery of rdrama's perfection.

All the “rightoid hate” you get is two-faced and half-hearted. Behind your back dramatards mock you. Your parents are disgusted and ashamed of you, leftoids laugh at your posts behind closed doors.

Rightoids don't care about you. Thousands of years of evolution have allowed chuds to sniff out frauds with incredible efficiency. Even posts that are somewhat “controversial” look uncanny and unnatural to a rightoid. Your sentence structure is a dead giveaway. And even if you manage to get a rightoid to write an angry comment, he'll turn tail and bolt the second he gets a whiff of your lazy attempts at being contrarian in replies.

You will never be happy. You wrench out a fake smile every single morning and tell yourself it's going to be ok, but deep inside you feel the depression creeping up like a weed, ready to crush you under the unbearable weight.

Eventually it'll be too much to bear - you'll buy a rope, tie a noose, put it around your neck, and plunge into the cold abyss. Your parents will find you, heartbroken but relieved that they no longer have to live with the unbearable shame and disappointment. They'll bury you with a headstone marked with your rdrama username, and every passerby for the rest of eternity will know an autist is buried there. Your body will decay and go back to the dust, and all that will remain of your legacy is a skeleton that is unmistakably neurodivergent.

This is your fate. This is what you chose. There is no turning back.